July 14, 2018
Dear @chicago-punk-times,
I don’t wish any harm upon you, and I understand in full why you are mad at me. Chances of you actually seeing this have converged on never, but I figured I would at least make an attempt to contact you once more.
You have a right to be mad at me, however you have no right to blame ME for what any of my friends have said. I never sent anyone after you, I wouldn’t do that to anyone. I don’t know what she said, but that was in no way my fault, I don’t care how bad it was. At the same time I don’t blame you for being mad. I snapped, and I was growing frustrated, but there is a different between me attacking you and me standing up for myself because I’d had enough of your toxic behavior that I’ve repeatedly told you to do. I don’t understand what you are attempting to accomplish either. You had the nerve to say I was the toxic one, while you disregarded my physical health and lied about it. That issue is over, I know, but in your mind that doesn’t seem to be the case. You cut me out completely, and lied to my face about it yet again. You seemed convinced that we were best friends, but it’s funny knowing you still managed to do that to me. I wonder if I ever cross your mind, or if this was even hard for you to do. It wasn’t easy for me to experience.
Still, I wanted to invite you to pride this year, because I know it meant a lot to you last year. There’s a lot I’ve wanted to talk to you about, invite you to, share with you. I haven’t forgotten about you, as much as you may have wanted me to. Sometimes I come across something and I’m reminded of you.
My dad still asks about you too. He liked you a lot. He asked me to invite you to pride, and the Metallica concert, and he just wanted you to come over more. My uncle is a bassist and guitar enthusiast as well. He wanted you to meet him when he was in town. My step-dad also asks about you a lot, as does my mom. I already had to explain that they’d most likely never see you again.
I just want to know when you will be able to face me instead of hiding.
And you don’t have to worry about finding me at my work either, I had to quit because my leg grew unbearably pained and I could barely stand on it without holding in tears.
Even if you wish never to speak to me again, I hope you find success in the future, that your life improves. It’s clear you were not in a good place, but change will come. That I can promise.
Sincerely,
@the-steampunk-cyborg
