Whomstve The Funk Ate My Chocolate

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[ut-storyshift]

UT Storyshift Reboot Official Part One and Only

Post with 0 views. UT Storyshift Reboot Official Part One and Only

It’s so good to see you again.

A write up will be made detailing everything planned for Storyshift. Please look forward to it!

[thankyousirmayihaveanother]

just to be clear, I’m staying here as long as this site functions. I have 0 intentions of deleting this blog, I will go down with this ship if only to see exactly how bad it gets

[truntechgodhead]

tumblrs new anti porn algorithm seems to detect skin tones that means skin is banned. you can only jack off to skeletons now

[truntechgodhead]

wait fuck thats sa

[perfectlygenericblog]

Tumblr security snuck up behind him and snapped his neck before he could warn us about und

[deepinthedirt]

Hawkeye’s my favorite Marvel character I love this disaster man. He accessorizes with band-aids because he’s never heard of a watch.

[slavery]

How does anyone hate kids they are so funny I sold tickets to incredibles to this little girl and her mom and she’s like mom are we sitting next to each other and the moms like ya and the kid screamed YES so loud it broke my ears

[pkslider]

The other day I was bringing an older gentleman up the hill in a golf cart and we drove past this huge YMCA group of kids like 100 kids and driving past the first chunk like 10 of them yelled out “let me on” in unison and then since I’m driving so slowly to be safe, halfway in some kid leaned up and said “do you play fortnite” and I told him I played a little and he just pointed and shouted “THIS GUY PLAYS FORTNITE” and then like 20 kids started talking to me all at once about fortnite

[low-budget-mulan]

A kid asked me if I lived in the ambulance. I said yes.

[patron-saint-of-smart-asses-dea]

The hero we deserve

[treerot]

When I was on register at Kohl’s a little girl came through with her grandma and she was so very excited to tell me the meaning of her name (I think it was like warrior of god) and she begged her grandma for her phone so she could google to find out what my name means too

[newterjuice]

i wear two spinner rings on one finger and one time at my last job a young girl (probably 6-8) said “your ring is very pretty” and when i showed her it was two rings she GASPED and said “does that mean you’re marrying two people?!”

[siren-singing]

I have this necklace with a mermaid on it that I wear to work a lot and I got asked by a kid if it gave me magic powers. I leaned in real close and told her in a low voice it gave me magical girl powers but it was a secret. She got this real serious look on her face and said to her mom “that lady has superpowers, don’t tell anyone or the government will take her away”.

[business-pug]

The other day i had to give a speech at my school despite my horrific fear of public speaking and afterwards i had kid come up to me and say well done to me. It was so cute.

[mcr-minivan-deactivated20200108]

god I love tiny kids

[uberfluss]

there was a kid in one of our science camps and he spent the whole week in a lab coat and goggles screaming “CHEMICALS” at the top of his lungs. he wouldn’t even tell us his name for the first two days just screamed CHEMICALS instead.

[moth-doe]

I was watching these kids at church today and one of them screamed and threw a toy car into the wall and it broke and the other one looked over calmly and said “does your insurance cover that?”

[sunnyiesideup]

whaT THE FUCK

[f448-deactivated20200820]

YOU GET ONE

[noodlemage]

oh hey starfir- 

[la-malefique]

That is so cute.

[bigmeansweatydyke]

[gothterf]

they got married

[loving-women-is-rad]

what the hell

[tylorioussex-deactivated2024062]

Don’t we all deserve this kinda of happiness

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i gave my sister $100 for her bday, but i gave it to her in $1 bills that i folded into origami. so that’s how she pays for delivery food & now the pizza girl thinks she’s a stripper

[cornposting]

You’re really good at origami holy sh

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i learned it specifically to make these for this exact situation 

[realpersonscifi]

Aren’t you the same bitch that gave your sister $100 dollars in nickels?

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

same bitch

[wetmetal]

Yeah, neither of these things happened 👍🏼

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

listen here my good hoe, i can’t find photos of the 2000 nickels or the 20 stars, but i did not spend weeks planning meticulously inconvenient birthday gifts over a period of years just to get whaled on by internet gremlins. here is some equally compelling evidence for an anecdote i was saving for later:

it weighed 68.6 lbs

[judedeluca]

This is the 100 Star. Reblog to receive cash in unexpected ways.

[personsonable-deactivated201908]

me holding a gun to a mushroom: tell me the name of god you fungal piece of shit

mushroom: can you feel your heart burning? can you feel the struggle within? the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. you cannot kill me in a way that matters

me cocking the gun, tears streaming down my face: I’M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU

[miaislying]

Hey OP? What the FUCK does this mean?

[personsonable-deactivated201908]

decay exists as an extant form of life

[miaislying]

That’s a terrifying answer, have a nice day

[thedirtybrotherkiller]

hey now, how old are ya? not asking about the host body. curious since a bunch of humans tend to be kids. dont mind the question if it bothers you.

I'm 19! Guess I'm the outlier in this equation or something, huh?

Also I don't know what outlier means pfft

[undertalekinfessions]

spiderman, spiderman, does whatever a spider can, makes bad puns, laughs with sans, baddie crooks, catch these hands, look oooooout, here comes the spiderman - char char real smooch (marvel au/spiderman!chara shift)

[ghoststrawberries]

the ending of megalovania seamlessly goes into the beginning of megalovania and im sitting here listening to it on loop and all i can think is “the second time you hear it you dont think ‘oh, someone’s playing megalovania again’ you think ‘megalovania is a lot longer than i thought’” in john mulaney’s voice

[joy-crimes]

And by the end of the sans fight you think “WOW. Someone just played Megalovania 4 times in a row, OR they played it 2 times, and it’s just a REALLY LONG SONG”

[larsvontrierofficial-deactivate]

I’ve punched in like 7 at this point, then Frisk says to me ‘hey hey hey, before you punch in another Megalovania, let’s drop in one Bonetrousle.’

[climbing-class]

And that was when the night went from good to great

[askbeastlyflowey-deactivated201]

after seven megalovanias, in a row. suddenly…

“doo-dee doo-daa doo-dee doo-daa–”

and the sigh of relief that swept through the diner. people were ecstatic! it was like the liberation of the underground.

you know for years, royal scientists have wondered, “can you make grown monsters weep tears of joy by playing bonetrousle?” and the answer is yes, you can, as long as it is preceded by seven megalovanias.

[creepyjirachi]

…….and on the other hand, when we went back.

holy shit

[climbing-class]

Bonetrousle fades out.

Its dead quiet.

do-do-dO-do-dun-do-dun-do-dun-Dun

People went fucking insane

[pocket-asriel-deactivated201609]

No one could handle it!

No one could handle it!

[fangirling-yep-deactivated20200]

And they were surrounded by this semingly indifferent staff that were like “Yep same shit as always ”

[nihilismpastry-deactivated20230]

I fucking love this fandom. XD

[celtic-corvid]

“I attract canonmates”

A sigil for fictionkin who feel like they can’t find anyone from their canons! Best of luck to you guys and here’s hoping this sigil will help you find who you’re looking for!

[fictionkinfessionsarchived]

i made a list of all my chara timelines and what the fuck there’s 23 of them??????? im 23 chara’s what the fuuuuuck - char char real smooth

[thedirtybrotherkiller]

My name’s Chara, I’m seventeen, and I never fucking learned how to SPARE.

[thedirtybrotherkiller]

Sorry for sliding in your inbox like this but we should probably make a Swap Pap fan club honestly,,,

HELL TO THE FUCKING YES WE SHOULD!!