The Great H @thegreath - Tumblr Blog

Zuko: [Walks in and puts a human skull on the table where Sokka and Katara are sitting]

Katara: Uhhh... Zuko?

Zuko: What?

Sokka: The skull?

Zuko: Oh yeah, that's my father's.

Sokka and Katara: [lurches back] OH MY GOD!!!

Zuko: No, it's not his. It belonged to him. He'd put it out every Christmas to remind us that even though it's the holidays, people still die.

Zuko: Plus, you can put candy in it!

Azula: *Enters* Hey guys... Aww, the Christmas candy skull! You remembered!

niceinchnails

isyourpostfunny

not really

niceinchnails

I know right i hope OP like for real dies

isyourpostfunny

i love you

niceinchnails

I love you too

hollowboobtheory

i promise you have no idea how this is going to end

knightofleo

mananabuffins

I've never seen a more deserved cat slap

dogpuppy

the-mad-prince-of-denmark

thecheatinghomunculus

from today's entry:

squaresaw

So last month I got hit by a car and died right. Which I didn't initially realize until I watched some guy haul my body into his pickup and drive off. Which, being that it's deep in rural Michigan, I assume means my body will make some venison jerky and maybe some wall decoration, and I'll be resigned to being one of hundreds of deer ghosts floating around Saginaw, which is w/e. But then I find out the guy works at a taxidermy shop or something, and he's actually pretty good at stuffing and mounting deer carcasses, which I come to find out when I find myself face to face with my old body in the shop window. So naturally, I figure since ghosts need to possess something to interact with the living world and etc etc etc the most logical thing to do is to possess my own body, since it's basically a statue of myself. And a little surprisingly, it actually fits like a glove. Like, since it's my body, it feels like stepping right back into place. So I get out of town and back to my herd, eventually. And that's where the trouble starts coming into it, because after I get settled again, I don't know how to explain to everyone else what feels so weird. Like since I can move my body and do everything I used to do, it's functionally the same, like nothing happened. Or it SHOULD be, so I don't know how to explain how it's NOT. But it's just hard to explain it to someone who's never been hit by a truck I guess

parkchanwoohoo

Genuinely evil and dark-sided to put the periods between the letters in "milf" and "dilf." Like what is M.I.L.F. that is a supervillain organization composed entirely of cougars. Whoa that's a great idea actually post canceled hold on

draculaforce

A burger and fries should be five dollars <checks wallet> a burger and fries should be two dollars

byjove

the New York mayoral debate was one of the funniest things I have witnessed in a long time when divorced from the horror

byjove

Curtis Sliwa is the sort of character the writers of The Sopranos wish they had thought of first

byjove

Cuomo was like a rotting dead salmon on the debate stage and I know all moderates had to go outside and cry after that one. Mamdani’s holding back giggles every time his opponents spoke because what they kept saying was so utterly ridiculous or lackluster they lowered the bar for him to subterranean levels. Cuomo was fighting for his fucking life on that stage because he was being beaten into a pulp, Mamdani was fighting for his life because he was on the verge of hysterical laughter and Silwa has been fighting for his life on the mean streets of New York for all of his 71 years, apparently.

byjove

debate host: Have you ever purchased marijuana from a dispensary?

Mamdani: Yes and the longer this debate goes on the more I wish I had smoked that joint before I got here.

Cuomo, who famously prefers uppers: No.

Sliwa: BACK IN THE 70S THERE USED TO BE THIS BROAD WHO STOOD OUTSIDE OF RADIO CITY MUSIC HALL AND SOLD BROWNIES, I ATE 3 OF THEM AND ENDED UP IN THE TRUNK OF A DODGE CHARGER IN RENO NEVADA. AFTER I WAS SHOT 5 TIMES IN 1992, SHE SHOWED BACK UP AND STARTED TRYING TO HAND ME ONE OF THEM, I SAID “DID THE GAMBINOS SEND YOU? ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?” SHE SAID NO AND SHE BECAME MY 5TH WIFE.

chufff

birdblitz

umatober day 6 / tokai teio

birdblitz

girlfriends

reallyreallyreallytrying

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted