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The Drinking Game: Ant Man and The Wasp

Published on July 9, 2018, by Ailish Elzy.

As of now, with a decade worth of the MCU, we’ve officially split these movies into two categories.

There are the light silly ones. Movies like Spider Man: Homecoming, Thor: Ragnarok or Guardians of the Galaxy. And there are the dark intense serious ones like The Avengers, Dr. Strange and Captain America Civil War (or honestly any Captain America). This is easily in the light silly category, but it’s toward the bottom. First of all, it should be called The Wasp Featuring Ant Man because she does way more than he does in this movie, but that’s beside the point. One refreshing thing about this movie is that the stakes are low AF. The world isn’t gonna end, the city isn’t gonna explode.

Ant Man and the Wasp is really just a film about people trying to have a normal family. Scotty is trying to do a good job as a dad and be a good influence on his daughter Peanut. Hope and Hank are trying to reach their long-lost mother and wife Michele Pfeiffer. Morpheus is trying to help save his surrogate daughter Ghost who is slowly dying of some quantum disease.

There was a review that basically said there are a lot of moments where side-characters steal the show and it’s true, but I really think Randall Park was overlooked in that review. Randall is one of the funniest parts of this movie, second to Michael Peña, and I would love a hilariously mundane spin-off film of just him trying to do his job right, learn some magic, maybe make some new friends and deal with superheroes in a city where they don’t usually have superheroes

Lastly, as someone from the Bay Area, I hate when movies disrespect the logic of the location (I’m looking at you, San Andreas) But I will also say, most of these MCU movies happen in some version of New York so I’m glad they’re giving the west coast a chance to show they deserve to get their city destroyed, but because it’s Ant Man and he goes from small to large, the damage is pretty low which is nice.

Drink When

Grown-ups like magic

There’s a fish metaphor

Scott wakes up from being knocked out

There’s a flashback (Double when it’s Drunk History style)

Hank is the third wheel

The Drinking Game: Uncle Drew

Published on July 9, 2018, by Ailish Elzy.

If you’ve ever seen a Gold Bond, The General or Icy hot commercial and thought, “wow Shaq is a great actor, I’d love to see him act more in heavy prosthetics” you are in luck.

If you’re looking for that light-hearted really silly summer comedy, don’t sleep on Uncle Drew. It seems dumb on the surface, but trust me when I say it’s the right kind of dumb. For a film that got its inspiration from a Pepsi commercial, it manages to include everything you want for a summer blockbuster: A dance-off, a car chase, and Tiffany Haddish.

Imagine if there was an alt universe of the Carmichael Show where Bobby Carmichael and Nekesha got back together, but in this version, Bobby didn’t have a loving and supportive family and was actually an orphan and used basketball as a way to cope with his feelings and find his place in the world. And just when his life goes to shit and Bobby Bottleservice steals his basketball team and what he thinks is his only shot at success, he meets Kyrie Irving and finds new meaning in life from these old ballers.

Drink when

There’s a celebrity cameo

Someone swishes

“She Ready!”

They mention another basketball player

Someone makes a short joke

It gets meta (Pass the ball Kobe, or I’ve seen Get Out”)

Montage Time!

Shaq does karate outside the dojo

The Drinking Game: Upgrade

Published on June 29, 2018, by Ailish Elzy.

Do you ever imagine what would have happened to Ryan Atwood’s brother Trey in the OC if he wasn’t shot by Marissa?

Let’s pretend we’re in a not so distant future where he’s still the fast car loving, all old school, grease monkey, but he’s married (don’t worry if you forget, he’ll continuously remind you). He’s all analog and his wife is all digital. Opposites attract I guess? They live in a black mirror-esque future with self- driving cars, smart houses that put on your evening playlists as soon as you’re home and two huge tech companies competing to be the best. So maybe it’s not that hard to imagine. Anyway, Trey (whose name in the movie is GREY TRACE so nice try hiding the fact that he’s “not Ryan’s brother”) and his wife gets in a strange car crash, she’s murdered and he’s paralyzed. Later he’s given the opportunity to walk again IF he puts a computer chip in his body to controls his motor functions and read his mind. BUT he can’t tell anyway about it, BUT ALSO DON’T WORRY IT’S ALL FREE. So yeah, seems very chill. Just casually put Siri in your spine. The spine Siri called Stem helps Grey/Trey do everything from pour whiskey like a robot, remind him of everything he touched to wipe fingerprints from a crime scene and straight murder some fools. It’s honestly pretty awesome. This movie has Ex-Machina meets Hardcore Henry vibes and I am here for it honey!!! Go see it and play this drinking game!

Drink when:

When he says “my wife”

When he asserts that he hates computers or anything made past 1970

When you realize you’re not watching Tom Hardy

When Trey/Grey looks away from murdering someone

The Drinking Game: Ibiza

Published on June 29, 2018, by Ailish Elzy.

With the success of Girls Trip and Rough Night and the need for more movies with a whole bunch of ladies, Netflix was like “I think I’m gonna try and bank on this trend”. But they’re Netflix so you really never know. I feel like they’re constantly playing darts blindfolded hoping they’ll hit that sweet, sweet bullseye like they did with Stranger Things or Master of None, but this is, unfortunately, more of a flop like Friends from College. It’s got a ton of people I love from other things, but it just didn’t blend right.

The plot of this movie is pretty straightforward, girlfriends go to Spain, one falls in love/lust with a DJ, they follow him to Ibiza do a lot of drugs and drinking and have to make it back to Barcelona in time for the business meeting they’re actually there for. If it sounds bad, it’s because it is. I really, really wanted to like this movie, but it was such a bad representation of party culture in Ibiza that even the island of Ibiza is trying to sue Netflix. The best part about this movie is Phoebe Robinson and literally everything she says. If anything, good comes out of this I really hope it’s 100 more roles for Phoebe. Honestly these girls are all talented and they should be given the chance to make a shit movie and then make a great one if dudes are allowed to do this constantly (*cough* Armie Hammer *cough*)

I don’t really recommend seeing this movie, but I will say that it makes for one HELL of a drinking game! You really don’t even need that many rules. I promise you, you will get shit faced so play with caution!!

Drink:

Anytime someone says Leo West

Anytime someone says Harper

Anytime they say where they are (This is New York, I can’t believe we’re in Spain, Welcome to Ibiza)

Every time a main character makes out with someone

Any slo-mo montage (twice if they’re drinking during it)

The Drinking Game: Hotel Artemis

Published on June 29, 2018, by Ailish Elzy.

There was an old lady who ran a hotel She had such bad anxiety, but could save a cartel She fixed all their wounds and they followed her rules Until Honolulu brought in a pen full of jewels

Finally, from the guy who brought you Iron Man 3 and the upcoming Sherlock Holmes 3, a film that grabs all your favorite side characters from past and future Marvel properties and puts them in a hotel/hospital for criminals. The concept of the movie is very cool, but there are some elements of Clarice/The Nurse/ Jodie Foster’s backstory that really make the movie fall apart. I guess it’s that classic plot line of the highly intelligent capable person being easily persuaded to throw away everything they stand for because of emotions.

This movie has some badass fight scenes with your favorite one legged lady from The Kingsman and some classic lines from your favorite Guardian of the galaxy including “Do you see this badge, it means I’m a healthcare professional!” Charlie Day gets to act as an arms dealer which on paper seems cool, but it’s so hard to not think he’s just Charlie Kelly playing the wild card. And Zackary Quinto gets to play a bitch of a son to Jeff Goldblum which Quinto should play more of. There’s one solid father and son scene which if expanded, I would watch the prequel movie of. I think Paper Boi gets shortchanged, but that’s just the nature of the story they’re telling. In my opinion, Drax and Killmonger’s dad steals the show and it’s worth seeing because of them and who they could potentially be if they weren’t alien types but were still just as badass.

Drink when…

Someone mentions The Rules Anyone breaks The Rules Callback to any previous line They talk about the riots There’s a flashback Someone uses a future cellphone They drink

The Drinking Game: Tag

Published on June 29, 2018, by Ailish Elzy.

Tag is like Game Night meets Vacation, but with none of the character development. But for me, that’s perfect because it makes for the ideal drinking game since there isn’t that much to pay attention to. It’s a silly movie inspired by a true story about a bunch of dudes who play tag. That’s it. That’s all there is. There’s no hidden love story. There’s no coming of age. There are no characters that develop. It’s just a bunch of friends trying to tag their one friend who’s never been tagged. That being said, there are some hilarious Sherlock Holmes inspired sequences and a killer performance by Isla Fischer. I think ridiculous wedding scenario movies might be her calling. When they inevitably remake The Hangover with an all-female cast, she needs to be Ed Helms’s character.

Drink when…

There are Flashbacks Whenever someone gets tagged Slo motion There’s a nut tap There’s a butt punch Chili smokes weed “Why didn’t you say that in the first place?” Ben Franklin Is quoted The women are better at the game then the dudes

The Drinking Game: Set it Up

Published on June 29, 2018, by Ailish Elzy.

I really miss this kind of romantic comedy. One that’s so unapologetically what it is. One of that kind that was so popular in the 90’s and early 00s that usually starred Sandra Bullock or Renee Zellweger. The kind where you knew exactly what was gonna happen beat by beat, but you’re still so invested anyway. As much as I love newness and variety in movies, sometimes it’s nice to take it back to a classic formula. I’m not saying it works or it doesn’t work, it’s still a rom-com so take it at face value. What I am saying is it’s a fun spin on something you probably already know and love. On paper it seems cool, two young white assistants get their overbearing bosses (who are successful people of color - shout out!) to start dating so their jobs will be easier. Of course, hilarity ensues, people make out, there’s drinking and hijinks and all the best parts of a romantic comedy. It’s a great flick to have a drink to!

Drink When

Taye Diggs and his hetero-normativity (ass man, bikini wax) Pete makes out with a dude They say some form of “Set It Up” Someone is drunk Charlie talks about being punched in the dick Suze is a shitty girlfriend Cyrano de Bergerac

Weekly Playlist | Then & Later

Published on June 29, 2018, by Stephanie Méndez.

Here are a few of Stephanie’s favorites across the genre boards. Songs include original samples and the contemporary songs they were flipped into.

Listen to Then & Later on Apple Music or Spotify.

Photo Gallery: San Francisco Pride Parade

Photos by Sabrina Luppi from the San Francisco Pride Parade, June 24, 2018.

The Drinking Game | Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom

Published on June 22, 2018, by Ailish Elzy.

Ah Yes, the reboot sequel. A quintessentially perfect summer movie and what our cinema-going experience will be for the rest of our lives.

I just gotta say this up front, this is not a good movie in terms of story. Of all the Michael Crichton future theme park content you could be watching, you’re better off binging Westworld. The cinematography is cool, the dinos look p dope, the green screen acting is on point and there’s a great Spielbergian oner that takes place underwater. But story-wise major facepalm emoji. Almost nothing makes sense, it’s very predictable and everyone who’s been in a Jurassic Park movie before is doing a lot of the same (looking at you BD Wong). It really left me wondering, how many reasons and excuses can they create to bring people back to dino island? The answer is five as you’ll see in the post-credit scene where the movie will finally live up to its name and it’ll be a true Jurassic World.

If you wanted to see this for Jeff Goldblum please turn around and do not pass go. You’ve seen all two of his scenes in the trailers. Honestly, the three best parts of this movie are aggressively underused; Goldblum, the insane water dino and breakout star and best screamer, Franklin. He gets a lot of scenes and lines, but he’s also the voice of the audience asking the smart questions like “why am I here?” and “how is this better than a T. Rex?” Of all the gap tooth, bespectacled ethnics they added to this movie for diversity, he’s the best.

You don’t really need to see this movie. But if you do end up seeing it, do yourself a favor and play this drinking game.

Drink when...

A ladder doesn’t do it’s one job right Blatant product placement (Goodyear, Budweiser, Becks) Franklin talks about T. rex Lil granddaughter girl is creepin in the shadows Franklin screams You guys look, Bryce isn’t in heels this time! Pratt tries to tame Blue A Jeff Goldblum scene happens

Weekly Playlist | Mos Steff

Published on June 21, 2018 by Stephanie Méndez.

First of all, today is Stephanie’s birthday!!! SO LET’S ALL MAKE SURE TO WISH OUR FAVORITE HYPHY GEMINI A HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Thank you for always comin thru with the best music for every mood. And thank you for sharing your gift of photography, and all around amazing personality with us, too. We love you!

In honor of her born day, Mos Steff (as we know her on the internet) has blessed us with a playlist of the initial influences that made her love music as much as she does now.

Listen to the playlist “Mos Steff” on Apple Music or Spotify.

Note: it’s best if you hit shuffle!

The Drinking Game: Ocean’s 8

Published on June 19, 2018, by Ailish Elzy.

Or as others might call it, Gravity 2 because Sandra Bullock still doesn’t need George Clooney’s help. She can land a spaceship and steal over $100 million worth of jewels without his help thank you very much. The biggest thing I learned from this movie is that when Sandra Bullock says she’s gonna do something SHE’S GONNA FUCKING DO IT! Don’t sleep on Sandy! Also, don’t sleep on women because bitches really do get stuff done. This movie proves it.

It’s the story of a heist and bunch of smart ladies. There are no love interests, just a ton of amazing outfits and all of these actresses playing their peak character. They’re all a heightened version of what we know and love them as. Rihanna is a badass blunt smoking hacker, Anne Hathaway is a ditsy actress, Mindy is a celebrity-obsessed talented jeweler. It all works, the characters and the heist. Honestly, if you had 5 years to plan a heist, wouldn’t you be able to plan it out perfectly?

Drink When

We meet a member of the crew Someone mentions Danny Ocean Anna Wintour shows up Daphne’s cleavage is a thing Celeb cameo 9 Ball smokes weed Someone is chewing gum Sarah Paulson is a mom

Weekly Watch | June 18, 2018

Published on June 18, 2018, by Ailish Elzy.

This week I have a weird hodgepodge of tv shows, news shows, movies and web series because it’s the summer and all the rules are gone!

Queer Eye

You ready to cry, bitches?

I’m not even joking, I promise you if you cried in the first season you will cry THREE mins into the first episode of this season. They really know how to get you!! I don’t think This show lost any of its mojo probably due to the fact that the first season only premiered earlier this year. They know who they are and also what their audience wants. If you liked season one there’s literally no reason you shouldn’t also watch season two!

Watch it on Netflix

Hereditary

You ready to be terrified?

Holy shit this movie is a WILD ride!! Seriously. In the interest of not giving away anything, I will tell you two things. One: pay attention to the mise en scene (that’s film talk for things on screen like props, setting or décor,) but more specifically the miniature models the mom makes because they tell a whole story. Two, this movie is highly worth seeing even if scary movies aren’t your deal (which they aren’t for me). It weaves in a lot of different horror genres and sub-genres so it feels like something you’ve seen before, but at the same time like something totally new.

Catch it in theaters!

Vice’s Capitalism series on Youtube

You ready to learn?!

I don’t know how I stumbled on this series, but I’m glad I did. This series on YouTube is all about different ways people contribute to capitalism. The host, Meg Charlton, visits people who live in a cooperative living community (like a chill cult) and two Instagram influencers who live out of their van (mostly for the likes). It’s really interesting and you’ll learn a lot. Mostly that generally white dudes are the ones who are trying to escape capitalism, or at least those are the only people Vice could find. Either way, it’s really interesting!

Watch it here

Kimmy Schmidt

You ready to laugh?

It’s a short season, but it’s still jam-packed with jokes. This season is aggressively feminist which I LOVE, but there is one episode that doesn’t need to be in it. For the plot development and just in general. It’s like in Stranger Things when they follow Eleven to Chicago, just a waste of an episode. Titus is still the star of the show, Jacqueline is still super white and Lilian isn’t actually as annoying as in past season. There are some great guest stars (Greg Kinnear and Busy Phillips to name a few) The worst part is it’s only half a season.

Watch it on Netflix

The Break with Michelle Wolf

You ready to…I got nothing.

This show is dope! Plain and simple. I love how different and unique each of the female-hosted talk shows are. They’re really tailored to each individual and Michelle Wolf is no exception. She had hilarious fake commercials or sketches in between segments, a great DJ and has had some hilarious guests so far. It’s pretty early on, but I’m excited to see how this show continues!

Watch it on Netflix

Weekly Watch SPECIAL EDITION: Food Shows

Published on June 18, 2018, by Ailish Elzy.

I wanted to write this food show edition of Weekly Watch for a little while now and was taking my time with it so I could watch all the shows and get a real feel for what to suggest. And then Anthony Bourdain died and it made me think about these shows more seriously.

We’ve always had the Food Network and the Cooking Channel, but we’ve recently had an upsurge in the quality of these shows and I really think you can trace it back to Bourdain. Whether you were an early fan of Parts Unknown or No Reservations or you just recently got into Chef’s Table or Ugly Delicious, you have Bourdain to thank for that.

There’s a lot that has been written in the past week and will continue to be written about in the years to come because Bourdain had a profound impact on the food industry, on the food documentary and on how we see different parts of the world. I only recently got into his shows in the past three years, but I very quickly fell in love with his passion, his sense of adventure and his honesty. He was an incredibly inspiring and fascinating dude to watch.

I’m not here to talk about him in depth, mostly because I don’t feel like that’s my place. I want to talk about the impact I’ve seen on food television because of him and his legacy. This will be a slightly different Weekly Watch. It’ll all be food shows I love and recommend watching because this is a large umbrella of a genre that’s worth exploring.

The real reason I wanted to write this in the first place was that I recently acquired two new books. One about Wine called Wine. All The Time by comedy writer and leisure enthusiast Marissa A Ross. A book I highly recommend no matter how much or how little you know about wine (I know very little). The other book I acquired was Cravings by supermodel and well-known internet person Chrissy Teigen. Both books are very dope and enjoyable in different ways.

Since I’ve been reading them, I’ve subsequently stopped watching scripted shows and fallen down a very enjoyable hole of watching shows about food and wine. It’s really hard to watch these shows and not immediately think you’re a talented chef yourself. Shows about food and cooking are highly underrated in my opinion. It’s not just your mom’s Food Network anymore either, it has really expanded.

I’m sure you’ve noticed the influx of well-produced food-related documentaries on Netflix or channels expanding on their brand and adding a food show. It’s not even just on TV. YouTube holds some very well produced fooding shows (which is what I feel like we should be calling them) from channels like Tastemade or Bon Appetit as well as homemade shows by regular-ass kids.

I gotta say I am totally here for this! Food shows are a wonderful break from scripted TV. You can throw them on in the background when you’re cleaning but you can also sit and watch them like you would any other show. You can even watch them when you’re cooking, although you might feel inferior depending on if you’re watching Chef’s Table and if that’s the case, maybe just throw on Nailed It when you’re making food to feel a little better about yourself. I will say the one place I don’t recommend watching these shows is at the gym. It should be pretty obvious, but I thought I could handle it and then immediately got SO hungry and had to make a pizza.

If you need it, here are some shows I recommend, where you can find them and a solid episode you can start with if you’re unsure.

Nailed it

Why it’s good: This show is almost everything I’ve ever wanted a competition cooking show to be. It’s silly, it’s realistic, it’s short, and they win money. The premise is home cooks try to recreate all those things you see on Pinterest with people making cakes that look like emoji’s or Spongebob. Nicole Byer, the host, is EASILY the best part and really the only reason to watch it!

A dope episode to start with: Honestly the first one. The episodes are short and you’ll get right into the vibe of it.

Where you can watch it: Netflix babyyy!! Also they just got renewed for season 2

Chef’s Table: Pastry

Why it’s good: If you love high quality docu-series AND food, you’ll love this. It’s got that cinematic quality goodness mixed with a really heartwarming story about someone trying to achieve their dreams. They really do a good job of weaving a narrative into these people’s stories of success.

A dope episode to start with: Milk Bar. It’s fun, it’s really American, and it shows you a very approachable way to cook delicious and simple desserts.

Where you can watch it: Netflix duh!

Bonus: Pastry is the fourth season, the other three seasons focus on non-pastry foods, or what they call in the biz, food. There’s a fantastic episode about Nancy Silverton (season 3 episode 3) that has such a great dramatic arc it really seems more like a narrative show than a documentary.

Ugly Delicious

Why it’s good: I was particularly drawn to this series because they focus on one type of food per episode. And they really know how to get you. Episode titles include: Pizza, Tacos, Stuffed and Fried Chicken. Honestly, unless you’re a vegan, what’s not to like? They take you all around the world. They eat the highest quality, the lowest quality (usually fast food) the weirdest and the least expected versions of whichever food they’re profiling. You’re definitely going to learn something new about a food you’ve loved. The style of this show is also particularly cool. They’ll do a parody genre, or have a section just be animated. They really have fun with it which makes you as a viewer have fun with it!

A dope episode to start with: I’d say pick whichever food you like the most and go from there.

Where you can watch it: Netflix (obviously!!)

Frankie Cooks

Why it’s good: If you’re into Italian home cooking, but you’re a little intimidated, BUT you also want to learn about why you’re supposed to do the things you do while cooking, Frankie is your dude! His hyper-enthusiastic personality will draw you in, but his pasta knowledge will keep you coming back for more. I’m a HUGE fan of pizza and pasta and have had many of his meals made for me by my boyfriend who is both obsessed with his videos and the one who introduced me to

A dope episode to start with: As will become clear with a lot of these, it’s best to find the food you want to learn more about and start with that, but the one that got me into Frankie was this video.

Where you can watch it: Youtube, baby! Here’s his personal channel and here’s where you can find him on Tastemade.

Good Times with Jen

Why it’s good: Another Tastemade person! Jen is such a delight. She specializes in Filipina food and comfort foods that are easy to recreate at home. Her personality is fun and authentic which can be really rare with these kinds of videos (trust me, I watched a lot). She has a lot of great videos of her getting stoned and making or attempting to make food which is so fun to watch. But I really love her videos because I feel like I learn more about Filipino food and they’re actually dishes I can eat and enjoy (I’m allergic to a lot of foods).

A dope episode to start with: A funny video to start with is this one, but a good food video is this Filipino bacon recipe.

Where you can watch it: On Tastemade’s youtube!! Or just follow those links.

Huang’s World

Why it’s good: I think this was the first cooking show on vice that I ever watched and I really loved it. I was REALLY apprehensive about vice show at first, especially shows about food. I guess I just didn’t trust that they knew what they were talking about. Boy, was I proven the fuck wrong. Eddie is a fucking G. He really knows his shit, but he’s also really open to learning about the culture where he’s visiting. I think that’s what I enjoy most, how open and respectful he is about where he is. The food they eat is also really great.

A dope episode to start with: I personally loved the episode in Japan.

Where you can watch it: Viceland! (Either Youtube or on cable I guess)

F*ck That’s Delicious

Why it’s good: This is the type of show I actually expected from Viceland. Something raw, lots of cussing, smoking weed and just eating a bunch of food. This show is really all over the place. It’s hard to describe, but that’s also why it’s so fun.

A dope episode to start with: A while back The New Yorker had a great write up about a specific episode which is a really solid one to start with to get a feel for what this show is all about.

Where you can watch it: Viceland probably or maybe on YouTube.

Parts Unknown

I would be remiss if I did not include an Anthony Bourdain show on this list. There are so many good episodes and they’re all good for their own reasons. One of my favorite episodes is Season 8 episode two called Hanoi. This is the episode where he famously interviewed Barack Obama. My other favorite episode is Season 6 Episode 5 titled Bay Area. Because If Bourdain goes to Oakland, I obviously have to know where and what he ate. I was not disappointed!

I will say that the best way to watch Parts Unknown is to go through the seasons and find either the closest place to where you’re from or the most interesting sounding place you’ve always wanted to visit. Whether you know the place well or you don’t know it at all you’re bound to learn a lot of new information.

Weekly Playlist | Hella Long Drives

Published on June 13, 2018, by Stephanie Méndez.

Listen to Hella Long Drives on Apple Music or Spotify.

The Drinking Game | Solo: A Star Wars Story

Published on June 7, 2018, by Ailish Elzy.

I hate spoiling big movies like this. Especially because people have really intense feelings about franchise films. Like really intense. Also, these are the movies you should go into knowing as little as possible so you’re surprised and delighted and your opinion wasn’t influenced by some reviewer’s.

But that’s just my opinion. If you want a review, you can go literally anywhere else. If you want a dope drinking game I got you!!

Drinking Game

Drink…

When something happens that makes you say “Oooooh that’s how they met” or “That’s how he got that” “or “That’s why that’s his name”

When Han tells people he’s a pilot

When you meet a new robot

When Lando mispronounces Han

When you hear a different language

How to Pack for the Movies

Published on June 6, 2018, By Ailish Elzy.

The summer movie season is upon us.

Or has it been upon us for a while now? I’ve heard the summer movies season starts in April now. Or maybe even February? Regardless, school is out, blockbusters are coming and if you wanna stay relevant you gotta get your ass to the theater. Personally, I like to have a good time at the movies, but also, I’m broke as hell so there are specific things I pack when I go. If you wanna turn up or maybe play a drinking game, here’s what you should bring.

A Canvas Shopping Bag

But like a cute one. Like the one you get from your New Yorker subscription or one of the cheap ones you get in the check out at Forever 21. At some theaters, they’re getting real strict about what you can and can’t bring. They hate backpacks and giant purses, but totes they’re chill with. Totes are honestly pretty discreet and the perf size to fit all your snacks/ beer/ wine without looking too bulky or like you’re trying to sneak in a small baby.

Movie Pass

Unless you’re going to Arclight or another theater that hates movie pass with the rage of a thousand suns, this is a must. Also, don’t forget your phone (for the corresponding app). Pro tip: always go straight to the machines to get your ticket. It’s so much faster, plus less human interaction cause that’s not why you went to the movies. If you wanted to talk to more humans you would have sat at the bar at the Islands below the theater.

Beer/ Wine

I love a good drinking game so I always bring booze to the movies. 12 ounce cans of beer are solid, just open them at the right scenes or helicopter moments. Trader Joe’s also makes these delicious wines in a can which are perfect for movies. The juice box wines you can get from Target are a good alternative as well. Fair warning: they’re like three glasses of wine and if you finish it all in a sad movie, you’re very likely to cry. If you got a dope bottle of wine you wanna bring to the theater, don’t bring the actual bottle (that should be obvious) but just put it in a coffee thermos and bring it in that way.

Snacks

I fucking HATE paying $4 for Reese’s I know I can get for 2 for $1 at the Ralphs on the corner so I always bring my own snacks. Usually, a birthday cake bar from Trader Joe’s, some grapes or blueberries if I’m feeling healthy. I don’t suggest anything with a big smell like that time I thought it was chill to bring steamed broccoli and rice to a documentary. Use airplane rules. Also, whole apples are pretty shit for the movies. They’re loud as hell, you have to eat it all at once and you get so much juice on your hands. Bring what you like, but my advice is small and with a quiet packaging so you’re not spending the romantic moments digging through the bottom of a family sized bag of Doritos.

Honestly, you really don’t need that much to have a good time at the movies, just a few key necessities. Now an outdoor movie? That’s a whole different ball game and I’ll cover that in a later blog.

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