New Free Minizine: "Recovering from Reactivity"
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@theowlisthelimit
New Free Minizine: "Recovering from Reactivity"
[[ get a printable and read only version here (it's free) ]]
firm believe that not everything happens for a reason, sometimes things are just cruel. and they shouldn’t have happened and it’s not supposed to be a lesson because we never deserved such thing.
hm some people in my inbox got really mad at this specifically. nothing you can say will convince me that some of the pain and suffering we go through is our “fate” no, it isn’t
I finished a reread of Lady Knight today, and…. Kel really doesn’t know how adored she is, does she?
she’s all chivalry and duty to the crown and practical that she doesn’t realize how her brand of justice and kindness and moral conviction is entirely rare and highly admired.
yes, she makes enemies for it, but the friends she makes stick to her like glue. The ending action in her final book, (along with rescuing Lalasa at the end of Page,) are the MOST pivotal moments in her story, and it’s so funny reading the former from her perspective.
She goes all “lone knight” (which we KNOW she isn’t, she’s a commander, her strength IS her people), because it’s treason, and she can’t put people in danger like that, and it’s her responsibility, not theirs, and her people love her so much they won’t let her do it alone.
she is loved wherever she goes, and her strength: it’s not in the hands of the Chamber, because the little seer girl gives her 50% odd chance of success. It’s not in the gods’ favor, or blessing. It’s not even in her own remarkable iron will and training , though it is instrumental.
Tamora Pierce shows us how deeply Kel’s strength is her kindness, honesty, hardworking nature, and empathy, because it gives her incredible allies. COUNTLESS examples of this throughout the books, but the ending sequence says it all; Kel runs off by herself and immediately
Raoul sends Dom and Dom’s entire squad (who all volunteer.) They go under orders into enemy territory, fine, but
Neal, Esmond, Prosper, and Merric, make plans to follow her. All fresh knights who risk their shields because this is treason. They risk treason, for her. Death or at least dishonor, for her
Tobe, a boy of all of… 10? Who is TERRIFIED of being left behind, has spent his whole life surviving, willingly goes into danger and fights for her.
Owen, who, as it’s said, betrays his duty twice over; to the crown, but also to Wyldon, the night master who (at Kel’s direct request, mind you) saved him from squiredom to a desk night (one of her own worst fears). Wyldon, whose approval means so much to Kel, and especially to Owen.
the ARMY of animals that go with her?
Fanche and Saefus of Haven, who have grown to trust her and refuse to go back to safety without following her lead there.
even the village people of fief Rauthhausek, wary at first, recognize her as being who she says she is, and follow her into battle.
she is a true commander. She takes a burden from every single on to those people, but she doesn’t realize just how much they will carry for her. But they do. Everyone who’s met her is won over, even Wyldon of fucking Cavall, who says he is honored to know her, and that she is a true knight. (His character growth is also fascinating)
I don’t know what I’m saying, but the choice to make Kel a strong leader, whose sense of practically and morality serves her so well, is… so important to me, ya know? Tamora Pierce gives us a world where justice IS a reasonable thing to ask for, and the small and weak SHOULD be protected, and just because something is “tradition” doesn’t mean it’s right.
Watching Tamora Pierce’s writing, and world, and worldview expand over the course of the first three Tortall series has been heartening, and beautiful. Kel’s was actually the first series I read by her, and still, I think, remains my favorite. Another post, but Kel as representation was everything to me.
ANYWAY, TLDR:
Kel is DEEPLY loved and respected by the people around her and that is such a vital strength, and also something she’s not always clued into.
Can we include darebee.com with ao3 and wikipedia on our list of really good nonprofits with excellent services that we stan?
It's a free, no sign-up, no ads fitness resource created by professionals who view this as activism (fitness should be accessible to everyone), and it's very thoughtful and thorough.
Features I really like:
- all instructions for workout routines are diagrammed on single pages with a clean, easy to read layout
- there's 30 or 60 day programs you can follow if you, like me, don't know what to do. they take you through a rotation of workouts so you're working different muscle groups on different day for a specific purpose
- there's so much variety and there's a filter so you can find the level and your goals and type of workout you wanna do
- you don't need any equipment
- some of the programs are RPGs or adventure stories! How's that for motivation. There's also badges and achievements or something but I haven't looked that closely at how that works yet
- they're nerds. they name workouts after D&D classes. There's a Lannistrr workout, a batcave workout, a witcher workout
- I've only scratched the surface
I'm doing this really easy one to start out
Darebee, darebee, fitness, visual workouts, workouts, fitness challenges, fitness motivation, training tips, recipes, nutrition
If you don't understand from the picture they have an Exercise Library playlist in YouTube so you can see what all the moves look like in motion!
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLQSMS0J6JbrKdSOSbyJXaQ_zN_HSSp7zZ
The fastest way to shut down my "freelance life means I have to constantly be working" thoughts is to remind myself that if I was a boss holding a worker to the standards I hold myself to, their union would hunt me for sport and nobody would blame them.
Not me immediately screenshotting this and posting it to the OPP freelance writers chat I'm in
I tell myself: "I'm the owner of the company. But more importantly, I'm also the head of Scriveners Local 23, and I have some demands."
So what that means is that I have a four day work week. I work monday-tuesday and then Thursday-Friday. Fuck the boss if they don't like it.
I have a workplace wellness program that means I can take breaks for yoga, meditation, exercise, and naps.
I have unlimited paid personal days thanks to my project oriented work structure--I get to decide what's the best balance between production and restoration. Fuck the boss if they don't like it.
I have five days each quarter for vacation. attending a convention, conference, expo, bookstore event tour, or a writing workshop *is not a vacation.* that's business-related travel. taking a day or two for a weekend jaunt *is not a vacation.* that's unlimited paid personal days. Five working days. Each Quarter. Vacation. and since I always have wednesdays off, it doesn't count.
I know there's a piece of your brain saying "I have to hustle, I have to hustle"
I know
My brain does that too
And without the union boss in my head, I'll just work until I drop. That's what I did for years. And then I burnt out so bad that this is the first time I have actually made real, noticable progress(1.) similar to my pre-burnout rates in years.
Because the union boss went on strike, and the boss' bottom line was *destroyed.* If I have to crunch now, the union boss enforces recovery time. that's all overtime. but since I don't get paid a wage, I get all that back in time.
The boss never wants to see a strike like that again.
There is power in a union, even if it's only the union in your head.
(1.) only it's not similar. it's half the "speed" of pre-burnout. It's probably my actual true real speed and not my sweatshop labour hustle culture speed. FUCK THE BOSS IF THEY DON'T LIKE IT.
This is outstanding advice for all forms of freelancing.
Target is facing a 40-day consumer boycott starting Wednesday over the company’s shift away from diversity, equity and inclusion (DEI) polic
I wasn't aware of this one, so I'm trying to spread the word.
Black faith leaders have called for a 40-day "fast" from Target for Lent in response to their compliance with Trump's resegregation agenda.
Now this is an effective boycott. It is targeting (ha) a specific company with a clearly stated goal. The amount of time is long enough to be noticed, and could be extended if needed. Anything that can be purchased at Target can also be obtained elsewhere, so it is actually possible to boycott this specific company for a very long time. Target is caving to fascism and rolling back their diversity and inclusion policies. The goal is for them to reverse that decision. This is an achievable goal.
Boycotting everything all at once, for one day or for as long as you can, because everything is terrible and we’re mad about it…does nothing. It’s vague, disorganized, and frankly impossible. We have to buy things sometimes. You can’t just target the economy as a whole. You have to be specific.
If you want to start a boycott, use this one as an example. Choose one target. Provide one (simple, clear, easy to explain) reason why that company deserves to be boycotted. Explain what you want them to do differently. Make sure that it is something that can actually be done. Then tell people about it.
Hey. Your brain needs to de-frag. Literally it needs you to sit there and space out.
If you want your memory or executive function to improve, stare out a window at the skyline or sidewalk or trees or birds on the electrical wires for like 20+ minutes per day. (With no other stimulation like a podcast or TV if you can manage but hey baby steps innit). If you're fortunate enough to have safe outside with any bits of nature, go stare closely at a 1 meter square of grass and trip out on the bugs and shapes of grasses and stuff.
Literally this will make you smarter. Our brains HAVE TO HAVE this zone out time to do important stuff behind the scenes. This does not happen during sleep, it's something else.
That weird pressurized feeling you get sometimes might be your brain on no defrag.
Give your brain a Daily Dose Of De-Frag.
This explains so much.
Also, if you don't take the time regularly, your brain will do it for you. Usually when you're already stressed and it gets to be too much. You will zone out. And you can not control it. So regular maintenance will help
I'm already seeing advice from people in the US to purchase queer books and other banned or "controversial" books on paper as a way to combat the wave of government censorship that is coming. While this is a good idea (it is! absolutely!), it's not accessible to everyone, and truly, we're not going to be able to consumerism our way out of this one.
If you can buy the books, do. Whether you can buy the books or not, borrow them from your library.
Borrow the paper versions. Borrow the ebook or audiobook versions. Request the titles you want that your library doesn't have. The more a title circulates or is requested, the better librarians are going to be able to defend keeping it if and when it's ever challenged.
Use libraries like @queerliblib too. The more members they have, the better they'll be able to fundraise.
Your community resources depend on you using them. Borrow the books before they go away.
InB4: Piracy is not the solution here. We're trying to keep community resources available, not make sure individual people can read individual books. Different problems.
The books are still available. Borrowing them from your library and returning them on time and in good condition will help keep them that way.
This this this!
Libraries and librarians are going to be under attack in the coming years.
Please help us by showing the people in charge that these materials are important in the only way they really understand - the number of checkouts.
We need your help now more than ever.
For some additional context, the Institute of Museum and Library Services (IMLS) is the primary funding mechanism for libraries on a national level. It distributes grants to State Libraries (every state has one, though it may not be called exactly that) who then distribute that money further to individual libraries in their states. It's a federal entity that has to be reauthorized every year or that huge chunk of funding goes away, and every year of the first Trump administration the fight for reauthorization was a white-knuckle event. We got it through by the skin of our teeth each year, but it was harrowing.
Libraries are mentioned on page one of Project 2025's Mandate for Leadership (the big book of horrible policy plans). Choosing not to reauthorize the IMLS will be an easy way for the incoming administration to gut library services nationwide, especially in small communities that don't have a thriving donor base to fill those budget gaps. They'll be able to stop the "porn peddlers" and "groomers" at the cost of vital services to those communities.
One of the best tools we have to try and avoid that outcome is to prove, definitively, that libraries matter by presenting robust use statistics. Checking out books, using library spaces, attending library programs, all of that gets captured and reported to the IMLS each year. They're imperfect measures of the value the library provides to the community, but they're what we have.
At the local level it's going to be just as, if not more important to educate the community about what the library does. Your local governing authorities aren't going to be persuaded by the librarian alone, but they can be persuaded by vocal community support. That will also inoculate your community against "grassroots" attempts to shut the library down, like almost happened in Dayton, Washington in 2023.
To bring it back around to OP's original point, the imperfect nature of the stats gathered can work in libraries' favor on both fronts. It might actually be detrimental to present record-breaking circulation numbers for queer titles to the incoming administration, but the IMLS doesn't collect that level of detail. Any book you check out adds to the bottom line total that gets reported, queer or not. At the local level librarians have more control over the stories they tell with their data. If you're in a progressive community, they can be open with those more granular numbers as a way to underscore their importance as a resource to queer community. If you're in a conservative community they can lean on the bigger picture to show the impact on everyone, while knowing internally what materials are actually circulating and how best to curate the collection to serve their patrons.
Also, checking out books prevents them from being removed from shelves for non-malicious reasons.
Libraries weed their collections routinely so we can continue to have space to add new books. We run a report on the whole collection and books that haven't been circulated in x amount of time get put on the list. We can decide if a book is going to be discarded from there. For example, I won't discard a book if it's part of a series and we have the other books. I also try to avoid discarding award-winning books (especially Stonewall Winners and Honors).
Checking out the books prevents them from going on the weed list in the first place.
If a book does get weeded, it doesn't mean the library has bad intentions. It just means there's no demand for that particular title, and we need the space.
So use your library to check out queer books and other challenged books so that we know they're being read! Keep them well-circulated so we can buy new copies when they get battered and torn rather than removing the title from the collection all together!
As someone recently diagnosed with ADHD as an adult, one thing that’s been helping me grapple with the intense shame I have over all my “wasted potential” is accepting that potential doesn’t exist and never did.
This sounds so harsh, but please bare with me.
I procrastinated a lot growing up. I still procrastinate today, but less so. And yet, I got good grades. I could write an A+ paper that “knocked [my professor]’s socks off” in the hour before class and print it with sweat running down my face.
I was so used to hearing from teachers and family that if I just didn’t procrastinate and worked all the time, I could do anything! I had all this potential I wasn’t living up to!
And that’s true, as far as it goes, but that’s like saying if Usain Bolt just kept going he could be the fastest marathon runner in the world. Why does he stop at the end of the race??
If ANYONE could make their top speed/most productive setting the one they used all the time, anyone could do anything. But you can’t. Your top speed is not a speed you’re able to sustain.
Now, I’ve found that I do need to work on not procrastinating. Not because the product is better, even, but because it’s better for my mental health and physical health to not have a full, sweating, panicked breakdown over every task even if the task itself turns out excellently. It’s a shitty way to live! You feel bad ALL the time! And I don’t deserve to live like that anymore.
So all of this to say, I’m not wasting a ton of potential. I don’t have an ocean of productivity and accomplishments inside of me that I could easily, effortlessly access if I just sat down 8 hours a day and worked. There’s no fucking way. That’s not real. It’s an illusion. It’s fine not to live up to an illusion.
And if you have ADHD, I mean this from the bottom of my heart: you do not have limitless potential confounded by your laziness. You have the good potential of a good person, and you can access it with practice and work, but do not accept the story that you are choosing not to be all that you are or can be. You are just a human person.
“This thing is legally dubious and therefore technically unenforceable.” Is not a “useless liberal gotcha” it’s how legalism works in this country. Tying up stupidly worded EOs in court is the quickest way to keep them from being implemented. It is the definition of “doing something.” But it doesn’t usually involve much tweeting so of course a certain type of leftist feels obligated to mock it.
#challenging an EO in court keeps it from being implemented for a very long time and that’s a good thing#not only does it *not get implemented* for usually at least a year as it gets appealed over and over again#it also distracts conservative resources from going full steam ahead because they have to dedicate resources to defending their bullshit in#and the dumber their bullshit is the longer it takes to defend and the less they can get done#this is materially good so yes saying ‘this EO is poorly worded and can be interpreted to mean that all people are now female’#is a valid point to make
op's tags were worth preserving
A series of posts from the Alt National Parks Page regarding Elon Musks take over.
Reuters is backing up the report.
Link to the Wired article too
Signal boost the FUCK out of this. Direct action is planned for this afternoon outside the building Musk's goons are currently occupying.
This is why I get so tired about “whose a real women” and “are transgender people real” and the like because it’s so irrelevant. We have group or people that have an insane suicide rate and we have a solution that reduces that by an insane amount.
No matter how you slice it no theoretical reason nor gender rhetoric can change the gender affirming care is improving more lives than it’ll ever hurt
i think this belongs here too
all the statistics are massively in favor of gender affirming care no matter how you slice it.
this is going to be difficult -> i am capable of doing difficult things -> i have done everything prior to this moment -> this difficulty will soon be proof of capability
this difficulty will soon be proof of capability.
THE RULES FOR ELECTION WEEK:
1. EAT
2. HYDRATE
3. PUT DOWN YOUR PHONE REGULARLY
4. TAKE A WALK / MOVE YOUR BODY
5. USE DISTRACTIONS FREQUENTLY (MUSIC, TV SHOWS, BOOKS, ETC)
6. SET A TIMER FOR WHEN YOU DOOMSCROLL AND THEN STOP DOOMSCROLLING WHEN IT BEEPS
7. SERIOUSLY GO EAT SOMETHING
8. TRY NOT TO GET ALCOHOL POISONING
9. BREATHE
this book is so funny my mans costis just getting fucked left right and center
Thinking about indulging in masochism as a positive part of play. Like so often I see people talking about a sub getting hit for disobedience or failing to do something or even as just a passive thing that happens and like sure that has its place. But like what about a sub doing a good job so they can earn getting flogged? Warning a brat that you won't bite them for the rest of the night if they keep up the attitude. Offering to beat someone until they're crying as motivation for them to get all their work done? What if the violence was full of love? What if I want your skin to show the world how much I love and care for you?