You’re a good man Jean Moreau

Laz | gay | cis f | ao3 lazarusthefirst | jerejean brainrot

[catsbeaversandducks]

Art by Jesse Jarldane

[ryebreadgf]

oh I know her well we went to 2014 together

[picsthatmakeyougohmm]

[anaxaver]

the miracle of life

[wyrmicelli]

me tongue-deep in a sandalwood candle: 🤤

the tjmaxx employee loading a fourth tranquilizer dart into their blowgun: i need backup

[snowown]

[belladonnabedlam]

Okay. I was on my beloved AO3 and I saw something that made me do a double take. So, now I really want to know…

What is your AO3 user ID?

I’m an OG user 5 digits or less

Six figures baby!

I’m in the millions…

Remaining time: 1 day 4 hours

I’m so curious to see how long people have been on AO3! I know some people have been on there since beta/invite only, but I would love to see what the number is on tumblr!

[ozempicofficial]

[fiercestpurpose]

There’s a quality that certain books/movies/TV shows have that leads me to say, “Yeah, I can see people making fanfiction of that.” It’s something to do, I think, with how tight the story is, how much feels open-ended or like it could be elaborated on.

Something like Breaking Bad, for example, has low squiggability (that’s what I’m calling this quality). It’s tightly written, the characters are consistent, there’s little left to interpolate or extrapolate. Obviously, people DO write fanfic of Breaking Bad, but it still has a low squiggability score. Whereas something like Supernatural has a high squiggability score. Fantasy and science fiction often have high squiggability scores. This suggests squiggability could also be related to worldbuilding and potential for people to borrow a premise or setting.

And sometimes you’ll read or watch something and you’ll say, “Ah, low squiggability,” and then you’ll open tumblr and find out that everyone else seem to think its squiggability was very high indeed.

[scatter-brain-at-work]

worse is sometimes you think ahh high squiggability and you open ao3/Tumblr and there's only 3 other people muttering about it.

[swarnpert]

NO MORE SONGS UNDER 3 MINUTES. GO BACK INTO THE STUDIO

[wholesome-animal-images]

[spatort]

@sinnsenke couldn't leave this in the tags

[sandersstudies]

Hey you can’t really like. Do anything about somebody perceiving your behavior as rude. Like they’re not telling you you’re doing something illegal they’re just saying hey you’re kinda being a shithead. It’s not discrimination or oppression for somebody to tell you you’re acting like a shithead rn.

[sandersstudies]

“Wahhh why can’t I blare my TikToks in a shared public space!”

You CAN dude. In fact you ARE. You’re just going to be perceived as kinda shitty for it.

[moonmargaritas]

I’m pretty sure this is also the same kind of person who is physically compelled to get on someone else’s post and explain why THEY PERSONALLY have the One Correct Reason to not listen to rap or eat at Chik-fil-A or use ChatGPT or or or or. They obsessively crave universal validation so they don’t have to confront the fact that their actions have consequences and also say things about their character.

[maybeasunflower]

There is a really huge gap between "illegal" and "socially unacceptable". It's actually a mark of a free society that people can legally do things that don't cause significant harm to others, even though most people hate those things. Examples include cheating on your spouse and playing TikTok videos loudly in public spaces.

[slugg]

Hello Billy. Papa is out of the evil warehouse today. Before you is a set of colored pencils, a book of shapes and numbers, and a coloring book consisting of gruesome depictions of my best traps. You may also watch some television. There is orange juice and leftovers in the fridge which you must finish in 12 hours, or else they will go bad. Love you son

[elene78-blog]

I love that Jeremy is so firm. We often overlook it, thinking he's kind and sweet and all that… but damn, this guy has a tough and strong character.

[mothcub]

"hot girls do this" "hot girls do that" you bore me. ugly and cold women rise

[kaelio]

[nyanakin]

we have got to get real porn back on this site

[kaelio]

[sexhaver]

[beemovieerotica]

[biteybeast]

[wendydoodles]

[notahorseindisguise]

ALSO..some more masturbation facts about me. theres a nonsexual scene in a book where a kid gets spanked for some reason. it was set in like the 40s and he was in a boarding school i forget. but i think i either misread the scene . or maybr the author actually did write this and theyre just fucking weird. and i thought the protag got hit (with like a ruler or something). on the penis instead of on the arse. and i remember my 11 year old brain being like. i wonder why i think that would feel good.

and so my first ever "experiment" with masturbation was. slapping my dick with a ruler. and when that felt good. my first ever way of masturbating was. stacking heavy books on my penis. and then hitting the top book. so that the force was distributed down the series of books. into my penis. and of COURSE it didnt work i was punching books into my dick but it laid a strong foundation for a great gooning career . hey everyone PLEASE pretend you didnt read this post

[notahorseindisguise]