Welcome to my twisted meme

27, he/him. Message me if you need anything tagged. DNI if you expect me to read a long ass DNI.

[niceinchnails]

[lesvegas]

passing in public makes me feel like white shrek

[lesvegas]

literally how it feels

[welpnotagain]

[wakingfromthewater]

This was shared as a "bad" joke but I was so charmed by it I've been thinking about it for days.

[artistic-octopus]

[wordswithkittywitch]

Moose at the next table: No they don't. I've been waiting here for an hour.

[totally-not-an-al1en]

[valenalentine]

[definetleynotapornbot]

Your account was hacjed and the only way to get the password back is to give me your password olease

[bisexualbaker]

Happy Moon Landing Eve! Remember to leave out milk and cookies for Buzz Aldrin and Neil Armstrong, and don’t let Michael Collins convince you to prank NASA!

[bisexualbaker]

If Tumblr is still here next July 19th, I fully expect this post to obliterate my activity feed.

[kineticpenguin]

misunderstanding the significance of bodily fluids: "I have spilled so much pee in the name of my country"

[gunsandfireandshit]

[crystalline-clangen]

why the fuck do people hate trans men so much?? why do i keep seeing people say “you can tell trans men think they deserve to live” on a regular basis and nobody bats an eye?? do you realize you are discriminating against an entire demographic of people?? do you think mtf is the only type of trans allowed to exist?? what the fuck is wrong with you??

[innerchildabortionclinic]

interesting kink assortment on the dash

[orcboxer]

After a 5 year hiatus, national embarrassment Conor McGregor debuts in his own mma tournament called World's Baddest Man and his very first move is to blow out his knee and collapse to the ground

[orcboxer]

[this-is-trans-joy]

I’m more than a little concerned at seeing recommended tumblr communities with names like “queer teens” or “nonbinary teens” and advertising themselves as a space for teenagers as young as 13 to make friends with each other. I don’t wanna sound like anyone’s dad here, but this is… not safe. Anyone can join those communities, they’re not private unless you make it private. You can’t trust that everyone in there is actually a teenager, so please don’t advertise your age or other people’s ages like that in online spaces. You can absolutely make private communities or discord servers with trusted friends, but not public communities that anyone can join, especially if those communities are specifically targeted at marginalised— and therefore vulnerable— teenagers.

[scheidungsgrund]

from twitter user deejaygeejaygee

[galecstatic]

it just gets better

and better

[goingonanadventuremaybe]

[funnyfroge]

[elierlick]

The juxtaposition of these tweets...

[death-420]

does anyone have that gif of a penis growth ad thats a guinea pig that stretches out rly long and a girl says “hot!” and the guinea pig spins around pls i need it

[raeuberkotzenrotz]

I gotchu

[death-420]

YES!!! YES!! YES!!!!!

[doomstar]

You literally cannot find this type of community interaction on twitter or instagram or any other app. Look at the support, the gratitude, the absolutely incomprehensible shared knowledge of this most cursed, most rare gif. 

Truly this is beauty.

[kaylmao]

idk i would personally rather give up access to certain products seasonally or locally than have people enslaved to give me the ability to have any product any place any time. i think i can go without tomatoes in january.

[kaylmao]

i truly do think that most people if confronted with it and pressed on it would agree. but it's comfortable to gain privileges from someone else's suffering, especially if you don't have to see that suffering directly.

[tarragonthedragon]

i just got the "see where your blood has gone!" email from giving blood but it glitched and just showed me my current location. which. theyre not wrong. that is where most of my blood is