Marly

ion even know anymore

[illinicoise]

“But if you forget to reblog Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.”

[spn-fandom-breathing-heavily]

not even risking that shit

[codyslipring-deactivated2015060]

scrolled past this, re-evaluated my life, then SCROOOLLLED back up and hit the damn reblog button. 

[tumblgang]

She ain’t no games in real life so I take her serious all the time

Anyone with a name that starts with a “Z”, ends with an “i”, and isn’t some kind of Italian pasta, IS SERIOUS

I’m not climbing no mountain with a pig on my back, 🙅🏽🙅🏾🙅🏿 Negative.

[skuubasally]

Nope. I know better, have your reblog Madame Zeroni.

[luckytaters]

who the fuck is Madame Zeroni

[saudadesinfinitas-deactivated20]

Look at these stupid children who don’t know who Madame Zeroni is

[drayaintshit-deactivated2019030]

☝🏾😂

[callmedeku24]

Man lissen if you don’t know you better ask somebody AFTER you hit the reblog button

[emeraldmercury]

Idk who she is but I have an exam today so I’ll reblog her

[haiku-robot]

idk who she is but i have an exam today so i’ll reblog her

^Haiku^bot^0.4. Sometimes I do stupid things (but I have improved with syllables!). Beep-boop!

[jacobmick]

Because wise, I am.

[seymonecristina]

Oh fucks no she’s back lmao must reblog. I’m sorry guys

[blackgirlart]

2 million people aren’t wrong

[serosinkyslut]

Realistic X-rays of Class 1- A!! Part 2

Part 1 | Part 2

Aoyama

- Shiny✨

- This isn’t related to his length but his asshole is spotless

- Squeaky clean

- Does this nigga exfoliate his balls?? He’s literally so smooth

- Similar to Denki, he’s not very big

- I’d give him 4.8 inches

- That’s okay I’ll just get the strap

Ojiro

- It’s big. Oh I know it’s big

- Almost at Kiri’s length; 8.2 inches

- Monochrome too, his skin is perfectly even all throughout

- If he does have some hair, it’s kept at a minimum

- His balls are really appealing??

Momo

- Yeah this girl is hairless

- Premium Brazillian waxes. She has the money so

- Surprisingly a little dark. Scratch that, it’s very dark

- She also has an itty bitty, but gets really puffy after (an during) the deed

- She has a big clit. Like, actually big. No debate

Kouda

- I can’t imagine this guy with a dick idk

Satou

- A big guy, but his penis doesn’t quite follow suit

- 5.3 maximum

- He eats like hell but it just fuels his quirk, not his cock

- But don’t be fooled, CUZ WE GOT A THICK BOI HERE

- The girth is astronomical

- When he slaps that thang on your tongue it's got some weight to it

Shouji

- Horse

- Cock

- .

- 9.3 inches with BODYODY

- Shit fucking hangs

- Do not let this man out of the house with grey sweatpants

- Two shades darker than the rest of his body

- Almost purple looking at the base, a tad lighter at the top, but definitely not pink

- Has the perfect amount of thickness

Jirou

- Another squirter 🎉

- Teeny weeny

- She has a very small and smooth pussy

- Either has no hair or a whole bush, no in between

- Gets turned on soo fast

Tokoyami

- This one was hard (thanks to @shoutoswhore for the help)

- Hmm 6 inches give or take a lil

- For sure has some hair down there

- A little bulky

- He has veins that showww, he’s actually a little insecure about them but little does he know…

Uraraka

- The anime doesn’t do her justice.

- She’s a thick girl with a thick ass pussy and the thighs to match

- Full lips ofc

- Dark like Momo w some beef curtains😩

- I can just picture it now

- This might be a surprised but she actually has a small clit that isn’t very sensitive, takes her a while to get worked up

- Nipple play gets her going💥

Hagakure

- Um

And lastly, because he’s a fucking asshole, Mineta

- Micropenis.

- Even if I didn’t hate him, it’d still be the same

- 1 inch, 2 inches at best

- And that’s pushing it

- Fuck him. And not in the good way

[futuremoji]

Your sixth most recent emoji is how your guardian angel feels about you

[futuremoji]

[pugsies]

PLEASE READ. WILL NOT HURT TO AND FORWARD. Kids are putting Drano, tin foil, and a little water in plastic drink bottles and capping it up - leaving it on lawns, in mail boxes, in gardens, on driveways etc. just waiting for you to pick it up intending to put it in the rubbish, but you’ll never make it!!!

If the bottle is picked up, and the bottle is shaken even just a little - in about 30 seconds or less it builds up enough gas which then explodes with enough force to remove some your extremities. The liquid that comes out is boiling hot as well. Don’t pick up any plastic bottles that may be lying in your yards or in the gutter, etc. Pay attention to this. A plastic bottle with a cap. A little Drano. A little water. A small piece of foil. Disturb it by moving it; and BOOM!! No fingers left and other serious effects to your face, eyes, etc. Please ensure that everyone that may not have email access are also informed of this. 

Snopes confirms.

[geometricdeathtrap-deactivated2]

I’ve dealt with these before. If you find one:

Do not touch it

Do not touch it

Clear the area around it. It will explode on its own in time.

Once it explodes, do not make contact with the liquid inside. If needed, flush it away with large amounts of water.

Do not try to detonate it. You’ll probably be disfigured.

I’ve seen what these can do. The acidic liquid inside can strip the paint off a car.

[chaplip]

when i visited vancouver these were everywhere. it’s not a fucking joke they’re actually scary

[zzazu]

Just a reminder that there are awful shitty people out there doing awful shitty things to everyone else

[pastel-wendigo]

there was a bunch of these at disneyland

[xakariahthepariah-deactivated20]

i found one in my back yard, when i let my dogs out, i pulled them back inside, took my cousins bb shotgun and shot it from a safe distance (i was in my house and shot from the screen door. When it went off, my family and neighbors came running to see if everything was ok. I told them what happened and to watch out for them. 

These things are not a joke! When we went to check the damage there was a fucking hole in the ground. The dirt in my yard is like CLAY.

This shit is bad news

[sparklefairydust-blog]

PLEASE DON’T BE AN ASSHAT. PLEASE DON’T LEAVE BOMBS IN PEOPLE’S YARDS.

[youkofujima]

Please spread this information!

[herongale]

the one fucking time I actually will signal boost cuz I didn’t know about this and would never ever wanna learn about it first hand

[mochitits]

we actually had the bomb squad called to our house for something like this and it totally ruined the paint on my big bro’s car.  :c

[h-cilantro]

@takashi0

[takashi0]

Shared before, but sharing again.

[cvs-store]

this isnt my blog type but its really important

[otomeboyimagines]

Please be aware and be careful. These can harm people, pets, property and wildlife.

If you see one, keep your distance and wait for it to go off on its own.

My brother delt with one by putting a large metal bowl over it, but that’s extremely dangerous as well.

Be safe please.

[josephinesrphub]

SIGNAL BOOST. I HAVEN’T SEEN THESE BUT WILL KEEP A LOOK OUT.

[meme-intern-of-shield]

[My chemistry professor told us about these this week because we’ve been learning about the main ingredient in Draino, Sodium Hydroxide.]

[spiderrrling]

I am a(n):

⚪ Male

⚪ Female

🔘 Writer

Looking for

⚪ Boyfriend

⚪ Girlfriend

🔘 An incredibly specific word that I can't remember

[what-even-is-thiss]

*wakes up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat*

WAIT IT’S CALLED A THROW PILLOW

[holorifle]

here is a super helpful website for this kinda thing!

the first result isn’t always the one you’re looking for but when you press enter it’ll give you a ton of words related to your query that’ll probably have what you’re wanting, or something better

here’s some examples:

[anchored-in-high-tide]

Reblog to save a writer’s sanity (the last bit that’s left)

[immabethehero]

A life saver!!! Thank you!!!!

[radiolightning]

In case anyone is having a bad night:

Here is the fudgiest brownie in a mug recipe I’ve found

Here are some fun sites

Here is a master post of Adventure Time episodes and comics

Here is a master post of movies including Disney and Studio Ghibli

Here is a master post of other master posts to TV shows and movies

*tucks you in with fuzzy blanket* *pats your head*

You’ll be okay, friend <3

[meanwolfs-remade-deactivated201]

i will reblog this everytime it shows up because any of my followers could have a bad night right now

[becausewhatiam-iswhatimnot]

All these links, besides the first, are broken. So here’s some more.

Here’s an emergency compliment

Here you can play 2048

Here’s a playlist of Bob ross

Here’s a website to watch movie’s and shows for free

Here’s a website to watch documentaries for free

Here you can to nothing for two minutes

Here you can break something. It’s good for anger

Here’s a button to press to make everything okay

Here’s a site to cut something up (TRIGGER WARNING)

Here’s a site that makes you a website depending on a song you choose

Here’s a gay comic. It’s adorable

Here you can spend Bill Gate’s money

Here you can draw your own island

Here you can learn about patterns website’s use

Here you can get your life stats

Here you can listen to the Tucker Zone (Headphones needed)

Here you can see how fast you’re moving

Here you can see the progress of time

Here you can see the future of the universe 

[becausewhatiam-iswhatimnot]

Want some more? 

Here’s the butterfly project

Here’s a snickerdoodle mug cake

Here’s a link to some free audiobooks

Here’s something to read when you feel like a burden

Here’s a secret

Here’s my playlist of some sea shanties 

Here’s another secret

Here’s a link to some cool websites 

Here’s a blog that gives you recipes for when you’re low on spoons

Here’s some Brony Headcanon’s

[becausewhatiam-iswhatimnot]

Some more? I’ve got plenty

Here’s 100,000 stars

Here you can control the weather (TW FLASHING IMAGES)

Here you can weave silk

Here you can make a castle of your own

Here you can make a kaleidoscope drawing

Here you can explore recursion

Here you can play a jelly block game

[becausewhatiam-iswhatimnot]

I’m back with some more! 

Here you can draw with pasta

Here you can draw logo’s from memory

Here you can play this is sand, here you draw cool sand designs

Here you can play The Organ Trail

Here’s a customizable white noise website

Here you can simulate gravity

Here you can create your own guardian of the galaxy

Here you can make your own galaxy

Here’s a website you can get some support at.

[becausewhatiam-iswhatimnot]

to find later

[crazy-rich-asians]

“my child is fine” your child obsesses over non-existant fictional characters all day and night long.

[thotivities]

I’m in this, and I don’t like that

[serosinkyslut]

Sero NSFW Alphabet

Honestly, I’m just a tad addicted to character nsfw alphabets, and I simp for Sero so this was bound to happen. REBLOG GUYS SERO NEEDS MORE APPRECIATION

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

- Sero is a literal angel when it comes for aftercare

- He loves you so much, and tries his best to make sure you’re comfortable

- Anything you want, he’s got it

- Towels to wipe you down afterward? Check

- A gigantic water bottle the width of both of your heads put together that you didn’t even know existed? Check

- Where the hell does he get these?

- Warm oil to massage you? Check

- A somehow already hot bath running literally two minutes after you said you wanted to bathe? Check

- He secretly does it so that he has an excuse to shower with you. It saves water right?

- Like I said, an angel

B = Body Part (their fav body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

- Sero adores everything about you.

- While he is an ass>boobs kinda guy, Sero loves your thighs

- Scratch that, he worships them. He does anything just to feel them- biting, pinching, licking, grabbing, sucking

- He loves how soft and squeezable they are, how they look in those terribly enticing shorts you wear

- Don’t even get me started on thigh jobs

- When he eats you out, this man is in absolute bliss. Your thighs clenching around his head on top of those adorable whimpers? Yes

- Sero doesn’t really have a favorite body part, but it’d probably be his hair (yeah, ik that’s not really a body part so to speak but)

- He just thinks it’s fun to take care of- this is also how he knows so much about taking care of your hair too. Wash days are so much easier with Sero around to help you. Latin King, we stan

- Plus the feeling of you tugging at his roots while he gives you head is

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

- Sero’s cum isn’t dark and hardly salty

- This man eats like a fitness trainer, even before becoming a pro hero

- Not super thick, just a tadddd translucent, very sticky

- He’d cum anywhere you tell him, nothing is off limits

- Ass, back, stomach, thighs, anything. He always asks for permission ofc. Such a gentle man. Really wants to see his load on you. Makes him feel like your his

- Makes sure to double check if it’s okay to let it out on your face. Could it be bad for your skin?

D= Dirty Secret (obvi)

- Before you two started dating, he once masturbated to an audio of your voice

- You had sent a voice message to tell him some crazy story about Denki and a toaster. Accidentally bumping into the counter, you let out a soft “ohhh fuck”

- While it wasn’t sexual at all, Sero couldn’t help but let his mind wander

- When you guys finished talking, he replayed it a few times just to hear that sweet, sweet moan again

- In hindsight, he feels horrible about it

- He’s not a pervert right? Is that normal? Would you break up with him if you found out?

- He also secretly keeps some of your clothing at his apartment. He just really misses you okay? The smell of you is comforting

- Jacks off to your smell when you go on business trips

E = Experience (how experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

- Sero doesn’t have much experience, maybe one or two partners before you tops

- But on everything I love, this man could be a sex specialist in his past life

- Shit, he could be one in this life

- He’s an expert at reading you and want you want, sexually and emotionally

- Every movement, groan, smile, and squelch Sero takes into consideration

- He lives to please you, and makes sure you finish before him at least once every session

- This man knows exactly what he’s doing

F = Favorite position (obvi)

- How could he ever choose??

- Your ass looks perfect doggy style, he could cum just looking at your lewd face missionary, your hips feel amazing when he grabs them as you ride him, your hard nipples bouncing in his face in cowgirl is sinful, oh but the curve of your back in reverse cowgirl, holy- the way your nails dig into his shoulders when he fucks you in the air, the heat from your body pressed flush against him while he spoons you, how his fingers practically sink into you when the two of you tried the butterfly that one day, and-

- Basically

- You. You’re Sero’s favorite sex position.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? Are they humorous? Etc)

- Come on guys. Jokes for dayyss

- Sero is constantly messing around with you, and teasing you in the most lovable way

- Can switch from sadistic dom to playful lover like *snaps fingers* that

- Sometimes you seriously wonder if he has a split personality

- You could care less, though, ‘cause right after he’s pleasing you ‘till you cry

- He becomes an actual CLOWN when he made you laugh while he was inside you. Cockwarming and chill had lead to one thing or another when your walls clenched so hard around his already pulsing cock that he almost came from the stimulation

- Just know, that night you were dry heaving from laughter

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes?)

- Sero is pretty well groomed

- His hair is almost always trimmed, but thinks about growing it out occasionally when you told him it tickled your clit

- Keeps the hair to a minimum, sometimes even goes completely bald

- Mmmm his treasure trail is delicious

- Does the carpet match the drapes? Mostly yeah

- To your surprise, the hair is not jet black like the strands on his head, but has a slight blue hue to it

- Sero’s hygiene is A1 so you know this man never lets it grow too long, he even combs it. Bush 🚫

- Loves to keep himself clean and crisp, especially for his princess

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? The romantic aspect)

- This goes without saying but Sero is the most intimate, most passionate, most sensual person you’d ever meet

- He’s big on praise

- Always whispering sweet nothings into your ear

- ^or screaming :)

- PRAISES YOU IN SPANISH OF COURSE

- “Oh hermosa you feel amazing” /// “Fuck yes Princesa. Keep going just like that”

- And of course the ooey gooey sappy romance that usually accompanies a blunt or two. Or three. Maybe 4

- “Tienes los ojos más bonitos del mundo” (you have the prettiest eyes in the world) ///“Estoy desesperadamente enamorado de ti” (I’m hopelessly in love with you)

- Definitely a sentimental stoner

- Don’t forget for even a moment that even though Sero is a cheesy romantic, he knows how to shake it up

- Sadist Sero uses nipple clamps and slaps your gorgeous ass raw

- Nevertheless, fucking always comes with some praise. He’s just immaculate

J = Jackoff (masturbation headcanon)

- tbh he doesn’t masturbate much

- Beating his dick is so blasé now that he has you

- Why would he need to?

- Porn doesn’t really turn him on… they’re just not you

- And the sex industry is just so unrealistic

- I mean, who moans like that? That orgasm was so fake it's painful

- Only watches porn to see if there’s something new he’d try with you

- You’re all he needs. His whole universe

- When you need to leave town for a few days, he is desperate

- Dry humps the pillow on your side of his bed while playing your favorite song and sniffing your underwear desperate

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

- Alright here we go

- BDSM. His tape is a given ofc. Loves to tie you up, loves being tied up

- P r a i s e! If you tell him he’s making you feel good he is gone. Compliment him on how sexy he looks in a suit and he’s giving you dumb sloppy toppy every day for the rest of the week. Needs you to know you're appreciated

- Food play. I read a fic like this from @wonderwomanfantasy [y’all seriously go check out her kinktober list and Sero fics, they are gifts from above] and I can’t get it out of my head

- SERO HAS A SPIT KINK IDC IDCCCC He likes to spit on your face, in your mouth, in between your tits and watch it drizzle down your body, spit on that pretty little pussy of yours and taste you, swirling the muscle on your clit before dipping his tongue in. NOW THAT’S SOME GOOD FUCKING FOOD

- Speaking of which~ UGH giving you head turns him on. Knowing he’s the one that’s making you feel good makes his chest puff up so big I swear

- Hair pulling. Why he gets so fucking hard and throbbing when you pull his hair, I don’t know. But he does. Will let you pull the shit out of his scalp if you wanted

- Sliiiiigghhhttt dumbification/ degradation kink (him being the recipient). You are so sexy when you put him in his place

- Ya already know this man goes gaga for thighs. Thigh kink. Is that a thing? Well, it’s his thing

L = Location (favorite place to do the do)

- Sero likes to take his time with you so he prefers his bedroom

- He just liked the feeling of you being in his presence

- It’s more comfortable there too. We know his house is cozy af

- As stated before in aftercare, his place has all the tools to treat you right

- Really getting into hammock sex

M = Motivation (what turns them on, what gets them going)

- Sigh. You. Just you.

- You wearing his clothes

- You in those goddam shorts

- You cooking (food kink duh)

- You sleeping next to him

- ^Gets shameful boners looking at your sleeping face

- You hugging his waste

- You being uncharacteristically clumsy and tripping over your own shoe laces. So cute

- I don’t know how many ways I can say this. He’s whipped

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

- Pet play. He really just doesn’t get it. Why would you want to be another animal? We’re already mammals as it is

- Slave play. You’re his goddess. He’s never treat you like anything less than that. Other role play is an exception, but no.

- Cuckolding. He absolutely refuses to share you. My clingy boy needs all your love. The thought of someone else loving you makes his skin crawl. What if you like the other guy or girl better than him? His heart would be broken into the ittiest, bittiest pieces

- Spit and squinting are on the table (it’s just “love juice”), but golden showers are nowhere near the table. Or the room. Not even in the same neighborhood

- Extreme degradation, or even moderate. Why would he say something so hurtful?? He’s okay with cumslut and whore, but saying you're a worthless piece of garbage that only wants to get her pussy wet?? He can't even imagine

- ^Wait, I’m totally using that in a different fic-

O = Oral (preference for giving or receiving, skill, etc)

- STOP PLAYING WITH ME

- You already knoowww papi prefers to give

- Naturally, your blow jobs nearly make him pass out, but the way you spasm around his tongue and fingers? Squirt your hot juice on his face? Moan and scream so loudly while pulling his hair and clenching those sexy ass things??? The way you call out his name like he’s the best man in the whole universe????

- Your smell is so intoxicating

- When he’s high, he’s eating you out for hours, no question

- His tongue. Lord he is sinful with that tongue. Kitten licks on your clit, long strips across your things, soft love bites on your pelvis.

- A sudden finger will end up in your ass so he can see your beautiful body squirm with his touch

- How you look all hot and bothered when you stare down at him is priceless

- Yes, 69 is eye crossing, but he favors you just sitting on his face so he can focus on pleasuring you, feel you gasping and trembling because of him

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual?)

- Hmmm this is kinda tough

- Depends on his mood, depends on your mood

- The correct answer is all of the above

- Sometimes he’s pounding you so damn hard and rough the smack on his balls against your asshole leaves a bruise. You wake up with handprints on your boobs + your body littered in teeth marks, scratches, rope lines, and red gashes from the riding crop. Don’t you dare try to get up in the morning, you will immediately fail to walk

- Other times he is very much tender. Extremely slow, making you beg for more. He’ll trail his feather light fingers oh so slowly across your limbs, blowing cold air across your nipples

- What can I say? He’s a well rounded typa guy

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc)

- Whenever and whatever you want, Sero is down for it

- Sure, he’d rather fuck you in his own bed, but he’d dick you down before, and during, a family function that starts in less than an hour

- Quickies have become more frequent now that he’s a pro hero and it makes him a little sad

- But could easily make you cum in 10 minutes

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? Do they take risks?)

- Very much an experimentalist

- Baby just wants to make you feel good

- 10/10 would get out of his comfort zone to try basically anything once

- If you like it, he’d probably love it

- You already know what he wouldn’t try, you guys have sat down and talked about everything both you and him don’t tolerate

- G e n t l e m a n

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? How long do they last?)

- King of stamina, but would never push your limits. Well-

- He wouldn’t without consent. Does that make sense?

- Lasts a maximum of 6 rounds

- Shortest time he’s taken to cum: 4 minutes

- You’re just so beautiful

- Yes he was high at the time, shhhh

- Don’t worry though, he will take good care of you even then

- Overstimulation is a thing for him. Even after cuming multiple times, the feeling of his sensitive cock shooting a million electric bolts down his spine is yummy

- Even after he’s dirt tired, he’ll continue with slow, lazy drags into your cunt

- Your gummy walls are begging him for some friction

- His dick is already limp af but he pretends not to notice

- Just a little bit longer

- There isn’t a time range for how long these rounds may last, mans is full of surprises

T = Toys (do they own toys? Do they use them on a partner or themselves?)

- Bought a variety of sex toys when the two of you started getting serious

- Always comes prepared

- Mostly everything is for you

- A long purple dildo, two vibrators (in case one dies mid session), velvet handcuffs, a gag, nipple clamps, butt plug, some ropes (sometimes his tape is just too sticky), riding crop, aphrodisiac, blind folds, clit sucker, a blanket? Lube for days, hella condoms, and even 2 emergency blunts

- He has ONE item that he actually bought for himself. It’s a vibrating dick ring!

- Keeps everything in a special drawer called the “treasure box”

- Locked with a key that only you have. Bring that key to his house and it’s going down

- Little does Sero know, you always keep it with you in your purse

- Clearly, he didn’t buy so much stuff just to not use them

- Let’s you use whatever you want on him. Lately you’ve been insinuating you’d like to peg him… he can’t tell if he’s nervous or excited

- Uses the toys when feeling frisky, but especially on special occasions

- On your birthday, he makes you cry from pleasure

- Borderline torture play

- Cooes encouragement when he senses the tears coming

- “Ohh yes baby you’re doing so well” /// “Your legs are shaking love, it feels good, doesn’t it? Hm?” /// “Stick out that tongue so I can kiss you. I’ll make you feel good mi amour”

U = Unfair (how much do they like to tease?)

- Pfttt

- Can I get a harder question please?

- Edges you to no end

- Teasing in public is a yes

- Pinches your ass playfully in front of anyone. 0 shame

- Flicks your tit when no one is watching, earning him an irritated scowl

- You’re hot when you're angry

- Sero is slick as silk, speaks in the most romantic/sexual ways

- Sometimes teases you without even knowing he’s doing it

- Kisses that tender spot behind your ear, draws shapes on your back, rubs your thighs like it’s the most natural thing in the world

- And it is

- “Does this feel good, mi cielito?” “Do you want more?”

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc)

- Sero is a pretty vocal guy, very secure in his masculinity

- Will moan in your ear like the little bitch he is

- He can’t help but hiss and groan loudly when you stroke his length

- Practically yells at you to cum on his face. He can’t get enough

- 60% of the time, there’s just soft, low grunts and deep growls

- Plus he’s a sweet talker, and sweet talking is typically more quiet

- He steadily increases in volume when he’s close to cuming, it’s literally impossible to control himself while his hips are stuttering balls deep in you

- At those times, strings of words are incoherent, he doesn’t know what he’s saying, babbles, a pathetic stuttering mess and has no recollection of what was said after

- A puddle of mud if you play with his nipples

W = Wild card (miscellaneous section)

- 1000000000% switch. No one can tell me that this man doesn’t love to be dominated. Tie him up and ride him, kiss him and play with his nipples. Long, hot ropes of cum are guaranteed

- Oh how the turn tables

- If you ever got pregnant, he’s totally sucking some milk outta those titties

- Call him papi :)))) he’ll ascend

- AU Sero with a tongue piercing drives me insane

- He loves to say that consent is sexy

- Love language: words of affirmation, physical touch, gifts ;;; in that order. He’s pretty much the CEO of communication

- Likes to keep it inside you after cuming, at least until he gets soft. Will pull out painfully slowly and watch is drip out of your perfect cunny

- I love a humming Sero. There’s just something about it

- Lots of PDA without being gross about it. Lots of casual kisses and always touching you

- Has a thing for bigger (*cough cough* Black) girls

- Dreams of being a father to your kid. Doesn’t really have a breeding kink tho

- Likes voyeurism more than he admits. It’s okay bb, we love you for it

- Doesn’t really like to swallow or have you swallow. He wants to see you drenched in his essence

- Bi curious

- Please please please SIT ON HIS LAP. He wants you as close as possible. Even casual touch is addicting

X = X- ray (let’s see what’s going on under them clothes)

- Slim and so so pretty

- Pink flush as the tip with a curve

- Not very girthy, but he got the shlong. 8.5 inches (min). shlongggg

- Definitely a grower, you never knew how much he was packing under those gray sweatpants

- When they say boners are a result of blood rushing to the penis- well shit they really mean it

- The veins on his cock?? You just can’t look away

- They’re so prominent, you can feel each one sliding across your walls while he thrusts inside you

- You can see his length plunging in and out of your stomach

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

- Okay so his sex drive actually isn’t exceptionally high?

- He just gets turned on very easily

- Not sure how to explain it

- Just know, if you’re ready, he’s ready too

- Kiss him for a second too long and a bulge will surely appear

- Sometimes gets embarrassed by it

- Give him some encouragement, he is blushing so hard rn. It’s normal poo

Z = Zzz (how quickly do they fall asleep after sex)

- Hardly ever falls asleep right after sex. If he does, he makes sure you’re sleeping before him. Will continue to take care of you when you’re too tired

- Hygiene is really important to him, and sex is usually messy

- Checks that both of you pee after

- There’ an extra sheet on the bed ready to be removed so you two can hurry and sleep if need be

- How is he always this prepared sheesh

- It’s custom that he turns on a trashy telenovela afterward

- Will sing / hum you to sleep

[serosinkyslut]

“I need you”

Sero x fem!Black reader

Warnings: mentions of drugs, smut, p r a i s e, slight bruising, some overstim w/ nipple play, panic attack, angst, choking, and squirting

Summary: You’re about to tell Sero a thing or two after getting a call from him at 3am. But his response leads to a different discussion…

Word count: about 2.7k

Author’s note: Quick question/// how did we all come to an agreement that Sero smokes?? Is this canon? Could it be canon?

Authors note pt. 2: I didn’t think the angst would be so long, so just skip to the {***}asterisks if you just wanna read the smut

The Sero you know has always been calm, cool, and collected. When you receive a phone call at 3am, you assume it’s one of his usual antics; him asking you if you’ve heard Megan’s new song, explaining why Denki is such a dumbass, or his take on the Netflix show you told him to watch. The bright light of your phone stings your eyes before you hear the ringtone. Taki Taki by Selena Gomez blasts from your nightstand- a song Sero knew annoyed the crap out of you, and hence forced you to set it as his ringtone after a bet you lost months ago. Hearing it so many times now, after all, Sero was your best friend and boyfriend, the tune wasn’t as bad. As you reach over to answer it, silencing the dumb song, you’re semi-pissed off and ready to tell Sero that whatever he has to say can definitely wait til morning. You were exhausted and had just seen Sero only a few hours ago. However, when you answer the phone, the soft but audible sniffle instantly shuts you up.

There’s a shaky breath before “y/n...I....” he pauses, trying to regain control of his broken voice. Your heart squeezes terribly as he tried to force himself to talk. What had happened? You were just laughing together not too long ago.

“Sero? What’s wrong? Are you okay??”

You hear him struggling to tell you what’s going on with him, but only a strangled cry comes out as he bursts into tears. You’ve never heard Sero this broken, this distraught. Hell, you’ve hardly ever seen him have a semi bad day. Tears prickle at the corner of your eyes. It hurts you to know that your bestfriend is in so much pain.

“I need you,” he manages to get out through gasps.

“I’m on my way right now,” you tell him in a smooth, stable voice. You’re scared that it’ll only freak him out even more if he knew how panicked you were. In a total frenzy, you throw on a big shirt and grab your car keys on the way out, not even thinking about your bonnet still on your head, your raggedy house slippers on your feet, or even the fact that you're dashing out your apartment at 3am with no pants on. You can only think about Sero, and how bad he must be feeling to call you in absolute tears. You don’t bother with a seatbelt, and hardly look out for other cars as you zoom to his apartment. A trip that should have taken 20 minutes didn’t even take 10 as you park in the spot Sero was convinced was just for you. A space directly in front of his apartment that was always vacant, and also so happened to be right next to his car. Your feet fly you to the second floor and you fumble searching for the red cheetah printed key to his apartment that he copied for you. He thought it was hilarious how tacky it was, and even customized his own key so that you guys could match. That was Sero for you- always thinking of you. Always going the extra mile to see you happy. And now that precious boy was suffering, crying alone in his apartment. “Wait...is he even in his apartment?” You slam your palm to your forehead. You didn’t even bother asking where he was before rushing over. Fuck. Sending a silent prayer, you flip out the red key and open the door.

As soon as you do, a gush of smoke exits, flooding your nostrils with the smell of weed. You can hardly see into the space, trying to make it safely to Sero’s room where you figure he must be, smoking in his little alcove by the window with the air diffuser on. Instead, you hear his sniffling from the living room, almost blocked out by the tv which, ironically, is in fact playing the Netflix show that you recommended to him last week. Dragging your eyes from the flashing tv, you focus your attention to the shaking lump of covers on the sofa. Taking deep breaths, you walk towards him.

“Sero?” you whisper quietly and he freezes. He doesn’t respond, but you know he heard you. “Sero... I’m here”. You take a few more wary steps before you place your hand on the blanket he’s hiding under and peel it always carefully, revealing the top of his head. You bend down to get a look at his face, but when you try, he only lowers his head even more. You smooth his hair down with one hand, and place the other ever so gently under his chin, trying to get him to look at you. “Look at me, Sero. Please? Tell me what’s wrong”. Sero, being one to never deny you anything you ask for, tilts his head up gingerly. His eyes are totally bloodshot, and you can’t tell if it’s from the weed, the crying, or both. But either way, it breaks you I’m so many different ways. Sero opens his mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. You slip into the thick covers with him and press him to your chest, wrapping your arms around his head. Almost instinctively, he wraps his arms around your waist, burying his face into you while gripping you tightly like his life depends on it. You keep smoothing down his hair, whispering a mix of “everything’s okay. I’m here. It’s okay. You’re safe,” while peckering kisses on his head. It takes a few minutes to calm down from his.. panic attack? Jesus, you want to know what’s wrong so you can fix it. Once he’s stable, he finally looks up at you with those big beautiful eyes and kisses your chin. Then your jaw, neck, collar bones, and finally stopping at the gap between your breasts. He sighs in to you, face between your breasts, and reluctantly releases his grip around your waist. All of a sudden, everything spills out at once. He rambles on about how 5 civilians had died right in front of him two months ago. 3 of them being children. How he could’ve saved them if he had been a better hero. How he was having nightmares about them, and about you. It could have been you that day. Would he be able to save you then? Would you resent him for being so weak? He’d been getting high almost every night to ease his anxiety, but he finally cracked when the Netflix show you gave him had a child die in the last scene of the 2nd season. That was the trigger for his first panic attack. When he called you, he was right in the middle of it, and couldn’t think of someone better to contact. And his gut was right. Just you holding him in your arms made the bad thoughts go away. You were better than the weed, better than all the numerous distractions he had to make him think about everything but the accident. He felt safe. He felt loved. He never knew that was what he needed most. Now that he was calm in your arms, he wanted to reciprocate all the love you always showered him.

*** [here’s the smut you whores]

He began pressing sloppy, wet kisses against the base of your neck, sucking so hard on the skin that you knew for a fact it would leave a bruise or two. “I love you y/n. You’re so good to me,” he breathes before licking long stripes along your collarbone. “I love you so much”. Dammit this man was high as hell. You felt some guilt bubbling in the pit of your stomach at Sero’s advances. Should you be enjoying this as much as you are right now? Your best friend just had a panic attack. Yet, the feeling was quickly replaced by a pleasurable heat as he firmly grabbed your ass with one hand and pressed his boner against your cunt, pushing almost painfully hard through your thin T-shirt. It wasn’t until that moment you remembered all you had on was this shirt and underwear.

With his other hand, he removes your bonnet and threads his hands in your curls, getting tangled easily while he lightly scraped your scalp, right at the crown. Right where you liked it. You let out a soft moan that was met with a slight throb of Sero’s cock. “You’re fucking perfect, Princesa. Your hair and skin feel so perfect. So perfect for Papi”. He bites down on your collar bone, receiving a sharp yelp in surprise and a tug at his hair. “ohhh hermosa you feel so good,” he groans, his Spanish beginning to flow as you both get even more turned on. “All I need is you, y/n,” he says. Carefully, he takes his hand out of your kinks and places one on your hip, rubbing small circles with his nails. He stops for a moment in this position. He murmurs, almost to himself, “You’re all I need, mi cielito. After all the bullshit I put you through, I don’t deserve you,” he starts to choke a bit on his words at the end, and you sense the tears coming. You love Sero, and in no way did he not deserve you. He needed to know that. Pulling his lips away from you, which are now swollen, you stare into his eyes and tell him “I love you, and only you Sero. I don’t want or need anyone else”. A quick tear escapes from his eye and it slides right into the crook of your arm. You wipe it away with the palm of your hand, keeping it pressed on his cheek. “I mean it, Sero”. A slow, lopsided smile presents itself on his face. “That was pretty cheesy y/n. I never pegged you for the sentimental type”. You mirror his smile, your heart soars at the inkling of normalcy between you two. “Oh fuck off,” you say playfully pushing his head away. “We both know that I’m a huge romantic. Besides,” dropping your voice and gently pressing your lips against his ear, “no one else could get me this wet in a few minutes. Sero giggled at you, yes giggled, and shook his head.

“Horny ass. Let me have this damn opportunity to be lovey-dovey” Sero’s fake agitation is so forced you couldn’t help but outrightly laugh. After the moment passes though, you suddenly become serious. “Are you sure about this Sero?”

“I’m always sure when it comes to you hermosa”

This time, he places a slow, deep kiss to your mouth, swiping a hot tongue along your bottom lip, asking for permission to enter. As usual, you give it to him without a second thought.

Sex with Sero is always passionate, but today felt extremely intense. You’d be lying to yourself if you said it didn’t turn you on. Plus, there was so much smoke in the apartment that you had to be getting a second hand high right now.

Sitting up and dragging you with him, covers sliding to the floor, he positions you two at the edge of the couch, your back facing a blaring tv that neither of you bother to turn off as you straddle him. One swift tug has your shirt off, revealing your pebbled nipples and a lacey red underwear you don’t even remember putting on.

A low whistle leaves Sero’s lips. “You couldn’t possibly have mistaken my phone call for a booty call, could you? ‘Cause this is sexy as fuck mami”

Wasting no more time, he wraps his mouth around one nipple, flicking the dexterous muscle back and forth. The other nipple pinched between his fingers while he pulls and squeezes harshly, the pain meshing deliciously with the pleasure. With his free hand, he wraps his lanky fingers around the back of your neck, encircling almost completely around your throat. Yanking your head back with just the right amount of force, you can’t help the loud, high pitched moan that leaves you. Your hips spasm along his thigh, leaving a visible line of slit on his pants. Sero hums against your skin, tightening his grip on you, “you like that, don’t you? Grinding your cunt on my thigh while my hands choke your pretty little neck”

You were going to respond, but his teeth bite down on your breast, the other one met by a thumb flicking across the bud quickly. Your hips buck against his leg, the pressure causing a flood of incoherent sounds. You’re a mess of moans, white pulsing at the edges of your vision, heat rocking through your entire body. And just when you think the pain starts to be too much, he presses his knee right against your clit, making you see stars. “Sero!!” Your screams and gasps are so noisy that you know the neighbors are sure of who’s making you feel this good. His mouth rips from your nipple with a pop, but instantly latches onto your lips.

He uses both of his hands to palm your ass, grinding your hips faster and harder, your clit exploding with pleasure. Eyes squeezed shut, you slam your arms down on him, clawing at his shoulders. The feeling was so fast, so intense, too good, you were being sent over the edge. Your words were incomprehensible, you could hardly even speak to tell him you were close, so so close.

“Fuck! Sero I-”

“Shit y/n you look so fucking hot,” he grunts against your lips, “Please cum, cum for papi. You’re so pretty on top of me y/n. Cum all over my pants with that pretty pussy of yours baby”. One hand smacks down across your tits, making you jump so hard you almost fall off his leg. He never stops gripping and kneading at them, rougher than ever, before twisting your nipples again. You claw at his shoulders, practically sobbing from the pleasure, screaming “yes yes yes! So good! So...!”

Another slap makes your eyes roll to the back of your head, your orgasm building in your core. He squishes your tits together, and plunges both nipples in his mouth, biting and sucking fervently. At the same time he bounces his knee, you feel the burning knot coming undone. “Papi, I’m gonna cum, I’m coming, I’m-”

You couldn’t say anymore, as a gush of hot liquid squirted all over his leg. Sero hums with your tits still in his mouth, the tiny vibrations sending bolts of electricity down your spine. You gradually came back down from your high (and not the weed high), Sero still rocking you slowly against his pant leg. When you come back to reality, your head falls forward, instantly tired and tense from that world-changing orgasm. After opening your eyes, you spot a wet circle right at the center of Sero’s legs. “Sero, did you just cum?”

He glances down, and his eyes widened when he also sees the sticky wetness seeping through. He looks back up at you, blessing you with his wide, toothy smile. “I guess I did, huh?”

Bitch is high as hell. You chuckle slightly before you hear a nearly inaudible squelch under you. Now you look between your own legs, and freeze at what you see.

Shit

“Did I… did I just?”

“Yeah,” Sero snorted, “You squirted on my thigh. I think it got on the couch too.”

Oh my god. You press your palms to your eyes immediately, totally embarrassed by what you did. Not to mention the fact that you were basically naked, while Sero was still fully clothed. How did this even happen? You’ve never squirted before. Did you have some sort of torture kink? Your tits hurt like hell right now. Turning your head away, you say “that’s so embarrassing”

“Embarrassing? Look at me” Sero takes you by the wrists and removes your hands from your face, but your eyes still look away. “Look at me baby,” he persists, squeezing your cheeks between his thumb and index with his lanky fingers, forcing your eyes on his. His blissed out eyes are still glossed over with an incredible lustful stare. “That was fucking hot, y/n. Can you do it again? Please?”

[jennstarkid]

About a week ago I posted this.

I’ve been getting horrible messages like this in my ask for months, including:

and my personal favorite

After getting the message saying “Just go kill yourself” I was completely done dealing with this person’s horrible messages and replied with just an “Okay.” and logged off tumblr.

About a week later I logged back on with 17 messages in my ask, most of them from the anon. I scrolled down and at first when I logged off, the anon messaged me things like

I scrolled up more and all of a sudden they started sending me more and more messages like

This was extremely surprising to me. I thought “After all those horrible messages you sent to me for MONTHS about hating me and wanting me dead, you say ‘sorry’ and that you ‘cant be responsible for someone’s suicide’?”

But I guess the lesson goes like this:

DONT TELL ANYONE TO KILL THEMSELVES UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED FOR WHAT MIGHT ACTUALLY HAPPEN

[galaxywarrioress1234]

DON’T TELL ANYONE TO KILL THEMSELVES EVER.

[red-rioter]

THIS POST IS SO IMPORTANT I WANT EVERYONE ON TUMBLR IN THE WORLD TO SEE IT

[serenityhayashi]

This needs to be reblogged. I couldn’t scroll past this if I tried, I got a message like that but not for me, it told me to my friend to kill them self, I was livid! I didn’t answer it because a message like that doesn’t deserve an answer but I don’t see what is so funny about telling someone to kill them selves! I really don’t! It’s sick and it’s wrong. This person though, I take my hat off to you. You taught that bully a lesson.

[dressedlikeadaydrexm]

this.

[luna-bane]

This will always be number one on the list of things that aren’t okay

[lovelyseptics]

Ho-ly shit.

[mr-white-eyes-cosplay-deactivat]

I’ll never not reblog this

[norc-ara-deactivated20160821]

If you dare scroll without reblogging this you have no soul…….. i mean you do but reblogging this wont ruin your blog……. please just spread the word.

[anon-of-the-shadows-archive-dea]

Please people don’t send anon hate your just hurting yourselves…

[all-about-drarry]

Don’t tell anyone to kill themselves. EVER.

[rouge-fox-expanded]

A PSA we shouldn’t need, but we do…because some people are fucking horrible

[freckled-words]

It does not matter what your home situation is. It does not matter where your mental health situation is. If you are HUMAN. YOU DO NOT TELL SOMEONE TO KILL THEMSELVES.

Monsters tell people to kill themselves. Beings that deserve to be slaughtered, burned alive, or drowned, tell people to kill themselves. 

If you are someone that tells another person to kill themselves, as a cruel joke, or genuinely out of dislike of that person. Unfollow me, right this fucking instant. 

[matronofthevoid]

FUCKING THISSS^^^^^

[rose-of-sharon-cass]

This!

[mutualize]

Don't kill yourself, please.

[mutualize]

If you’re suffering from depression and are looking for a sign to not go through with ending your life, this is it. This is the sign. We care.

If you see this on your dash, reblog it. You could save a life.