Thoughts of the Deepest Stems

Just another twenty-something year old finding her place in the world whilst simultaneously writing about it. I'm British, and yes, I do like to drink ridiculous amounts of tea. I'd love to get to know you and be friends, so send me a message! Have a lovely day. You can also find me on Instagram

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

How is it possible to like someone for such a long time and then when you get into a relationship with them you realize that's it's not what you expected nor what you want?

I believe that sometimes it is possible to like a person for a long time on the surface, before learning about their true personality. Once you begin a relationship, you can see the ‘real’ them more clearly, and that might be the person you thought you liked, or it might not be.

Ultimately, once you get into a relationship, that’s when you find out more about them, their expectations, their hopes and dreams. And sadly, even though you’ve liked that person for so long, their opinions on the relationship may not align with yours. This can affect your views on your relationship, and it might not be what you initially wanted. You might discover that they’re not who you thought they were, and you might succumb to that or you might walk away.

There must be a reason that you liked this person so much, and so, if you plan to stay in this relationship, it might be worth communicating your expectations with them. And if they don’t agree, then that’s your cue to make a decision to stay or leave.

I hope you’re okay and I’m always here if you want to talk about this some more.

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

There is no emotion coursing through me. There is ice forming over my heart; it numbs the pain. There is a tornado brewing within my soul; the frost puts it out before I self-destruct. There is a wound that has been opened; yet, I feel nothing but grey.

thoughtsofthedeepeststems

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

Hello, my lovelies.

First of all, I would like to apologise for my very, very late replies to you all. My inbox is currently filled with messages that I haven’t had a chance to reply to, and I promise I will be doing so very shortly! I would also like to apologise for my lack of posts. I will be posting lots from now on; lots of new inspiration and new poems and quotes!

I’ve been working on a few very exciting things, which you will all hear about very soon. I have also made an Instagram account (thoughtsofthedeepeststems) if anyone wants to follow me there! As you can see, I’ve also made myself a new logo and I’ve been changing up my theme to reflect the new content coming; lots of new stuff coming for you!

For now, here’s a recent poem I’ve redrafted from 2016!

I’m so so sorry everyone, and I promise I’ll get back to everyone very soon! Thanks for being patient and sticking with me.

Sending love to you all.

[wnq-writers]

I’m starting to think that maybe you didn’t come into my life for me to fall in love with you. Maybe you came into my life so I could learn how to love myself.

thoughtsofthedeepeststems (via wnq-writers)

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

OMG YOU ARE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BLOG i love you so much xoxo 💓👄

This is so nice of you to say! Thank you so much, I love you too! :)

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

How do you continually soothe individual's needs with your words of compassion and understanding? It's rare to find a person that takes the time to give the world the care and attention that she needs. You are a beautiful soul. You have my respect and my utmost gratitude for the service and peace you give people everyday. Thank you for making this world a better place one heart at a time.

This message has made my day, no, my week. Thank you so, so much for taking the time out of your day to send such an uplifting and positive message. I am so grateful. Messages like this are just so wonderful.

You are a beautiful soul too, and I hope you’re doing well. Thank YOU for making the world a better place, too. Hope you have a good day! Thank you again, I will truly cherish this message for a long time.

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

How do you get over someone you don’t want to get over?

Getting over someone that you don’t want to get over may be one of the hardest things to do, particularly because a part of you wants to hang on and not let go.

You will need courage. That beautiful feeling of first having a crush, and then becoming infatuated and falling in love will make you want to continue as you are. You will need to be strong and tell yourself that getting over that person is the best thing for you.

You will need willpower. Deciding to try and get over someone is one thing, but sticking to that decision is something you need willpower for. You will feel like giving up and giving in, like letting yourself go and letting yourself fall back into that feeling of infatuation, and you need to push yourself not to.

You will need patience. Getting over someone won’t happen overnight, and you will need perseverance. It will be a difficult process, and you will feel heartbroken, emotional and nostalgic. You will feel like you’re losing that person, even though they’re right there. You will feel separated, and this is why you will be yourself.

You will need your own self to help you through. You will need to distract yourself, by living a life that you don’t need that person for. You will need to continue going on without them, and eventually you’ll be happier without them.

It won’t be easy, but you can do it. Step by step, I believe in you. I hope you’re okay.

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

You deserve more than broken promises and goodbyes. You deserve more than that person who never called you back, and that last kiss that kept you hanging on. You deserve more than when you found out those friends that meant the world to you didn't think the same. You deserve more than the back and forth, the tears, the fights. You deserve more. You deserve love, surrounded with kindness and joy. You deserve that laughter that makes your stomach hurt, and that happiness that makes you smile so much that your cheeks go numb. You deserve to feel butterflies and giddiness when you see that person you like. You deserve everything that is good in the world. You deserve all the happiness in the world, and I hope you find it. I hope you see that you deserve the best, because you're more special than you think you are. And you're more wonderful than you believe. Remember that. Please, remember that.

thoughtsofthedeepeststems // this one is for all of you who have ever felt like you're not good enough - you are incredible

[wnq-writers]

Sometimes you were meant to be with them for a moment and not for a lifetime.

thoughtsofthedeepeststems (via wnq-writers)

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

how do you fall out of love with someone?

You fall out of love with someone slowly, much more slowly than you fell in love with them. Falling out of love comes in stages.

You feel every emotion in one; heartbreak, rejection, confusion, nostalgia, wistfulness, anguish. You feel broken. You will want to hang on to something, even thought deep down you know that there is nothing left to hold on to. You overthink for a while, and then you finally accept that you weren’t right for each other.

You spend some time apart, and you begin to see the light again. You start to stop thinking about them constantly, and the echo of their haunting voice in your mind dissipates. Their eyes, their smile, you start to forget them. But a part of them is still with you.

You learn how to live life without them again. You start to remember who you were before them, and you will accept that you have changed after them. You will see that you are a new person. You will pick up the pieces that were left broken on the floor. You will mend yourself.

You will realise that you’re perfectly fine on your own, and you are happy. You will be whole again. You will realise that you are all you need.

I hope you’re doing okay, love.

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

"You have to move on." They say it as if it's that easy. If only moving on was as easy as that. If only your feelings could just disappear as quickly as they developed. If only you couldn't feel your heartbeat picking up in pace when they walk past. If only you could stop that hurricane of emotion when you see them. If only you couldn't feel your heart break every time you reminded yourself that you're not together.

thoughtsofthedeepeststems

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

You added light to my soul, And whilst it was temporary, I thank you, for making me feel exuberant, even if it was only for a moment.

thoughtsofthedeepeststems

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

2017 // Lessons I Have Learnt Lesson One: Despite promises being made, people will still leave you, even when there is no valid reason. Remember that it is not your fault; don’t blame yourself if someone refuses to see how wonderful you are. Lesson Two: Relationships are two-sided, and you can only fight so hard to maintain a relationship that is slowly withering to nothing. When they’ve stopped trying, it is time to let go. Lesson Three: Always stay kind and never change yourself to fit in. Never change for other people and never lose yourself. It is always better to remain a good and kind human being and be labelled as ‘naïve’. Lesson Four: Overthinking will break you more than bad decisions will. Sometimes, thinking too much about everything is the most self-destructive thing to do. Lesson Five: Although you want to try to mend things that have been broken, sometimes they should be left alone to heal. Sometimes, the bridges burnt are not so easily fixed. Lesson Six: You will make mistakes; it is inevitable. Don’t blame yourself, mistakes are a natural process of life and growth. Just ensure that you learn from your errors. Lesson Seven: Let yourself love, but don’t give away so many pieces of you that you are left with nothing. Don’t give away so many parts of you to someone who wouldn’t do the same. Love yourself and see your worth. Lesson Eight: Sometimes, it is important to put yourself first and say no. Whilst it’s hard to disappoint people, you need to do what is best for you, too. Lesson Nine: Never forget the people who truly have your best interests at heart. Don’t get carried away in the rapture of acquaintances who you think are friends but are really strangers. Remember the ones who have always been there. Lesson Ten: Let yourself go, and let every moment matter. Don’t waste time on insignificant things that won’t matter in a few years time. Make the most of everything and live in the moment, not in the past or the future. Let yourself be. Lesson Eleven: Falling too quickly and too deeply has the most disastrous consequences. Take things slowly, and take them one step at a time. It will all fall into place if it’s meant to be. Lesson Twelve: Don’t let yourself become too attached to people; even the strongest promise has the tendency to break. Lesson Thirteen: Do not settle for anything less than what you deserve. You are worth more than you believe yourself to be. Don’t forget that you are also special. Lesson Fourteen: Know when to apologize, but also know when not to. Stop apologizing for things that are not your fault, and for things that don’t require an apology. Lesson Fifteen: Never make a decision when you are angry; you will later be filled with regret and shame. Always wait until you have calmed down before doing anything drastic. Lesson Sixteen: Fall in love with a person, not with the idea of love. Whilst it’s easy to idealise someone and imagine a world of possibilities, don’t forget to be realistic. That feeling of infatuation won’t last forever. Lesson Seventeen: People will change, and you will change with them. No one ever stays the same no matter how badly we may want to. 2017, you have been a whirlwind of emotion and the fastest rollercoaster ride I have ever experienced. Whilst I have loved, I have also lost. Whilst I have been as broken as shards of glass shattered on the floor, I am mending. Whilst I have been hurt, I am trying to heal.

t.m. // thoughtsofthedeepeststems

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

Why can't I cry when I'm full of sadness over the break up?

Everyone handles heartbreak in their own way.

One person may cry as much as their heart bleeds, and their heartache will fall down their face in the form of tears.

And another person, their heartbreak may not be quite so visible. Whilst they may not cry, it can be felt in the depth of their veins. Their emotions may echo through their heartbeats.

Don’t think that there is something wrong because you can’t cry. We all handle things differently, and you are handling the break up in your own way. Hope you’re okay.

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

I’m in love with my best friend and it’s killing me. Shes one of those girls that just seem too good to be real and although I know she doesnt feel the same way I want to tell her how perfect she is, how beautiful and smart she is and how just being with her is the most amazing feeling in the world. I know she could do a lot better than me but I admire her so much Im afraid if I tell her things will be weird and I could lose a good friend, so do I risk it or just let it break my heart even more?

I think the first question to ask yourself is, how do you know she doesn’t feel the same way? Is there anything that has told you that she’s not interested in being more than friends? Maybe try and play it out and see if she reciprocates your feelings.

She sounds absolutely lovely, like a girl whose heart is made of gold and a girl who deserves all the love in the world. If she’s as sweet and nice as you have described her, then telling her about your feelings will not ruin your friendship in the slightest. In fact, she will probably appreciate the honesty and the guts it would take for you to admit your feelings to her.

At the end of the day, do what feels right for you. Give yourself time to determine whether she has any feelings for you, and let yourself decide whether you should risk it. I wish I could tell you what the best option is, but truth be told, only you know the situation and only you can determine what to do.

Whatever you decide, I hope it all works out for you. Sending lots of good vibes your way!

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

My biggest regret is falling so deeply in love with you, that I didn’t have any love left to share with the others who deserved it more.

thoughtsofthedeepeststems

[thoughtsofthedeepeststems]

I have given you pieces of myself without first considering whether I’ll be able to survive when you leave and take them with you.

thoughtsofthedeepeststems