Caleb’s Tiefling Bby Apple

20s | she/her | multifandom | MDNI

[doeberman-deactivated20210530]

wait babe before we move on i need to break every barrel in this room to check for hidden items

[drdaanvondutch]

in law school, my mom took me to this stress retreat because my family was vaguely aware i was a suicide risk. and they didnt allow phones, so i brought this huge bag of books. and one of the options for "destressing" was this fake cave grotto thing, where they'd decorated a room to make it look exactly like an underground cave and the air was like -10 degrees, but there was a like 4ft deep pool in the middle that was kept super super hot, so you would just switch between the hot and cold. and they would bring you an endless supply of this weird syrupy drink thing that was like super caffeinated and tasted like sugar and mint. and so i spent multiple days sitting half submerged in this fake grotto drinking mystery liquid and reading. and i have to be honest i really did feel less stressed

[batsandbutch]

[giragirameganedan]

[what-even-is-thiss]

When I was a teenager I had a phase where I called soccer football because the rest of the world called it that but eventually my dad told me “You know, there’s a point where acting smart doesn’t make you smart and just makes you annoying. Refusing to use the word that everyone else around you uses doesn’t make you smarter than them.”

So anyways I call it soccer now.

[imzemo]

I typically refer to American football as egg shaped hand ball

[what-even-is-thiss]

What kind of eggs have you been using

[gorps]

[longsightmyth]

I bring a real 'actually people who are pregnant do deserve some special consideration because they are effectively at least temporarily disabled if not permanently after some complications' vibe to the party that a lot of people don't seem to like

[funstyle]

Was just having a discussion with my fiance that taco bell should change their slogan to "it's gonna be okay" or at the very least shorten "live más" to "live". just feels like thats what we need from them

[funstyle]

They should change it to "live por favor" and when they hand you your order you hold hands for a moment and look in each others eyes

[queerprayers]

house I am staying in for work usually houses a ~christian marriage counselor~ and I flipped through a book and stopped in my tracks. it had not occurred to me, no.

[mun-dane]

on love arriving unannounced

[mun-dane]

so overwhelmed by the love my little poem received, i wanna cry

[redstonedust]

its actually easy to de-enshittify your digital experience all you need to do is install this browser extension and this browser extension and this browser extension and input this custom script into the advanced box and go into your system settings and reconfigure all these options you didnt know existed and change your entire workflow and switch to this alternative operating system and this alternative web browser and this alternative chat client and this alternative word processor and this alternative- sorry that one turned out to be malware delete that one okay now double check your task manager for unwanted background processes and element block these ads and invest in a good VPN and append all your searches with AI blocking keywords and wait a few years until everything you just did becomes shitty too so you can do it all over again okay kitten. its literally that easy.

[rhinco]

i understand that it's unreasonable to expect a band on world tour to play in every country in the world but i do think they should only be allowed to call it a world tour if they play in every continent. we need to make it embarrassing to say world tour and then not even step foot in africa

[3liza]

IDENTITY EMERGES ORGANICALLY FROM ACTION

[oneheadtoanother]

[evilsoup]

this is just truthslop.you believe it because it happens to conform to reality

[doubleca5t]

This is what Republicans sound like

[fairycosmos]

the issue with growing up in the 2000s and 2010s was like there was this really big push toward "accepting your weirdness" overall but they meant like idk wearing mismatched socks or something not being tangibly beyond the norm in any way shape or form

[sawed-on-shotgun]

the human body when you use it and exist in it

[ozempicofficial]