One second Evan is stoically thanking a nurse for keeping him updated on Hen and Chim's conditions, the next she's gone and Tommy watches as all of Evan's resolve seems to vanish in a flash, his hands shaking as his legs threaten to give out beneath him.
Tommy's out of his chair in an instant to catch him, taking his weight before he hits the floor.
"I got you," he mutters as Evan starts sobbing into his chest, great wracking things that shudder through his whole body as Tommy just holds him, wishing there was something, anything he could do to ease his pain.
It's a few minutes before a different nurse pats Tommy gently on the shoulder.
"There's a quiet room just down the hall if you need it," she says softly and Tommy nods gratefully as she points him in the right direction.
"Evan, can you walk?" he asks, lifting his head with a gentle finger to the chin and trying not to let his own heart break even further at the sight of Evan so distraught, so thoroughly wrung out that he's almost unrecognisable.
Evan manages a nod, letting Tommy walk him down the hall. The door to the quiet room shuts itself behind them, blocking out the thrum of voices and activity from the waiting room, surprisingly busy for 5am on a Friday morning.
Tommy settles Evan onto a worn couch then crouches down in front of him.
"Chimney and Hen, they're okay?" he asks gently, hands resting softly on Evan's knees; he suspects that's what caused him to break, the last two pieces of the puzzle falling into place.
Tommy had watched Evan eventually pull himself off the floor of the lab, had seen the way he'd arranged his face like a mask as he'd taken charge, making sure that everyone was taken care of as much as was possible right now.
Tommy had helped where he could but really, Evan hadn't needed him; he'd taken it all on himself and Tommy knows Bobby would be proud, even as it hurts to think it.
He won't say it, not yet, but he hopes Evan knows.
"Yeah," Evan replies, voice raw and broken, "they're gonna be fine."
"Good," Tommy says, relief flooding his chest and making him feel almost nauseous as it churns with the grief in his stomach. "Now, I'm going to get you some water-"
"No!" Evan looks almost panicked for a moment. "Uh, sorry, I just meant… stay? Please." He wipes a hand across his eyes before continuing, quieter and somehow even more vulnerable. "I, uh… I don't want to be alone. Not yet."
"Okay," Tommy says simply, moving to sit next to him on the couch; it's squashier than he expected and he sinks into it as Evan immediately burrows into his side.
"Sorry," he mutters into Tommy's chest, and Tommy frowns as he throws an arm around him, pulling him even closer.
"What on earth are you apologising for?"
"I'm trying to be strong for them, like B- Bobby wanted, he said, he said they'd need me, but I just-"
"Evan, sweetheart," Tommy interrupts, tears welling in his own eyes as he takes hold of Evan's hand, "you don't have to be strong for me, okay? You've done everything you can and for now, everyone is taken care of. They'll need you again but right now, let me take care of you."
Evan squeezes his hand, tilting his head to look up at him with his big blue, watery eyes.
"I just… can't believe he's really gone," he says, barely getting to the end of his sentence before the great wracking sobs start up again, his whole body shaking in Tommy's arms.
"I know, baby, I know," Tommy says, barely even noticing the pet name slip out as he listens to Evan fall apart in his arms, each sob sending a stab of grief through his own heart.
At least, Tommy tells himself, at least he can do this right. Can make sure he's there for Evan through it all, as much as he needs or wants.
"Whatever you need," he mutters almost to himself as he rubs soothing circles into Evan's back, his callouses catching on the soft fabric of his LAFD issue jacket. "I'm right here."
From a written and cinematic standpoint, Bobby revealing he has CCHF was so well-done because we were Buck in that moment. Buck can be a himbo, but he's never been stupid. And neither are we. We all got the feeling when Bobby hung back that there could only really be one reason he wouldn't leave.
Buck following him with this hopeful "what's up, aren't you coming?" mentality is the same one we had watching this unfold.
Seeing Bobby close the doors with himself inside can only mean one thing -- we know it and Buck knows it. We -- the audience and Buck -- are pleading with Bobby not to remove his gear because doing so exposes him...but simultaneously, we understand that the only reason he'd remove his gear is that he's already been exposed.
The audience and Buck remain in a state of 'there's gotta be some other reason' up until the moment we see the blood dripping out of Bobby's nose.
Bobby telling Buck that he's going to be okay without him and that the 118 needs him all while Buck wordlessly disbelieves this is also what we as an audience are experiencing -- not knowing how to watch this show without Bobby but being encouraged to do so for the other characters and plots.
Regardless of personal feelings on the creative decision to kill off Bobby Nash, and regardless of the personal feelings on the plotline and method of killing him off, mirroring the audience through Buck in this moment was very chef's kiss.
the way buck’s face goes so incredibly soft and the way his body immediately relaxes when he hears the words “and for you” come out of tommy’s mouth is etched into my mind forever. one of my favourite exchanges between them from tommy’s words, how they were said, and buck’s candid, raw reaction….gah
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