the fresno nightcrawlers

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taylor price
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Claire Keane
Peter Solarz
trying on a metaphor
will byers stan first human second

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blake kathryn
ojovivo

oozey mess
One Nice Bug Per Day
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
🪼

Kaledo Art
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

@theartofmadeline
wallacepolsom
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@tookmelongenough-right
the fresno nightcrawlers
unclean = adj. of or pertaining to uncles
REGRET TO INFORM YOU YOUR SON HAS DIED FROM TRENCH FOOT LOL HE SERVED WITH COURAGE AND HONOR LOL PLEASE ACCEPT OUR DEEPEST CONDOLENCES LOL
Saw this license plate today and I'm still ugly laughing about it
Every morning, the queen asked her magic mirror to show her the most beautiful person in the world.
The mirror replied "To whom?"
"The miller who made the flour for my bread," the queen would say, or "Whoever spun the thread my shawl was made of".
The mirror would show her, and she'd be amazed.
The first time, she says "To me," and the mirror dutifully shows her her reflection. And she is pleased.
The second time, she says "To the King," and she is pleased to see herself once more.
The third time, she says "To the Royal Advisor," and is once more satisfied to see herself.
The fourth time, she says "To the scribe who takes the King's letters." She is shown the man's wife. And she seethes, but quiets herself, for it is only right that a man loves his wife.
The fifth time, she says "To the Court Wizard," and is shown the man's departed mother as he remembers her from his youth, radiant and smiling and warm and larger than life.
The tenth time, she says "To the Stable Master," and is shown the fastest horse in the stable, majestic and free as the wind even in captivity
"To the baker," she is shown the man's daughter, young and adorable and full of joy and laughter.
"To the artist who did my portrait," she is shown a painting of a woman done by the man's teacher, who he still looks up to now that he is well established himself.
"To the Royal Knight," she is surprised but not displeased to see the castle's entire guard force in the middle of doing drills.
The one hundredth time she asks the mirror, and it asks her "to whom?" she once again says, "To me." And she does the same the one hundred and second, and again and again and again.
It is a different person each time, and they are all beautiful.
B A B Y
ooooo
TINY BABY
is it ok to get "white girl wasted" if you arent white?
yes
no
why am i being ratioed here...no's come to my defense
is it ok to get "white girl wasted" if you arent a girl?
yes
no
this is the discourse im here for
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VENT POST
you dont have to be a parent to understand the horror of walking into a room to discover that the baby crawled out of his crib and onto that pottery wheel you forgot to turn off, and while the baby is spinning around and around, the dog is sitting there all calm, like a person, gently using his paws to fashion the babys soft cartilage head into something a little more modern. it might be the classic tale of bad parenting, but lets see where the dog is going with this
This post is from 2013. It has less than 100 notes. Together we can revive this work of art that tragically ahead of its time. We’re ready for it now
I know we compare sewing machines to horses a lot due to the general tendency to spook at nothing and break their legs, but imagine if you had to clean lint out of tiny crevices inside a horse. it could really be so much worse.
people who are more horsified than me are no longer invited to weigh in on things that you have to clean off of or out of horses.
you learn something new everyday. unless you're a historian. then you learn something old
on another note, watched The Mummy (1999) the other day and I couldn’t help feel like the O’Connells and the Addams (Addams Family Values (1993) would get on really well ya know? The O’Connells are basically the pastel adventure version of the Addams, surely they would just be vibin’ over tea and crumpets in an extremely haunted mansion having a ball of a time
Morticia: “So what is it you do for a living my dear?”
Evelyn: “We dig up dead people who often have monstrous curses placed on them!”
Morticia: “fascinating”
Gomez: *leaping out from behind a pillar which is encrusted with ominous looking runes* en garde!
Rick: *grabs sword from equally ominous looking wall full of weapons one of which seems to be glowing* fantastic I was getting a bit rusty
Gomez: *nearly in tears* oh he’s screaming nonsensically, what spirit! what reslove!
*Rick and Gomez, still frantically sword fighting*
Rick: Have I mentioned how wonderful my wife is yet, I really feel like I haven’t really expanded enough on how wonderful she is
Gomez: do go on, I would be delighted to hear about how wonderful your wife is, I strongly encourge all men to extoll the virtues of their wives with rapturous praise, however I should perhaps mention my wife is in fact better
*sword fighting intensifies as both men rapturously extoll the virtues of their wives*
Jonathan and Fester and Cousin Itt watch from the bar, where Lurch and Thing are making the drinks.
Jonathan and Thing knew one another from The War; each thought the other to be dead
Their reunion is highly emotional
Rick, whilst swordfighting: My wife resurrected an ancient evil that brought about the plagues.
Gomez: What. A. Woman.
She should be at the club
Baby mouse had earplugs in the sketch and I straight up forgot to ink them pretend they're deep in there
Meanwhile not at the club:
I was so enamored by the party shrew this morning I had to doodle her in my lab notebook at work