Tori|27|S. America @toriiv - Tumblr Blog

bro screw g**gle's predictive search when I write 'antonym' I fucking mean 'antonym' and am not secretly searching for the word synonym, nor do I want to be provided synonyms. if I wanted synonyms I'd look for them. jfc.

luimnigh

Wait so you googled antonym and it gave you the word that means the opposite of what you were looking for?

vividsunset

Upon waking up I feel like Jared, 19

Some people do be bitches for the hell of it, nah?

unicorn-wrath

doyoulikethissong-poll

😂

my-random--thoughts-deactivated

nessy-s-junkdrawer

filmgifs

THE TWILIGHT SAGA: BREAKING DAWN - PART 2 (2012) dir. Bill Condon

unnatrlbross

Are…are these the real lines…???

ntrtloveless

Yes, yes they are.

secretlystephaniebrown

When I was a kid I thought there were so many more swear words than there are. But in actuality we get like. ten before it just turns into slurs. Deep down, I’m still disappointed.

ruinedchildhood

sw-or-gtfo-deactivated20211219

my bf has many interesting stories and observations from his new job as a 911 operator

my favorite is how meandering people are, even in the midst of a terrible emergency

they respond to “what is the emergency” with “well, the thing is, four weeks ago–”

and then he’s like “WHAT IS THE EMERGENCY RIGHT NOW”

and they’re like “so what happened this morning was, i said to my wife, i said–”

“WHAT IS CURRENTLY HAPPENING AT THIS MOMENT”

“oh i’m having a heart attack”

my second favorite is how specific he has to get sometimes

like, “what is your emergency?”

“i’m sitting in a pool of blood.”

“… is it… your blood?”

“yes i think so”

“do you know where it’s coming from?”

“probably the stab wound”

“have you been stabbed?”

“oh yah definitely”

lizawithazed

In all fairness shock is a hell of a drug

slatestarscratchpad

#MedicalHistoryTaking

lasrina

Slightly related true story from my family:

“911, what’s your emergency?”

“My house is on fire, but it’s just one wall and I have a fire extinguisher, so I think I can put it out.”

“Sir, please get out of the house. The fire engines are on their way.”

“I will in a minute, but I really think I can–”

“SIR. PLEASE. LEAVE THE HOUSE.”

“Fine.” [beat] “Okay, from out here I can see that the whole roof is on fire.”

the-haiku-bot

“Fine.” [beat] “Okay, from

out here I can see that the

whole roof is on fire.”

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

spectrometrie

when i was a kid my parents bought me an inflatable doll of the Scream by Edvard Munch (??) that was significantly taller than i was at the time and i used to slow-dance with it and pretend it was my boyfriend. It had its hands attached to its head obviously so it felt like he was always a bit horrified to be forced to dance with me

spectrometrie