you’re on the threshold of an amazing adventure

you think im out here for comedy? no, im not here for comedy, im not here for jokes

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

shoots you with a beam that immediately takes effect

[rcktpwr]

oh my god i can feel the effect…

[ashenbot]

how do you deal with your jealousy?

I embrace it like a cold knife to the belly.

[cardassian-artistry]

[evilwizard]

it’s time for demons to come out of the ground and for everyone to get special powers

[plumslices]

Your misbehaving boyfriend is not funny to me

[dogpuppy]

[ratbastarddotfuck]

you have to forgive the printer because it's one of the most machine-ass machines we interact with on a day to day basis. that thing says kerchunk. hardly anything says kerchunk these days. you can't get mad at her when she kerchunks up a little.

[digitalsymbiote]

Crazy that tech has gotten so bad that we're doing printer forgiveness now

[estrogenesis-vaporeongelion]

this is how people talk about george w bush

[sergal]

my favorite mashup emoji is this one and i wish it was real so bad

[coastal-mangos-one]

[ceruleanheaven]

[very clearly indulging the urge] im fighting the urge

[microposting]

your adventuring buddy is like "here I got a fairy in this cage in case we need healing" and you're like "WOAH what are you doing you cant be pissing off fairies" and they go no look and the fairy is in the cage blushing and giggling and going noooo im so tiny and helplessssss

[ouroborosorder]

I’m sorry I support all jokes but cave johnson would not be supportive of trans women

[ouroborosorder]

Due to a recent accident in the labs, the boys downstairs have found a way to turn men into women. Amazing breakthrough, and we wish you all luck on your transition. And your job hunt. You’re all fired. Sorry boys, nothing against you. We just don’t need women around here trying to clean up the lab while the men are trying to do real work. Cave out.

[astral-aquariums]

[pseudomantis]

the cambrian period was like 10 years ago

[toskarinarchive]

the cambrarin period was like 3 years ago

[magi-magi-tamamoland-chan]

the cambrian period is TOMORROW!!!

[powerburial]

$1,000,000 deposited into your bank account every day for the rest of your life or sex with Jafar?

[kevinmm6]

does jafar love me

[powerburial]

hell no bitch

[uncertainlys]

MY FINGERS BARELY EVEN TOUCHED YOUR STUPID FUCKING AD STOP REDIRECTING ME TO THE APP STORE

[golongbyjoannanewsom]

obsessed w this person in the replies

[wiki-but-made-them-up]

[astercrash]