They just don’t release the hounds like they used to
in my day someone just let the dogs out. never did know who.
noise dept.
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@tricksterkat209
They just don’t release the hounds like they used to
in my day someone just let the dogs out. never did know who.
Last year, I befriended a Catholic seminarian. We've gotten to be pretty decent friends. Seeing as he was staying in town for the summer and I wasn't, I entrusted him with caring for my plant.
He did a wonderful job, but as he was returning my plant to my custody, he explained "I watered her every other day, I gave her new dirt, moved her into the sunshine, prayed the rosary-"
"What?"
He looked at me, confused. "Isn't she a plant you pray with?"
"No," I said slowly. "She's a prayer plant. That's the... colloquial name of the plant."
Upon seeing his stricken face, I realized something went wrong. Turns out, this entire time, he's been including my plant in on his prayers and leaving her near icons.
Listen, totally cool. My plant becoming Catholic is a great deal for her not dying over the summer. But now I must navigate this interfaith household. Keep me in your thoughts.
#i love prayer plants but they're fussy so I don't keep them#can we have a picture op they're so pretty
Behold, Dorothea
(Naming my plant "Gift of God," and then giving her to a seminarian with just the explanation that it's a prayer plant? Okay, that's my bad.)
when you go to bed significantly earlier than usual, a little menu should pop up asking if you want Wake Up Early or More Sleep. and then you should get what you requested. that's my human body UI improvement for the day.
“Riddhi emerges from the Summer Palace. Once used by the Maharajas and visiting Heads of State to relax in between tiger hunts, now this is rightfully the tiger's domain.”
Riddhi after the birth of her cubs in 2023 Taken in Ranthambhore National Park, India Photographed by Tiger With Bobby
can we bring back the term "fair-weather friend" bc I feel like if fair-weather friends got called that more this whole argument about whether or not you should be there for your friends when it's inconvenient/at what point of personal inconvenience it's ok to bail on your friends would kinda fall apart bc like. we literally have a word for "friend who's only there when you don't need something from them" because the baseline expectation is that a friend should be there even when it sucks. like we used to make fun of people for bailing on their friends.
my friend was testing perfumes out at the store and she sniffed a bottle and anounced "ngl this bitch kind of sucks" The girl at the counter suddenly looked really sad, and my friend was like "I'm sorry, I wasn't talking about you." And the girl looked up and said "No don't worry, I didn't think that, but I just crushed a ladybug with my shoe" We both took a peak over the counter. she'd stepped on a red m&m
this post is like five posts per post
"its a living" <- guy who has a job it hates
"its'a living!' <- dr mario frankenstein
Good motherfucking god
OH MY GOD THATS EXACTLY WHAT ITS LIKE
EXACTLY
When I finally got medicated for ADHD, I asked why insomnia was such a problem for me.
The doctor paused, and then said, thoughtfully: "Well, you see, you also have ADHD at night."
It do be there at night.
looking for fics about your favorite character on ao3 be like:
dont care
dont care
dont care
what the actual fuck
dont care
ooh that sounds- what the fuck
unfinished
don't care
the best fic ive ever read in my life. this absolutely ruined me and ill never be the same ever again
dont care
Reblogging for the absolute brutal accuracy of this comment
And then you're like "fuck it, I'll make my own" and once you've done that you toss it into the goodwill bin to be someone else's prada or container of human teeth
And sometimes you gotta go with the container of human teeth purely out of morbid curiosity.
The container of human teeth is what I was looking for specifically. If you must know.
i miss when summers were normal and not literal hell
house of the blood-soaked sky
[ALT ID: A digital illustration where a messy swath of blood leads to a man standing with his hands folded over a saber's pommel. A partial solar eclipse glows behind his head.]
Hi, it’s me, your Flix Bus driver. I heard some of you back there asking why we’re on this dirt road in the middle of a cow pasture if this is supposed to be a direct line from Berlin to Munich. To that I say: you all need to mind your own damn business and look at the fucking moo cows.
actually kinda funny to me that fanfiction is known as a hobby for cringe 13 year olds because personally over half of the fanfic authors i know are married 30 year olds with mediocre admin jobs they attend to inbetween posting chapters of their latest gay sex epic adventure
you're familiar with "cats standing on keyboard" typing now try
"dog swiping nose across keyboard" typing
the nose in question:
Curious Polar bear (Ursus maritimus) standing upright and looking through porthole into the kitchen of arctic expedition ship M/S Stockholm in Svalbard, Spitsbergen, Norway by Andy Rouse
Hahaha that’s great. By the way, this is the picture of him with his head in.