i am jus. a simple lurker. have mercy

[eroscestlavie]

when you’re a gay lion and you accidentally tried to introduce your lesbian lioness friend to one of her own exes at a gay bar and she goes into the bathroom and bitches you out for not being able to tell her endlessly rotating cast of girlfriends apart which isn’t really fair because first of all they all keep dyeing their hair different colors and second of all she keeps getting back together with different ones at different times and meanwhile you’ve been “single” for like 8 months but are spending a lot of time with one specific guy who works at your old co-op and were going to excitedly tell her about it tonight but now you’ve ruined the whole subject of dating by trying to introduce her to her own ex at a gay bar (which is a watering hole. because you’re lions.) 

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

let's put Scooby and the gang in a genuine horror movie situation, i wanna see what these freaks are truly capable of

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

"didn't they already do this with—" no. put them in a slasher film. put them in a BLOODBATH. put this van full of weirdoes in a Texas Chainsaw Massacre scenario i have FAITH in them

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

THEY'D DO WELL IN SAW

[batneko]

okay I'm thinking about this

not Saw specifically but a slasher with a legit body count. Summer camp slashers are overplayed but I think it really works because it's the type of thing the Scooby gang WOULD get caught up in.

like some of the counselors didn't show up (got got) so the head counselor calls his younger cousin to see if him and his friends can fill in last minute. They show up and they're a bunch of nerds, one of them even has an anxiety dog, and they don't have a big role at first. It seems like the movie is setting them up as cannon fodder.

and then the deaths start and suddenly the nerds are locked the fuck in. The little one with the glasses actually fixed the phone line and is taking stock of all their supplies in case the vehicles go out. The counselor's cousin who seemed like a himbo has set up a perimeter and made makeshift alarms for all the doors and windows, knows all the entry points. The anxious one and his dog are keeping the mood up with the snacks and activities that were supposed to be for the kids, making sure nobody panics and starts making dumb decisions. Somebody tried to grab the redhead and she flipped him over and had him zip-tied before anybody noticed. Weren't they a D&D group or something? What is happening???

[lizardlicks]

Fuck the slasher movie just effectively becomes Home Alone but with Four Kevin McAllisters

Bro's fucked.

[ode-on-a-grecian-butt]

art by Daviddv1202

[dawen]

at one point the kid with the anxiety dog says, "man, why does this keep happening? this is, like, the eighth time thid year!"

it's barely June. abruptly all the normal councilors understand a) why he has an anxiety dog, and b) why the dog has anxiety too.

[twistedpictures]

dudes online used to spend 72 hours on photoshop uninterrupted editing people’s faces to look scary and we called the finished product some shit like jeff the killer and put him in spirit halloween and on wikipedia These days you open tumblr and top of dash is a 42 note edit of jerma’s face so fucked up looking that it could’ve been used to texture a corpse in a y2k valve game and you get a little nauseous and otherwise just keep scrolling. and this is known as “a tuesday

[uncertainlys]

MY FINGERS BARELY EVEN TOUCHED YOUR STUPID FUCKING AD STOP REDIRECTING ME TO THE APP STORE

[minttttttttttttttttttttttttttt]

sorry but this video is like a parasitic species to me

[minttttttttttttttttttttttttttt]

WONDERFUL news bestie

[dogpuppy]

I wish I could have heard you sing this… I bet you have a beautiful voice

[shrimpin-aint-easy]

Can you please just have an ounce of shrimpathy?

[loscharlitos]

[justsomeguycore]

horror movie showing a child’s drawing of the monster or ghost or whatever but instead of a little kid and crayons they’re like a preteen and it’s manga style

[halondrus]

[cutecipher]

can you put that thing on a leash?

[halondrus]

ok

[nekosaws]

reblog this to be an annoying faggot at ur followers

[pokemonheritageposts]

Pokemon Heritage Post

[cutecipher]

basketball players fight over the basketball because they are hypnotized before each game to believe it is their egg

[mevil]

[nehirose]

i'm still losing my mind over this, that is EXACTLY what the weed store in Splatoon would sound like.

[raccoonmilf]

Why does my dad text like this??? Who taught him this??

[powerbottombrucespringsteen]

The thing is nobody at pride is evaluating you to determine if you’re queer enough to be there because they’re too busy thinking “it’s so hot out” and “why is this lemonade 12 dollars?”

[dateamonster]

messed up that you can literally be better and nicer in every way and the adventuring party will still be like "waaa its a shapeshifter waaaa the real whatstheirface would never say that" like ok maybe i am a picture perfect copy of your friend that i imprisoned beneath the earth and replaced when you werent looking. so what. maybe they were a cunt. maybe i thought youd appreciate an improved version of your friend. with awesome eldritch tendrils.

[crabussy]

media trope that makes me want to throw up and cry is when a character realises there's no way they're making it out of a situation in one piece. and in a single moment they accept it and turn to their distraught loved ones with The Smile. you know The Smile. sickening

[crabussy]

PETITION FOR ALL LOVABLE CHARACTERS TO STOP DOING THIS SHIT. IT BREAKS ME.

[dogpuppy]