Welcome to Procrastination Station!

Lynn [too old for this shit] she/her/hers. love me some [somebody please help I can’t handle anymore character development. Why does the world keep making me grow and change. I’m so tired😭]

[beribeats]

Artist: _lixiangqian

[xperiane]

[neopoint-blog]

woah bitch the fuck was that for

[hungry-joe]

[everyluxoziatonce]

i let him hit cause. uh. well i’m gonna be honest it’s cause i fucked up my parry timing

[dragongirlsnout]

When you drink a minuscule amount of alcohol and still get absolutely wasted: Night of the Hog

When you drink a ton and yet feel nothing out of the ordinary: Night of the Wolf

[dragongirlsnout]

I reference this literally every time I'm at a bar because I somewhat convinced I saw it in a tumblr post somewhere but I have been informed that this is not in fact a known tumblr post in circulation and I was shown a prophetic vision at some point leading me to form the dichotomy from first principals

[natequarter]

i am going to get a bad grade in sleeping, something which is normal not to want but terribly easy to achieve.

[nat-20s]

extremely funny to me that Kermit the Frog is the only main overlap character between Sesame Street and The Muppets. imagine your day job is hanging out in a community of lovely people that genuinely just want to help kids learn and care about everyone so so much and then your night job is the reason that you have to stay up to date on your rabies AND tetanus vaccine

[nat-20s]

at noon the giant you're hanging out with is Big Bird! a wonderful fellow who likes reading stories and singing and telling fun facts! at midnight there's a giant named Sweetums who makes you feel like you're being hunted for sport

[nat-20s]

Ernie, trying to maybe come out to Kermit: well you know Kermit, me and Bert-

Bert: Bert and I

Ernie: Bert and I, we've been best friends forever, but we're also something else too!

Kermit, who every goddamn night has to tell Beaker and Bunsen to keep it professional, deal with Statler and Waldorf's bullshit, AND update his organizational chart on Dr. Teeth and the Electric Polycule: that's really great to hear fellas, happy for you two! :)

[stuckinapril]

They weren’t lying when they said that as an adult you have to fight for your life to practice your hobbies

[stuckinapril]

They also weren’t lying when they said that when you fail to do so your soul shrivels up inside your body and dies

[nepofledgling]

“do you really wanna be on that medication for the rest of your life :(?” yes actually I would love that. I know what I’m like off it

[punkrorschach]

no you don't understand. i *get* to be on this medication for the rest of my life :)

[autism-things-for-my-parents]

👆That

[stickthisbig]

Buddy, if you'd seen me off this medication, you'd start wishing I had a court order to keep me on it

[bunniope]

the cici's pizza mr pibb hits different

[iamoutofideas]

could you make up some more words please :)

[bunniope]

wawa gobbler

[iamoutofideas]

belly laughing while sloshing my chalice around in my many ringed hand

[halles-comet]

I’m just an easy mark for dumb pilot humor. Today the captain was like “we’re now at altitude, feel free to move around, my one rule is you must stay inside the plane” and I lost it. It’s funny because you would die a horrible death akin to standing unencumbered on Pluto

[fyodior]

a talking point i often see when defending the consumption of dark content is that it’s a coping mechanism for those with trauma which is very valid and true but i also want to make this abundantly clear: you can like dark content for no reason. you can enjoy fucked up shit in fiction because it’s enjoyable and entertaining. trauma is not required as a ticket for entry. enjoy your dark content bc it’s fun and sexy and don’t let anyone take that away from you

[amorphousgenderlesscryptid]

sometimes the reason is this

[robot-roadtrip-rants]

reblog if you love to see that shit that was fucking crazy

[rederiswrites]

There really really ought to be a book about how the staple crops of different civilizations shape and influence those civilizations, and I really want to read it.

[alexseanchai]

Salt: A World History by Mark Kurlansky and A History of the World in 6 Glasses by Tom Standage (three are alcohol, three have caffeine) are not quite that, but may still be of interest?

[rederiswrites]

I read Salt back in the day and it's so so good, second the rec. I have heard of 6 Glasses and not read it but I am sure I would probably love it. Gotta see if the library has it. Thank you!

[pandorasquillandquotes]

Gonna throw Empire of Cotton by Sven Beckert in the ring here! You'll never see the modern world the same way again.

[vaspider]

A Short History Of The World According To Sheep by Sally Coulthard blew my mind. So many things are tied to wool and sheep and weaving and so many words and phrases are tied to wool, people have no idea.

Example words which come from textiles/weaving, if not specifically wool (go look them up!): subtle, shoddy, tabby, Brazil, rocket, twit, warped, going batty, on tenterhooks, text...

[foxofninetales]

I'll throw in a rec for Pickled, Potted, and Canned by Sue Shephard - a very interesting look at food preservation and how the availability of different types of food preservation shaped cultures and cuisines.

[electronsprotonscroutons]

Sweetness and Power is this but for the topic of sugar

[magneticdeclination]

The Lost Supper: Searching for the Future of Food in the Flavors of the Past might also be up your alley. It's about "forgotten" foods and staples. They talk about different types of wheat, sauces, veggies, etc and a little about the cultures from whence they come

[writing-is-a-martial-art]

Me, picking at my wound: ow

Wound: what did you think would happen?

Me: I don't know. I didn't know. I wanted to find out.

Wound: well, this is what happens. You hurt and my work is done a little less.

Me: what work? Bleeding?

Wound: no, not-bleeding. You seem to misunderstand. I am not the violence. The violence is no longer in the body. My job is to be a wound - so that you won't bleed out on me - and then a scar, so that you can go on with your doing. I am not smooth skin, sure, but I am not the violence.

Me, suspicious: but you come from the violence. I remember. Perhaps if I dig in a little I will find the thing, the secret thing to pull out to heal all at once and to not even have the memory of violence, which is what you are.

Wound: what you'll find inside is just tired old flesh. There is nothing here but you. Even I is you. That's why you are the one hurt when you pick at my scabs. I am not telling you anything you do not know.

Me: but the knowing doesn't help.

Wound: yes.

Me: I am still unhappy with having a wound as opposed to not having a wound, even though I know that isn't the choice in front of me.

Wound: yes. You will just have to wait.

Me: for you to heal?

Wound: maybe, if I am a wound that heals all the way. I do not know. Perhaps you have to wait for my work to be as done as it gets and for the itch to stop. The itch, at the very least, will subside with time.

Me: okay.

Me: that sucks but, okay.

Me:

Me:

Me:

Me, picking at my wound: ow

Wound: what did you think would happen?

[ayy-junipei]

Yarn holder

[ayy-junipei]

The slurperrr...

[memeuplift]

[teaboot]

Nah man that's a northern bobwhite

[robinparravel]

I love Bruce

[molabuddy]

[i-draws-dinosaurs]

[the-real-numbers-deactivated202]

barista just asked me "... and who are you?" instead of asking "can I get your name?"

[the-real-numbers-deactivated202]

i didn't even do anything

[tsarina-anadyomene-deactivated2]

[catgirltoes]

And is the "bus in zero minutes" at the stop with us right now?

[withaninotay]

There is a light rail terminus where I catch the efficient but infrequent local express when I stay at my friend's place. There is a big bus loop for the busses that distribute people coming off the train onto the busses. It is very 'modern', with live update timing screens. It is also a public transit system rife with disappearing mystery busses. I learned (several swear words into the mounting horror of missing the last express) that the bus disappears from the live timing screens when it enters the bus loop, not when it arrives at the pick-up point.

Possibly never so relieved in my life that the disappearing bus was * right behind me *.