The Learned Soldier, Too

The other part of my blog where all non-history-or-reenacting related posts will go from now on. Follows from @thelearnedsoldier She/they. Queer as shit. Occasionally NSFW. Credit to @cadhla182 for the profile picture! This blog is trans, enby, ace, agender, aro, genderqueer, genderfluid, and all other queer identities inclusive and safe. If I accidentally reblog from a fascist please tell me and I'll delete it ASAP. Solidarity Forever! (PS, I earnestly hope this is never relevant but if I ever vanish for two months or more fully without warning, and no attempt to reach me by any means brooks a response, its is probably safe to assume the worst. I have people on here I care about, and I want to ensure they have closure--if I ever quit Tumblr it will be something I announce, and most likely, pin)

[thelearnedsoldiertoo]

Second (Semi)-Annual Sexy(wo)man Showdown

So about two years ago I did a goofy gimmick tournament to determine (scientifically, of course), which of my OCs was the sexiest. The winner surprised the hell out of me, but I have a lot more OC art since then, so we're taking the top 20 from last year, adding in 44 new contestants, and running a 64 bracket this year!

As before, I'll be adding the polls to this post as we go, so stay tuned!

Credit included for all artists, but have an @ for everyone on the roundup, too!

@cadhla182, @darksorcerer, @beedeux, @lesleylycan, @theoasiswinds, @mynqzo, @qsycomplainsalot, @eileenwdj, and @taureffelle, along with one piece by my friend Krys who asked not to receive an @.

The bracket was seeded by running a mini-tournament amongst my friends, so if any of these entries seem odd, blame them :P

Round 1: (COMPLETE)

Kadi Kidiss vs. Mhairi-Aunna Starsail

Calitha the White vs. Aynsleigh of Estwick

Granis vs. Xu Mai

Ayulì “Aya” te Tsongs'natxärem Say'älek’ite vs. Ali Ondasa'jega (Female Topless Nudity)

Aylwen of the Valley vs. Bia Hiṣa

Alor'a Nas vs. Neja Saidaull

Beligosa vs. Aliana Veth

Tsubasa vs. Netta Farel

Benalla Varletta vs. Juna Lienne

Ainne nic Leir vs. Eiko Saidaull

Cat Li vs. Maz'ara the Lioness

Ciara Tabris vs. V

Esthwyn of Rohan vs. Christian Lorenz

Anara Len vs. Kira Snowleaf

Sheogorath vs. Agnes Whiteharrow

Siwan Lavellan vs. 'Magister' Selena

Watcher Fenixia vs. Ayaana Arlakhovna

Bess Sherman vs. Danger Lorayn

Aiko Sakamura vs. Abna al-Aziz

Caite Shay vs. Tigress

Shao Zhu vs. Allarei'ja (Female Topless Nudity)

Abigail McCoy vs. Nomad Dunn

Diya T'Jara vs. Aífe of the Érainn

Sky Tallorin vs. Nyx Nas (Female Topless Nudity)

Oriana Santoro vs. Angelica Luis

Ardor Kilrain vs. Dolly Reddingston (Female Topless Nudity)

Adrinoth vs. Atso Kumaki (Female Topless Nudity)

Herru Izem vs. Nellie / Tallis

Ahnarra'lyn vs. Amrishara Nightbane

Aerona vs. Kyriana Vel

Rorianna "Rory" at-Kante vs. Balina Len

Morgan Rych vs. Saoirse McKinney

Round 2: (COMPLETE)

Kadi Kidiss vs. Aynsleigh of Estwick

Granis vs. Ali Ondasa'jega

Aylwen of the Valley vs. Alor'a Nas

Tsubasa vs. Aliana Veth

Benalla Varletta vs. Eiko Saidaull

Cat Li vs. Ciara Tabris

Esthwyn of Rohan vs. Kira Snowleaf

Sheogorath vs. Siwan Lavellan

Bess Sherman vs. Ayaana Arlakhovna

Caite Shay vs. Abna al-Aziz

Doran 'Nomad' Dunn vs. Allarei'ja

Diya T'Jara vs. Nyx Nas (Female Topless Nudity)

Oriana 'Echidna' Santoro vs. Ardor Kilrain (Female Topless Nudity)

Tallis vs. Atsuko 'Atso' Kumaki (Female Topless Nudity)

Ahnarra'lyn vs. Kyriana Vel

Rorianna 'Rory' at-Kante vs. Saoirse McKinney

Round 3:

Granis vs. Aynsleigh of Estwick

Aylwen of the Valley vs Tsubasa

Benalla Varletta vs. Ciara Tabris

Esthwyn of Rohan vs. Siwan Lavellan

Bess Sherman vs. Abna al-Aziz

Doran 'Nomad' Dunn vs. Diya T'Jara

Oriana 'Echidna' Santoro vs Atsuko 'Atso' Kumaki

Rorianna 'Rory' at-Kante vs. Kyriana Vel

Round 4:

Granis vs. Tsubasa

Benalla Varletta vs. Esthwyn of Rohan

Bess Sherman vs. Doran 'Nomad' Dunn

Oriana 'Echidna' Santoro vs. Rorianna 'Rory' at-Kante

Belated Semi-Finals:

Granis vs. Benalla Varletta

Oriana 'Echidna' Santoro vs. Doran 'Nomad' Dunn

VERY Belated Finals and Third-Place Playoffs:

Finals: Benalla Varletta vs. Doran 'Nomad' Dunn

Playoffs: Granis vs. Oriana 'Echidna' Santoro

[nigelgraz]

Comm 🩸🌑

[alatarielqueen]

[rory-flynn]

Assistant Powder Witch

I have finally finished this design and I'm mostly happy with it lol

[contemptible-scoundrel]

GUY WHO WEARS BOOTS MADE OF HUMAN SKIN: all my haters become gaiters at the tanning rack of success

[polarity-disturbed]

"We know it looks like a butt plug, just drink the water, it's hot outside"

Seriously though he's right, stay hydrated

[cryoverkiltmilk]

"Fill up," he says.

[dajo42]

using "what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament" to mean "yeah i made an embarrassing reference but you understood it which is also embarrassing" is very funny to me

[computationalcalculator]

my favorite part is that absolutely nobody says this except here. so if you use it in public, it's a dead giveaway that you spent the last ten years on tumblr. but then again, they recognized it, which means they were at the devil's sacrament

[idontgettechnology]

I tested this theory in the wild the other day at work. I was on a call with my department lead and a few other folks and I replied to an email the DL had sent me, thinking that, because he was on this call, he wouldn't notice when I sent it and would not catch me multitasking.

However, he replied to said email within five minutes, asking a question that required an answer. So I answered and was like "Also, I was going to apologize for answering emails during this call, but I see we're both here at the Devil's Sacrament, so I don't think an apology is necessary."

I watched him read that on screen and try not to laugh. And then at the end of the call as everyone started saying goodbye, he goes, "Hey, MJ, I meant to tell you. I like your shoelaces."

And I looked straight into my camera, stone cold serious, and said, "Thanks. I stole them from the president."

And the rest of the team was like, "What...the fuck...?" before he abruptly ended the call for everyone.

So now my DL and I know this about each other. He could be any one of us.

[libraryogre]

At a certain point, the appropriate response to "What were you doing at the devil's sacrament" becomes "stealing shoelaces from the president."

[sensiblereblogifposts]

Reblog if you were stealing shoelaces from the President

[mothnem]

Well what ELSE were we supposed to do at the devil's sacrament????

[drowningbydegrees]

I used to be president of a company and made a devil's sacrament joke in a company-wide meeting without really thinking about it. On the one hand, the number of people who got it made me feel less like I'd stuck my foot in my mouth. On the other hand, I was the boss of everyone in that meeting and that... sure was a thing we all had to know about each other for the rest of eternity.

[bigbluefishi]

Eowyn 🐴

[clonedroids]

Because I feel like kids of color don’t hear it enough: domestic abuse is not a part of your culture. 

A lot of us were raised with the idea that “its normal for wives/children to get hit! it helps them learn– only white folk don’t get beaten when they misbehave”. That’s not true, white people aren’t the only ones who deserve a safe and abuse free environment. Black and brown people can and do have loving families. 

If you’re in a situation where you are enduring abuse and people use your culture to justify it, I want you to know that what they’re telling you are lies.

[dragon-in-a-fez]

as someone who studies this: statistically speaking, child abuse (including “spanking”, because all forms of hitting children are abusive) is pretty much equally prevalent in households of all racial, ethnic, and cultural backgrounds. so yeah, don’t let people use the “culture” excuse on you, but also, don’t believe others are experiencing it less just because it’s less normalized in their culture to talk about it. we all gotta work together to fix this shit.

[brown-spider]

All the black & latino ppl who joked about Miles Morales saying “Whatever” to his parents, saying that he should “know he cant get away with that like white kids can” and “lmao did he forget that he’s black/has a latina mom???”

You aren’t better behaved because your parents beat you. “Knowing your place” did not make you more dignified than white children, you were being needlessly abused.

[good-4-her]

[good-4-her]

simply dont monday

[yaldabaothadeez]

(Source - Unreal Fish on bsky)

[faber-niet]

Typically soviet 3-liter glass can filled with Coca-Cola

[pissvortex]

grasps this in my big fat red palms and drinks the entire thing in one really loud gulp

[thelearnedsoldiertoo]

And when you're done, well...

[faber-niet]

Typically soviet 3-liter glass can filled with Coca-Cola

[pissvortex]

grasps this in my big fat red palms and drinks the entire thing in one really loud gulp

[cyanocittae]

my friend keeps sending the groupchat voice notes of her eating bussy and calling it "asmr"..... bro go study for your physics exam 😭

[cyanocittae]

hi sorry uh. incredible miscommunication on my part lmfao.

my bad yall

[sockssquishiiii]

CAW CAW CAW

CAW CAW CAW

[papayajuan2019]

i'm close ☹️

[papayajuan2019]

[thesecretuncle]

Im being edged at Aldi

[comvi]

my hearty nand nutritious meal of Screws and Bolts