I think one of the most frustrating aspects of being bisexual is that whenever we speak about an issue that we’re facing, an observer always needs to pipe into the conversation and talk about a minute sliver of privilege that SOME SELECT people in our community can experience, and then peddle this information like it is a global fact, and that it is universally applied to every single bisexual to ever walk the face of the earth.
Not only is this incredibly offensive and insulting to bisexuals who are trying to voice our oppression, it actively harms us and in turn re-enforces that very same oppression. Having to self police ourselves and make sure that whatever specific biphobia we’re speaking on includes the ‘necessary’ disclaimers so that monosexual folk feel validated in their own victim complexes and biphobic beliefs is exhausting, alienating, and utterly pointless.
Our oppression as the bisexual community does not fall away when we bring in the marginal amount of us who experience privilege. It is far more productive to turn our conversations about straight passing privilege or cis bisexual woman into conversations detailing the protection and safety of our bisexual siblings of color, or trans siblings. It is much more productive to talk about how the american queer community is going to rally behind the trans community as we are currently and quickly heading towards a genocide. It’s more important to show solidarity with queers in the global south, to stand up against colonization and exploitation and the american empire then it is to complain to a bisexual who is speaking out about their oppression about how bisexual women who bring their boyfriends into a queer spaces are privileged and need to devote all of their time and energy into making sure you feel secure in your status as Most Oppressed Queer.
and don’t you think for a second i haven’t noticed that most of you who perpetrate this disgraceful behavior, who constantly talk over and down to bisexuals are cisgendered white westerners. don’t think i haven’t noticed how you abandon community that doesn’t coddle you. don’t think i haven’t noticed how utterly superficial and simple your notions of queer theory and history are. don’t think i haven’t noticed how you berate and disrespect people who are checking you and offering you a chance to take accountability for your behavior.
this is what keeps bisexuals from safety and inclusion, this is what perpetrates the astronomically high rates of domestic violence, interpersonal violence, sexual assault, poverty, and depression and anxiety that bisexuals experience. This is what keeps over seventy fucking percent of the bisexual community closeted. This is what keeps bisexuals from being able to access asylum and refugee status. THIS IS WHAT KILLS US.
This is what makes me have to step up and teach myself my own fucking erased history. This is what makes me have to be my own fucking queer elder. This is what makes me look at bisexual youth and feel so much pain and fear for them and what they will have to experience as they grow up in a world that does not accept them and a queer community that does not care about them.
Stop speaking over us. Stop hijacking our discussions and conversations, Stop letting bisexuals be discarded.
LOS ANGELES — In the middle of the rainbowy revelers at the pride parade in West Hollywood, Jeremy Stacy was questioned: Are you reall
