Adler kisser

I'm so normal about Russell Adler. trust me bro.

[vanityfracture]

✩ WELCOME !!!! ✩

Main blog: @ehlno-fey

Names are Bell/Faye/16 and I'm 19 yrs old :)

auDHD, HC-DID, cluster b/c, schizospec, etc.

fluent eng. + learning ger/rus/ukr

Adler selfshipper + Bell fictionkin

This is a sideblog for me to post stuff about my writing and fanfiction! I sometimes share theories, headcanons, and ideas too

I'm severely mentally ill and have been through some very extreme forms of trauma. This frequently bleeds through into my writing.

Discourse apathetic

Some stuff I post/reblog will have adult content. I usually won't tag it, so follow at your own risk

Adbell, adcase, casebell, and p12 enthusiast

COD, Postal, and TES fan (+ more)

Gen AI users of any kind get mauled on sight.

my ao3 ♡ fic masterlist ♡ tag guide

[vanityfracture]

Bell headcanons

eng. pronouns are they/it/he

rus. pronouns are он/его (they will attack you if you use она/её on them)

intersex, genderqueer, trans man, bi, aro

birth name is Mariya

name given to them by Perseus is 27

chosen name (after the canon events of bocw) is Alexei. most of their close friends either call them either Lex or Lyoshen'ka though

auDHD, BPD, ASPD, DID, and either schizoaffective or bipolar

hypersexual and has a lot of self hatred for it

fluent in English, Russian, German, and Ukrainian, but also knows a bit of French and Spanish

was brainwashed from a very young age by Perseus, and what the CIA did was just modifying what was already there

generally doesn't feel human due to trauma and mental illness, but doesn't know that identifying as nonhuman is an option

has a strong dislike of religion, especially Catholicism, and they refuse to talk about why

extremely attached to Adler but also kinda hates him. they think he's arrogant and a bit insufferable, but still cares about him a ton

bites people when they're either frustrated, can't find the words they want to communicate, or to show affection. it's rarely ever clear which it is until after they're done gnawing on the person's arm/hand/shoulder

secretly is a smoker and frequently steals cigarettes from Adler when he isn't looking

loves terrible, low-budget horror movies

tends to make "too much" eye contact

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16 shot dead in the bronx for posting too much about adbell

[cuunos]

*takes a bite of my cigarette*...... heh. the character...... *walks into a small puddle but it swallows me up like the ocean* *i am found dead years later in maine*

[isabelopaque]

Im tired of not speaking my truth to stay uncouth. We simply must torture The Character in perverse and cruel ways for my enjoyment and pleasure. Guards begin

[eldr1tch-cr0w]

number one rule! never believe ur thoughts after 10 pm . unless its about The Character then believe all of your thoughts wholeheartedly

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Can't stop thinking about my BOCW AU and how it effects the relationships between characters, especially in terms of adbell.

I NEED everyone to be terrible but have fully valid explanations behind why their behavior is so shitty.

I NEED Bell to be just as bad to Adler.

I NEED to almost feel sympathetic when Bell and Adler hurt each other, no matter how bad it is, because it's all that both of them know how to do.

I NEED Bell and Adler to weaponize each other's trauma and mental health issues to win arguments, as leverage to get favors, or just because they think the others' reactions are funny.

I NEED Bell and Adler to fight like a toxic married couple that's in denial about needing a divorce, and I NEED them to make it everyone else's problem.

All of this is for scientific purposes, of course.

[luna-azzurra]

Amnesia Prompts!!

☆ "You keep looking at me like I should remember you. I'm sorry. I'm trying."

☆ "They told me who I was. I don't recognize that person at all."

☆ "You loved someone who wore my face. I don't know if I can be them again."

☆ "Don't tell me everything at once. Let me find some of it myself."

☆ "I know I'm supposed to feel something when I look at you. I'm waiting for it."

☆ "You're a stranger to me. The saddest part is I can tell I wasn't to you."

☆ "My hands remember things my mind doesn't. That terrifies me."

☆ "Everyone keeps telling me who I was. Nobody is asking who I want to be."

☆ "I fell in love with you twice. Once before and once just now."

☆ "You kept everything. Every photo every letter. What do I do with that kind of love?"

☆ "I don't remember our history but I remember how you make me feel. Is that enough?"

☆ "Don't grieve me while I'm still standing here. I can't bear that."

☆ "I lost my past but I still have a future. I'm trying to focus on that."

☆ "You're the only thing that feels familiar and I can't explain why."

☆ "I know I loved you. I can feel the shape of it even if I've lost the details."

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Talking to my therapist about whether or not it would be safe/healthy for me to write about something makes me feel like a victorian writer consulting the heart beating underneath his floorboards

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⊹ WIP Wednesday ⊹

Here's a small section from chapter 3 of my current adbell fic!! I would share something from chapter 2 but it isn't truly a WIP atp so it would feel like cheating to me

If you're interested in reading what I have posted on ao3 so far, you can do so here!

This is my first time posting something for this, so I apologize if it seems off or anything like that!! I'll figure it out eventually lol

The remaining stretch of the building between him and the office of the one truly trustworthy person in his life felt like it took forever to go through. Adler still felt a bit dizzy from the episode he had earlier that day, so he tried to focus on moving around without looking like he was on the verge of collapsing onto the cold tile floor.

After nearly tripping over his own feet a few more times, he was there. Something in the back of his mind forced him to hesitate before letting himself in. 

'Maybe this was a mistake. It's probably nothing and I'll just be wasting Park's time.'

Still frozen in front of the door, some sort of voice showed up in his head to scold him for not committing to what he had planned.

'Get over yourself. You need whatever help she's able to give you.'

Hearing that shocked him in a way that completely dragged him away from his conflicting thoughts, forcing him to focus on processing what just happened instead.

The only way he was able to rationalize it to himself was that he somehow gained a second internal monologue completely separate from his own, which he had no control over

The voice spoke again, growing increasingly annoyed, 'Go on, coward. The longer you stand here like an idiot, the more embarrassing it'll be to see her. Plus, we're already late because someone forgot how to walk without looking blackout drunk.'

Trying not to question what was happening in his head any further than he already had, Adler whispered, "Whatever." and silently pushed open the door to Park's office.

[vanityfracture]

The author's curse strikes again (I have a cough)

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NPD Adler x BPD Bell aaaand hit post

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Just woke up from a dream where I was Adler and Hudson kept bothering me about how he wanted me to install Factorio onto his laptop

[peach-pot]

voted “guy most akin to a well-behaved dog at the function” third year in a row.

[vanityfracture]

Gonna be posting something for WIP Wednesday for the first time tomorrow. Rubs my hands together like a fly

[vanityfracture]

Bell surviving the assassination attempt and being left wondering what went so wrong.

They were nearly killed by the person who reinvented them, who gave them a second chance to live, even if it meant he fully rewrote their memory and sense of self in the process.

Not knowing what they did to make Adler shoot them hurt more than the actual bullet which had just barely missing their heart.

What made the situation nearly unbearable, was that they saw him in everything. No matter where they went, they couldn't escape the thought of him.

The smell of cigarettes, silent walks in the woods, the tapping of rain against the windows of their messy apartment, and even the taste of blood when they would bite too hard while anxiously chewing on the insides of their cheeks.

All of it reminded them of him, bringing them back to the only point in time where they truly felt like there was some shred of meaning to their life, beyond just taking up space.

[frailbug]

you think that you're so alone in the world then you read literature from hundreds of years ago and you realize that other people have always felt this way