The Glorious Show

hi.

[onlytiktoks]

[piedude]

[omtai]

Man I miss free the nipple. Its getting warmer and we don’t even have free the nipple anymore

[gramarye]

feminism has backslid so hard in recent years people don't even know what free the nipple means anymore

[nbarpf]

One of my all-time favorites

[kholran]

It’s finally happened.

After almost a decade on this site, I found another Tumblr user in the wild. I stopped to tie my shoe with rainbow laces this morning outside the silversmith at Colonial Williamsburg, and I heard it.

“I like your shoelaces.”

Oh. Oh no.

I responded the only way I could. “Thanks.” And then I reluctantly added, “I stole them from the president…and if that makes sense to you, I’m very sorry.”

The poor man, in full Colonial dress, stared at me for a long moment. And then burst into laughter. And said, “I haven’t thought about that in YEARS and this has never happened to me before.”

Yeah. Me neither. Not until today.

Tumblr rite of passage. Achievement unlocked.

[beggars-opera]

@victoriansecret I found your friend!!!

[beggars-opera]

[vixvigil]

it’s never a normal temperature anymore it’s always some fucking bullshit

[transmortifried]

idk why people are still trying to do "hear me out"s on tumblr

you could talk about wanting to fuck the space needle on here and people would still call you a poser for insisting on fucking "conventionally attractive architecture" as if that's a coherent, easily-recognizable category

[charlesoberonn]

I want to fuck Antoni Gaudi's unbuilt Hotel Attraction skyscraper design

[anatomizer]

"hear me out" and it's a picture of the most fuckable building you've ever seen. c'mon now.

[thepersonalmossblog]

“hear me out” and it’s the fucking dildopolis

[maidthings]

secretary birds look pretty normal but for some reason people have collectively decided to photograph them like they're [takes a moment to find an acceptable way to say this] women

[maidthings]

<-normal bird photography | typically reserved for pin-up posters ->

[maidthings]

[hcnnibal]

just got back into gardening so i’ve forgotten. are basil leaves supposed to be this big

[hcnnibal]

am i the problem

[mousegirlheart]

op are you a hobbit

[hotvampireadjacent]

Insane

[c3rvida3]

Me and my cousin have an ongoing bit where we pretend we made "slightly better" versions of things where we'll be like.

"That was a pretty good movie, but not as good as my movie, House of 1001 Corpses," or "I guess this song is okay. Kind of reminds me of a song I'm working on called 'Faster Car'."

Never once has it been funny or made anyone but us laugh.

[mucmucvi]

This reminds me of a joke I have with two of my cousins

[jan-liliten]

op turned off reblogs but also i respect that they turned them off for a reason but i still want the post here so i removed their name

[depsidase]

[godblessthesickos]

World historical loser

[drwiltz-official]

[cheaphalloweencostume]

i literally thought me & this guy were on the same side until the last sentences i was nodding along fondly 😭

[cheaphalloweencostume]

[orteil42]

being some fucking guy on tumblr is so crucial for me it keeps me humble and, importantly, stupid

[dark-fri3ren]

[echokelly]

I love it when people describe something that's too big as "fuck off". like this thing is so large. leave.

[hellsitegenetics]

String identified: t c tg tat' t g a "c ". t tg ag. a.

Closest match: Halichoeres bivittatus genome assembly, chromosome: 3 Common name: Slippery Dick

(image source)

[katjohnadams]