The Kind-Hearted Pervert

♥︎ He/she | 19 | 18+ only sideblog ♥︎

[vortigauntboobs]

Welcome to Sex World

nsfw/18+ sideblog for @xarpilled. Lesbianism 👍

Rules

Probably goes without saying but minors dni. If you follow this blog as a minor I'm gonna block you from not only this blog but my main too. so don't do that

im single but if we don't know each other then please don't flirt with me. If we DO know each other (e.i. if we're mutuals or we've had at least one 1-on-1 conversation) then go wild but don't feel rejected if I don't respond its just cuz I'm shy

This is a nude free zone (including dms do not ask for or send me nudes)

have fun and be yourself

What to expect

Aliens, monsters, and furries of all sorts

Posts that aren't really horny but are about nsfw topics [tag: #pervert musings]

Posts that ARE mindlessly horny [tag: sexposting]

Occasional objectum stuff (mostly sewing machines and other machines that could hurt me badly)

A truly unprecedented amount of sex jokes

[first blinkie by @/blinkees, second made by me in blinkies.cafe]

This post will be updated in the future sooo keep that in mind. Last updated: April 28th 2026

[iloveuppers-deactivated20251030]

im balls deep in your blog right now and im not pulling out

[outofcontexttomodachilife]

(submitted by @themainspoon)

[madnessofmen]

starting a collection. I'm calling it autistic sexting

[lizardsister]

[sisterreisaid]

[badassdemonsword-deactivated202]

jerking off has been mid lately

[frankiedotbiz]

[writing-prompt-s]

You mention to your co-workers that you think the bronze statue that you pass by everyday on your way to work is such an eyesore. Their only response is “What statue?”

[commanderchrist-deactivated2017]

Huh, that’s weird, I think to myself.  I hope I’m not going senile.

I went home early from work that day.  I dry humped my pillow until I came and fell asleep watching The Tick, starring Patrick Warburton.

[boybeetles]

Anyone have more of these so I can add them to my collection

[hairy-legged-vampire-bat]

[punctilobula]

whoever came up with shaving pussy should be put to death

[parkchanwoohoo]

I beg my kidnappers for a phone, swearing not to make any calls or texts, and they stare over my shoulder, holding a gun to my head as I use my newly-freed hand to post, "So do like, dudes just buy ropes and baklavas from the same store or what lmfao like a specialty Crime Store"

One of the kidnappers says "balaclavas" but it's muffled under the fabric. I ask them to repeat and they do, their voice raspy from disuse. "You wrote baklava, that's a pastry." The other kidnapper goes "stfu" and then after a pause goes "Why would you buy from a crime store"

[godisafujoshi]

Then they spit roast me

[parkchanwoohoo]

I didn't wanna say this but now that someone's left this kind of comment I have to be honest: Everyone else's tags are funny but this is the only person who understood my vision for this scenario

[heartbreakhalo]

[tamamita]

you will f**k increasingly large creatures

[wakingfromthewater]

Still thinking about this mobile game ad I got. You will f**k increasingly large creatures.

[hunted-seraphim]

i heart weed, transgenderism, and jacking off (preferably at the same time)

[tomhoppusdelonge]

i love following people with kinks I don’t have because somtimes I’m like

[teratocrat]

there's no cock anymore no ones getting dicked down ever again they just announced that the last cock was found and sucked by a fisherman in argentina

[nationwidedornermoment]

[datura-inoxia]

AGUANTE EL PESCADOR CHUPA PIJA LOCOOO 🇦🇷🇦🇷🇦🇷🇦🇷🇦🇷🇦🇷

Que grande amigo, agarraste el último zodape de la tierra, te banco mil.

[monster1994]

happy june everybody i hope you get fucked and/or sucked this month

[kazokuhouou]

what if we don't wanna be?

[monster1994]

then i hope for peace

[vortigauntboobs]

I apologize in advance for bringing my relationship troubles onto the sex jokes blog, but I have some thoughts I want to speak into the void so bear with me

With the power of hindsight and distance, ive come to fully internalize how fucking weird my ex was about porn and sex work. Before I go on about how they were weird about it I want to make clear that I don't think its like, A moral failing on their part necessarily. I know enough about them to understand why they felt the way they did and sympathize with it-- but at the same time it's like. Idk how I'm supposed to reconcile with the person I'm dating being firmly and loudly anti-porn and pro- criminalizing sex work. Especially when the people responsible for paying the bills and such in my living situation *make porn and do sex work*, which they knew and continued to be anti porn, and act like "even if [my roommates] say they enjoy the work they're actually suffering and being exploited because sex work is inherently exploitative no matter what!!!" Like. Idk I feel like I know how they feel about it better than you do? And then they were always complaining about how they kept accidentally reblogging from radfems and swerfs and being confused as to why 😭

Idk how exactly to conclude this but like. Idk I hope they don't hold those views forever. Ok thanks for reading and sorry again