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@waitingfortheend-tocome
Crucially #myshane plays to his twentieth season which is just long enough to have the experience of meeting Ottawa's new draft prospect, also named Shane, and to smile and jokingly say, "Hey nice name," and for the rookie to gulp and say, "Thank you sir I am named after you" and that makes Shane sit in his stall and stare at the floor between his skates for. Significantly too long to be healthy.
they are just so incredibly cute together :â)
 i tried to be funny and it backfired miserably
itâs 2014 itâs time we moved on as a nation and stop reblogging this
every person who reblogs this in 2015 is gonna get their ass kicked by yours truly
it will forever be a little insane to me how ilya rozanov, born and raised in russian, total jock/party bro, father-is-police-brother-is-police guy, somehow has never had an ounce of internalized homophobia in his body. canonically just saw being bi as an extra opportunity for hot sex. started experimenting with guys at 16 and simply never questioned it. and like yeah heâs a top but itâs also so clear that he does not see being a bottom as a demeaning or less masculine thing in the slightest. this man goes on to wear leopard shirts and booty shorts and flicks his hands gayfully and makes gay jokes at his jock colleagues and being tender with other men is like second nature to him and Heâs actually the one to makes the âoh are you scared of being gay?â âcuz I thought you might be gay when you were sucking my dickâ jokes.
this man this mannnn i want to pick his brain apart with a tweezer
"unbecoming" is such a great word. bro that shit was so rude you no longer Are
Ok guys so how many times did brand-new immigrant teenage Ilya Rozanov try to bribe Boston cops?
âThe employees need a larger salaryâ âhmmmm large celeryâ
hayden gets ahold of lilyâs number and asks her directly why she and shane arenât in a relationship yet, itâs been years after all
lily: why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free
hayden: excuse me?!
lily: what can i say, i am career woman i do not want to âsettle downâ
lily: but his dick is just that good
lily: his mouth too
hayden: okay stop i donât want to hear more
lily: no no you brought this on yourself
lily: now let me tell you about his hands and his strong thighs and his stamina
A reason I like asshole/scary Shane is I like imagining that Ilya has no fucking clue what anyone means by that. Because Ilya's one of the only people on the planet who isn't intimidated by Shane's looks and hockey skill, since he also has both. And he's not put off by Shane's insane commuication style because he's also terminally avoidant, and also an asshole, and Slavic. And he doesn't see the full brunt of Shane's dismissiveness because Ilya Rozanov exists in the warmth of Shane's gaze
Idk there's just something so funny to me about everyone else being like, "Yeah man....that guy is scary as fuck. I once watched him watch tape for 15 minutes straight without blinking. I played on the Mets for three years and he only ever called me by my number" while Ilya is twirling his hair and doodling "Mr. Hollander âšâ€ïž" in his notebooks in gel pen and imagining Shane as a particularly strange and cute little animal that he can poke to see how it reacts
Everyone: Shane Hollander is so scary. Just ruthless. If you fuck up during practice he pulls you aside for âhelpful tipsâ and itâs the meanest shit youâve ever heard in your life interspersed with âbut good job buddy, youâll get it next time!â Grown men skate off the ice crying. Once I missed a pass and he sent me a detailed analysis of everything I could have done better, annotated, to my house, via courier. My wife opened it. I invited him to grab pizza and he asked if I felt my processed carbohydrate intake was having a positive impact on our cup chances.
Ilya: Skill issue.
i mean. yeah i guess.
''i wasted those years'' who cares. you lived the only life you could've lived in those moments
I think people have truly lost any ability to be patient with storytelling.
âI donât understand thisâ Theyâll explain it if you wait.
âI donât like how this episode left things hangingâ Thereâs a continuation next week.
âThis character is flatâ Wait for them to be fleshed out.
So many of the complaints I see about shows lately are people being confused by things THAT THE SHOW WANTS YOU TO BE CONFUSED BY THATS THE FUN OF MYSTERY AND FORESHADOWING YOU ABSOLUTE GOBLINS THE MAIN CHARACTER IS ALSO CONFUSED AND THEYRE GONNA DO A BIG REVEAL AND EXPLANATION LATER IF YOU WOULD JUST FUCKING WAIT
april 2010/april 2026
oh i'm sure
laughing about the idea of ilya doing one of those puppy buzzfeed interviews and then anya sniffing him when he gets home and feeling SO betrayed
and shane meanwhile is having a great time pressing the accelerator on this guilt trip
cuddling anya and just, "i know, huh? papa left and played with WHO KNOWS HOW MANY other dogs, and the whole time you were here missing him"
ilya, who is lowkey devastated: "hollander, this is not a joke."
"no, it isn't, huh, anya? you're so, so sad now."
"...hollander PLEASE. anya, i am sorry-"
"it seems like he's saying something, but we can't hear cheaters, can we, anya?"
"HOLLANDER"
To my 25 - 35 year olds, you've reached the age where people around you are starting to give up on themselves because they think it's too late. Don't let that energy rub off on you. It's not too late.
incredibly funny of shane hollander, notorious for ALWAYS deferring to a professional about decisions, to keep it going even with his sexuality.
rose went "oh yeah, i've dated tons of gay guys. you definitely are one." and shane went "oh thank god, an educated opinion about the matter."
man truly just needed a subject matter expert to sign off on things to be gtg.
