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@weelek
2020 we survived 2021 we endured 2022 we developed 2023 we THRIVE amen
2023 energy
I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I - the alphabet as seen from the side
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ . _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
the alphabet as seen from directly above
unfortunately i dont think its queerbaiting if the creator is just so terminally heterosexual that they never remotely considered the same gender relationship their show is centered around could be read as romantic. it is deeply painful however.
Maybe accidental queer baiting? The way someone may not mean to say something rude, but it may come off rude, so it's rude. Frustrating either way.
Not being a dick, just a friendly clarification.
By definition you can't accidentally queerbait. Queerbaiting is specifically using a same sex pair from the show to market the show to queer audiences with no intention of ever following through on a romantic relationship.
There is officially licensed Destiel merch signed off on by Kripke. Teen Wolf had a commercial with the actors for Derek and Stiles draped over each other talking about being "on a ship." Both shows actively used scenes between them as marketing while actively mocking fans for wanting them together. Sherlock has multiple characters refer to Johnlock as a couple, including characters we're supposed to believe are never wrong about human behavior and pushed those scenes in marketing. Then they acted insulted when fans saw them as a couple.
That's queerbaiting.
Done on accident it would just be queer subtext. Done because they had no other choice due to censorship is queer coding.
The specific meaning of the word is really starting to get lost and it's a pretty important one to keep accurate. It describes a very specific phenomenon that was done repeatedly and maliciously for decades and is meant to examine that specifically.
Doing it on accident sucks, but it isn't a tactic of capitalism intentionally intended to suppress queer representation while making money from queer fans.
Reblogging to keep the accurate definition and examples of queerbaiting circulating in the world
Hanahaki disease is a psychosomatic illness. It's a thing that your body does in response to stress over constantly repressing/concealing your feelings in settings with high background magic. It's like you've been ignoring pain for a long time and suddenly your vision starts going dark, because your affected body is just YANKING on random alerts trying to get you to PAY ATTENTION there is a PROBLEM. Yes the flowers do really exist. So do non-magical psychosomatic symptoms. The flowers aren't special.
This does of course open up the trope to options for non-romantic concealed feelings. Which I think is great. There is something viscerally satisfying about the person who seems so outwardly chipper coughing and hacking and spitting up Depression Flowers so now everyone has to know they're hurting. Isn't there?
Hanahaki, but it's a child that feels neglected by their parents.
Hanahaki, but it's someone whose friends have started ghosting them.
Hanahaki, someone's wife is cheating on them.
Hanahaki, the disease that gives you three options: confront your feelings, destroy the love you hold for someone or perish choking on roses.
Imagine this for transness
This feels less like a data harvesting thing and more a way to grift ($1000*number of babies born) into companies of Trump's choice
Okay. I was on my beloved AO3 and I saw something that made me do a double take. So, now I really want to know…
What is your AO3 user ID?
I’m an OG user 5 digits or less
Six figures baby!
I’m in the millions…
I’m so curious to see how long people have been on AO3! I know some people have been on there since beta/invite only, but I would love to see what the number is on tumblr!
You're asexual? But...
“but sex is what makes us human!”
in 1916 a French officer in his twenties writes his
doctoral dissertation under
heavy mortar fire.
he sends it by mail, a page
at a time, to his wife.
a week before he’s to step up to the podium and
defend his work rather than his country
he is killed in action.
even as the bullets rip
through him he still wishes he could have become a professor
in French literature and
the university awards him a posthumous Ph.D.
sex is
a woman breaks down in tears on the phone because
a week is not enough time to
get over a breakup.
her sister drives an hour across town,
comes up the front steps with
a gallon of ice cream and some beer
and together they eat moose tracks and marathon
every
single
Godzilla movie
ever made.
sex is
she’s late for work but her car isn’t
starting and even through her coat and hat she’s cold.
she knows she can’t be late again because she’s missed
one time too many already because her
father’s nurse was sick with the flu and someone
needed to help him bathe.
the clock ticks past fifteen after and she hits
the wheel like it’s a heavy bag as though that will help
steps on the gas like the car will go
and wonders how she will pay rent
and how she will feed her father.
sex is
it takes three people to hold the predator down because
even with the cover over his head
a bleeding eye and shattered wing
he is trying to hurt them.
none of them have seen this bird before in their lives but
they bandage his wing and head and give him a painkiller and
put him in a warm place to sleep and heal because
it is right.
at first he is paralyzed and cannot
fly but soon he is taking steps
and then fluttering, and then soaring, and
six months later he is whole and healed and hunting.
once he is gone they never see him again
which means they’ve done their jobs right.
sex is
in 1969 a girl watches grey-and-white footage on her parents’ tiny television and
can’t quite believe that what she is seeing is not a movie set but
another planet.
the men on the screen look a little like
aliens with bulbous heads and no faces and fat
marshmallow arms
but they are still men.
her mother puffs on a cigarette behind her and declares that
this is progress
even if it was just a small step.
the girl grows up to be not an astronaut but a secretary
and her boss calls her ‘sweetheart’.
but sex is
a boy is taught that real men don’t cry so
he doesn’t.
when his best friend dies from a self-inflicted
gunshot wound, he locks himself
in the shower every day and sobs under scalding
water until it runs cold
so nobody will see him grieving
so nobody will see that tears are just love that
has no place left to go.
he learns to dull love rather than suppress its expression and
soon the owner of the liquor store knows him by name.
three DUIs, two evictions, and twelve steps later,
he is feeding people at a homeless shelter,
and telling them it’s all right to cry.
Sex is
the broken man tells the comedian
that he didn’t mean to step in front of the car but the rain
made it hard to see.
he seems okay but his leg
does not.
the comedian clutches a grubby receipt with the driver’s
plate number scrawled on the back
in pink pen, stands out in the rain so the broken man
can have his umbrella,
and gives him the comedy routine that ruined his career
so the man doesn’t think about the pain in his leg.
once he’s out of the hospital, the fixed man sends him a thank-you card
with kittens on it.
what makes us human
yawning is contagious,
and there is a species of bird whose young we call “pufflings”.
melodic collections of sound, spaced by silence,
can move us to tears.
the tallest building in the world is
two-thousand seven-hundred and seventeen feet tall.
in less than eighty years we went from our first powered flight
to touching the moon,
and in one-hundred from the first phone call
to instantaneous connection between thinking machines of our own creation.
we make pies out of tree organs
and let cow’s milk ferment until it hardens and then
we put them together, because apple pie with cheddar cheese isdelicious.
what makes us human is
the earliestfossils of anatomically modern humans are
two-hundred thousand years old .
we have had pet dogs
for sixteen-thousand of those years, longer
than corn
or the wheel.
the steps we take are part of
one of the most energy-efficient gaits the
animal kingdom has ever seen.
we invented the concepts of love
and hate
and justice, and mercy
and we invented the language to convey them.
we sharpened rocks, then metal, to convince other people
who don’t hold the same idea of those things as we do
because we think
it’s right.
we are two hundred millennia of love and disappointment and
sorrow and innovation and
mercy and kindness and dreams
and failure
and recovery.
“but sex is what makes us human.”
(Huntr/x's penthouse apartment, sometime hopefully in the near future)
Rumi, checking her emails: Bills, fanmail, bills, stupid ad deals, something that probably should have gone to Bobby, fanmail... oh huh. Someone is asking if they can make a parody of one or more of our songs.
Mira: People already do that, don't they? We encourage it.
Rumi: Yeah, but this guy's asking anyway.
Mira: Huh. That's considerate of them. Who is it?
Rumi: Some parody artist named Alfred Yankovic.
Mira: Oh, I think I've heard of him, isn't he kind of a big deal in the states-
Zoey, kicking open the door: YES YES YES TELL HIM YES A THOUSAND TIMES YES A MILLION TIMES YES LET HIM DO WHATEVER HE WANTS WITH OUR MUSIC
Mira: Definitely a big deal.
Zoey: ASK HIM IF HE'S DOING A POLKA MEDLEY PLEASE I NEED TO HEAR GOLDEN ON THE ACCORDION THIS IS A DREAM COME TRUE OH MY GOSH DO YOU THINK HE'LL LET ME CAMEO IN THE MUSIC VIDEO-
Rumi: So... we tell him yes?
Mira: We tell him yes.
Zoey: EEEEEEEEEEE WEIRD AL KNOWS WHO I AM THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE
weird al would absolutely let zoey cameo in the music video and the honmoon would be strengthened for probably another generation
Al: So the plan was just to have Zoey in the ballroom dance scene of Olden.
Interviewer: Well, we definitely saw her there.
Al: And of course, when one of the male dancers showed up and was six foot five, we had to pair them. I'll never say no to an easy visual gag.
Interviewer: So is that when you had the idea for the throw?
Al: Absolutely not. We just told the dancers to do some basic spins and end it with a dip during the climax, but apparently she got inspired. We did not tell Zoey to lead him during the dance, and I certainly didn't plan for her to throw him in the air and catch him in a dip. Fans say they can see the wires, I guarantee you we did not provide wires during that day of shooting.
Interviewer: But surely she didn't actually throw him?
Al: She also rapped the bit from Hardware Store during the lunch break, so anything is possible.
A goblin and an elf have decided to defy tradition and get married. Their ceremony will be held in the magical forest in accordance with elven tradition.
It's a beautiful ceremony. The elven bride in her finest, flowing silks, dappled by the sun. The goblin bride in a human-sized wedding dress stolen from a goodwill.
The elven side of the aisle of course has the elvish bride's father and mother, as well as her older sisters, as well as all the forest animals who inhabit her parents' court.
The goblin side is a bunch of The Labyrinth looking freaks in their best simulacrum of what they think good folks wear to weddings. The father of the bride is wearing a really snazzy cocktail dress.
It's a mixed tradition ceremony. The elven part of the ceremony involves the young couple being presented in front of the king of the forest, a majestic unicorn, who blesses the couple by touching them with his horn.
The goblins kidnapped a local priest to bless the couple according to their tradition.
The ring the elven bride presents to her wife-to-be is brought in by a squirrel riding a doe. It's made of silver, inlaid with decorative golden leaves.
The goblin worst man accidentally swallowed the ring, which was purchased from a pawn shop.
The father of the elven bride keeps looking over to the goblin side of the aisle, barely hiding his disgust. But he is resigned to it. What matters most is his daughter's happiness.
At the end of the ceremony his face sinks as the father of the goblin bride says "Welcome to the family! You can call me brother," while vigorously shaking his hand.
The reception is, of course, held at a speakeasy according to goblin tradition. The ceiling is only five feet tall, making it very difficult for the elves.
"An elf walks into a bar,"
"Will you please stop saying that!"
During the reception the father of the goblin bride, named Frankie the Third, decides to introduce his family to his new elven family.
"These are my older sisters, Frankie the First and Frankie the Second. No relation."
"What does that mean,"
#the father of the elven bride is absolutely disgusted by the goblin's dad#right up until he's got some of that good goblin ale in him and then they're both singing old shanties together#'i am amazed you know this one! it must be far older than you - we sang it hundreds of years ago!'#'yeah i ate some old musty book full of songs once and i think that was in there'#'...okay!'#they're superbowl dad buddies afterward
You understand my vision
My favorite bit is it sounds like @thydungeongal is there and they're live tweeting the wedding.
I love the implication that goblins are incredibly well-read because they keep eating pure information 📚
You should see my uncle who once ate a stack of porno mags
He ate them for the articles.
But he spit out all the nasty prepositions and gerunds.
"The goblin worst man accidentally swallowed the ring, which was purchased from a pawn shop." Riiiiiight. It was "purchased".
This is the priest's eighth goblin wedding. (There is some contention over whether one wedding counted as it became a race to finish the vows before the groom finished giving birth and it became a christening)
He is dumped out of the burlap sack and begins "We are gathered here today..." without hesitation. Two goblin children have to be restrained from running up and climbing him because he's their favorite god-uncle. The first time he was kidnapped he was terrified and had to be prodded (literally) to say the wedding vows to the happy couple. The second time he was kidnapped, he spent the entire time protesting that this didn't count and argued with the mother-in-law about what should be said and was repeatedly cowed into submission. The third wedding he was delirious from lack of sleep and when uncle drunkenly demanded he hurry up, the priest snapped and went into "fire and brimstone" mode declaring that a sacred union of love was not to be disrespected in such a way and incorporating it into his blessing upon the union before resigning himself to death. Unfortunately for him, the goblins loved it and he immediately became the most preferred priest in the region and was dragged into the community celebrations completely against his will. He pretends to pull a ring from behind the bride's ear to make up for the missing one, and sincerely tells the couple that he knows that they will be very happy together before he crowd surfs to the exit. Wild applause erupts.
I love everything about this.
I would like to know the responsibilities of the Worst Man
The Worst Man is a coveted position at all weddings ("Man" being a translation of the goblin person, of course, can be any species or gender) because it's so much fun. It's the Worst Man's job to break all the tension.
Groom is terrified he's going to lose something? Worst Man loses it first.
Bride has some nasty relatives she wants kept out of the wedding because they object to the other bride? Worst Man plays bouncer. Meaning they bounce the offending parties clear out of the county. Occasionally out of the time zone.
Caterer is fretting about the cake? Worst Man falls into it and wrecks it.
Father-in-Law is worried about Uncle getting drunk and saying something stupid? Worst Man gets drunker and draws all the attention.
Officiant gets stage fright and can't speak? Worst Man heckles them until they get angry enough to talk. (See "third wedding" above.)
Jealous friend saying rude things about the bride? Worst Man just dumps barrels of red wine on her until she shuts up and/or leaves.
After one's spouse, determining your Worst Man is pretty much the most important choice for a wedding.
i tried to be funny and it backfired miserably
it’s 2014 it’s time we moved on as a nation and stop reblogging this
every person who reblogs this in 2015 is gonna get their ass kicked by yours truly
World Heritage Post
and, look, I’m not complaining, not at all, but this is why it’s very important to be abundantly clear and specific with your Etsy witch.
NOT THE CRABS WE EXPECTED BUT STILL SOME CRABS WE DESERVE!!!
Celine, the girls, and Bobby all playing among us together!!! I don't think people write enough of Bobby and Celine being friends and it's sad
Celine and Bobby would be the most devastating and diabolical Imposter duo on the planet.
People would think Bobby can't lie or play devious for shit (which, fair) but most also forget Bobby was also in the Idol Industry(in this hc he was) for a bit so bro knows ball like you wouldn't believe.
More importantly, Bobby and Celine were bro's long before Huntrix were a thing. They're best friends. Dumb and Dumber even.
He's her rock, she's his feral cat he can't really tame but she doesn't scratch or bite him when he gets close to her.
weeks 11-20 on my weekly poster challenge this year, crazy I've actually managed almost half a year of getting these done. 1-10 here.
Look I don't think Supergirl (2026) is secretly a perfect masterpiece or anything (I personally thought it was like. a 6/10 fun time) but I do think it's wild that Tumblr isn't going crazy for it because this Kara is one coattailed suit away from being a Tumblr sexyman. she is the flawed messy female character people have supposedly been clamouring for. she's the popular archetype of a gruff self-destructive alcoholic middle-aged man begrudgingly having to look after a kid and growing fond of them but genderswapped and also 23. she's allowed to be visibly messy and kind of gross and her hair is constantly all over the place and she literally cries, screams, throws up, and pisses onscreen. she's caustic and mean and puts up an act of carelessness but has a heart of gold. she's heavily traumatised and coping with it terribly. if anything happens to her dog she will kill everyone in this room and then herself. she spends most of the movie in a trench coat and baggy band T-shirt. she gets into bar brawls and breaks a guy's hand. she is Going Through It 24/7 and looks the part. she stabs a guy in the throat. how is everyone else not obsessed with her.
My possibly controversial take is that in an au where Zoey and Mira find out that Rumi is half demon pre-canon I don't think they would be as supportive as they are in post-canon. I don't think they would hate Rumi or be disgusted by her patterns per se but I think they would fall into the same line of thinking as Rumi and Celine that the golden honmoon will remove them and everything will be fine.
What do you mean this isn’t canon? (12/?)