Here to fuck the achoo

27 | She/Her | Minors DNI | Congratulations you abominable human being, you've found my jack-off stash ;)

[izythesnzy-deactivated20250806]

being able to hear how much snot someone’s got in their nose when they sneeze is such a turn on 😖

[sneeffles]

i didn't really think about this kink for, like, a while. and then the last couple weeks my brain has been like. i have Got to get sneezed on. Or I'll Die

[n0seferatu]

everyone be sure to opt out of tumblrs ai scraping. not me tho. im going to give this robot a sneezing fetish. as the prophecy foretold.

[shouldibless]

The word "sneeze" 😍😍😍😍😳😳😳😳🥵🥵🥵🥵

[gemsden-deactivated20250211]

someone scrambling for a tissue to cover with but they don't make it in time and end up sneezing all over the tissue box, inadvertently passing on their cold to the next person who just wanted a tissue to clean up a stain

[poor-darling]

A satisfactory cold sneeze should:

-spray everywhere

-come after a long hitching build up

-leave thicker mess trailing down their philtrum until it's hastily wiped away

-hurt their nose, throat, and head

-be loud, vocal, embarrassingly high-pitched, helpless in tone

-be incompletely caught in a tissue or cupped hand

-witnessed by somebody else, perhaps many someone elses

-make them feel even sicker than before

-be powerfully, disgustingly contagious

[ithadtobesneezing]

me when someone sneezes with their hands cupped over their mouth in real life: ugh ewww ew you touch things with those hands

me when someone writes some random guy doing it on tumblr.com: this is so fucking sexy. this is so fucking hot

[ayatheworld]

cool gender neutral alternatives to say to your partner instead of bless you!!:

“wow that was really cool do you want to have sex”

[umglittersnz]

questions for the community pt 1

if u love ur partner n wanna marry them and all that… but they never sneeze/ their sneezes don’t turn u on wyd

[creasedbridge-deactivated202309]

Is it just me or is the whole of snzblr just down with some illness right now

[blooming-trees]

Cold-ridden cutie at the airport, desperately trying to hold back sneezes and not draw attention to their miserable self, but the need to sneeze is so strong they just can’t hold back much longer… they think they can maybe stifle discreetly as they bend to pick up their bag from the conveyer belt. Of course, instead what comes out is a very wet, and very messy, and loud sneeze (or several), completely uncovered, all over their bag. 

Which they then, to their absolute horror, realises is not theirs, but belongs to a complete stranger, that they now sheepishly have to hand the sneezed-on bag over to while wishing desperately for the ground to open up and swallow them because can it even get more mortifying…?! 

… oh yeah, it probably can. ^^

[whispsofsmokee]

Don't ask me how I get hit with these memories but

I once read an submission in reader's digest of a woman shouting out to her significant other. (There used to be this part in the back where people could send the magazine funny little blurbs to be published, I forget what it's called.) Anyway, she mentioned that she knew he was someone special when she came down with this massive cold early in the relationship and he came over and wasn't grossed out and took care of her/held her tissues for her.

Remembering this has me like... holy smokes, she was with a snzfucker.

[snzzenby641]

HGTTSHH-uhh!

Ugh…PLEASE disinfect that when you’re finished

Thank you for your concern..snf..

[welpsomehowigothere]

cw: irl illness, mess

Bf likes to rub his nose against my face, neck, or shoulders when we cuddle as usual affection. But rn he's got a cold so when he does that, he sometimes leaves a small streak of snot on me, followed up with a wet sniffle 🥴

[welpsomehowigothere]

Update:

I definitely caught whatever bug he had. Not surprised though, he didn't exactly cover his coughs and sneezes either. Luckily haven't had any sore throat or cough so far, only fever and nasal symptoms. Since I feel so weak, each sneeze just absolutely wrecks me.

[accidentalmistress]

I'm sure this has been done before, but have a silly meme I made.

[hockeynoses]

a dismayed groan of, “oh god, it’s everywhere,” that follows a massive, messy, spraying snz

[welpsomehowigothere]

cw: irl illness, mess

Bf likes to rub his nose against my face, neck, or shoulders when we cuddle as usual affection. But rn he's got a cold so when he does that, he sometimes leaves a small streak of snot on me, followed up with a wet sniffle 🥴