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🕷️ 18+

[whorisharachnid]

sometimes i make stuff - heres stuff i made

[mtfoss]

I do suffer the american condition of liking to drink huge drinks

[luxwing]

Lemme get a little sippy

[bisexualadamparrish]

saw this post & blacked out for 30 minutes & came back to awareness having had created this. the creative urge overtook me.

[likesplatterpaint]

What a privilege it is, to have both labs curl with their backs against my spine and legs

To know that for soft creatures, I am sweet safety

Even though

I am

So very warm

and need to stretch mine leg

[likesplatterpaint]

Update:

What a privilege it is to have your arm be the resting place of one small furry face

As your leg dangles off the bed

Lifting accusatorily

As you turn like a rotisserie chicken

Only to dissolve in tender kisses

That you would prefer were not. On. Or in. The mouth.

[clockworkrobotic]

when i was a teenager i used to catch myself thinking "i'm really glad i'm alive right now because of all the cool personal technologies that exist" and when i did i'd think it through and reckon that well, its not like teenagers in the 70s and 80s knew they didnt have ipods or facebook or whatever. they were also happy with the tech they had. and i'd reason that in the future there would be more fun technologies that i dont know i'm missing out on right now and the future will be an even cooler time to exist

anyway i was dead fucking wrong about that last part. i hate personal technologies now. i miss having an ipod that doesnt advertise shit to me and i miss when my htc wildfire didnt harass me 45 times a day to install an ai assistant and then install it anyway when i say no and i miss when the internet wasnt 5 websites all of which i have to log into and i miss when i didnt need an app to talk to my landlord. sorry past me you were actually right about 2009

[goldensunset]

>‘this thing is too generic and tropey’

>look inside

>forefather of that genre

[firestorm09890]

[frankbelloriley]

[rocketbirdie]

guys. Guys please you're allowed to say big boy words. please we cannot keep just rolling with the sanitization of every space on the internet ok. you're allowed to say suicide. you're allowed to say porn. they're not bad words, they're just words.

also by ''censoring'' the words with silly spellings you're actually making it much harder for people to filter out. please just say Sex you don't have to call it woohoo like it's the fucking sims. i promise the Word Police aren't going to arrest you

[npd-vriska]

hello gay people

[npd-vriska]

As a generic end of year holiday gift, I am finally giving Tumblr the hornier version of this edit.

[tvandfilm]

The Watermelon Woman 1996, dir. Cheryl Dunye

[princess-of-phyresis]

they're selling anti-ai slogans on sweatshop-produced t-shirts. i don't need to write the poem for you to get it do i

[hypotheticalpeople]

guy who plays albums on mute, it was never really about sound for him as much as feeling a sense of progression through a series of named durations

[headspace-hotel]

[deslizada]

man sometimes friendship really is just "I saw this and knew it would give you psychic damage. please respond with agony" and then they do. and it's great

[molabuddy]

the magic growing dinosaur and the housefly (happy make a terrible comic day!)

[no-terfs-no-swerfs-no-fascists]

We have no choice but to stan a queen 💪❤️👑

[themainspoon]

Trying to escape military service like: "Poison Seller, I require your weakest poisons."

[dumbtrannybitch]

it's actually so amazing she helped save the lives of the honorable men who did not wish to fight, while killing the most vile men, that is so fucking based

[unalivejournal]

Reddit post: Hey I'm thinking about pursuing this career does anyone have any advice for my path?

Comments: This job is hell my life is hell don't do it. I wake up every morning for work and hold a gun to my head while doing deep breathing exercises. Find a time machine and go back to 1979 if you even want a chance of getting a position. Prepare to move 5000 miles away. You will be paid one penny per hour for the first 15 years and your days will be 12 hours long at minimum. Being dead is better than doing this profession

[berlynn-wohl]

[tlirsgender]

Hi it's me your cat coming at you again with Yucky Wet Sneeze

[normielesbian]

I will never be able to fully express how being a lesbian is not considered cool and sexy to average people, who aren't terminally online. It considered especially disgusting to people when you're a woman who doesn't look like a super model or actress. People are shocked and appalled at the thought you want to eat the pussy of an ordinary girl whose like a waitress or something. People are grossed out that two women who might be fat, masc with stretch marks/scars or without makeup etc find each other completely attractive and have completely fulfilling sex for themselves. Lesbianism that is devoid of the male gaze repulses people. It's why lesbians are rarely fully represented in media. It's not sexy anymore if it's not two straight thin decorated actresses directed by a man. They so mad when we want each other and don't care to meet their beauty standards or need their approval.

[systlin]

Getting down on my knees and thanking the humans who invented dishwashers and washing machines.

[ihonestlydontknowwhattocallthis]

InsNe that dishwashers are more efficient and easier than just washing them manually but they also use less water. It’s a win win situation

[systlin]

They ALSO sterilize dishes, due to operating at a far higher temperature than human hands could ever tolerate. It's a win every way.

[systlin]

Made this post about 15 minutes after the repair guy who fixed the pump on my dishwasher packed up his tools and left, as the dishwasher was whirring along doing my dishes from that morning.

He said the exact same thing, which I did not know before that, so spreading this knowledge.