Hodge-Podge

I'm just a tired gay trying my best • Her & She

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

Just had a fag moment

[jturn]

In America they call it a smoke break

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

im american this post is about sucking cock

[dojacat]

[toedenandbackagain]

Crowley absolutely had a hand in perpetuating the idea that snakes are terrifying and gross and scary- not because he believed it, obviously, but because if people liked snakes on any level that they liked kittens or puppies, or soft adorable things, he’d never be left alone when in his other form and he’d have people trying to touch him or -Someone forbid- pick him up. he feels maybe a little bad for the rest of the snake population but you need to do what you need to do. 

But of course, humans are humans. And one day he’s coiled up in the bookshop on a chair, and a human wanders in and he prepares for the screaming and the panic and he’s secretly pleased because two birds/one stone. he gets left alone and Aziraphale will be pleased Crowley made a customer leave. He keeps his eyes closed, but slithers a little. Just enough for the sun to catch on his scales. 

He hears a sharp intake of breath. He prepares himself for the cacophony of horror. Once a woman had knocked over an entire book shelf in her haste to exit the shop upon encountering the ‘pet snake’ of the owner. 

“SNEK BOY!!! LOOK AT THIS LITTLE DANGER NOODLE!!! OH MY GOSH AREN’T YOU A BABY!! A BABY!!!”

[rainydaydecaf]

Aziraphale’s phone rings.  He answers, expecting it to be Crowley.  But to his surprise, it’s a demon he’s never met.

“I’m Crowley’s replacement,” the demon says.  “He’s not done anything impressive lately, and Downstairs doesn’t like how ineffective he is at keeping you in line.  So now he’s shuffling paperwork and scooping up hellhound shit while I do his job for him.”

“Ah… I see,”  Aziraphale says icily.  “Well, I most assuredly do not look forward to working with you.”

The demon laughs.  “Feeling’s mutual.”

Twenty-four hours later, the demon is very surprised to find himself discorporated in his sleep.  He can’t explain what happened, he has absolutely no idea.

“Don’t let it happen again,” Beelzebub says, annoyed, and sends the demon back up.

After a mere three days, the demon ends up discorporated again.

A new replacement is sent up.  This one lasts for a week and a day.

A third replacement is sent up.  This one lasts for exactly four hours.

Three demons are sent up next time.  Two manage to stay alive for at least five months.  In that time, they botch four very important temptations, and the citizens of London inexplicably find their daily lives much improved in thousands of little ways.  Traffic and pollution are nonexistent, injury and illness are miraculously avoided.  Church attendance is up five hundred percent, and every politician and CEO is struck by the urge to donate as much money as possible to charity.  There’s a general feeling of contentedness and goodwill in the air that wasn’t there before.  It feels downright heavenly.

Suddenly, Beelzebub is having a very hard time finding anyone to take Crowley’s post.  Bribes and threats make no difference.  The rumors have spread and only grown more disturbing in the telling.  Not one demon is willing to go up there and face the cold, calculated, merciless wrath of the angel known as Aziraphale.

Crowley absolutely loses it when someone gets around to telling him.  “Y’know, I could’ve warned you,” he says gleefully.  “Been working with him for thousands of years.  I know exactly how much of a bastard he can be.”

After running the numbers and seeing how many souls they’ve lost to Heaven in the past year, Beelzebub gives up and concludes that trying to replace Crowley is a massive waste of resources Hell can’t afford.

After one year, Aziraphale receives another phone call.  He answers, with bated breath, and nearly shouts for joy when he hears a familiar voice.

“Hi, angel.  Lunch on me?”

[ineffableplan]

OP this is exactly, completely, my kind of Aziraphale characterization I’m in love with this little fic

[imposer]

[beysexuality]

Me ripping off this stupid fucking sheet of paper so I can watch static for 5 hours

[dykemuth]

crowley adores anathema bc 1. she’s unhinged 2. he’s absolutely sure he can convince her that the earth is a cube and 3. she’s the only person who will willingly call him “AJ” and he thinks that’s delightful

[dykemuth]

people are really tagging this anathema x crowley oh my GOD he gay dude stop it lol

[bob-belcher]

I hear he does remarkable things to oysters. I’ve never eaten an oyster.

[kedreeva]

….I . I cannot believe I didn’t notice this before. I cannot- holy shit I swear every time I look at any part of this entire fucking show everything gets better.

Look at that third gif. Look at the way he moves his head as he begins to grin. That’s a little challenge. That’s 100% absolutely “you’re supposed to be the one tempting me, shouldn’t you get started?”

This wasn’t a mix up at all. Aziraphale’s just a brat that put a toe over the line to see what Crowley was going to do about it. Crowley had just admitted that he was in town for a quick temptation, and Aziraphale looks at what a bad mood he’s in and must conclude “oh it’s gone poorly” and he proceeds to take the first opportunity presented to him to give Crowley a chance to do some successful tempting. Of him.

[strawberryjamm13]

The look on his face in that third panel! Snipped out this way it’s so obvious!

[echosilverwolf]

Absolutely on purpose.

[b99network]

[cryoverkiltmilk]

The face of a man who has taught his son too well.

[mendokayalways]

top 10 anime betrayals

[gardevoir]

theyre married

[zekuromu]

u kno in da good omens opening when they look like this……

 it is good

[danasauurr]

A little good omens comic that goes way back! it took me a long time to finish but i did it! There’s not much to it other than the fact that I wanted to draw a younger version of Aziraphale and Crowley, 

Crowleys name is suppose to be gibberish for all those that can read greek lol. 

[pinkpiggy93]

Ahhh, my heart…

[forineffablereasons]

the juxtaposition of michael sheen’s portrayal of aziraphale, where all his best details, his best expressions, are centered in his eyes - the flitting glances up and down crowley’s body in paris, the lingering gazes on crowley’s mouth throughout the wall scene, the softness and kindness in his eyes when he deals with mary hodges and adam young both, the intensity of his eyes when he looks at gabriel in that last trial scene (that’s crowley, but it’s him being aziraphale, and it’s still michael sheen underneath lol), the way his gaze flicks to crowley when he says “luck of the devil” and crowley double takes at him, the pain in his eyes when crowley leaves the bandstand - aziraphale holds himself quite stiff, very often holds his hands in front of him, bound together, and while he does have various big expressions like the gasp in 1941 or the gavotte smile, michael sheen’s portrayal places aziraphale’s soul in his eyes - we see more of the hidden pieces of aziraphale through his eyes, the things he’d probably rather we didn’t 

juxtapose that against david tennant’s portrayal of crowley, which relies on so much outside his eyes - his movement of his mouth and forehead and eyebrows become dramatic, the baring of teeth, the raising of his brow, and then of course his entire body comes into the picture, that distinctive walk we’ve all yelled so much about. when we do see crowley’s eyes they’re so open and vulnerable - in many cases dramatically enlarged, even - much like the rest of his expressions. david tennant’s portrayal of crowley is a portrayal that can’t help but give itself away, despite not seeing his eyes - the crumbling face in the bar scene, the devastation at the bandstand and on the soho street, almost shocked, the soft smiles on the bench and in the ritz, you know the ones, and the one, very bright, very big smile after the paintball scene. david tennant’s portrayal gives you everything everywhere else because he so often can’t give you the eyes, or he can’t give aziraphale the eyes - we see more of crowley’s eyes when he’s alone than any other time - so the soul of crowley is lodged everywhere else. you don’t need the eyes to know him. 

it’s a very cleverly done juxtaposition and really reinforces, actually, how together these two characters are meant to be, that, as michael said in an interview, they really don’t exist without one another. they fill in the spaces the other has left empty literally. it’s very cool and very fascinating to watch and very chef’s kiss. 

[forineffablereasons]

once aziraphale’s allowed, once he’s unleashed, he is going to have such a plethora of stupid petnames for crowley. first because he’s affectionate naturally, but primarily because he likes to watch crowley blush and fluster his way through it. dear boy and darling are the obvious ones. he knows he’s only going to get away with cupcake once, so he makes it count by saying it very loudly and very publicly when somebody gets a little too flirtatious with crowley, which, worth it. he uses sunshine but only first thing in the mornings. sometimes when he gets drunk he calls crowley favourite person which makes crowley blush something fierce and giggle. gorgeous and beautiful are certain sorts of names for certain sorts of moments, and they make crowley clutch at aziraphale and draw him closer. and sometimes, when the nights are quiet and soft and crowley is half-asleep on the sofa, aziraphale brushes his hair back and says let’s go to bed, sweetheart. 

crowley only ever calls aziraphale angel. not because it defines aziraphale, not because it defines their differences. not because aziraphale’s divine. he calls aziraphale angel because when crowley was afraid, aziraphale lifted his wing to protect him. when crowley had to do bad, aziraphale saw in him the good. when crowley was going to give up, aziraphale gave him a hand and the courage to go on. aziraphale loves him, truly, without question, without caveat. aziraphale chose him, will always choose him. aziraphale isn’t just any old angel. aziraphale is crowley’s angel. 

[forineffablereasons]

crowley saves aziraphale from a prison and from a church and if that isn’t a fucking queer mood 

[forineffablereasons]

aziraphale always rejects crowley first, it’s part of their dance, part of their routine. crowley suggests the arrangement as neither doing anything, aziraphale rejects it, crowley reframes it as helping each other, aziraphale agrees. crowley asks for holy water, aziraphale rejects him, crowley reframes as dangerous for him, aziraphale agrees. crowley suggests they raise the antichrist together, aziraphale rejects it, crowley reframes it as thwarting evil, aziraphale agrees. 

crowley suggests they run away together, aziraphale rejects it. crowley reframes it - hell knows it was me! and aziraphale rejects it again.

crowley had every reason to believe that aziraphale was going to give in eventually. that’s the dance. i’m sorry, whatever i said, i didn’t mean it. now get in the car. he’s panicked, but he is still trying to complete the dance. crowley might have expected the bandstand break-up as par for the course, but crowley doesn’t really understand that aziraphale is really, actually rejecting him until he tries a second time, because he’s always had to try a second time. but aziraphale says no. maybe for the first time ever, aziraphale gets to the end of the dance, and he still says no. you can see crowley finally realize it too: 

he looks like he’s been shot. i suppose in some way he has. 

[asparklethatisblue]

Helping Crowley get dressed, or not. Based on this post

⭐️ Commission Info ⭐️ Ko-Fi ⭐️

[g0dtier]

americans are wild.

theres a convo on reddit going on rn abt how europeans see americans working conditions and a bunch of americans are like "its really not bad unless you work an entry level job, i have a medium wage job i got with my degree and i get about 15 days of paid vacation a year and i even get some sick days and can accrue more, the people complaining are low wage workers who should get something better"

like. you realize that for a fulltime job 20 paid vacation days are mandatory here right? and that even entry level job offer more paid vacation days? and that any ot you work gets paid more AND counts as more vacation time right? like if your work week is 38 hours and you work 40 hours a week you get paid overtime AND an extra paid 12 vacation days a year right? and that sick days are mandatory to be paid by your employer right? that theres no limit on sick days, right?

you realize that what youre listing as good benefits is literally the bare minimum here right?

[mickeymarie]