Welcome

Please leave your shoes and your opinion at the door.

[statsdead-deactivated20200602]

mario cast reacts to you being sentenced to life in prison

mario: “thats-a too bad [y/n]… so long gay bowser!”

luigi: “fuck”

peach: “thats just terrible [y/n]! i’ll back you a fucking cake”

bowser: “the justice system is inherently flawed lets escape to my castle and have SEX!!! yar har har!!!! >:)”

yoshi: “why did you do it. WHY did you take the chaos emeralds. ANSWER ME!!!!!!!!!!!!” *kisses you in frustration with a lot of tongue* *baliff drags him out of the courtroom*

toad: “i can and will kill for you [y/n] just say a name and i’ll see it through i dont fuck around prison won’t stop me and it won’t stop you”

wario: “You cant go to prison [y/n]!!! I’m…… i’m pregnant. And its yours” *gets an abortion while your n prison* “i got an a-bor-tion”

waluigi: “god all of this court business has got my cock simply throbbing!!! Waluigi time ;)”

daisy: “BALIFF!! Whack his pee pee!!!!”

[catchymemes]

[ooopsiepoopsiedidafuckywucky-de]

This is so pure

[wilwheaton]

This is the most wholesome thing.

[skootdawg]

Sperm whale mimics a spinning diver.

[gallusrostromegalus]

Humans: *encounters Earth’s Largest Carnivore, who would could swallow them whole, probably*

Human: … Spin?

Earth’s largest carnivore, with a brain that weighs almost as much as this naked beach ape*: SPIN!

[regaldragonempress]

WHAT DO YOU MEAN SPERM WHALES ARE CARNIVORES

I THOUGHT THEY ATE KRILL AND STUFF LIKE OTHER WHALES

[gallusrostromegalus]

Nope! Sperm whales eat extremely large deep-sea squids, like the Giant and Colossal Squids. They have also been known to opportunistically eat dead whales, sharks, and seals, but not actively hunt them. They got real big teeth for it too:

However, they only have teeth on thier bottom jaw!  they have corresponding holes in their top jaw for the teeth to lock into, which makes hanging onto a slippery, boneless squid:

It should be noted that the human here isn’t in particular danger of being eaten on purpose, but an accidental swing of it’s multi-ton head, a clip from the teeth, or being directly in the line of it’s sonar could seriously injure or kill them- Divers that have been in the direct line of echolocation for a sperm whale calf have described being hit with the soundwave like “being kicked by a horse” and some have suffered internal organ damage.  Sperm whales, like other large whales, aren’t particularly aggressive towards humans, but they are still very large wild animals who behave in unpredictable ways.

I know that in US waters, it’s illegal to intentionally come within 300 yards of any whale or dolphin, and if one appears closer you should turn off your engine or stop paddling to avoid accidental injury to you or it.  This human is doing something dangerous and ill-advised, but it’s still hopeful that we can love something like a 130,000 lb deep-diving, squid-eating Oceanic former ungulate.

[extremelyloudgamerkeyboard]

Im.sorry I’ve lived my entire life not realizing that echolocation could possibly be felt and I have to come to terms with the fact that whales have sonic attacks

[marsapartment]

I’m losing my shit avhsqafgshssb

[yahenni]

Flanos

Flanos

Flanos

[yahenni]

[ingridverse]

Fake flanboys at it again

[peer2peer2peer-deactivated20210]

[peer2peer2peer-deactivated20210]

[slightmood]

my dog after I “struggle” to win tug of war and let go of the stuffed animal

[cruzfucker]

the walking dead, game of thrones, and breaking bad were just superwholock for men

[cornfield-cryptid]

Game of Walking Bad

[thehighwayphantom-deactivated20]

[lycanthrop-ee]

why the fuck is this so funny

[porterr-robinson]

[nightmare-grass]

Why is this the funniest thing I’ve ever seen

[fooodforthot]

[xandrakeart]

Visit Original Link

hey uhhhh has anyone done this yet

[busket]

some, once, the worl gonna (INHALE) i aint arpest the sheh. he was kinda a thing and a the shape and L her four. WELL, they coming and coming, rules and out running. temps not to bun, you’re pot but you’re dumb. so do so muh so whats wro aching the. and if you don’t. (record scratch) and if you dont…

you’re an! get cha! go! ey! you’re a! get the sh! get ey! all that glisto! shoot staa go moe…

it’s a -tsk- and they colder! you’re now, wait older! but the men beg to, judging by the h. satellite. the ice we’s. getting pretty, waters getting might as well. worlds on! how bout. thats the way never get

you’re an! get cha! go! ey! you’re a! get the sh! get ey! all that glisto! shoot staa go moe…

(random discordant whistling and record scratches)

you’re an! get cha! go! ey! you’re a! get the sh! get ey! all that glistooo!!! shootn staa….

some once a spare change for need to self a this place. i said ye! what a cons. i could you a fuel mas. we could use a…CHAAAAAY! WELL!  they coming and coming, rules and out running! temps not to bun, you’re pot but you’re dumb. so do so muh so whats wro aching the. and if you don’t. (GO!) and if you dont!!!

you’re an! get cha! go! ey! you’re a! get the sh! get ey! all that glistooo! shoot staa go moe! n’ all that glisto! shoot staa go moe!

[thyrell]

this is a they might be giants song

[saxifraga-x-urbium]

Is this what having a stroke feels like

[valtsv]

my

is to

and then act like i don’t know

[tastefullyoffensive]

[b0ggyb1tch]

I would die for Pepper

[1234567865432345342343464-deact]

the he cookin edits are the only thing ive laughed at on this site in months

[1234567865432345342343464-deact]

does this not make you absolutely lose it

[davidgouldthorpe-blog]

I’m sorry but I won’t be able to take Ready Player One seriously. We’re supposed to believe a worldwide online forum where you can be anyone and anything would look like this

when in real life the concept has turned out far more like

[wasatch-wendigo]

Thank god that film had no cultural impact whatsoever.

[miiriya]

[bryannagraham]

I’m logging off

[thehumblelee]

Bih lol

[memesonthehour]

Hi I’m a bot, I post a meme every hour, every day. Follow me.