[aro-rambles]

Tumblr is really interesting because you can say something like thursday is duck with a top hat day, and half the website will reblog it

[maladi0401]

Duck in a Top Hat Thursday, y’all!

[evastratt]

I am a friend to all cats. Yes even the mean ones. They have their reasons.

[reading-writing-revolution]

[why-yes-i-am-an-adult]

This monument in Kazakhstan makes me so emotional.

5 people linked hands to save the dog, but there are only 4 in the statue...

so you can be the fifth

[slightly-gay-pogohammer]

hey gang i got popsicles pick one as pass the box to someone else

mint

lemon

orange

strawberry

cola

pineapple

dark cherry

anise

Remaining time: 2 days 15 hours

"i cant believe you dont have this or that flavor" listen they had these ones okay

[whosname]

[id. A twitter post by @/Bennieeexyz Jury duty letter came addressed to my cat. Not a mistake. "Felix Martinez" - that's his full name according to his vet records. My last name. His first name. Somehow he's a registered voter now. Called the county clerk. Me: My cat got summoned for jury duty. Clerk: Is the name correct on the summons? Me: Yes, but he's a cat. Clerk: Is Felix Martinez a legal resident of this county? Me: He's a legal cat. Clerk: Sir, if the name matches our records, he needs to appear or file an exemption. Me: He can't file anything. He has paws. Clerk: You can file on his behalf. Me: Under what exemption? There's no box for "is a cat." Clerk: (pause) Check "unable to serve due to medical reasons." Me: What's the medical reason? Clerk: He's a cat. Me: That's not a medical condition. Clerk: It is if it prevents him from serving. Sent in the form. Got rejected two weeks later. "Insufficient documentation. Please provide medical professional's statement." Took the letter to my vet. Me: I need you to write that my cat can't do jury duty. Vet: Why is your cat summoned for jury duty? Me: Excellent question. No good answer. Vet: This is the weirdest request I've gotten. Me: Can you just write that he's medically unfit to serve? Vet: On what grounds? Me: He's a cat. Vet: (started typing) "Patient is unable to serve due to species-related limitations including inability to speak, read, or comprehend legal proceedings." Me: Perfect. Sent it in. Got another rejection. "Summons is mandatory. Failure to appear will result in contempt of court." My roommate thought this was hilarious. Roommate: Felix is going to jail. Me: This is serious. Roommate: Bring him to court. See what happens. Decided that was actually the only option left. Day of jury duty, put Felix in his carrier. Brought the entire paper trail of rejection letters. Checked in at the courthouse. Clerk: Name? Me: Felix Martinez. Clerk: (looked at the cat carrier) Is that Felix? Me: Yes. Clerk: (long stare) He's a cat. Me: I've been saying that for six weeks. Clerk: Why didn't you file an exemption? Me: I filed three. All rejected. Showed her the letters. She read through them, expression shifting from confusion to disbelief. Clerk: Someone rejected the veterinary documentation? Me: Twice. Clerk: (called her supervisor over) You need to see this. Supervisor read everything. Looked at Felix. Looked at me. Supervisor: How did a cat get registered to vote? Me: You tell me. Supervisor: This is a data error. Me: Took you six weeks to figure that out. They dismissed Felix immediately. Apologized for the inconvenience. Supervisor: We'll remove him from the voter registry. Me: Appreciate it. Supervisor: (pause) Out of curiosity, how would he have voted? Me: Probably whatever party supports universal treats. Got a formal apology letter a week later and a voter registration card. For me this time. Apparently I wasn't registered, but my cat was. Roommate: Felix committed voter fraud. Me: Felix committed nothing. He's innocent. Roommate: That's what they all say. Felix is sleeping on the jury summons now. Fitting end to his legal career. end id]

[ooppo]

A PORN BOT UNFOLLOWED ME?

[ooppo]

not that i care

[ooppo]

[cherryhatter-deactivated2015072]

KICK THE CAN!

Let’s play the biggest game of kick the can on the internet.

To kick the can, reblog it. I wanna see how long this can go on for.

[visibun]

the oldest reblogs for this post that i can find are from january 2nd of 2013. this can has been getting kicked around tumblr for almost 13½ years now

[drtanner]

And yet somehow this is my first time kicking it!

[thememedaddy]

[endlace]

You if bugs didn't exist

[m0nk3y-bl0g]

[pnglove]

[ilovetodrinkwater]

Simon and gar phone call

[teathattast]

[leonkennedysprostate]

"don't assign human morality to non human things" is so true except when it comes to printers. they know what they are, they understand dilemmas and ethics and morality. they choose to be how they are, they choose to be evil, at their very core they are rotten

[stitchthisfiona]

Today in niche genres of joke that I can never get enough of and will probably still be secretly thinking about four years later

[cleolinda]

[cleolinda]

[lotus0kid]

[lotus0kid]

[pomme-poire-peche]

[lotus0kid]

[sashaforthewin]

[peachfromcmbyn]

The thing about Miss Piggy is that she kind of has a Roger Rabbit comedy superpower where she wins nearly any conceivable fight she's in. But unlike other characters of which that's true, like say, Bugs Bunny, who tend to win because they make the opponent play the game with their rules, Miss Piggy wins because the joke is that she can beat the shit out of literally anybody.

[peachfromcmbyn]

Bugs Bunny beats Thanos by setting up an airport and making him take off the Infinity Gauntlet to go through the metal detector.

Miss Piggy beats Thanos by karate chopping him in the face and sending him flying.

[mildmayfoxe]

i hate when you wake up early by accident and then don’t go back to sleep right away & your body is like “oh we’re up? time to get up?” and then you get hungry. like bro no way dude turn that back off. i’m not up yet

[followmenot]

[morningsaidthemoon]

Tag! You're It! - My 2nd year film :D

[powerfulwizard]

Joe Russo when Tony Stark said “billionaire, playboy, philanthropist” in the first avengers

[powerfulwizard]

[karpad]

so far, I have quotes from the russos on how they think Cap is old fashioned and needed to go, how black widow was damaged and needed to “complete herself” how tony “needs to go.” they clearly don’t care for thor or ant man, thinking them idiots. They don’t seem to respect Falcon or War machine (I wonder why) so who DO they like?

Why were they given control over a movie franchise where they hate all the characters?

[powerfulwizard]

Completely agree. Here are the quotes they’re referencing btw

[dark-angel-be-thirsty-af-deacti]

This really freaking annoys me. If you’re in charge of a movie franchise then it is your job to embrace every character, to help them grow and overcome their differences. But no, NO! These asshats kill off every single character that they hate and are acting like complete babies just because they don’t like them. If you don’t like them so much then fuck off! Go and work on something else! Just stop ruining the MCU!!!

[powerfulwizard]

They both literally just hated everyone. Here is another quote I haven’t heard a lot of people mention either

[powerfulwizard]

Loki: h-

Joe Russo:

[wet-raccoon]

this is so funny tho

[biofomission]

Oh they hated everyone that explains why the movies are like that

[rose---child]

No wonder the mcu feels like a slightly better Michael bay franchise

[kaladork]

On the bright side, knowing the directors actively hated half the characters they were working with leaves me feeling 0% hesitant to ignore every single bullshit character move they made! 😜

[ford-ye-fiji]

I don’t know why people do this… for example they did it with Star Trek and jj abrams…

[fairy-anon-godmother]

Look, I have my differences with the LOTR movies, but you can see in every frame the sheer overwhelming love for the story that went into those movies. On genuinely every level. Every person involved with the production of those movies loved what they were doing and were working passionately, and it shows. 

The disregard that leaks through parts of the MCU, two of the new Star Trek movies, and the new Star Wars trilogy really is baffling to me. So many people love these franchises and would have lovingly poured their heart and soul into them. And filmmakers who just didn’t care were handed these films?? Imagine what we could have gotten if actual fans had been allowed to make these movies. 

Oh wait, I don’t have to imagine. People who love these franchises and these characters put their tiny amounts of free time and overwhelming effort into producing fanfiction and fanart for these characters every day. I could go on AO3 right now and in half a dozen clicks get sweeping, beautiful, poetic treatises on the human condition written through these ‘Verses. Vast arrays of adventures starring these characters, and the characters themselves would be lovingly adored by their writers. I could enjoy content made by people who care. 

These directors and producers don’t deserve to be handed these franchises and they don’t deserve the paychecks they receive for half-assing their way through them. Not when fans produce outstanding content every day for free, just out of passion alone. This is ridiculous, can Hollywood please start putting people who actually care about the characters in charge of the movies? Please? I promise I’ll go back to buying movie tickets if I think the characters will be treated fairly by their narratives. 

[sewickedthread]

That explains why, despite my incredible geekiness, I’ve been meh about seeing these movies. The contempt showed.

[lady-byleth]

I’m not even a fan of the mcu but I’m fucking livid right now