I Am Not Funny

27 and tired .

[darkaeldari]

If I had a time machine I'd go forward in time and dig up my own bones.

.....for what purpose

[yamibree]

they're mine

[darkaeldari]

ah I see. reclaiming the Self

[rylandsgrace]

I feel seen

[tiktaalic]

Arugula is some crap they found on the ground for real

[creepymutelilbugger]

thats because its plance. there are others as well

[fairycosmos]

it is what it is *throws up blood*

[executiveoutcomes-deactivated20]

gonna go start bar fights so I can get a cool facial scar 

[sheepdippedmax]

This one time we filled a glass forty bottle with gasoline and threw it in the bon fire. It exploded into my face and now I have three not so cool scars on my face

And two broken teeth

[executiveoutcomes-deactivated20]

what did you expect to happen 

[sheepdippedmax]

The Lord to protect me

[moshroom]

he had to jump in the ballpit to cool off after getting all airplane ears over a treat puzzle that proved a little too advanced

[moshroom]

he's done this a few times now. the ball pit actively soothes him when he gets mad over puzzles. i could learn something from this

[moshroom]

[dailycatsblog]

[toroimage]

[sourvape-deactivated20251109]

[moniquill]

Yes, I absolutely do accept Must the frog.

[bunnydracula]

tastefully concealing the identities of my students in this photo from last saturday’s live workshop event

[maykitz]

>see bird creeping up and down a tree trunk >look it up >common treecreeper

can't make this shit up

[hitboxesonstockimages]

this your man?

[majalha]

Remove the hitbox render from my son at once he will not be participating in your fighting game, you bastards

[hitboxesonstockimages]

Ma’am your son just hit me with a meaty divekick crossup

[aslongasitsblack]

genuinely imagine you are an in denial eighteen year old gay boy who’s like “okay i dont really care about girls whatever i just like playing hockey and i want to play hockey well :)” and then this mother fucker walks into your life

[pawbeanies]

what are you gonna doooo. gonna KISS me about it? huh? huh?

[yuriwinged]

maybe your cat is meowing bc it wants a cigarette

[guccilongboard]

Boq being unrecognizable while Fiyero is completely recognizable is so funny to me, because I know Boq spent the entire journey staring at Fiyero mad as hell

[schmergo]

The Lincoln Assassination is really just wild if you think about it for a moment. The younger brother of one of the most famous actors in the country- himself a famous actor and heartthrob in his own right- killed the President in a theatre and yelled “Sic semper tyrannis,” a line often associated with Brutus, a character that his brother had famously played.

Like, imagine if Liam Hemsworth killed the Prime Minister of Australia at a red carpet movie premiere or something and yelled “I went for the head,” and Chris had to leave the Avengers press tour to tell everyone, “I swear I had nothing to do with this.” Imagine how weird that would be.

[phdna]

…a whole history major and yet this post is the first time I’ve fully appreciated the weirdness of the Lincoln assassination

[doglike]

[stage-props]

I will never be able to live up to this Letterboxd review