Tony Fucking Stark Y’all

Nighthawk's Marvel sideblog. Expect lots of Stark Fam with a smattering of others

[brainbubblegum]

Sony made both movies so they obviously exist in the same universe

[brawltogethernow]

I understand the appeal of wanting every adult hero to instinctively adopt teenage Peter Parker, but can it really beat the hilarity of acknowledging that at 15 Peter was 5'10", unusually buff, went by a moniker with Man in it, wore a creepy full face mask, and had a tightly guarded secret identity and probably a Queens accent thick enough to have come out of a jello mold, and adult heroes reasonably responded to him by going, “Wow, this grown man is an immature asshole for no reason.”

[an-android-in-a-tutu]

Way funnier to me than adult heroes finding out Peter is a teenager and becoming Concerned is the idea of adult heroes Retroactively finding out Peter Was a teenager because he admits to being like. 22 and they’re like “Hang on you’ve been doing this for like. Seven years.” and he’s like “Haha crazy right? Anyway it’s too late for you to yell at me about that because the statue of limitations on that lecture ran out when I turned 18”

[brawltogethernow]

YEAH this trope is instantly more tolerable if it’s fully adult Peter being like, *listen up whippersnappers because I’ve been around the block voice* “I’m thirty, and—” and Tony Stark, who vaguely assumed Spider-Man is maybe two years older than him because he just has that energy and hasn’t reassessed this for four presidential terms, is like, *drunkenly doing math* “You’re how many”

[mamapluto]

Okay but…them trying to talk about Old People Stuff with him, not realizing that he wasn’t alive to remember xyz thing happening, never used xyz technology bc he didn’t exist yet, not expecting him to agree with the fact that some ppl were saying songs they grew up to were oldies, etc

[brawltogethernow]

The thing about Peter Parker is that he was raised by senior citizens the way other heroes are raised by wolves. He has the body of an Olympic gymnast and the soul of a malcontented geriatric. This likely contributed to the perpetuation of the accidental ruse.

[brawltogethernow]

It’s when he channels Aunt May so hard he makes it sound like he was personally and immediately affected by McCarthyism that the time traveler fringe theory starts really picking up bets.

[brawltogethernow]

Pal, I JUST SAID he was raised by AUNT MAY.

Also not to get real on a ha ha comic post but the elderly are not your enemy. There are old progressives.

[rubythecrimsonwriter]

Peter has a lot of feelings about the woman that discovered DNA and he strikes me as the kind of person that thinks that distancing yourself from notable figures of history by using their last names is stupid, so he’s going to say something like, “Rosalind worked so fucking hard to have that work snatched from her,” immediately followed by, “I woulda thumped him good,” and inspiring Tony and Banner to frantically look through the 1930s and 40s yearbooks at King’s College and theorize which one was Spider-Man. Captain America tries reminiscing about the good ole days with him. Peter, for his part, has been absently agreeing and making vague “I’m listening” noises about the Rolling Stones and Elton John for the majority of his life, so adding baseball, Duke Ellington, and Ella Fitzgerald to the list wasn’t that much of a stretch.

[brawltogethernow]

There are only like three genuinely funny additions on this, but this is one of them.

[fandomsandstuff]

captain america pushing a get out the vote campaign: ‘spiderman did you vote’

spider’man’ at 16: uhhhh so about that 

[brawltogethernow]

“I…can’t.” “I see. That’s why it’s so important to restore voting rights to felons.”

[whetstonefires]

That’s made funnier by the fact that I feel like Steve’s natural assumption would be that Spiderman’s a non-citizen, so him jumping straight to felon is like, Peter just has such strong criminal vibes.

[wishfulcynic]

Steve: What’d you go in for?

Peter, panicking: Jaywalking!

Steve: This prison pipeline needs to stop.

[triviallytrue]

sometimes i stop and think about what an incredibly dumb villain thanos was. idk how you were supposed to take him seriously when his goal was that dumb

[sigmaleph]

made it all the more galling to see people saying thanos “had a point”

[theaudientvoid]

In the comics, his goal was to fuck a skeleton.

[fipindustries]

see? considerably less dumb

[ilya-rozanova]

IRON MAN (2008)

[kinstein-art]

lmao have fun in the multiverse of madness doc

[funkylittlebidiot]

Tony Stark is definitely the kind of person who’d say “she got that from her mother” whenever Morgan gets complimented on her intelligence despite being the classified genius

[seibelsays]

This is EXACTLY why Bucky Barnes is my favorite character and it brings me so much joy to finally see a little bit of it on screen.

[phdna]

I feel like an extremely minor 616!Bucky moment that really sums up who Bucky is as a character is when he and Natasha are strolling in the rain and he begins to whine about it and she’s like “…seriously? That’s too much for you? You fought Nazis.” and he just straight up says “If I have to compare everything to fighting Nazis, I’ll never get to complain about anything.” and I remember stopping and smiling because that’s it. Bucky hits every trope of the grimdark hero but instead of becoming the grimdark hero he just… complains a lot about inconsequential things in ways that hurt no one. He remains sweet and genuinely upbeat as a rule, he’s just… gonna make sure the world knows when he’s Mildly Inconvenienced. He’s 100% on board with helping you move on a weekend! He’s just gonna complain about random stuff while he does it and he won’t expect you to understand half of what he’s even talking about, he just has a complaining quota to meet, like a psychological fitbit that measures harmless irritation

[616s]

🥺🥺🥺

[athenadcvell]

“My child is completely fine” Your child is still crying over the death of a fictional billionaire superhero from 2 years ago

[maplefiasco]

10 Times TikToker @bdylanhollis exuded Chaotic Pre-Serum Steve Rogers energy.

[ruffboi-mags]

My wife @taibhsearachd​ sent me this link and immediately upon seeing it was a gifset of Dylan i said “OMG this guy just radiates modern tiny!Steve energy, I love him so fuckin much, it’s insane”

And then I scrolled down and saw the goddamn caption XD

[shock]

sorry i’m late the radio started playing that song i’m operantly conditioned to kill people to and it was just this whole thing 

[heli0s-writes]

[ynngaa]

Previously on WandaVision

[sakura-haruka]

[feelingsinclouds]

You could drop Tony Stark naked in the middle of the desert and he’d fly out in a jet made of sand and cactus needles. It’s not his stuff that gives him power. It’s his brain.

[hello-shellhead]

Tony admiring his work on the tower! :)

[incorrect-assvengers]

Pepper: What are you doing?

Tony, taking a buzzfeed quiz to see what kind of poptart he is: Billionaire stuff.

[steveandbvcky]