I think the thing transandro bros fundamentally do not understand is that, our worst case scenario as trans men is being seen as ugly weird women. And yeah that sucks. But trans women’s worst case scenario isn’t being seen as men. They are never viewed or treated as cis men are. Their worst case scenario is that they are completely unpersoned.
Reversing that, a trans man’s best case scenario is being perceived and treated as a cis man. Which is to say, receiving an immense amount of privilege. A trans woman’s best case scenario is being treated as a cis woman, and facing the brunt of all the misogyny implied there within.
Of trans men and trans women, only one group ever gets the privilege of being seen as men and navigating through the world that way. Not all trans men get that. But trans men never get unpersoned the way trans women do on the basis of gender.
In the narratives of transphobes, trans men are never the perpetrators, never the problem. We are always victims of “the trans cult,” autistic women lead astray. Think of Irreversible Damage, of their obsession with our reproductive organs. This narrative is awful. It is dangerous. But it is just flat out not what trans women get stuck with.
Trans women are stuck being called groomers and rapists and too strong for sports while simultaneously, because transphobes are fascists, framed as pathetic effete weak unpersons that they want to enact physical, sexual, and structural violence against under the belief that they cannot fight back. Because fascists paint their enemies as unfathomably strong and pathetically weak at the same time.