[jun-hug]

Foxes in Snow

my carrd ★

[cookiethebirddoll]

bus is my friend. shes no train but shes trying her hardest in a world that hates her

[draculagerard]

woke deadbeat father: i'm just going to get some oat milk

[tiktaalic]

I was born in the exact right generation I love being an unmarried woman in my twenties with my own bank account and no children

[tiktaalic]

This getting reblogged with “and my thirties” “and my forties” “and my fifties”

[misscrazyfangirl321]

Being an adult will have you unironically craving a vegetable

[misscrazyfangirl321]

Being an adult will have you unironically sad about a parasite outbreak in fresh vegetables.

[wulfhalls]

explaining football to americans: imagine jason sudeikis was there

[loveridden1999]

fuck it i will figure it out somehow

[campsis]

Eden Kalif, Good Cats

[yorgen-sh]

[asteroidtroglodyte]

This is poetry. This is storytelling. You can leave the sound off if you want but. Stop. Watch. You surely will not regret doing so.

[captainjonnitkessler]

Babysitting a toddler is a lot like being the narration in a point-and-click adventure game. Watching him knock on the doors of empty rooms and saying "hmm. I don't think anyone's in there". Watching him attempt to use [spoon] on [cat] and saying "I don't think those things go together". Watching him throw a cup of water onto the floor and just commenting "the floor is wet now" when he looks up at me to see if I approve.

[racial]

[greelin]

sorry for not answering messages for three thousand years i have. Stew. in place of a brain. you know how it is

[json-derulo]

when we started talking about getting a small-breed dog I was like, "I will NEVER turn into one of those people who treats their little dog like a doll or an accessory by forcing them to dress up in ridiculous outfits. Dogs HATE that. They should get to be DOGS, and that means not having to wear anything but a HARNESS and being FREE to ROLL in the MUD." and then I adopted a dog who throws a fit if you try to take him for a walk without letting him pick out a bow tie first. a dog who loves wearing pajamas so much that I'm about to spend a disgusting amount of money on several sets of linen ones for summer. a dog who watches me wave at him to follow me through a mud puddle and just stands there blinking up at me like, "are you fucking serious? and get my paws wet?"

[json-derulo]

me: I will raise him no differently than the two 80-lb labs I had growing up. absolutely no hoity-toity frou frou little yapyap dog stuff. he's gonna be a good ol' fashioned, rough-and-tumble, capital D-O-G—

—never mind. the boy yearns to be ensweatered

[json-derulo]

to celebrate the popularity of this post, I ordered him another set of the linen jammies in yellow. now he looks like paddington bear

the etsy seller threw in a little miniature hermes silk scarf as a freebie and I dare you to tell me he doesn't know how handsome he looks in it. whenever we take it off of him he broods like he's a wealthy victorian orphan child in desperate need of a seaside holiday to restore his delicate aristocratic constitution

[queerofthedagger]

the fun thing about having a mental health crashout in your thirties is that sure yeah you're crashing out, but at the same time there's a part of you standing across the room smoking ben affleck style, going yeah yeah you're crashing out. you crashed out before you will crash out again can we wrap this up yet. and the most annoying part about it is that they're right, and that that does Not stop you from crashing out even a little. love and light on planet earth.

[sacred-portal]

[demadogs]

nothing can break the bond between a friend who loves spoilers and a friend who just watched an amazing show and needs to tell someone the entire plot from start to finish

[demadogs]

alternatively: nothing can break the bond between a friend who doesnt read and a friend who just read an amazing book and needs to tell someone the entire plot from start to finish

[demadogs]

nothing can break the bond between a friend who cannot and will not watch horror but is still interested and a friend who just watched an amazing horror movie and needs to tell someone the entire plot from start to finish

[wiisagi-maiingan]

If you embroider or hand sew in your bed, you may think to yourself, "I'm just gonna set my needle down real quick next to me/on my chest/literally anywhere except inside the project or on a needle catcher and I'll get it in a minute, it'll be fine." But it won't be fine. You'll lose the needle and then you'll have a loose needle just in your bed. Haunting you. Waiting for you. Craving your flesh and blood.

Use your needle catcher.

[wiisagi-maiingan]

You'll never guess what's loose in my bed right now.