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@addyni
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āWhy not just try the thing youāre most afraid ofā
Do your best
Dream is chased. I believe in that. I am not someone who was born with full of privileged. Well, my childhood and school days were okay. But, as I grow older, I realized that life is not easy. It's damn hard and it damn needs struggle. Ā I don't mind struggle, as long as I can achieve what I want. And trust me I just want simple things in life. Good money to save, so that I can provide the best to my family and things that have my interest. But sometimes you think you have tried hard, but you keep failing and you're stuck. What's there to motivate you? I am huge believer of Allah. Over in Quran, He said that after bad times, there will be good times, and so on. It wil keep happening until our death. So, let's just try again and do our best, or maybe better.
That thing about "glorified" success
Say, what success is? What is that thing that people is chasing for hardly? Is it a good score in school? Is it having a good job, making a lot of money? Whether employed or being entrepreuner? Is it a personal fulfillment? Following your one passion, such as to travel around the world? I think, as long as we live, it is true that we have to keep chasing those things above. But, I think society is too focused in one type of success that often put pressure to oneself. Another say in putting pressure is maybe, we are too busy in comparing ourselves to other people that we forget we may have achieved our "own" success too. Thus, I agree with the quote that says "the important thing today is just do better than yesterday". Success should not be about getting score 10 or A in every subject. It's a good thing, of course, but it should be gradually improve score. Maybe this quiz you'll get 5, then success means that the next quiz you get 6. 6? Not 10? So what about it? Why you should focus on one type of academic success, getting full score? Success should not be about "that genius who makes an app at young age, sell it for million dollars", or "that genius who able to hack or solve hacking problem", or "she/he who started business from college days", or "she or he working in such big company". They are amazing, of course, also inspiring, good role model for the youth. But, what's wrong with just able to type a simple word document and ppt document instead of making that one great app? Maybe, some people takes months also to learn that. What's wrong with just understand and able to solve one lecturer's asignment instead of juggling with many entrepreneural adventures. Maybe, some people also sacrifice sleeps for that. What's wrong with just working for small company, at least you have your own money to pay bills. The media often glorifies achievement of "big" wonderful people, that we often feel small of our own "big" achievement. Success should not be about "that adventurer who travels around the world", or "that passionate people who love making videos on youtube", or "that religious person who is, well, able to do a lot of kind of ibadah". They are wonderful, of course, also very brave. But, what's wrong with just visiting your grandparents's house. Maybe some people just have the money and time, enough to visit their relatives. Ā Also, what's wrong with just want to have a stable day-to-day job, which maybe we don't have that many passion in it. Some people just need to feed for their family. And, because I am moslem, what's wrong with just able to do 5 times pray in a day and fasting in Ramadhan, instead of going umroh so many times. A lot of us have known deep down we want to do it also. We do not have to feel small for all the things that we are doing now. So what? Maybe your score, your school, you working condition, your financial condition seem not that great according to the society. Do not feel small, do not feel like you have not achieved anything. Celebrate any small achievement you made today, and just do better tomorrow. The sun will rise again and you'll somehow will get to your own success land.
The thing with nothing "important"/"urgent" to do in one day
We all have that time, when it feels like nothing to do or do not want to do anything. They day is so boring, but it's still so ridiculous and impossible to stay at the bed all day. So, as a last semester student, usually who only has thesis to be finished, we have so many nothing-to-do time. But still, you want to be productive, so what should we do, instead of just seamlessly and waste money by hanging out with friends outside (it doesn't mean it's bad, but we'll talk about it later)? I have some advice for that. This is what I developed by myself, after looking at this graph below.
So, the point with the graph above is you need to keep learning, anything. Also, another thing is to keep being in "social". Therefore, here are my list of activities that I like to do in my nothing to do time: 1. Learning a. Listening to Podcast Two channels I like to listen in SoundCloud: there are Lavendaire with her playlist on lifestyle advice and TalkToMeInKorean with their tracks on, obviously, learning Korean language. One thing about Lavendaire, it is such a wonderful channel. She has a youtube channel also, it is also wonderful if you want to check out. So, in the lifestyle advice she will talk topics that really encouraging and lighten you, just overall untangled your mind. Ā b. Academic learn Well, I do like to play this app called SoloLearn, it's an app giving you some brief and quizzes you on something IT related. It's because I'm a computer graduate, that's I love something with IT. I also enrolled my self in Udacity online classes, to refresh my memory and learning something new in IT world. c. Read Just read anything. Any newest news or read book. Well, for me, beside reading some newest news to catch up with what's going on with the world, I also read news that matter to me, such as techinasia.com (IT related). Then, I also read books. I read ton of books. When I finished one, I'll just read another. I am kinda addicted to book. What I'm reading now is The Geography of Genius by Eric Weiner. 2. Pampering yourself Women, we like to be pampered. So, why don't you do it by yourself at home. It saves money also. I'd like to do body scrubbing, and just basically taking care my skin from head to toe, while listening to the Podcast. Ah, it feels so good. And somehow, I feel I have accomplished something afterward. Haha. 3. Clean your room, dishes, and etc. Okay, so after you clean yourself, you cannot keep staying in such a dirty environment, right? Go clean your room, wash the dishes, put away your laundry. Still, do those things while listening to the podcast. Trust me you will be refreshed afterward. 4. Take care of your mental health also a. Journaling Just write anything you want, any length you want, draw anything you want. It will make you realize what you truly feel, what you truly think. For me, it triggers my motivation, my positivism, and my creativity. b. Praying Well, I would say I am such a religious person, so I prefer praying rather than meditating. But, mediation is also good, you can make yourself calmer and be more mindful to your surrounding. Meanwhile, praying is the way to connect with God. So, because I believe in God, and connect with Him is what's making me calmer, I like to pray. There are many ways of praying to Allah, the Islamic God. I would say I'll do Dhuha, it's a daylight/morning pray, or Hajat Pray, it's a special pray when you really really wanna ask something. Reading Quran is also wonderful, while on it you can also do memorization. Another thing is you can just read any supplication(du'a) and dzikr (compliments to Allah) anytime you want and any much you want. In Islam, making yourself closer to God by doing all those prays will make you be granted Ā rewards by Allah to be used later so that we can go to heaven. So, beside calming my mind, praying will give me benefits. I love it. 5. Exercise I admit I don't really like to exercise. But I realize somehow, I still need to move. So I do a short stretching from time to time. And okay, if I think I really really need to move, I'll go hangout with my friends to a mall, or just go do small grocery shopping in nearest shop. 6. Free yourself but don't be too much Be social, whether it's on internet, such as intagram, snapchat, facebook, watch youtube videos, drama series, log onto your favorite community page, or real one, meeting your friends. But still, don't be too much, pay attention to your eyes and mobile data, and time spent. Nothing too much will end up good. For me, being so much free will make me regret in the end of the day. I don't know, I just feel that I am way more too able to spend my time in much more productive way, so yeah, that's me. So, what are you doing in your nothing-to-do time?
That Thing About Money Stress
I think people get broke nowadays due to what they want not what they need. Social media may be the biggest culprit. It brings new lifestyle in people's everyday life. They need to buy that latest fashion piece to post an ootd look. Ah, maybe they could get sponsored if they get more serious in it. They need to eat at that hippiest eatery to post a food picture and show the world they've been there too. They need to visit that newest vacation object to pose at a certain photo-spot and post it. There are more aspects caused by social media's trend, but basically those three are what people closely follow.
Is it a bad thing? My opinion is NOT REALLY!
This way, economy runs. Indonesian are confident with their spending power, thus creating growth. As long as the government takes a good precaution and not creating a huge inflation again as few years back.
However, back to the first sentence. People do get broke, especially students, like me. Well, I don't base my act upon social media trends. But, I still need to follow some. First thing first, I still need to buy internet data every month. I use internet to hail uber or use any gojek services. Those services are not free. I also need to follow closely my email inbox for job openings on LinkedIn. I watched YouTube also. This thing needs the biggest chunk out of my internet data. I watched them for relaxation from my academic stress.
Well, I think I need to buy a good fashion piece too sometimes, because it's a good thing to look good in public space (then let's add makeup and skincare also). I want to visit the hippiest eatery too, because the foods seem delicious. In the end of the day, vacation won't do me any bad.
So yeah, ah, I think I am broke. Or maybe poor?
I need to save, be creative, and work my ass off!!!
During times of deep trial, despair, and sadness, Muslims seek comfort and guidance in the words of Allah in the Qur'an. Allah reminds us that all people will be tried and tested in life, and calls upon Muslims to bear these trials with āpatient perseverance and prayer.ā Indeed, Allah reminds us that many people before us have suffered and had their faith tested; so too will we be tried and tested in this life. And it is those who show patience that will be successful..
- www.lionofAllah.com
Keraguan
Di Indonesia, Semarang tidak (belum?) bisa dikatakan metropolitan, kota besar dengan segala sub-kultur di dalamnya. Saya lahir dan besar di kota tersebut, dari orang tua yang tidak pernah tinggal di kota metropolitan pula. Mereka berasal dari Solo, kota yang masih sangat kental kultur Jawa halusnya. Terakhir, saya berasal dari keluarga pekerja kelas menengah. Singkat kata, saya berasal dari keluarga Jawa yang sangat biasa saja.
Saya waktu itu masih 16 tahun, pergi merantau untuk kuliah di kota metropolitan (pertama untuk saya), Surabaya. Usia yang muda dan berasal dari terbiasa berada kultur yang lebih āsoftā dari Jawa Timur, membuat saya lebih ātimidā. Saya tidak merasa mendapat banyak hal, selain tentunya pendidikan (ITS is still one damn good campus to go for academic purpose).
Untuk itulah, saya sekolah lagi. MM UGM membuat saya melakukan banyak hal dan membuat saya akhirnya menjadi pribadi yang lebih berani. Berani bermimpi, berani untuk mencapai lebih banyak lagi.
Tapi, ada berbagai keraguan terus terpikir oleh saya seiring dengan tumbuhnya banyak mimpi tersebut.
Saya berasal dari keluarga dan komunitas yang termasuk ketat dalam beragama, yakni Islam. Saya pun mengakui saya cukup ketat dalam mengamalkan agama saya. Selain sholat wajib 5 kali sehari, saya ada kewajiban untuk menghadiri pengajian terjadwal setidaknya 3x dalam satu minggu, dan hal-hal sunah lainnya yang memang sudah saya rutinkan sedari dulu. Ketatnya saya dalam mengamalkan dalam beragama ini bukan karena saya hanya mengikuti perintah orang tua saya, tapi memang saya yang ingin. Saya takut dengan Tuhan saya.
But then, seperti yang saya sampaikan sebelumnya, saya mempunyai banyak ambisi. Dan selama saya kuliah master, saya menyadari betapa western-mindednya saya. Saya orang yang sangat terbuka mengungkapkan pikiran saya, saya suka mengetahui banyak pemikiran-pemikiran yang berbeda dari saya, dan saya eager mempelajari atau menantang diri saya melakukan banyak hal baru. Thus, ambisi saya sekarang adalah bekerja di perusahaan multinational, because I think I have the capability.
So, keraguan pertama adalah, apakah prinsip beragama saya bisa berjalan beriringan dengan ambisi saya?
Saya akui selama saya berada dalam international environment, banyak sekali hambatan dalam at least sholat wajib secara tepat waktu dan menghadiri pengajian tepat waktu dan dengan khusuk. Bersosialisasi? Itās quite hard when itās so uncomfortable for me to stay out late, go inside bars, and of course not drinking any alcohol. One more thing, itās also uncomfortable for me to have a physical contact with men.
Well, saya pikir saya masih bisa make it works somehow. Ya karena toh saya sudah pernah menjalaninya. Masuk kelas internasional, bergaul dengan banyak mahasiswa asing, lancar. Membuat acara-acara yang melibatkan mereka, lancar. Exchange ke Korea, oke. Internship di Bangkok, oke.
Walau memang, saat sholat dan menghadiri pengajian tidak tepat waktu, rasa bersalah dan keraguan itu akan selalu muncul kembali. But, I just need to be braver to speak up my needs, right?
Lalu, keraguan berikutnya.
See, I am such an anomaly. Saya Jawa, ekonomi menengah, ketat dalam agama, tapi saya juga S2, dan memiliki banyak ambisi, working in international environment. Who is going to marry me?
Kalau meminjam istilahnya instragrammer @eslimah
I mean - to begin with - who could ever be as much of a freako as me? But more importantly, who would have the same views? Who would become your backbone and who would help you on your journey to heaven? Ā Ā Ā
Dalam circle saya, masyarakat ekonomi menengah dengan banyak berkecimpung dalam dunia agama, tidak ada (oke maybe jarang karena saya harus membuka berbagai kesempatan bukan) yang menilai saya sebagai calon istri idaman.
Banyak teman-teman lelaki saya, dari segi agama, menginginkan istri diam di rumah mendidik anak dan melayani suami. Tidak banyak keluar rumah. Itās gonna be so uncomfortable for me.
Juga, tidak dipungkiri, banyak pula laki-laki dalam circle saya, secara akademis, Ā minder dengan pencapaian saya.
Thus, I think I need a much bigger circle. Circle yang menerima perempuan mencapai banyak hal, tapi I also need the men to be as strict as I am. But then, how? Let just the time reveals all Godās secret.
Ā In the end, saya masih akan tetap bersyukur atas apa pun yang Allah berikan pada saya. Dan apalah saya ini? Yang saya bisa hanya lakukan adalah berdoa. Ā
A believer should not despise a believing woman. If he finds something in her character he dislikes, he will be pleased by something else.
Source: Sahih Muslim 1469, Grade: Sahih
women, they should respect themselves more also
Rindu, Longing, źµėƼ 2016, Book no. 3 Trust me it's not me doing reading challenge. I just can't live without books. #indonesiamembaca #bacabuku #book #novel #fiction #tereliye #sastra #sastraindonesia #buku (at Perumahan Batan Indah Serpong Banten)
I Took One Semester Abroad at Ewha Womans University (1)
When you have the right mindset, study is a fun thing to do. The right mindset incudes a healthy mental condition, aka a happy heart and no pressure. So, I am happy with my condition and surrounding now. Studying my master degree in Master of Management Program in Universitas Gadjah Mada is great. The workload was crazy a lot, but I am happy. I am able to blend with my friends, so it feels great when I see we are fighting together tackling those assignments loads.
Because studying is fun and I want to get many many more of knowledges, I took an opportunity (also felt like a challenge) to study abroad. My campus has this option for you to study one semester abroad or do double degree at an affiliated university. I opted for one semester study abroad. I picked Seoul, South Korea as my destination and Ewha Womans University as my place to study.
The reason I picked South Korea as my country destination is because I see the raise of South Korean investments in Indonesia. Thus, studying the culture and the language of this country would give some advantages for me at the time I graduate and have to look for a job. Why I chose Ewha? Well, I was following my friendās choice. She gave her reason that Ewha School of Business, the department that we have to go to is AACSB accredited. Therefore, it is one of internationally acknowledged school. I saw no reason not to follow her.
I will write a series detailing my experiences studying there, as an Indonesian, as a girl, and as a muslim. But before it, I will write a prolog series. I will write two posts about the goods and the bads (not that bad, I promise you) about studying there.
I have a dilemma to write about the good ones first or the bad ones first. After some contemplating, I think it is better to save the best for the last.
The Journey of Accepting Vulnerabilities
I think most of us will agree that Asian are stereotyped with good education. The good education here equals with famous school, good scores, good track records of extracurricular activities, such as social works, arts, etc, etc. Even if your parents are not that competitive, eventually you'll end up following this kind of norm. Because it's just the way the culture is. I'm not the exception.
My parents are not that competitive type, but I know that having good scores in tests is a must if you want to have, well, you can say "good life". Don't think the grandeur one like working in a big company yet. just think about your life in school. The teacher will praise you, your parents will praise you, your big-family will love you, even your neighbor will like you. Everyone will say "what a filial kid you are."
A life where everybody praise and love you, how good is it.
Today people trust the causes and means and not Allah Azzawajal. There are two types of tawakkal, one is to trust the means and the other is to trust Allah Azzawajal. Those who trust means are weaker in Emaan. A muslim adopts the means but trusts Allah Azzawajal. www.lionofAllah.com
My Leadership Journey at MM UGM (Part 3)
I always like to do unique and experience different things, so right from the start of being the leader of this International Student Ambassador Club I thought about some activities that in my opinion would be interesting to be held.
I thought about doing activity A, B, or C. But then maybe I was still so green in being a leader that in the beginning it was kind of confusing to communicate my ideas, and organize them. And as I was talking in my previous post, communication is my biggest hurdle.
As the time goes on, I realized that organize the events with smaller team is much more efficient, better communication it was. I got a lot of wonderful advice also from my teammates, who I admitted they have better organizing skills due to their previous experiences.
Tackling academic responsibilities and making sure our incoming students have wonderful experiences was of course not an easy job, but I was so excited that I barely had any hard feeling. It was nice to talk to my teammates to ensure we hold smooth and interesting for our incoming students friends. And of course, it was wonderful all of us local students spending time together with our new friends. Establishing friendship was our main goal after all.
My Leadership Journey at MM UGM (Part 2)
Talking with people, being connected, I thought it would be easy before I went to Surabaya at the age of 16. Definitely this main way of socializing was indeed the hardest thing that I have to learn maybe forever.
I found it hard to be really connected with my mostly 2 years older college mates, so I turned to be preserved and ended up only mingling with my religious organization circle friends (my number one comfort zone). Though I also learned a lot of orginizing lessons from my religious organization, I felt kinda left behind by the rest of the world.My college mates ended up looking and being so professionally mature when they graduated, yet I still felt like a naive traditional country bumpkin.
Therefore, one thing I could exercise from being a leader of this International Ambassador Club at MM was becoming more communicative with everyone. I learned happily doing it. My new foreigner friends are really those who opened to new friendship with new cultures intact, thus I can try to talk and connect with them easier.
In the end of the day, learning to be more communicative and turn to be more compassionate is a never ending journey. But, being the leader of this club has given me a huge opportunity to break my comfort zone. And I felt so much gratitude to my friends. I will never ever regret it.
My Leadership Journey at MM UGM (Part 1)
I came to study at Master of Management in Universitas Gadjah Mada in a full resolution to develop myself professionally. I was starting my bachelor degree at 16 yo and thought finished it without capable to grab anything I need to face professional field.Ā
Thus, I challenge myself right in the beginning by registering at the international program in MM UGM. I thought that it would push myself to mingle with more foreign and professional surrounding. And yes it is!
After finishing a Pre-MBA semester, got into the first semester of my international class, the International Office of my campus was saying that there would be 27 incoming students, mostly form European countries. The International Office wanted to create a club that would help those incoming students adapt to their new surrounding. And I happily volunteered to be the first leader of this club. This was definitely the chance I was looking for all along to develop myself, mainly push my leadership skills.
I was not a total snob at being part of an organization. I was part of Islamic organization when I was pursuing my bachelor degree in Surabaya. Mostly, I was a secretary helping the coordinator and other committees organize events. So, I hope that I could leverage my older experiences to lead this new club at MM UGM called International Student Ambassador Club.