"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
NASA
One Nice Bug Per Day
RMH
KIROKAZE
$LAYYYTER
Keni
❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
Cosmic Funnies
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Mike Driver
Andulka
Today's Document
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izzy's playlists!
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
todays bird
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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Xuebing Du
seen from Germany
seen from Malaysia
seen from Brazil
seen from Germany
seen from China
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from Italy
seen from United States
seen from United States
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@algaegirl17
Air Himbo
Water Himbo
Earth Himbo
Fire Himbo
@crvggio I’ve been laughing at this for 47 years
And the Avatar
Reblogging again because that last addition is IMPORTANT
But when the world needed him most, he pulled the wrong lever...
Why do they even have that lever?
Well done everyone, 10/10 post
TikToker @bdylanhollis exuding Chaotic Pre-Serum Steve Rogers energy.
Happy "Well THAT Blew Up" to this post. In honor of 20k notes, please enjoy three additional gifs I made for this set, but had to cut to fit Tumblr's 10-images-per-post limit.
"Please stop growing!"
Everyone’s posting their favorite vines, so I thought I’d hop on this bandwagon.
this is absolutely the best compilation ive seen
You’re a mimic. You were disguised as a chair in a dungeon when an adventurer decided to take you as loot. You’ve actually enjoyed your life ever since as furniture in a jolly tavern. So when some ruffians try to rob the now-elderly adventurer’s business, you finally reveal yourself.
Okay, so- hey, hey! Stop with the screaming, you’re gonna wake people up! Shut up! If I wanted you dead, you’d be dead. Listen for a minute, already.
I was just minding my own-
I am so serious right now. If you wake Bob up, you won’t like what I do. He’s not young, these days, he needs his rest.
Okay? Okay.
Anyway. I was minding my own business. I was a fairly young mimic, I’d just really sort of settled into my first good morph. When you’re really young, freshly spawned, you sort of rotate through things, and you don’t quite get it right, most of the time.
It’s like learning how to walk for people, I think. You’re small, you don’t quite know what you’re doing… it’s a whole thing.
And I went chair. Now, that’s very exciting. Chairs aren’t a common mimic morph. For whatever reason- the gods? who knows?- most mimics end up containers. Trunks, chests, drawers, wardrobes, I had a cousin who was a barrel.
Chair, though, that’s good, though. No barbarian is gonna poke through your insides looking for loose change if you’re a good sturdy wooden chair. You might get sat on, but, heck, we’re pretty sturdy as a species. No big deal. And, honestly, easier to get some food.
Wha- no, we don’t eat people. We don’t eat flesh, that’s gross. We absorb magic. It’s why we tend to spawn in dungeons, lots of magic there. Though I pity the poor mimic clans that end up in a necromancer dungeon. Ugh.
Most adventurers have magic items on them, you absorb a little energy and get sat on for a bit, no big deal, easy meal. And you get a little variety in your diet, win for everybody.
Sure, we kill people from time to time. But let me ask you this: If you were just at home, minding your own business, and some big guy with no neck bristling with swords came along, bust into your house, walked into your room, and reached into one of your orifices to find valuables, you might take averse to that, don’t you think? It’s not like people don’t know about mimics. Take a little care, you know?
Anyway, I was still pretty young. I’d just settled into my morph. And this guy comes along and, you guessed it, no neck, bristling with swords. And he claps eyes on me and just stops, and stares, and I was like- kinda panicking, right? I’m thinking I messed up the morph, and he’s clocked me and now I’m gonna have to fight this guy.
And then he nudges his buddy and says ‘Hey, hey Jim, ain’t that the most beautiful chair you’ve ever seen in your life?’
And Jim’s like ‘yeah it’s a nice chair so what?’ and Bob- that’s the guy with no neck- he says ‘no, look at it! it’s gorgeous!’
I tell you, if I coulda blushed, I’d have been cherry red from top to bottom. When you first start to settle into a morph, you feel a little self-conscious, you know? You’re just starting to figure yourself out, and someone comes along and just says the nicest things. And he went on for a while. I was so flattered, best day of my life, aside from my first spawning.
Jim says ‘well just bring the damn thing! we have shit to do!’ so Bob does! Just picks me up and straps me to his back, and off we went.
And I went lots of interesting places, met some interesting people. I even ended up doing the watch at night a couple of times. Because Jim, sometimes he has this thing where he just falls asleep, he can’t help it, it’s not his fault. I had to help them out a couple of times. I was fond of the guy, you know? And most mimics don’t get to be part of adventuring parties, it’s just not done, so it was really neat to feel like I was a part of things.
Jim and Bob and their buddy Wade, they end up saving the kingdom, and they all go their separate ways. Bob went back to his home village- that’s here- bought a building, put me in the middle, and said ‘this is gonna be my tavern’. He hangs up his magical weapons around the bar- don’t bother with that, buddy, that glass is tougher than your ax, I promise.
Anyway, I’ve got plenty to eat. I even spawned a couple of times, helped fill out the place. I figure, save him a little money, I start my own clan, and there’s plenty of ambient magic to go around, the place is lively, better than some manky old dungeon any day, right?
Bob, he never quite figured it out. I think Jim was onto me, but Bob- he’s not bright. But he’s just the nicest guy, you know? He’s always got a kind word for someone. He’ll give you the shirt off his back. If you show up here hungry with no money, he feeds you, and often he’ll make sure you get some place to sleep and a job, if you’re looking. Everybody loves Bob.
And I really like people, that’s something I figured out about myself. I like the atmosphere here, too, there’s always new stories to hear. I’ve learned a lot, over the years, I’ll tell you what.
Now Bob, he’s not young anymore, and his kids well- they’re not the adventuring sort, as I think you have already sussed out. But they don’t need to fight, you know? That’s not the kinda life they need to lead.
So, bearing all that in mind, here’s the deal. You got two options. One- put everything down- nice and easy, mind- and leave, lock the door behind you, and this never happened. No harm, no foul.
Or… you can find out just how many times I’ve spawned.
Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed this one and want to help support me, here’s a link to my ko-fi! If like this story and you want to read more, here is my masterpost, currently updated with all of my tumblr ficlets.
If you screencap this for another website, please be courteous and link people to my tumblr.
reblagging for the day crowd
@bixbythemartian may i use your story for an actual D&D adventure?
yeah have fun with it
Those people who constantly reblog your stuff but you never really talk:
I do notice my regulars. You guys are the best.
“Regulars” makes me feel like a bar-tender…
Wiping down my dash at the end of an evening, I see your read-more, over-hear your rant in the tags, so I pour you a drink.
“…what’s troubling you, kid?”
It’s nine o’clock on a Saturday As the regular crowd tumbls by There’s an old fandom queen blogging next to me And her little gray tags catch my eye
She says tumblr I’m feeling like shit today can you send me some posts for a smile can we talk about slash, can you fill up my dash so I won’t have to think for a while
Laa dahdah didee dah La dahdah didee dah dadum
Fill up my dash, you’re my followers Fill it with pictures and fic Yeah we’re all in the mood for some memery And occasional pictures of dick
Now Jill is a centaur novelist And she writes of her girlfriend and wife She reblogs from Toni, who’s in My Little Pony, And probably will be for life.
As the staff implements wretched changes And we think of how aliens bone We are writing a lot about loneliess: It’s much better than writing alone.
AND sometimes we blog about politics
And sometimes we blog with a beer
And when I proudly boast that I’m older than most,
They say ‘gross, what are YOU doing here’.
*wild applause!!
When you learned your mother was a goddess, things finally seemed to fall into place. The other demigods laughed at you, the only child born to the goddess of the hearth, Hestia. But your power was so much more than they could dream of.
Being born to a goddess was something I never imagined to have happened to me, and really, least of all to a goddess of virginity, so really, Hestia as a mother? I didn’t believe that.
But dad told me he had been at the oven with papa and they had stoked the fire, they poured wine and sacrifices bread and oil and meats to the flame, and begged the goddess to let them have family together to gather in this home, a family to gather around a hearth and to love.
And listen to their prayers she did, sculpting me from embers and ash and blowing life into me with a spark from her flames, kissing my forehead once before she left, leaving me forever with her mark on my face.
That’s what dad told me, and now it all makes much more sense.
I never ran out of s'more stuff, ya know? Even if I had definitely just used up my last chocolate for a cake, there’d be a new perfectly preserved package of it in my cupboard. Marshmallows empty cause of my hot chocolate? No silly, there is still some left in the box somehow.
I also play the guitar, at the campfires I always played and lead the chorus, but never do my fingers turn to blisters, and I never need to rest my voice.
It also explains why I have always been at home anywhere and with anyone, I could sit down, and I was home where I was and the people with me would be my family.
Other demigods mocked me, I am the child of the goddess of the home, of the hearth, a cooking deity they’d call her.
It was…rude, but it was fine, I could deal with it. I didn’t have a cabin full of siblings, but whoever stopped by was family, right?
And it was totally fine to leave me behind when they went into battle, I am no good with weaponry, but I could still follow them, grab some food for them, they’d be hungry after all the fighting.
And they seemed almost concerned when I ran onto the battlefield barefooted and in my hoodie and sweatpants and apron, rushing towards a dragon and a son of Thanatos.
Their screams were scared when the useless child of a goddess ran onto the battlefield, and this boy actually tried to hold me back, even if his arms were shattered and his skin was scorched.
They were shocked when the battle ended with me.
They would’ve known I can’t get burned from all the times I’d stumbled into the campfire or spilled tea.
They should’ve known I can make anyone and anything calm down quickly enough.
They should’ve known I can protect anyone behind me by raising my hand.
A hearth does not burn, it warms and nutures. A family calms and cares, not aggravates. A home does not abandon, it protects.
I am the son of Hestia, and my mother gave me the ability to be a hearth anywhere I went. It is safe with me, for anyone.
I ended wars before, this one was no different.
Beautiful
@spiritspodcast
When you are a classical musician and the public asks you to play Queen …
@hieronymus-bush … although I’m not sure what you’ll think of it 😆
Holy hell. He has amazing technique AND he didn’t just transcribe the piece to piano, he essentially composed classical music (and honestly some neo-classical, lol) based on the melody. Plus, he kind of looks like Freddie.
People in the 1800s would’ve gone apeshit over this in the concert halls
Reblogging to watch later…
Ok I reblogged this before I watched it because it wouldn’t load, but now it is, and damn. Yeah. This is cool. As both a pianist and a queen fan, wow. Watching this man play is like watching a ballerina dominate a stage. Like watching as a mountain slowly creeps into existence as you reach the top of the foothill.
Can’t stop picturing Crowley watching this, wide-eyed, biggest grin on his face, scaring the absolute Hell out of everyone around him, because he is currently the happiest demon to ever exist (aside from Aziraphale and listening to Freddie himself, of course).
Too bad the prophet Cassandra never met Odysseus
They say if she made a prophecy Nobody would believe her
I’ve gotta say, that is exactly the kind of stupid thing that probably would circumvent a curse.
Cassandra: YOU ARE ALL GOING TO REGRET THIS SO MUCH YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW.
Odysseus: Regret it why?
Cassandra: You won’t believe me if I tell you. If I prophecy, nobody believes me. That is my curse.
Odysseus: … I’m Nobody. Fill me in.
*A couple of months later*
Odysseus: HELLO PENELOPE, I AM HERE PRECISELY ON TIME AND NOT YEARS LATE incidentally I rescued and adopted a Trojan seer while I was away, she’s great, got me home really fast, Cassandra this is your new mother who’s not going to treat you like shit.
Penelope: … I’m going to need more details, but okay, sure.
Cassandra: *in tears* I love you, new family.
Cassandra: Penelope, I’ve had another vision.
Penelope, sighs: Go tell your father.
#awww #wholesome greek mythology #bet you’ve never seen that phrase before (via @philosopherking1887)
@therkalexander it’s not Hades & Persephone, but I bet you’d enjoy this
10/10, no notes!!
@spiritspodcast
I swear I saw a tumblr post on here that said ‘horses have over 4,000 bones’ and i don’t know where it came from because its totally wrong, they have 205, but what kind of fucked up horse has this person seen out there because I’m absolutely terrified of it
extremely thankful this creature exists slightly to the left of our known reality
it sounds like a bowl of cereal when it walks
just because it has 4000 bones doesn’t mean they all must belong to it. you see where I’m going?
OH NO…
BONE THEIF!!!
I have to reblog the bone horse. I love the bone horse. It haunts my dreams.
@spiritspodcast
Demon Quiche
stop everything, this is bitty doing research for his thesis
there's more lmao, unhinged bitty energy
I lost it at- should be pale- and he fucking compared it to his own pasty arm. Legend
Werewolf: *transforming* You have to go, now! I don’t want you to see me like this…
Human s/o: Don’t push me away! I’m not afraid of you!!
Werewolf: No no I’m just really dumb as a wolf and I don’t want you to see me bark at a mirror for two hours
How could you hide this beautiful thing in the tags?
- Mod Naga
werewolf after waking up the next morning: I am going to kill you Human: is it because i threw werewolf: YES ITS BECAUSE YOU THREW THE STICK BUT REALLY JUST HID IT BEHIND YOUR BACK
@spiritspodcast if you haven't already seen this.
[id: drawing of a kickass-looking leather jacket with the caption ‘I THOUGHT MY LIFE WOULD SUDDENLY IMPROVE IF I GOT A LEATHER JACKET / AND I WAS LITERALLY 100% TOTALLY RIGHT]
@jointhepartypod Is this why val has a leather jacket?
Sometimes you just need to turn off the world and channel your inner cryptid ✨🌒
@spiritspodcast
I’m making it a habit to say “drac u later” when I leave a room and “I’m backula” when I enter a room
@spiritspodcast
@copperbadge
