Welcome

Amber | 30 | Any pronouns | I reblog things. I also make gifs (though I usually don't post them) and I draw. I also have a few sideblogs, including my simblr. Talk to me about mermaids and pufferfish! I speak English and Dutch. You can also talk to me in German or French, but I will reply in English if you do.

[joomeefemme]

happy friday once again 💜

[subspaceskater]

seren !

[l-mobageshiki]

[betterbemeta]

You know what would be a good story? a fat girl vampire.

can you imagine?

“I’ve never seen you eat are you insecure” “no…”

“here let me lift that for you” “I got it, thanks” *uses inhuman strength to lift bags*

“I’ve never seen you go to the beach, do you have trouble shopping for a bathing suit” “haha… yeah”

“There’s no way that girl can catch me… she’s huge!” “Hello, dinner.” *running with super fast vampire speed*

“She can’t fit in here! I’m safe!” *turns into a gas and slips under the door*

“How come you never go out?” “Well, I never get invited to parties…”

“Come to the gym with me! We should lose weight” “Not in a thousand years.” (incidentally, that’s when she was last alive.)

“You need to go on a diet!” “I’ll start with you.” *literally eats that person*

[mayakern]

hello

[neperlivafrogg]

As my yearly meme drawing (somehow I always manage to draw/make memes as nukani charas every year) I drew the 3 slavic divas (the 3 maidens from "The Three Bogatyrs") as the starter trio (and as women, ofc) + Yakumo doing the iconic braid flip

Btw I don't even know how I'm popping these so quickly, I might be cooking

It's just them look at that

igoupndowntillmypoosayhitsthegroundsodeepimakehimdrownreadyforanotherround

[shirtsthatgohard]

[fionn-o-nassus]

Not gonna lie this makes me a bit irritated. Here's the real version of this photo:

Instead of a cutesie reference to film censorship it was an explicit statement of defiance of Maryland's criminalization gay sex, which was not repealed until 2002. This wasn't a guy saying "Oh they can't put what I do in the movies according to a completely voluntary industry code" he was saying "The State of Maryland wants to put me in jail for being gay and having gay sex."

It wasn't a guy being cheeky about sex in an ambiguous, cute way. It was a man stating, in no uncertain terms, that a whole state of the United States considered him a criminal for being homosexual.

[quixoticanarchy]

i do not want to live in the fucking panopticon fuck the camera that blinks above me at work, the tv watching me at the store, the "smile you're on camera" signs, the ring cameras, the flock cameras, the apps to track your child or partner, the activist friends telling me "just assume everything you do in public is being recorded somewhere", the government building protester databases, the teslas recording every move all around them, the knowledge that everything i type or search or save is being tracked and logged, the ads and search suggestions that mysteriously know what i was just talking about, the way biometrics keep creeping into more places, the way my car spies on me, the way my phone spies on me, the way there is nowhere to go to get away from it!!! no wonder the internet is full of vindictive little stalkers and witchhunts when it's the water and the air of society from the culture to the infrastructure

[grunkypeep]

i hate when men complain about women’s body hair, even like the fine hair on their backs. go fuck a shark if you wanna have sex with something hairless

[cannedviennasnausage]

#shark skin is actually covered in tiny barbs #aka teeth #they are literally a swimming tooth

I suddenly have the urge to grate cheese on a great white

[flanoirbunny]

wouldn’t that make the shark a

grate white

[shutupandtalkgeekytome]

This post got weird

[jennytrout]

This post started with fucking hairless sharks. Weird wasn’t a destination so much as a jumping off point.

[captainclickycat]

I’ve never been so surprised not to encounter the word “smooth” in a text post

[the-final-sif]

Smooth shark post happened circa 2017, this post occurred in 2013 (posted) + pun added and 2015 (Jennytrout enhancement), years before smooth sharks would be discovered and revealed to the public.

[charl0ttan]

Out-of-place artifact - Wikipedia

[beesmygod]

[steals your baby immediately after his birth][raises him][trains him in the ways of an ancient martial art invented by cormorant fishers in 700 ad for 13 years][enters him in a tournament][he loses in 4 rounds] ok whatever. you can have him back

[johnnyspringgreens]

ok thanks [gives him estrogen][treats her like a human][helps her learn her worth][she knows now she can be whatever she wants][suddenly she wants to be world champion][enters her in a tournament][she wins in the first round but is immediately disqualified for male advantage (its coed)]

[beardedmrbean]

Someone set up a security camera to see what their 2 Belgian Malinois puppies were getting up to while they were out.

Turns out they were acting like Belgian Malinois puppies

[junewild]

incredible innovations on the beverage front

[pemprika]

estranged love

in the end, they were always one step behind one another, never fully realizing what they both needed, despite having similar circumstances, conflicts, and desires 🥺💭 how it could have been different... oh someday, somewhere, i hope they'll be able to understand each other 😭

[scaryhagmother]

White people be like: I have to take my french bulldog to the chiropractor

[scaryhagmother]

[scaryhagmother]

White people be like: I have to take my elderly cat to acupuncture

[proletprincess]

its kill her boyfriend monday

reblog to kill her boyfriend

[mirukiamauri]

Ribbon Ballerina Aurora Pink Aoi

[dogpuppy]

I wish I could have heard you sing this… I bet you have a beautiful voice

[libraford]

Googled something about quick hydration and it suggested big jug of water, couple tbsp pickle juice, dash of lime juice.

Its surprisingly tasty????

[libraford]

Pleased to report that after a day of this i am not longer craving caper brine and my mouth is not dry as usual. There's some good suggestions in the notes too that I want to try.

-ancient roman posca: water, red or white wine vinegar, honey, salt, herbs (coriander, mint, thyme)

-switchel: water, ginger, vinegar, sweetener, lemon, salt

-ayran: yogurt, water, salt, mint

-Agua pepino: water, cucumbers, lime, sugar, optional mint.

[libraford]

I have been reminded of:

-shrub: vinegar, sida water, elderberry (or other berry), sugar.

[libraford]

I have now been informed of

-sekanjabin: honey, vinegar, mint, water.

[libraford]

"Wow, I wonder why this post was popular this week."

-sees the reports of the heatwave in Europe-

"... ah."