This Superman is such a sweetie. He’s kind to the robots. He makes his girlfriend breakfast for dinner. He pretends he doesn’t care what social media thinks of him but gets genuinely upset over juvenile name calling. He tortured a despot with a cactus but the spines “weren’t that big.” He tries to capture the giant monster alive. He loves people and does his best to help them and he’s not an idiot he knows people are complicated, but he’s genuinely heartbroken when they turn on him. The idea of him having a harem is utterly ridiculous. He loses it over a pain-in-the-ass dog. He makes fun of the despot for pissing his pants. He wept at seeing an innocent man murdered. His open devastation over Mali’s murder is part of what brings Metamorpho to take the risk of helping him. He saves that weird baby. He saves a squirrel. He not only would not fuck his clone, he killed him. He makes that shithead Lex cry. His flirting with Lois is so swagless and unsubtle that her boss immediately clocks that they’re together. He loves his parents. He’s good all the way down, not because he was born that way but because he chooses to be.

















