I showed this to my husband and he said he wants four mugs like this in various states of eaten, so he can swap when no one’s looking and make it look like he’s actually eating it.
hate it when people call ada lovelace the first female programmer, when in reality she was the first programmer ever. she wrote programs for a machine before it was ever constructed
dick makes people mentally ill. dick havers, dick wannabes and dick lovers are all insane. it's like toxoplasmosis, you have compulsive need to defend and push and worship dicks all the time and spead your dick mania to everywhere you go.
this seems rational and grounded in empirical evidence
Hello hi again I can’t stop laughing to myself about this hypothetical situation so please enjoy this scene of nonsense. This is genuinely so stupid but I’ve been awake since yesterday lmao
Tags: @quasar-crew @polarspaz
It’s 9:26 AM on a Wednesday in March, and Ashley is already drinking. She winces through the burn and hands Luis back his flask while a chorus of offended and surprised noises sound from the assembled men in front of her.
What do you call it when there’s multiple of the same person? It’s a flock of birds, a school of fish, a herd of cows, a… multiverse? Paradox? A Smartass of Leons Kennedy?
She decides a paradox is probably the best call, and claps her hands together sharply to get everyone’s attention.
“Alright. We have no idea how long this is going to be, because nobody here has a degree in theoretical quantum physics, so while you’re all here, you all need nicknames. We can’t call you all by the same name, I’m already nursing a migraine and this hasn’t even started,” Ashley announces.
The little one, the one that looks the most like her Leon, raises a hand awkwardly like she’s a teacher.
“None of you get to be Leon. To keep it fair.”
His hand goes down. Luis snickers faintly somewhere on the far side of the whiteboard that was dragged outside. He’s working on… something. A PoliSci minor doesn’t exactly qualify her to sit at the big kids table when it comes to biochemical engineering.
Ashley points at her Leon, who raises an eyebrow in return. “Infected with a normal Plaga, that was modified with an injection from Luis while we were in Spain. You’re our Leon, from here. Name suggestions?”
Her Leon shrugs. “Local?”
She writes ‘LOCAL’ on the sticky nametag and starts to pass it over, then thinks better, instead popping up onto tiptoes to slap it on his ribs.
“So we can all read it, not just those of you who have to duck on escalators,” she explains. He nods in agreement, then wanders off to whisper with his boyfriend like a giant highschooler in a boring class. Very helpful.
Ashley points to the next Leon, the little one that raised his hand. “Plaga. Spain?”
He fidgets with the hem of an obviously too small sweater before he answers. “A genetically altered mutualistic Plaga, in Raccoon City.”
There’s murmurs at that, and the little one looks awkwardly at his feet.
“How old are you?”
“Twenty-four?”
More cross-chatter arises as Ashley prints ‘ROOKIE’ onto the next sticky tag. The little guy takes it with a sheepish smile (or close enough with mandibles) and carefully applies it to his shirt.
The Leon that looks alarmingly like the red robed verdugo with hair is next. He’s sat on the grass with his tail curled around him, looking at her expectantly.
“Let me guess. Plaga, Spain, it just mutated you in a different way? Am I close?”
He nods, then makes a noise that reminds Ashley of a junebug trapped in a screen door.
“Sorry, I… I have no idea what you just said,” she tells him.
“He said you’re right,” Rookie pipes up. “He also said that he can’t really talk.”
Ashley blinks, then decides that she’s not getting paid enough to dig into how that translation worked. “Great. You got a nickname?”
She gets a shrug back, and another chittering noise. Both of them turn to Rookie, who again, looks bashful at the attention. “He said that the only nicknames he has are… from Luis, and ‘not necessarily for mixed company.’”
Ashley snorts. “Well, we have to call you something. Even if it’s pervy Spanish.”
His eyes scrunch up happily and he says something else, and Rookie nods. “Scotty?”
Ashley nods, and writes out ‘SCOTTY’ on his nametag.
“Most of you look pretty… normal,” she hazards. It’s true, they really do just look like normal human Leon, in unfamiliar clothes. “Are you all infected, or like… normal, or…?”
“Stole the power of a demonic Plaga and now I can turn into a Devil.”
“Cursed necklace turns me into a dragon when I take it off.”
“Mini Godzilla.”
There’s a long beat of silence as everyone stares at each other, and Ashley contemplates taking up recreational drug use.
“You know what, I’m—I’m not getting into all of that right now,” she says, squeezing her temples before she quickly jots down ‘DEVIL’, ‘DRAGON’, and ‘KAIJU’. “I don’t know what kind of insane dimensions you’re all from, and honestly I don’t think I want to.”
“You guys don’t have a Godzilla?” Kaiju asks, sticking his tag on without complaint.
“We do. It’s a movie. With a guy in a rubber costume stomping on a cardboard Tokyo, not in real life. No demons or dragons, either,” Ashley tells them.
“Technically not a demon,” Devil says with a shrug. “There’s a difference.”
“Okay, so what is the difference?”
He takes a beat. “Semantics, mostly, I think. I don’t actually know. Dante tried to explain it one time, but it didn’t make much sense.”
“… cool. Anyways,” she steamrolls through the conversation, not wanting to get into the idea of Real Actual Dragons at the moment. “You’re pretty quiet, face mask, what’s your deal?”
From god only knows what pocket of a tactical belt, out comes a tiny notepad and a ballpoint pen.
‘T-virus, r. City. ‘Zombie’ is fine.’
Ashley shrugs, and writes out ‘ZOMBIE’. “Kinda dark, but you said it, not me, so whatever.”
There’s another long pause as she looks the only one left sans nametag.
“Does everybody else see—“
“Yeah,” Dragon agrees quickly. “Probably a curse, or something. I don’t think there’s any virus or parasite that does… that.”
Ashley doesn’t even look down as she writes on the last tag, handing it directly to what appears to be an actual straight-up panda in a compression shirt. The hair is right, but if that’s actually a Leon and actually what he looks like, the man is fully pulling a Donald Duck right now in front of god and everybody.
“That’s… different,” Rookie says. Scotty chatters in agreement.
Ashley sighs, and buries her face in her hands. “I have to make so many pants,” she groans.
———
Ashley: so the multiverse really wants to see your ass, I guess
Okay this is just WAY too cute! I love getting to see the Leon's together interacting like this!
Like seriously, the way Ashley goes through each Leon, giving them name tags and nicknames while figuring out what their deal is, was hilarious and adorable.
The progressive reveal of each Leon was UTTERLY PERFECT too! Meeting the infected bug Leons first, and then Devil, Dragon and Godzilla Leon, before finally ending on Panda Leon, literally had me cracking up so hard!
OH this WAS GREAT! I had so much fun reading this! Thank you so much for sharing!
explained to an 8 year old that once a fruit is ripe you only have so much time until it rots so you have to eat it soon and she said so i'll never be able to keep it perfect like this forever? no and there are about a million pieces of art for you unrelatedly
(a friend and I were discussing how you seem to put Leon in any and all media, and we were wondering how far it goes...)
I sat at my desk and looked at this ask for weeks, thinking..
"Should I really do this? Should I REALLY spawn this nefarious nightmare into existence???"
And then was I like...fuck it.
Challenge accepted.
((Like..wtf are these things anyway? Babies? Bears? Monkeys?
Also pro tip for drawing Teletubbies, you gotta be REALLY careful when drawing them cause one wrong slip and you're now in uncanny nightmare valley.))
Great news! MERCH IS HERE!! We didn’t think we’d be able to do it this year given the state of, well, everything in the world, but we are proud to announce that we figured it out and are ready to go.
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(http://dashcontwo-merch.shop/)
DashCon 2 presents…
The Revolution, Baby! Collection
LIMITED EDITION GUILLOTINE MERCH
We hope you enjoy. Like before, this merch is 100% pre-order. Merch will ship out ONLY after the convention has concluded. (We’re shipping all this out ourselves, and we need time.)
Merch can also be picked up at the pre-registration event AND at the convention itself. (Merch assigned for convention pickup that isn’t picked up at pre-registration will be brought to both Saturday and Sunday until it is picked up by its purchaser.)
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As you might’ve seen on our Tumblr, one of the things that has caused us significant delays in rolling out our merch is the unpredictable situation with US tariffs. We had a lot of problems shipping out orders last year because of this, and it doesn’t seem to be getting any simpler anytime soon. In the meantime, until Trump’s Section 122 Tariffs expire, you can use the code NO-122 at checkout to avoid paying this 10% tariff on select items.
One of my favourite restaurants being a filming location in the vampire lestat is awesome because wow cool that's two of my favourite things having a surreal crossover but also because it gave me the inspiration to make this for my friend's birthday
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