an excessive number of oranges

avoiding concrete identifiers since infancy

[andhumanslovedstories]

I’m worried when it comes to fictional characters and the impact their stories made upon me, the dead wife haunting my narrative is Natasha Romanoff. My once beloved, now fraught partner who I was in the process of divorcing but first we went on one last trip to see if we could save our marriage, during which we for some reason made the choice to visit Dead Woman Cliff (The Cliff For Killing Women) and well. You can imagine how this complicated the grieving process. Why do we even have that cliff.

[andhumanslovedstories]

I’m worried when it comes to fictional characters and the impact their stories made upon me, the dead wife haunting my narrative is Natasha Romanoff. My once beloved, now fraught partner who I was in the process of divorcing but first we went on one last trip to see if we could save our marriage, during which we for some reason made the choice to visit Dead Woman Cliff (The Cliff For Killing Women) and well. You can imagine how this complicated the grieving process. Why do we even have that cliff.

[anti-parent]

teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek

[anti-parent]

fantastic. i love it. i posted this after my wife said it yesterday and as i was doing it i was like "this can't be an original thought. as soon as i hit post someone's going to say 'you stole this from a tweet from 2014' and i'll say 'no, i stole it from my beautiful wife.'"

[beardedmrbean]

Next up someone is going to claim that the Narnia series isn't kids books.

Kids books is probably not the best way to word it, you can enjoy them at every age, including your childhood, as you get older you may find new truths in them, but they're still good for any age.

[hateusandseeifwemind]

[pinene]

Can anyone explain wtf is going on here especially a Korean speaker

[tadeadshihamurder]

someone on reddit explained 😭

[no-one-offical]

‎

[desmolbean404]

That is one of the most astronomical fuck up translations I have ever seen.

[once-a-polecat]

This is badass: Medieval Nubian Fashion Brought to Life. Click through to the link because there’s more replica clothing and it is all stunning!

[eyes-alight]

[emotargaryen]

one of the tweets of all time to me

[1794]

mustard snob canon

[angel-derangement]

“we live in an uncaring universe” yeah dude and I live in an uncaring house. and I shit in an uncaring toilet. but do you touch an uncaring lover? do you comfort an uncaring child? do you guide to sleep each night a cold and uncaring self?

[angel-derangement]

please hurry up in reblogging this I wanna jorts it before someone puts it in one of those heartwarming tiktok slideshows

[ablubluh]

i was like 'what could jorts it possibly mean' but as with many things clicking the original post immediately clarified the situation

[lesvegas]

passing in public makes me feel like white shrek

[lesvegas]

literally how it feels

[welpnotagain]

[bedpsyching]

Things I hate: fan made pokemon gender differences

[butterbeanchu]

YO THESE ARE FUCKING HALARIOUS

Like fan made stuff goes all out but in reality Pokemon gender differences are the most mundane shit

Only goes gen 1-4 tho

[aberrantemotion]

Yea thats how animals work

[bacony-cakes]

they fuckin gave charizard nidoqueen tits

[pokemonheritageposts]

Pokemon Heritage Post

[voidartisan]

I think the Jedi council should have at least considered sending obi-wan over to Dooku to be like “yes hello I am here for sith training” just to see what would happen

[voidartisan]

Like, we know from the rako hardeen arc that he’s a good enough actor to pull this off. Combined with Dooku’s clear affection(?) for him, I think the council would have most of the separatists’ top military secrets in a month, max

[voidartisan]

I mean, even if Obi-Wan got caught transmitting information

Dooku:…what are you doing

Obi-Wan, panicking slightly: I’m a double agent. Passing them bad intel.

Dooku: I didn’t ask you to do that

Obi-Wan: …i’m taking initiative????

Dooku:

Dooku: We’ll it’s about time SOMEONE around here did

[voidartisan]

Palpatine: There have been far too many “coincidences” with the Jedi lately. The information your new apprentice is transmitting is accurate, I’m sure of it.

Dooku: My boy would never do such a thing

Palpatine: Your b— you know, the whole “no attachments” is a Jedi thing but I think we need to have a talk

[terapsina]

Let's just add another layer to this cuz I bet that LIKE the Raako Hardeen incident no one tells Anakin anything.

So we also have an unhinged (but in the OTHER direction) Anakin chasing Obi-Wan across the galaxy going: 'Come back to the light side, Master, you're my brother!'

So now Palpatine's dealing with the unexpected headache of his planned future apprentice being too busy trying to de-sithify the not-actually-a-sith!Obi-Wan to get sithified himself.

[wolverina2002]

Anakin suddenly throwing himself hard into being the perfect Jedi to guide his master back to the light is hilarious

[not-your-average-url]

I miss when ads were a single click and then they’re gone. Now every ad has a minimum of three phases where you watch a video, exit the still frame of fake gameplay, and then exit the app download. That doesn’t even touch on the ones that forcibly take you to another app after opening a tab in safari without you ever touching the screen.

I hate advertising. I hate that you can’t do anything without companies jumping down your throat with mostly bullshit ads. I hate that billboards exist. I hate that every company unanimously decided to make their ads longer and longer. I hate that ad blockers try to charge you money and there are in app purchases to remove ads. I hate that my attention has become commodified. I hate that there’s nothing I can do about it.

[chillyfeetsteak]

a few doors down from me my neighbors have a squirrel bar nailed to the tree in front of the sidewalk, not exactly this but something like this:

it's been there for years and they never "stock" it so it's just sitting there. anyway, i thought it would be cute to make a little squirrel out of sculpey and leave it on one of the stools in the middle of the night. i also made a little sculpey beer bottle with its own label.

it lasted exactly one day and now it is gone. it didn't fall off, i stuck it on with tape. what do you think happened to it? your most fantastical and wrong answers only, please

[chillyfeetsteak]

HUGE NEWS HUGE UPDATE

squirrel REAPPEARED today... NOW PAINTED

[chillyfeetsteak]

i wanted to provide another update because there has been more activity at the nut bar

a few weeks ago i sculpted a new patron:

and put him in the bar. the next day he was gone. a couple weeks later he reappeared painted... but with ANOTHER new guest: a 3D printed squirrel based on the first one i sculpted (with a bottle!)

:)

[dogpuppy]

[snarling-through-our-smiles]

[hypokeimena]

image description: tweet by olayemi olurin @/msolurin, reading: There's no high like making a successful hail mary argument. A prosecutor once asked for bail on my client because he had like 63 convictions and I was like judge... 63 convictions sounds like a man who showed up to court at least 63 times. And the judge was like yea you right /end description

[hattersarts]

gossip rag

[taraxippos]

I think this is the single funniest artfight rule. Like....I guess?

[taraxippos]

[taraxippos]

WHO DID THIS