Vodka a(lien)unt

big love mood big healing mood 

[lymphonodge]

scrappy doo has been found dead in miami

[snootgaze-deactivated20170620]

is he okay

[lymphonodge]

hes alright but he died

[phantomrose96]

Get your ducks in a row. Now get them in a circle. Get them in a Socratic seminar with that duck in the middle. Get them in a mosh pit. Get them moshing. Get them moshing.

[hydrachea]

> turns on my computer

> disables a new AI feature that was turned on by default

> opens my email

> disables a new AI feature that was turned on by default

> launches a software

> disables a new AI fea

[vinceaddams]

It's nice that loud noises don't stick to clothes like smells do. That would be really bad if they did.

[sunbutch]

if you call women “females” i automatically do not trust or like you

[cryptic-crassulaceae]

you really wont like the military then buddy

[sunbutch]

jokes on you, i already hate the military

[hppjmxrgosg]

proud victim of the tumblr accent. it's fading out of public consciousness as the tik tok accent takes precedence; a linguistic evolution that makes the tumblr accent 85% funnier to unsuspecting civilians. it's like releasing a disease on a non-inoculated population. coughing baby versus hydrogen bomb.

[loreleywrites]

you solve the mystery of what to have for dinner one night and you think "hell yeah case closed forever" WRONG there is a dinner mystery the next night too

[everythingfoxes]

[foxpost-generator]

it fucken WIMDY

[foxpost-generator]

girk at my work discovered my terrible secret

[cognitohazardous]

no one says big mood anymore. no one even says mood. no one says anything. all thats left is a dry wind, that scours my face until i bleed

[cykelops]

I have had a lot of evil people say to me that nothing taste as good as skinny feels and every time im like no im pretty sure food tastes really super good actually

[omtai]

Does anyone care if the boulder is happy does anyone imagine the boulder to be happy? Or is everything about that other guy

[steveyockey]

affirmations they will not kill me at work today. it is not in my job description to get killed. if they did kill me at work that would be weird and probably not worth it for them

[ot3]

its awesome that neither mind reading nor god are real and all of the thoughts inside of your head are completely private and consequenceless forever #myprivacy

[ewaneneollav]

you’re one of the three survivors after the apocalypse & the other two are visibly passing one of theirs’ phones back & forth having a secret conversation in a notes app

[pansy2025]

things used to be $5

[tetitasdelimon]

top 5 horror movies

-having a job

-not having a job

-applying for jobs

-the job market

-the concept of working my whole life

[sawed-on-shotgun]

hello my name is Stray Hair snd my big dream is to play the itsy bitsy spider on broadway. doyou mind if i practice on the side of your head.