a tribe called human.

[atribecalledhuman]

For most of us, the journey for self-acceptance can be incredibly difficult. The world around us gets in the way of our discovery. But for 23 year old Charlie Dill, as a member of the transgender community, the journey was at times more complicated than most.

M: Where are you from? What was it like growing up?

C: I'm from Tampa, Florida. Growing up was...interesting. I mean it was a lot of awesome interspersed with periods of terribleness, really. It'd take forever to get into all that though. I had my share of troubles but it was very far from all bad. I'm grateful for the not-so-pleasant circumstances that shaped me even though they were bad at the time because I'm quite pleased with the person I grew into.

M: At what age did you begin to realize who you were, or did you always know?

C: Gender confusion has always sort of been there and became more prevalent in my teen years but I didn't really figure out my identity until three years ago or so.

M: How did your family react to your coming out as transgender? Your friends?

C: My family doesn't really know what to think of the whole thing, to be honest. They are super supportive and for that I am extremely grateful because I know a lot of people aren't as accepting about this whole thing. I don't think they really fully understand it, but that's okay. My friends are amazing about the whole thing and those that are close to me have shown unwavering support and understanding.

M: What was it like realizing who you were? Was it a difficult process?

C: It was a very long and denial-filled process, really. At first I was scared to identify as male completely and thought I just might be genderqueer (identifying as both male and female). It took me some time to realize that I was just fooling myself about that bit to keep things more familiar while I got used to the idea. Accepting my identity as male fully was the most amazing thing, though. It made a lot of things make sense and it just felt right. I didn't have to lie to myself anymore. It felt like coming home.

M: What’s your preferred pronoun, and do people actually use that (or do they dismiss it)?

C: My preferred pronouns are male. He/him/his and all that. My family has difficulties with the pronoun business but I understand it, old habits die hard. My friends have always been really good about it for the most part. I've had issues with the occasional friend not taking it seriously but after I've talked with them things got sorted out.

M: Was there more positive or negative reaction when you came out? How did you take that?

C: Definitely more positive reaction and I was extremely relieved about that. As I touched on before, I'm so so grateful for having a supportive environment around me. A lot of trans people get disowned or even hurt for their identity so I am always so thankful that I have it so good.

 M: What’s the number one question you get the most, or do people ask anything at all?

C: The question I get the most is about surgeries. Whether it's asking about what different procedures there are or asking which ones I plan on getting done or even asking if I've had “THE surgery” yet (which is frustratingly vague there's not just one surgery, transitioning from one gender to another is much more complicated than that and transitioning is different for everyone), it seems to be a topic that people are super interested in.

 M: What do you want all cisgender people to know about transgender issues/people?

C: I think the most important thing is we're just like you. Which is especially important when it comes to the genital question or the “how do you have sex?” question. If you'd be uncomfortable answering those questions yourself, don't ask someone who's trans those questions unless you know they're comfortable with it.

M: Do you feel like in the LGBTQA rights movements that trans issues are overlooked?

C: The thing about the LGBTQA community is it seems very far from a unified front a lot of the time. It's like in high school, everyone has their own cliques. So yeah, trans issues (and bisexual issues, and asexual issues, and a myriad of other groups' issues too) tend to seem pretty overlooked by people who aren't actually members of those specific sub-communities. I do think, though, that things are getting better and a sense of unity is increasingly easier to spot. 

[atribecalledhuman]

A Hairtastic Success!

By Alesha Elbert

Family/Relationship Writer

    We were all created for a purpose. We have talents within us, some we embrace and some that are still undiscovered. But as life goes on, we begin to find traits within ourselves that make us who we are and shapes us into the successful being we were always meant to be. Some people say that certain careers in life won’t bring success, but here’s a story to prove that no matter what your calling may be, you can find success in it!

    Cassandra Hunter, 35, is an East Dublin, Georgia native. She grew up throughout the area of Dublin, Georgia where early in life, her path was set in what her career would consist of: hair. In the sixth grade she wanted to see what great things could come from her learning how to style hair. Hunter began with her sister, trying braids, to see if she was up for the challenge. “My sister was in 9th grade and I was still in middle school, but she told me she liked it. From then on, my mom let me do her hair and even my mother’s friends began coming to me.” Her clientele began to grow! By putting her all into what she really wanted to do, great things started coming her way.

    Hunter decided that this career was meant for her, so why not begin to take it seriously? She attended the Kevosnik School of Hair and Design Inc. to become a licensed cosmetologist. “Taking the test was difficult, but it wasn’t impossible. I just had to work hard for something I wanted.” She was driven to do her best, and it all worked out in her favor. Hunter dream of owning her own salon were finally a reality,within her own salon, and it’s only a few feet from her home! She is a living witness that dreams can be made right in your backyard. Her business is called DarknLovely Styles. The name being inspired by her complexion that she loves so much and styles going along with what she enjoys doing for a living.

    When I asked Hunter on a more personal note about her family she spoke of great things. “My family, their great! I had a few issues, my daughter made me a grandmother. And that came as a shock, but it’s good. She’s a senior in high school, keeping a great GPA, and has received a scholarship from Claflin University of South Carolina.” She continued on speaking on the success of her other children and husband. “My oldest child, he is in college and is working. My other son is extremely athletic and plays almost every sport. Football, basketball, you name it. And my baby girl is keeping her grades up. Also my husband, great. He’s a finance manager for a car dealership. We’re all doing great.” With her being a mother of four and a loving wife, I knew that there was a lot to be said about her support for everyone. You could hear the enthusiasm in her voice that her family motivates her to continue to strive for success, such as how they have done so greatly with their lives as well.

    As time goes on, Hunter hopes to expand her shop and to bring in more stylists to help her along the way. She puts all her trust in God to obtain any success that she needs to reach her goals. For those on a mission to have the same career path as hers she leaves this message: “If you want to be successful, it can be done. If you want to be a master cosmetologist, it can be done. Take your time. Don’t rush when it comes to your clients because once you build your clientele, if you do what you’re supposed to do, they will follow. Do what you have to do to be a great stylist and you will grow.”

    Don’t ever think that certain careers cannot achieve greatness. Set your mind to what you want to do, and stick with it. Because when something is your passion, you can do anything but fail.

[atribecalledhuman]

Pursuing Your Passion with Michelle Maddox

Pursuing Your Passion with Michelle Maddox

By: Alia Lewis

Empowerment Writer

  How does a career driven woman leave Corporate America to pursue her two passions and turn them into a business?

Michelle Maddox is an ambitious business owner who recently risked it all to combine her two loves- makeup and event planning into one Pretty Cute Boutique.

Faced with initial doubt, she realized that in order to succeed, she had silence her own inner critic.

“I got discouraged often because I didn’t think I was good enough.” Maddox said.

“We tend to be our own biggest critics.”

By realizing that she was already equipped with everything she needed to succeed- knowledge, talent, and support, Maddox took a leap of faith and dived into entrepreneurship full time.

“A career isn’t necessarily Corporate America or an everyday 9-5, it’s what you make it. The same way we try to give our employer 110%, use that 110% to put toward your own business.” Maddox said.

Maddox fully believes in working hard to get where you intend to go.

“If you don’t work at it, you can’t expect to get anything out of it.” Maddox said.

For those looking to turn their passions into a business, Maddox offers this advice….

1.)    Network

“Networking is very important because it opens you up to different ideas, introduces you to new people, and provides more information about your particular business.” Maddox understands that networking brings experience by opening your eyes to different pros and cons of a business. “Networking is pivotal to your success.” said Maddox.

2.)    Tap Into Your Gifts

“When you really love something, don’t put it on the back burner. Don’t question yourself too much. Pray and work toward making it perfection.” Maddox said.

“We have our gifts and talents for a reason. I don’t think it’s for us to just sit on while working in Corporate America, or sit at home salivating over  YouTube videos while watching others tap into their talents. No need to hope and wish you could become that person as well. You can! Tap into your gifts.” Maddox said.

3.)    Pray Often and Seek Advice

Michelle suggest that emerging business owners pray about their business, do their research by selecting the pros and cons, and seek wise counsel. “Be open and receptive to advice.” “Shoot for the stars.” Maddox said.

Overall, over the course of her life, Maddox has learned many tips that has and will continue to contribute to her business. She wants to encourage others to tap into their gifts and pursue their passion.

“My gift is not my own. I view it as a type of ministry to teach, motivate, and inspire others.” If you have any other questions for Maddox or would like to reach out to her, you can contact her here.

[atribecalledhuman]

Hey people! So starting TODAY the Authentically Human team will be doing a BACK TO SCHOOL GIVEAWAY! We know how hard it is as college students or even parents who have children to pay for the things we need for our classes, and for college students, dorm needs. So here is a chance for us to help you out, plus its FREE.

RULES:  *You must share at LEAST 3 of our posts from our website either on Facebook, Twitter, or Tumblr. 

*** BUT your name will be placed in a random generator, which means, the more posts you share, the higher your chances will be to win!

Your Prize: A $25 Visa card! Take it to any store of your choosing.

The giveaway starts NOW! The deadline ends Thursday, August 14th. Remember to check out all new posts everyday! Thank you all for the support!

[atribecalledhuman]

Answering the Call: Elaine Lysaker

By Michelle Norsworthy

Culture & Spirituality

  “Accept me as I am, because I accept you for who you are.”

It’s a motto 42-year-old Elaine Lysaker has lived by for as long as she can remember. As a young child, she found herself the subject of abuse by an alcoholic father. However, she found her strength in her mother and 41-year-old brother Dan.

As she grew older, Lysaker pushed those unfortunate memories. “It wasn’t until I got older that I even remembered who he was,” Lysaker said. After a split between her parents, her father disappeared from the picture. “I just remembered that he wasn’t around. He made promises he didn’t keep.”

Refusing to let her past haunt her, Lysaker turned all of her focus on school. Growing up, she moved from one small town to another, and had transferred schools nearly 40 times in just five years. “I had to make friends quick, giving my gift of gab. I [learned to] talk to anybody about any situation.”

In her first year of high school, Lysaker met her first husband. At 16, she had no choice but to drop out of high school. “I did go back to school,”  Lysaker said, “but they told me I would have to repeat and go to summer school, and I didn’t have the money for that and neither did [my husband].”

Lysaker received her GED shortly after should would’ve had graduated high school, but found herself putting her career on hold to follow her husband wherever his work took them. After six years, they decided to separate and, eventually, divorce. “We got married young. We grew up and grew apart, basically. You know, we just wanted different things.” Despite the split, the two remain friends.

Some time later, Lysaker found herself the manager of a restaurant in Thomaston, Georgia. It was there that she met the father of her child. However, the new couple was not a happy surprise in her family. “Mom knew he was African American, my baby sister and brother knew. My step-dad didn’t know until we got to the house.”

The surprise was not well-received, but her immediate family remained civil. Unfortunately, as news spread that she was in an interracial relationship and carrying his child, family members ostracized her. Lysaker wasn’t allowed into the homes of several relatives, and couldn’t attend holiday gatherings. “It hurt a little,” Lysaker said. Though many family members turned their back on her, she refused to become bitter. “That’s them, their opinion. Let them do what they want because I feel like you need to please yourself. Do what makes you happy and everyone around you, who loves you, will be happy. If not, then they shouldn’t be around you anyway.”

It wasn’t until the birth of her daughter that things began to change. “After [my stepdad] held her, that was all she wrote. Nobody was allowed talk about it anymore. That was his grandbaby and if someone didn’t like it, ‘Get the hell out,’ he’d say.”

This newfound support came as Lysaker found herself a single mother. With a firm support system backing her, she entered into the workforce with a fury. Often taking on multiple jobs, Lysaker began to become stretched too thin. Single parenthood began to take it’s toll. “There were some growing times,” she said, “but God doesn’t close one door without opening another. You may not know why that door got closed, or why another got opened, but you have to take it in faith.”

Faith played a crucial role as Lysaker found herself entering a new phase in her life. In 2006, she decided to return to school. She attended school, aiming to get a degree in pediatric nursing. But life, and God, had other plans. “I still wanted to do something with children,” Lysaker said. She says that the birth of her daughter made her realize what her true calling in life was – helping children.

“I used to hand-make worksheets for my baby brother and sister,” Lysaker said, “but I didn’t realize what it meant at the time.”

After switching her major to Early Childhood Education, she found herself exactly where she needed to be: Head Start. Head Start is a federally funded education program that caters to low-income families. At the center where Lysaker works, not only do children in low-income families receive the social, emotional, and cognitive attention they need, but parents get connected with resources in the community.

“At that age, their minds are like sponges – they love to learn. When they learn something, they have a unique perspective and they wind up teaching you more than you teach them,” Lysaker said.

When asked, she said that there was no other place she wanted to be than where she was. Calling it a sign from God, Lysaker firmly believes that, “If there’s something you really wanna do – first make sure it’s legal. If there’s a goal you wanna reach, even if you have to put it back a little bit, don’t forget it’s there. Stick with it. Don’t tell yourself you can’t do it. If you want it, go for it.”

[atribecalledhuman]

Blessings in Disguise

By Michelle Norsworthy

Culture & Spirituality

  Everyone loves to be blessed. It’s the facts of life, but not all blessings are as obvious as a $40 gift card to our favorite clothing stores. Sometimes, blessings come to us in the form of something else entirely.

They come disguised as terrible or otherwise unfortunate events. When, just as we get paid, the car breaks down or we remember there’s a phone bill payment that’s slipped our mind. How in the world are these things blessings?

As with most things in life, it’s a matter of perspective.  Our first reaction is to go, “Dang! Every time I get a little bit of money!” However, if we look at these same scenarios and say, “At least it happened when I actually got money,” then we begin to see where the seemingly bad is actually good.

For example, just as my mom was blessed with some money, the car broke – a leak in the fuel line. Guess what? One tiny spark and we could’ve gone KABOOM! The mechanic told us that something as small as a cigarette being tossed under the car could’ve sent everything in flames. Want to know what’s crazier? Not even 24 hours later (in a different vehicle, thank God), someone tossed a lit cigarette under the car! While it wasn’t exactly the best time to be slapped with a repair bill out the yang, the situation would’ve been twice as bad had 1) we actually been in the car when the cigarette from Hell appeared and 2) we not have had the money when the fuel line got a hole in it.

Most events may not be as serious as this – and some may be even more dire -  but there’s a common piece in every situation: perspective.

It is difficult to see these blessings in situations like these. Especially when it comes packaged in a man-eating box with a thorny bow on top. But when we take a beat, breathe, and assess the situation, we can easily flip our way of thinking. Not only does this transform our negative thoughts into positive ones, but it helps alleviate stress.

How many times have you been cornered with fifty-million things to do, and all of them need to be done at the worst possible time? Regardless if you’re in high school, college, or taking the workforce by storm, we’ve all been there and done that. It’s overwhelming and sometimes we just want to give everything the big FU and take a nap. Am I right (or is that nap thing just me)?

But (here it goes) it doesn’t have to be that way. The next time you get overwhelmed, remember to see the situation from a different point of view. What are the good things that can come from this? Don’t just get your obvious blessings, go get the ones in disguise too!

x

[atribecalledhuman]

Persevering To the End

By Alesha Elbert

Family/Relationship Writer

    We all were put on this Earth for a purpose. We set goals and hope for the greatest outcome. However, for some people, things aren’t handed to them on a silver platter. They have to push themselves to reach for success. Sometimes we may set goals that may seem to be unrealistic, but in the end, the plan that was set for our lives will come to pass, no matter how hard we may try to fight it. To persevere means to finish strong despite the obstacles and hassles in your way. This week I spoke with a man who understands that the battle is not won until you have finished to the end.

    Clifford Larris Hunter Jr., 41, was born and raised in Wrightsville, Georgia. He graduated from Johnson County High School, where he was supposed to graduate within the top 3 of his class. Within this time period, there was discrimination that prevented him from achieving success within this area of school, but that did not stop Hunter. He furthered his academia at Heart of Georgia where he achieved his Associate’s degree in Respiratory Therapy. He also has a year of college through Andersonville Theological Seminary, where he has been educated in Ministerial Theological works. What really drew him into the medical field was the fact that it was always apart of his life. “I can remember probably remember when I was in the 6th or 7th grade people would always give me medical books. My dad would just give me books and encyclopedias and I would just read those books,” says Hunter.

    However, the original plan for Hunter was to become a physician. However, his health began to take control over his life. While he was in college, his kidneys began to fail. He was in dire need of a transplant. His sister, Latosha Elbert, blessed him with one of her own kidneys so that he could continue on his life today. Even though life became very hard for Hunter after the surgery, he knew that his time was not done on this Earth. He still pushed to be apart of the medical field thus resulting in him being a respiratory therapist. “I’ve liked the field. It is a very interesting and rewarding field at the same time.” He currently works at Putnam General Hospital in Eaton, Georgia.  

    Hunter has so many accomplishments and career paths it’s outstanding. He is a radio DJ for 107.9 FM, where he plays Gospel music every Sunday and also gives empowerment and motivation through his air time. He is also the Vice President of ManUp of Georgia. When I asked Hunter what this program does he responded with this statement: “It is an organization designed to help men and to fight fatherhood absenteeism and to help boys become men.” As you can see, Hunter has a great deal in changing the mindset of those within the communities of the middle Georgia area. Which brought us to our next topic within his career path: ministry.

    “I have been pastoring for about eight years now and this is something I have really enjoyed doing.” As a child, Hunter carried his Bible to school with him. He also loved playing church with his siblings when they were growing up, but for a while he feared being focused so much on God. He ran away from the preaching and teachings of God because he did not think that pastoring was meant to be apart of his life. However, at the age of 28 he heard a voice asking him how long would he run away from his calling. This gave him the push to turn his life around and commit to what God had always had written in his plan for him. He is currently the pastor of Heaven’s Haven Baptist Church, located in East Dublin, Georgia. As Hunter said, “God placed upon my heart to build a ministry, from scratch, and we’ve been here for two years now. It’s something that we really enjoy doing.” With this church, the members are meant to be a great representative of light, wherever they go, so that men and women are compelled to turn to God.

    Although Hunter has accomplished many goals in his life, he is still aspiring for more. “I want to go back to school. I also want to build a ministry that prepares people for life. I want to enjoy life.” He strongly believes in empowering people through kingdom living. He feels that there are so many people, even with the church, that understand what the kingdom is and where they may be going, but they aren’t empowered. As a member of Hunter’s church, I can say that he teaches a great deal, rather than preaches. Granting his members with knowledge behind the kingdom and what God has planned for your life.

    Hunter is a great example on how life will not be an easy road, but you must continue to push through the struggles you encounter. “I’ve always been a persevering type of person. We run into a lot of issues, problems, struggles, but yet the thing is to persevere. That has always been my thing.” He continues to keep a leveled mind and motivational heart. For those who may be battling problems and frustrations, but still want to achieve goals, he leaves these words with you: “Even though you see the goal, it does not mean it is right in front of you. You have to work hard, push yourself, and sacrifice to get to it. Don’t sacrifice so many years of doing nothing before you try to achieve your goal.”

[atribecalledhuman]

The Journey to Success with Briana Farley

The Journey to Success with Briana Farley

By: Alia Lewis

Empowerment Writer

                  When Briana Farley began college as an eager and ambitious freshman, she didn’t think she would have to attend 3 different colleges by junior year. Like most students, Farley, 23, only wanted to achieve her dream of becoming a pediatric nurse practitioner, and refused to allow any obstacle to get in her way. Currently a thriving junior nursing student at Emory University, Farley can remember a time when her dream of attending Emory seemed far from reality.

      “I didn’t think I was smart enough to get in.” says Farley.

      Faced with her own inner criticism, Farley figured a bridge program was the best route for attending Emory.

      Freshly out of high school, Farley attended Berry College, with the guarantee of being successfully transferred to Emory nursing school in 3 years.

      Unfortunately, while blissfully preparing for her transfer, Farley called Emory and discovered there was no guarantee, only empty promises and a spot on the waiting list.

      Disappointed, Farley transferred to a more affordable and academically manageable school, Kennesaw State University. There she reevaluated her Emory plan and decided to work effortlessly toward her goal of getting into any nursing school, including Kennesaw.

      Despite countless attempts to attend nursing school at Kennesaw and other universities, she didn’t get in.

      Once again, she got discouraged.

      “I thought to get another major.” Says Farley.

      Farley was running out of time, money, and patience toward her dream.

      “My mom suggested to apply to Emory.” Says Farley.

      Out of options and with nothing to lose, she took her mom’s advice.

      In the meantime of attending classes at Kennesaw and applying for nursing school, Farley worked at Wendy’s.

      While working she would get disheartened at the perceptions people placed on her.

      “People thought I dropped out. They looked down on me.” Said Farley

      During those times when it seemed like the entire world didn’t believe in her, Farley found encouragement in her mom, her friend Holly, college threads, and gospel songs.

      Despite seeing her previous classmates walk across the graduation stage without her, Farley constantly worked hard at keeping her grades up and applying for scholarships.

      Eventually, after reapplying to Emory and filling out many scholarships, Farley got readmitted into Emory University and received enough scholarship money to cover tuition!

      Today Farley is thriving at Emory. She feels appreciated and supported to accomplish anything at the school.

      “Everything worked out.” Said Farley

      Despite her lengthy journey, she embraces the timing of her acceptance and the experiences she had while on her journey.

      She says Berry taught her to try hard. She’s always had a goal for herself and always wanted to make a 4.0 GPA.

      She refused to give up.

      Farley encourages everyone to aim high when chasing their dreams.

      Her advice: “Don’t wait until the last minute to look at things.”

      Farley recognizes that her timeliness was a big issue with school.

      “I was late because I missed deadlines.” Says Farley.

      For students who want to attend nursing school, Farley reveals that nursing school is manageable. Although it can be a lot of work, Farley suggests you “stay on top of your game.”

      Through it all, Farley stayed focused and accomplished her goal despite the circumstances. With her being 23 and still is school, she encourages everyone to excel no matter their age.

      “Always aim high. Age is nothing but a number. Don’t let your age define who you want to be.” Says Farley.

      Now with one dream checked off the list, Farley hopes to finish school, begin working as a pediatric nurse, and eventually receive her masters in hopes to check off her ultimate dream of becoming a pediatric nurse practitioner.

      Through her journey, Farley has defined success and proven that she can only elevate from here.

[atribecalledhuman]

Is it selfish (unhealthily so) to break up with someone because they are unemployed? The person in question has been without a job for over a year without doing much about it. There is always an excuse and he has been living completely off his parents for a year. All of the time I have been by his side.

Hi there! Okay, so this question is a little lacking with information because there are a lot of things I would need to know in order to give you the best advice. Some questions would be one, was being employed a requirement for the relationship? Two, how old is he? Because if he is in college, like myself, getting some help from your family is not meant to be a negative thing. Family is meant to be a support system at the typical college age. And three, are you guys living together? Because if you are under the same roof more than one person should be pulling the weight. Rent and utilities are a lot to handle for one person. But to answer your question, yes you may be a little selfish. There could be a reason your man does not feel comfortable finding a job. It could be personal reasons. If he was laid off from his previous job he may feel as if he is not good enough to be apart of the work force anymore. And if him not having a job was not a requirement in a relationship, well, you can’t really patronize him for not having one because you guys did not establish those principles. You always have to establish what you can deal with and what you cannot at the beginning of the relationship in order for it to work. Obviously you love him, so continue to push him to achieve for a better lifestyle than using his parents. Also, think about talking to his parents. You could talk to them about creating an intervention for him so that they can persuade him to get a job and become independent again. There are a lot of holes with this question, but I hope that there was something here that could help. Stay positive!

[atribecalledhuman]

What advice can you give on not just disliking, but completely loathing your boyfriend's family? I have come to not only hate them for who they are, but for what they are making him become. To over-simplify this situation, they make life difficult on themselves so they can live off other people who pity them. Now he is reminding me more of his father every day. We have been together for over four years. I am to the point where I feel so sorry for him I can't break up with him. HELP!

First off I want to say I love your vocabulary lol which tells me you are a strong, intelligent woman which is very much needed in this situation. So it sounds to me that your boyfriend has lost sight of who he really is. His family has begun to influence his decision-making and his personality in general. Now since you have been with this man for a long time you probably already knew his family was like this. With that being said, you should never allow others to dictate your relationship. You obviously love him because you have been with him for four years, and that’s a long time. So never allow others to affect your relationship because they’re not dating you nor your boyfriend, it is a union only between you two. Now the subject at hand. You have to remind your boyfriend of who he is. Help him realize who he was when you guys first met, first kissed, first fell in love. But that’s all you can do because this is something he as an individual will have to fix on his own. You cannot change a person, only they can change themselves. So he has to come back to reality that his family does not have control over his life, but he is the one who has control. So what do you do? You have two choices and honestly you can do both at the same time. One, continue to remind him of who is and how he is beginning to change. Do this in a cautious manner because he may become defensive. Or two, give him space. In the end he has no choice but to analyze himself if he really needs to change. If you give him space to think about the person he is and he begins to realize not only how it is hurting you, but it is also hurting himself, he will change. It may take some time, but once he realizes the consequences of his actions and behaviors you will see a difference, especially if he genuinely loves you. I really hope this helps, and please let us know of any changes in your relationship. Stay positive and anything can happen!

[atribecalledhuman]

Pauline Tomlin: A Leap of Faith

By Michelle Norsworthy

Culture & Spirituality

I had the pleasure of getting an interview with Pauline Tomlin (49), an extraordinary woman, mother of three, teacher, and motivator from the city of Leeds in northern England. When she’s not meditating or practicing “hot yoga,” she teaches and likes to cook, write, and read. Not only is Pauline a person of great talent, but she’s also a person of great faith. She’s taking her God-given ability to inspire, uplift, and mentor others and is following the Call to help spread a message of love and empowerment. I hope you all enjoy this interview as much as I did!

Q: What got you started with your blog? Was there a single moment that made you want to inspire others?

A: My life has been a rollercoaster! Some of the things I have come through would lead others either to drugs, suicide or the Loony Bin! Yet I’m here, standing strong and healthy. I say this not for sympathy but to demonstrate how grateful I feel to be in this space, right here right now. I have acquired a deeper understanding of myself and life on my journey and feel that teaching has taught me that I am a listener and naturally a teacher. I have the ability to inspire. I just never realized it though others often told me so.

The divine speaks to us, not through explosive, loud manifestations, but in whispers. This is the title of the book I’m writing, which is, I guess a workshop manual as well as a book: ‘Divine Whispers.’

My children are relatively grown up, and it is time to invest in myself, create the life I dream of and ‘walk the walk.’ Be an example to my children and show them how it’s done. So, I guess there wasn’t one single moment, just the universe in its subtle wisdom directing me towards this point right here and now.

Q: What’s the inspiration behind the name of your blog?

A: I wanted the information I write to be read to be a relaxing, calm environment.

I believe in recharging the batteries and lament the fact that Sunday has been taken over somewhat by commercialism. When I was a child, Sundays were for church (if you were that way inclined) of for pottering. Slowly waking and having a cooked breakfast, a ‘Full English’ instead of wolfing down cereal as you tie your shoes and comb your hair at the same time!

I also wanted the blog to be simply notes to consider. [Things] to get you thinking: hmmmm… something to think about there. To stimulate you living your best life and knowing that you deserve it. Hence “Notes on a Lazy Sunday”.

Q: You mentioned starting your own business. What is it that you want to do exactly?

A: Currently, I’m still teaching, but as I said I leave in a week’s time. There are no savings and no clear idea of how I make this happen, but I’d like to use my life experiences as examples for others to help them get through their challenges; to help them see just how amazing they are and that they can achieve whatever they want in life. I hope to be that example and give practical advice and support so others can do truly live the life they desire.

Q: How do you feel [your workshops and seminars] can help others? What do you feel are the most important lessons [people] can learn from them?

A: I’d hope that my seminars will be a catalyst for change: that the people that attend leave with a new-found sense of their ‘perfect imperfection,’ a greater self-acceptance and self-love.

My dream is to develop seminars that leave people knowing this information and providing tools so that they can go put them into practice and grab that life by the ‘short and curlies!’

Q: Do you feel that your childhood, and the things you’ve experienced, have led you to where you are today?

A: Most definitely…the longer I am on this planet, the more I realise there is a divine plan and experiences are designed to teach us lessons so we become fully realised. Sometimes however we get stuck in certain situations or circumstances and allow these to halt our progress or derail us.

Making the decision to leave the profession I love to pursue a dream I have is, some would say ‘foolish.’ It hasn’t been easy however I need to live authentically and put into practice what I feel I am here to do, as well as ‘leap’ and let the universe provide the ‘net.’

For the full interview, click here. Trust me, you won't be disappointed! (:

[atribecalledhuman]

Latosha Elbert: Reach For Your Dreams

By Alesha Elbert

Family/Relationship Writer   

    Life never pans out the way we want it to go. We go through obstacles and changes daily to shape us into the person we were always meant to be. Going through a storm or a different path that you did not create for yourself can sometimes be a blessing. Here in the heart of Georgia is a woman who has been through many different circumstances where her life has shaped her into achieving greatness, even throughout the many changes of society.

    Latosha Michelle Hunter-Elbert, 39, began her life on the outskirts of Wrightsville, Georgia. Growing up, she wanted to own her own business, but after graduating high school and beginning her freshman year at Augusta State University, she decided to take up nursing. This seemed to be a more realistic field judging how valuable nurses were during this time period. Elbert was also engaged to her high school lover, Wynkanus Elbert, whom she planned to marry their junior year of college. However, during her second semester of college, the pressures of being an adult rushed in when she found herself pregnant. All plans of finishing school and becoming a nurse were put on hold. “Wynk decided he would go to the military and that I would move back with my mother, hence, I had to stop going to school,” Elbert said. Even though it seemed that things were turning for the worst, there were plans ahead for better. “It was fine that I became pregnant because we knew we were going to get married, and Wynk was going to the military to try to make it a little bit easier for us, so it was fine.”

    After the child was born, three months later Elbert and her husband were married and began to travel to many different locations, such as Cuba and New Jersey. With her husband being apart of the military there were hardly any limits to where they could go. When Elbert moved back to Georgia, she received her Certified Nursing Aide (CNA) instead of going back to nursing school.

    When her family became stable, Elbert began to take up Early Childhood Education at Middle Georgia College in Dublin, Georgia. “When having three children, by this time, in the house it was very difficult to go to nursing school again. It took me a couple of years to get my Associate’s degree, but I was able to do it.” The goal was to create a daycare, but in her words, “God works in mysterious ways,” so that dream, too, did not become a reality. However she still has the opportunity to work with young women and children at her current job, Healthy Start. “I am a case manager where I educate pregnant and parenting women about how to take care of themselves, their children, and to be progressive in society,” Elbert said. Throughout her time of being a case manager she finally found her true calling, counseling.

    Elbert felt it was a necessity to go back to school, yet again to enhance her career by taking up Psychology at Liberty University. In our society, it is difficult to have a profitable career with only an Associate’s degree. She knew that it was going to be very challenging to go back to school in her thirties. “I had been out of school for almost twenty years and having to go back was very overwhelming at times, from the math and reading comprehension, it was stressful,” Elbert said.

    With working with young women she found that being a counselor is what was meant for her life. She received her Bachelor’s degree within a year and a half’s time and graduated this past May. She plans to go back to school to receive her Master’s in order to start her new addiction based practice “Resurrection” to help those who are addicts of all types to create a renewing in their lives.

    No matter what the obstacles may be in your life, you must continue to push yourself to achieve all the goals and dreams you may have in place. Life gives you chances to make a difference even if the plan you had did not go the way you wanted it to. “If you want something bad enough you will do what you want to get it. You are never too old to reach your dreams and the purpose God has for your life.” Elbert said. Stay encouraged.

[atribecalledhuman]

The Power In You: A Conversation With Katrina Lewis

The Power In You: A Discussion with Katrina Lewis

By: Alia Lewis

Empowerment Writer

  Remember that electrifying single “Power” by rap duo Snap! If you don’t remember the title, there is one hook in the song that’s sure to revoke the memory. “I’ve got the power, power!” Remember now? This one line garnered attention from all over and propelled the song to become an international #1 hit! But what about the line “I’ve got the power” was so, might I say, powerful? What made that particular song spark a flame in people that other songs just couldn’t do.

Yesterday I interviewed an extraordinary woman who proclaims the mantra “I’ve got the power” daily and lives her life by those exact words. An entrepreneur and event planner, Katrina Lewis understands that her belief in herself and in the power she possess has given her success. Previously working as a travel consultant for corporations such as Coca-Cola and American Express, she has received numerous awards and has won the attention and clientele of many. Currently Lewis is in the event planning business and is the CEO of Ravishing Awesome Weddings and Events (Raw). She’s hear to explain what exactly this inner power is, why the mere mention and acknowledgement of it is so captivating, and what we can accomplish through our inner power.

Ten years ago, Lewis heard a message that completely changed her life. The simple yet dynamic advice given to her by her pastor plainly explained “You’ve got the power.”

This was the first time someone told Lewis that she had control over her own life, over many of the situations that had, were, and are going to occur.

Lewis immediately took that advice and has clung to it ever since.

“At first, I didn’t believe it. I said I don’t have the power.” Said Lewis.

“I grew up in a very dictatorship religion. Do what I say, don’t question. Believe God, because I said it.” Because of her upbringing, Lewis didn’t know she had control over her life.

One day Lewis needed help and she couldn’t call anyone. “My grandmother was gone, aunt was gone, mother was preoccupied. “I had to go to God.” Lewis soon realized that “God wasn’t going to come down and do anything.” “He has given us the power.” Lewis said. She believes we can’t just sit around and wait, but we have to take action.

“The scripture says if you have no joy, then leap for joy.” “If you leap for joy, you have to take actions…. That is my power.” Said Lewis.

“There is always going to be something to worry about, but why not turn that into joy” said Lewis. “I have the power to make it right even if it’s not.”

By believing in herself and channeling her inner power that we all possess, she was able to successfully transition from the travel industry into event planning and start her own company.

Lewis wants everyone to understand that they possess the power to control their life and their success.

“I didn’t want a job at corporate America so I could get laid off.” “We are corporate America. We are the ones that make the economy grow!” Lewis believed that if she had the power to be successful in the corporate world, she could be just as successful starting her own business. “I might have to work harder, but I’m organized and I have it set that I can work from home.” Said Lewis.

Lewis had to continuously tell herself that she could do it, that she could start her own business and be successful. “Once I believed in myself and really became happy, contracts came in.”

Lewis hopes to inspire people that they have the power to change their life and to change their situation.

“The power that we possess is a spirit that leads, guides, and helps us to do what we're supposed to do.” Said Lewis.

She believes when we acknowledge that we have power, we subconsciously start acting on the power and ultimately accomplishing what we desire to accomplish.

Lewis believes you can accomplish anything using your inner power. “The power has no limits.” Said Lewis. She believes whatever you put your mind to and ultimately your actions to, you will accomplish. It’s up to you if you want to make up your mind to do it. You make the decision. You have the power.

Lewis holds the bible verse, Ephesians 3:20 very close to her heart because it is the foundation of her power. Lewis recently started a Facebook page entitled "Power In You" to inspire as many people as she can. She hopes that everyone will realize the power that lies in them so they can accomplish the things they desire.

You can visit Katrina Lewis on her website here.

Have a wonderful weekend.

                                                                                 -Peace, Alia

[atribecalledhuman]

Christal Jefferson: A Miracle in the Storm of Temptation

By Alesha Elbert

Family/Relationship Writer

 trigger warning: molestation, child abuse, drug abuse

    Life is a struggle that each individual goes through daily. We have obstacles that step into our paths consistently, even when we think we are at our best. However, many of us have found comfort in some specific being, whether it is a family member or a spiritual ideology to get us through the hard times that may come our way. This is the Christal Jefferson story.

    Christal Jefferson, 29, is a stay-at-home mother in Dublin, Georgia. However, her childhood began in Thomasville where trials and tribulations came her way. She lost her mother at the age of three and moved around from family member to family member. Finally, she found a stable home with her grandparents, where she grew up for most of her life. Unfortunately, at the age of seven, a family member, who also lived with her grandparents, began molesting her. At an age like that you are learning the difference between right and wrong, so you can imagine this was very difficult for a young girl to understand. However, going into her teenage years these acts progressed. The member continued to pressure her and used other tactics to have easier access to her. One use was by putting Vodka in her Kool-Aid while the grandparents were not home. The only thing she could turn to was her journal. That was her way of releasing the turmoil building inside of her throughout her years of struggle. All until the age of seventeen Jefferson dealt with this battle of molestation, until the truth of the situation was revealed to her father and other family members in her writings.

    At first, Jefferon’s grandmother did not believe her about being violated as a child, so she was kicked out and sent to Southwestern Virginia Mental Health Institute for six months, but even then she felt like she could not truly be open about the situation because of her family’s fear of her being taken away by child services. However, her grandmother told her that she could come back to stay with her if she apologized to the family member for what was said about his behavior. Her response: “I apologize for the way it came out, but the only person that knows the truth is God.” Even though the people she was close to harmed her, she was still strong in the end.

    After graduating from high school and getting herself established, she began hanging around the wrong crowds, people whom she thought were her friends. With the parties and hanging out on the weekends, Jefferson felt no wrong in doing ecstasy or pills, but this led to a stronger drug use, cocaine. “I believe everyone has a “devil” in life. My “devil” was cocaine, ” said Jefferson. The use of this drug consumed her life. “You would rather snort powder than eat. You don’t want to sleep either, only snort powder.” She lost many things, such as cars, houses, and pay checks, all because of her consumption. But she knew through it all, there was better for her.

    Jefferson has been clean for two years now. She attributes three reasons behind her recovery. First, she was staying in a motel for six months, still a slave to cocaine, but one night she had spiritual experience in her room. She could see this black figure surrounding her and felt her heart rate drop. She feels that this was a sign telling her that she was finally about to be consumed to the Devil’s hand. Then, her current boyfriend, Jeffery, took part in her change. He could see so much potential in her to be a better person, but she kept using her past as a crutch to hold onto the drugs. Third, and the biggest inspiration of all, is her son. Finding out she was three months pregnant, immediately eliminated her use. She says God spoke to her and said that if you give me what I want, I will give you what you want, and sure enough, this was her blessing. The doctors told her that what happened in her past would deprive her of having children, but she was able to have her son and, currently, has a little one on the way.

    Her plans for the future are to reach out and counsel young girls who may have the same story as hers when it comes to child molestation and to save them from the dangers that could occur further into their lives when entering their teenage years. She feels that life is too short to waste on temporary things. “It’s not worth it. The high only lasts for so long. Find something that is worth living for,” Jefferson says.

    Through it all we must remember that we are human. Temptation can set into the lives of those who may seem to have their lives together. However, we must find a release and a group of individuals that are willing to care and help you grow in life, not bring you down. Life is too short, so make a difference today.

[atribecalledhuman]

Determined to Excel: The La’Fred Gibbons Story

By: Alia Lewis

Empowerment Writer

              When you think of a poverty stricken teen that has traveled from home to home and attended three different high schools in three different states, all while being abandoned by his father, do you think success?

            La’ Fred Gibbons has broken misconceptions and challenged stereotypes all of his life. A junior majoring in chemical engineering and mathematics, Gibbons knows that if he wants to succeed, he must do it himself.

            Despite his many obstacles, Gibbons focuses on the positive things in life, which has contributed to his success. Currently, an intern at Chrysler Group LLC, Gibbons can remember a time when life wasn’t always golden.

            Because Gibbons was born to a single teenage mother, he experienced many rough predicaments which left his family financially unstable. This resulted in Gibbons learning to take responsibility and becoming “the man of the house” at a very young age.

            Through it all, Gibbons remained positive. “I was always optimistic; I always kept a smile on my face, because I knew things would get better.” Said Gibbons.

           Like he said, things did indeed get better.

          Gibbons focused on school and extracurricular activities, which resulted in him graduating Salutatorian for the class of 2012.

           When asked how he stayed focused and motivated, Gibbons said “I had to make it happen for myself because nobody was going to do it for me. I knew nothing was going to be handed to me.”

          Gibbons hopes to encourage others to continue to move forward.

          “It’s not about how you start, but it’s about how you finish.” “Never underestimate what can happen.” Said Gibbons.

           Currently, Gibbons is working on a book entitled “How I Made it Black and Fatherless”, which details the experiences he had growing up and how he faced them.

          In the future, Gibbons hopes to graduate with a chemical engineering and mathematics degree and eventually start his own business. 

          He wants everyone to dream bigger, aspire to achieve higher things, and excel in whatever they put their mind to.

          “Be ambitious. Don’t just sit around and expect things to happen.” Said Gibbons.

          Gibbons knows his future is bright because he knows who holds his future. He attributes his success to God and all of the people who helped him along the way, including his mother Angelina Bennett and his mentor Brandon Brown.  

          Through his life, Gibbons has proved that hard work pays off. As a Chrysler intern, Gibbons is defining the meaning of success and showing people everywhere that it’s not about how you start, but it’s about how you finish.

[atribecalledhuman]

Hi Authentically Human team! So I have a question since you guys give advice, at least that's what it says in your paragraph thingy at the top lol. So I am in a physical relationship with this guy, but unfortunately, he is in an off and on relationship with this girl. He only calls me when they are off and she just asked me to be her friend on Facebook!!! What should I do?

Hey there. Yes we give advice so you’re in the right place! It looks like you are in a dilemma. With answering your main question, the answer is no. Never befriend the other woman because it will only lead to trouble. You may find yourself one day angry with him and decide to take it to the social media and if she sees that, it’s over. There will be more drama right there! Honestly, sleeping around with this guy is not going to make you happy either. One, because if he is off and on with her, clearly, he can’t leave her alone and he is using you for comfort. That’s not fair. You deserve to have someone of your own, not someone to share. It’s up to you what you decide, but at the end of the day YOUR happiness is what matters the most, so do what will give you what you truly deserve, and that’s pure happiness with someone you love and is worth your time. I hope this helps (: Also, check out some of our posts that will give you advice on how to deal relationships and society’s views on side chicks and loyalty in love.

[atribecalledhuman]

By Michelle Norsworthy

Spirituality/Culture Writer

“When I see someone that came through the program, and then I see them become something, like a nurse, it makes me feel like I’ve reach my goal- like I had a part in helping their dream come true.”

Sha’Mika Jackson, 37, created her summer program nearly seven years ago in Dublin, Georgia’s South Side after the closing of the Boys & Girls Club. Greater Victory Temple Summer Camp, better known as GVT Summer Camp, was named for the church that she grew up attending and that her parents – Pastor Prenis  and First Lady Kathy Edmond – are now over.

Since its inception in 2007, the summer program has grown to include over 60 children with the numbers continuing to grow every year. The summer camp is a non-profit, faith-based organization.

“I wanted to do it because I worked with different kids in middle school and I’d overhear the situations they were in or the choices they made, and I feel like they need somebody to listen to them – somebody they can trust,” Jackson said.

In addition to creating this positive environment, Jackson also invited guest speakers from Women in Need of God’s Service (WINGS) and the Health Department. The speakers held workshops with the girls that attended the camp, as well as female staff members and volunteers.

Part of the reason why Jackson invites organizations and other community helpers – like law enforcement, fire departments, politicians, and EMTs – to speak to the program’s youth is to give them positive role models to guide them.

“There used to be a saying ‘It takes a village to raise a child,’ meaning it shouldn’t just be the mother or father raising the child. Everybody should chip in – as long as they’re doing it in a positive way,” Jackson said.

Sha’Mika Jackson spoke of growing up in Rentz, Georgia as the child of preachers “The rules I didn’t understand from my parents – you know, I thought they were being strict, but they were showing me. They couldn’t protect me from everything, but they taught me how to overcome and handle certain situations.”

These are a few of the lessons Mrs. Jackson, and members of her staff, try to teach the children at the summer camp. In addition to life lessons, campers also learn praise dances, study Bible verses, and work on academic subjects like mathematics, writing, and reading. The kids learn mostly through hands-on activities and field trips, Jackson said, which helps them retain the information while still being fun.

Alongside Jackson is her husband Eric, 36, who often helps out with the program’s young men. Eric Jackson grew up in Dublin and served three years in the military. He incorporates his love of sports with mentoring the young boys and men at the camp. He plays sports like basketball, football, and kickball in order to get the kids outside and keep them active. “It help keeps them out the streets - the one’s that do come - ‘cause a lot of them don’t have father figures. [The sports] teach them discipline.”

The camp is currently accepting applications, and accepts grades Pre-K through 8th grade. For more information, contact Sha’Mika directly through the camp’s Facebook page.

Both Sha’Mika and Eric Jackson hope to see GVT Summer Camp expand to other cities - and one day go national.

(Heyyy)