contrary to popular belief not everyone has an innate sense of internal gender or care to have one or seek a name for it, some people go their whole lives without questioning their occupation in one of two gender roles, but for some people, if pressed, they don’t feel that internal sense of ‘i am a woman’ or ‘i am a man’, and in that case i feel the switch over to transgender vs cisgender relies on active identification of a gender other than the one they were assigned. if someone’s like ‘idk dude I just work here’ then that’s valid
#i would describe my gender as not exactly ‘idk dude i just work here’ #more like…..when someone assumes you work somewhere that you don’t #but you know how to help them so you do it anyway #my gender is wearing a red shirt at a target
A portion of people in the notes are like ‘but that makes you trans. That’s called being agender’ and another portion of people are going ‘this is how the majority of cis ppl feel and it’s NOT agender’ and personally I feel like both of them are missing the point here. Yes a lot of people identify as agender because of this feeling. Yes a lot of people with this same feeling still identify as cis. These are not mutually exclusive experiences and it doesn’t mean the agender people are secretly cis or the cis people are secretly agender. It just means they have very similar experiences of gender that they choose to conceptualize and label differently, and neither of them are mistaken or wrong to do so.
back for another round! please pay attention to the emojis listed below and marked beside each fic, they will serve as a key for this list instead of the headers this time.
this rec includes:
🏅(13) hollanov fics
📣 (3) hollanov threesome fics
🍿(2) hudcon fics
❤️ (4) of my recently posted hr fics
↓ recs below ↓
(these are in no particular order, and feature a range of topics, ratings, lengths, and possible warnings. as with any rec, please be sure to also double check for any triggers yourself before reading. however, I will not rec MCD and very rarely unhappy endings.
if you read one and enjoy it, please be sure to leave a comment or support! if you don't, just move on. be kind!)
🏅 HE TURNS OFF THE BIG LIGHT by gurlsrool
⤷ rating + length: M, 9k
⤷ summary:
Ilya knows firsthand that the world isn’t comfortable. It’s loud, bright, demanding, a harsh place in direct opposition to everything he’s recently learned about autism.
Is it so wrong that he wants Shane to feel safe here? To carve out a space where, even if only for a few hours, he doesn’t have to grin and bear anything? He can just be?
Or: Ilya Rozanov has a lot of good ideas. Telling his fuck buddy that he should consider getting an autism diagnosis isn’t one of them.
⤷ notes + warnings:
ok starting this rec off with one that I just finished recently that I have thought about persistently since I first read it. I have read several perspectives on the shane-autism thing, both in favor of and against the idea of actually pursuing or acknowledging a diagnosis, and I think there are lots of great points on either side. this one, however, combines two of my most favorite hc's: shane navigating the possibility of being autistic, and ilya's hyper vigilance shining through in the ways that he cares for shane. this left me achy in a way that had me 1000% empathizing with shane and 1000% wishing for a partner like ilya. (also, it's gurlsrool, so you can expect fantastic writing regardless.) it fucked me up a little in the best way. so good.
🏅 IT HAD TO BE YOU, WONDERFUL YOU by bannerthyme
⤷ rating + length: E, 29k
⤷ summary:
Shane cups her cheek in his hand, running his thumb over the plush of her bottom lip. She looks at him through her fawnish lashes. He roves his eyes over her body. Her shoulders and biceps, her abs… She's so strong, so…
Incredible.
"I've never done that before," he admits, "Not with... with a woman, at least."
"Right, well," she rolls her eyes, "Would probably be better with a real man, yes?"
He shakes his head, "No. It wouldn't have been the same at all."
[or, Shane comes to terms with his sexuality only to get thrown right back into confusion by Rozanov.]
⤷ notes + warnings:
user bannerthyme I need you to know that I was biting my fist (complimentary) throughout this entire thing. beautiful writing, lovely introspection, and in the wake of fics like dust bowl (rip) this was just amazing to stumble across and then be absolutely floored by. i'm still thinking about it. incredible.
🏅 PROMISE by LunarMoonstone
⤷ rating + length: G, 10k, locked
⤷ summary:
Slowly, the realization of what he is asking him to do sets in.
“Shane,” he croaks, his voice breaking. I can’t hurt you.
“Please.”
Always so pretty when he begs. Even like this, all messed up and bloody. Ilya loves him more than life.
“I don’t want anyone but you touching me."
That finally did it.
During the Boston vs. Montreal game, Marleau doesn't knock Shane out completely but still injures him. While a fight breaks out, Shane begs Ilya to help him, right there on the ice in front of the whole arena. Unfortunately, Ilya could never say no to him.
⤷ notes + warnings:
see notes/tags for injury related warnings! admittedly, I am a sucker for the trope of injured-on-the-ice while the other one tries desperately to toe the line between caring for them and protecting them by not acting too concerned. this one DELIVERS. I don't know that I've read one yet with this specific iteration of the marleau-injury, and it just. ugh. the vulnerability of still being conscious, asking ilya to be the one to help fix it, the tension of people assuming he's going to make things worse and then the quiet surprise when he doesn't. this is like crack to me I don't even know how to describe it you gotta read
🏅 BROKEN GLASS by prinny_a
⤷ rating + length: M, 16k
⤷ summary:
When a visit to his father turns violent, there's only one place Ilya wants to go.
set post-rose breakup and pre-all stars game.
⤷ notes + warnings:
check all tags prior to reading. touches on ilya's relationship with his father, including child abuse and domestic violence (though everyone is okay and this fic is mostly h/c centered).
I'm a hugeeeee fan of this trope for hollanov but it's rare that I've found a fic that handles it in a way that doesn't leave behind a sour taste. I enjoyed the build up in this one, the comfort, ilya's inner monologue and need to get to a safe place (shane), and I'm always a glutton for fics where their need for each other surpasses the ever present threat of being found out. loved it!
🏅 RECKLESS & YOUNG by some1_around
⤷ rating + length: M, 34k
⤷ summary:
A prank-gone-wrong leads to the Boston Bears finding out about Shane and Ilya’s relationship in 2016. The day Ilya first invited Shane into his house. Right after they say each other’s names for the first time. Fuck his life, honestly.
⤷ notes + warnings:
*summary has been shortened, please see the work itself for full synopsis* LOVED this premise, I'm fascinated by fics that explore the dynamic of shane + ilya's boston team, and this one felt realistic in a way that could potentially fit into canon. great work as always from this author!
🏅 bad case of lovin' you by imbihesgay
⤷ rating + length: E, 36k, ongoing wip
⤷ summary:
shane hollander comes into ilya rozanov's ER, two months after they had a wild one-night stand.
⤷ notes + warnings:
*summary has been shortened, please see the work itself for full synopsis* this fic involves detailed mpreg, so be aware if that's not your thing! it is sometimes, however, my thing, and this is a perfect example. the characterization is delicious and thoughtful, and for someone that isn't really a fan of slow burns, this one pulled me in and I was hooked and couldn't put it down. mpreg always requires a dedication to realism (esp with a character like shane, imo) but this world just felt so tangible. I can't wait to read more!
🏅 WAX ON, WAX OFF by ramslambsandwolves
⤷ rating + length: E, 2k
⤷ summary:
Due to a small administrative error, Shane Hollander’s bimonthly wax appointment wasn’t scheduled with his favorite esthetician, Rose, but with Ilya “Rosie” Rozanov.
Things go as smoothly as you’d expect.
⤷ notes + warnings:
delicious premise delicious execution @ramslambsandwolves I am in your walls I'm still at the restaurant (the restaurant is shane's wax appointment) I've been surviving on the wax for days now help please
(seriously though, this was short and sweet but also hot as hell. not enough athlete shane getting waxed fics, I think, and this is the perfect trailblazer. I love when shane's shame is baked into his kink mmmmmmmmm)
🏅 I'VE GOT ONE FOOT IN THE GOLDEN LIFE, ONE IN THE GUTTER by beetlesandstars, kryptonian
⤷ rating + length: E, 6k
⤷ summary:
“You broke up with her,” Ilya says, arms loosening against his chest.
“No, she, uh—” Shane ducks his head, avoiding Ilya’s eyes. “We slept together. And she kind of … she didn’t confront me, I guess. But she talked to me. Kind of hinted that she thought I might not be…”
“Into girls?” Ilya finishes for him.
“Something like that.”
“You denied it?”
“No, I— I told her. About me. About—us,” Shane’s head snaps up, a hand lifted in Ilya’s direction. “Not about us, us. That I’d been sleeping with someone. Another player. I didn’t tell her about you.”
[OR: Shane comes out to Rose and runs toward the safest pair of arms he knows: Ilya’s.]
⤷ notes + warnings:
post-rose canon divergence, emotional hurt/comfort and a healthy dose of smut too. literally what more could you ask for. this was so sweet and so fulfilling for those of us who wanted to shake shane's shoulders a little bit in between breaking up with rose and vegas. #ourshane is NOT wasting time here and I respect it. BUT it also maintains both characterizations so well that it feels true to canon. so good!
🏅 LIKE A VIRGIN by eleadore
⤷ rating + length: E, 4k
⤷ summary:
"You have been playing like this?" Ilya mused. "With this? For how long?"
Hollander's mouth was flat. "Two weeks."
"Wow." Ilya let out a low whistle. "Pussy makes you better at hockey."
⤷ notes + warnings:
just read this one last night and I still feel feral about it. seriously dangerous levels of hot. this author never fails to scald through the screen. it has only one tag, which I feel like sums it up pretty well: Magical Pussy Acquisition.
🏅 SLIP OF THE TONGUE by OpalApparition
⤷ rating + length: E, 5k
⤷ summary:
One accidental word sends Shane spiraling, but Ilya knows exactly what Shane needs—and he’s going to make him ask for it properly.
[or, Shane accidentally calls Ilya Dad and realizes he might have a daddy kink]
⤷ notes + warnings:
where the FUCK is all the daddy kink in this fandom????? if you have been searching like me please stop and make sure you've read this one. it's not a kink that I feel like hollanov would inherently have, so I loveeeee reading the ways that people weave it in. and, as we know, this author is a hell of a weaver. loved it!
🏅 BUT I GUESS WE'LL BOTH JUST HAVE TO BE PATIENT by georgeseuratii
⤷ rating + length: T+, 41k, wip
⤷ summary:
It's Ilya Rozanov's first winter in retirement. He has some time and a heart to fill, the world's best in-laws, and a husband who will let nothing go wrong. Somewhere, there's a little kid that needs them.
Or, Shane and Ilya become foster parents, meet a little girl with spina bifida, and have some adventures in the unfamiliar world of medical foster parenting and (eventually) sled/adaptive hockey.
⤷ notes + warnings:
I can't remember if I've recced this fic here before, but it's definitely got more than it did the last time if I did! I adore this fic and it's become so special to me. zoe is so precious, and as an adoptee myself, any foster or adoption fics hold a special place in my heart. I'm rooting for them so hard <3
🏅 CHANGE YOUR WIN CONDITIONS by Vee (Vera_DragonMuse)
⤷ rating + length: E, 102k
⤷ summary:
Sometimes life came at you with a clenched fist and Ilya had never figured out how to duck.
So here he was, twenty-eight years old, single, dealing with the fallout from injuries given to him by the game he loved, and the second youngest assistant coach in the league to one of the worst teams. Stability was hard to come by, but he was managing.
Then along came Shane Hollander to knock him on his ass, one more time.
⤷ notes + warnings:
this is one I put off for a while because of the length, but I'm so happy I found time to finally read it. I'm not a fan of breakup fics but I do occasionally love a 'getting back together' fic later in life, and this one was right up my alley. (I also have a soft spot for fics where one of them has a career ending injury, and I thought this one handled it in such an interesting and heartfelt way!) beautiful writing.
🏅 FIVE MINUTES FOR SPEARING by hollanov (searchingforabiggersky)
⤷ rating + length: E, 4k
⤷ summary:
Shane foolishly thought that Ilya had forgotten about their mutual agreement to try out sounding.
Luckily for both of them; Ilya never stopped thinking about it.
⤷ notes + warnings:
cw: sounding (kink). freak4freak comes out to play once more *rubs hands together* this one was SO GOOD! if you enjoy sounding in fics, this is the first one I've read for hollanov and I was NOT disappointed. delicious dom Ilya and delightfully obscene and desperate shane. a win all the way around.
📣 SEEING DOUBLE by solarspunk
⤷ rating + length: E, 3k
⤷ summary:
“You want to know how it feels?” Ilya said, eyes looking behind him to where Rozanov was licking at his ears, making long, slow strokes with his cock,“To have both your holes stuffed with my cum?”
[Shane walks into Rozanov's Vegas penthouse after MLH award in 2014 and sees two Ilya Rozanovs.]
⤷ notes + warnings:
ok ok ok FUCK! so this one made me a little insane. I always find it a little hard to get into the doppelgänger / body double kink thing sometimes but like. this was brilliant because it was the ilya we see in vegas paired with an older, more confident, very much unabashedly in love with shane version. so not only do we get the tension between the ilya's because of 2014's vehement denial of his feelings, but we also get to see a 2014 affection-shy shane get to experience what the full scope of ilya's love is like -- AND THEN!! and then we get to see 2014 shane inevitably still stray toward 2014 ilya despite it all, because these two freak losers are soul bonded or some shit, even when the competition is themselves. ugh. what the fuck. please read this now.
📣 CROSSFIRE by makemegentle
⤷ rating + length: E, 9k
⤷ summary:
“What did she look like?” asked Hollander.
“She was brunette,” said Ilya. Marleau’s eyes trailed along the hard lines of his traps, past the glint of his crucifix, the swells of his pectorals, towards the trail of hair disappearing into his shorts. They landed on the thickening outline of his cock. “Pretty little thing, with freckles. Big, brown dumb eyes, begging to be made to cry.”
Hollander’s breath hitched. Marleau realized, perhaps belatedly, that this was a game in which truth was incidental.
[In 2014, Ilya and Marleau went to Paris on a girl to celebrate the Stanley Cup win. Ten years later, on a balmy evening spent in the Hollander-Rozanov Ottawa home, Marleau reminisces and, courtesy of Shane and Ilya, re-enacts.
It’s just a game of play pretend.]
⤷ notes + warnings:
this fic literally burned me. scorched my retinas. hot damn. I did not know that marleau x hollanov would be something I needed to experience, but this framing is ridiculously hot and pushes the limits of their characterizations in a way that still feels like them but also is so unexpected I was sweating a little. still very much hollanov endgame, but if you're someone who's dabbled in the hayden voyeurism / shane curious fics, I feel like this is somewhere in the same stratosphere.
📣 LET'S MAKE A TEAM (MAKE 'EM SAY MY NAME) by nettlepixie
⤷ rating + length: E, 14k
⤷ summary:
Breaking my silence to say that I think Hollanov would have a threesome and they'd have it with Luca Haas. But don't worry, they're obviously jealous and possessive and insane about it the whole time.
⤷ notes + warnings:
*summary has been shortened for this post* I fucking love fics where shane is angry about what turns him on and takes it out on everyone around him. usually that's ilya, but this time it's luca too, and oh boy is it glorious.
🍿 FEEL LIKE I'M WEIGHTLESS, I'VE LOST GRAVITY by anonymous
⤷ rating + length: E, 4k
⤷ summary:
The promise of seeing him on that stage, of seeing him, makes everything else fall away. They've talked a lot, publicly and privately, about keeping a professional distance, allowing themselves to have their own careers, about keeping things for themselves. This will probably cause a shit storm on social media, but Hudson doesn't fucking care—this is the one thing he can't afford to skip, to not allow himself to be a part of. And Connor asked him, even before Hudson could suggest it himself.
Of course he said yes. Of course he'd bend the rules for him, whatever he asked, whatever he wanted. Connor deserves the world, a million times over, and Hudson is going to help him get it.
[Hudson goes to SNL for his baby. A reunion, a show. and time together well spent and well-loved.]
⤷ notes + warnings:
hudcon in general feels like crack to me but anything along the lines of fluff? comfort? intimacy? and of course the smut???? I've been plugged into an electrical socket hello
🍿 WHAT'S THIS THING BETWEEN YOU AND ME (BEEN BREWING FOR A WHILE) by hazmesentir
⤷ rating + length: E, 5k
⤷ summary:
“Good night, then?” Hudson says. “Your ten-minute date better than Newport Beach guy?”
Connor smiles. He’s so beautiful. Hudson would literally tear his own skin off to make him happy. “Oh, yeah. No-one cried, not even me, so that’s a win.”
[Connor's single. Hudson is not. They're just really normal friends about it.]
⤷ notes + warnings:
I felt insane reading this (complimentary) it was a fever dream from start to finish this is such a distinct style of hudcon that scratches a very specific itch in my brain. they're such a mess here and unfortunately it's as endearing as it is annoying and also very hot, so. the writing is gorgeousssss too, which never hurts. really good!
❤️ REFUGE
⤷ rating + length: M, 2k
⤷ summary:
At the 2014 MLH Awards, an emergency lockdown traps them together after Ilya follows Shane into the bathroom. Ilya thinks about survival, guilt, and family.
It's all grief, really. Even the wanting. Always has been.
⤷ tags + warnings:
emergency lockdowns, emotional hurt/comfort
❤️ APPLEJACK
⤷ rating + length: E, 6k
⤷ summary:
“I wasn’t a fan of that drink, by the way,” Shane tells him absently, bending to slip the last plate into the dishwasher.
“What drink,” Ilya says.
“It was the one you left in the gym. I told you I was going to workout while you were gone, I figured you put it there when you were finished before you left.”
Ilya frowns. “Shane. I did not leave a drink for you.”
Somewhat exasperatedly, Shane sets the machine to go and then reaches for the hand towel, dries his palms as he leans against the counter opposite him. “It was the green bottle. That’s the one you always use for that stuff.”
“The green bottle,” Ilya echoes slowly, thick brows furrowed. “Where was it?”
“Between the treadmills. On the mat.”
The memory slams into Ilya like a check to the boards.
“Oh,” he says plainly. And then, distinctly more intrigued the second time, “Oh.”
⤷ tags + warnings:
entry for mean dom ilya week, watersports, kink exploration
❤️ ROOM RULES
⤷ rating + length: M, 5k
⤷ summary:
Barred from his own locker room after a game against Boston, Shane shows up to the Bears room instead, hoping for refuge.
He gets that and more.
⤷ tags + warnings:
omegaverse, beta shane & alpha ilya, boston bears, hurt/comfort
❤️ ORAL SUPPORT
⤷ rating + length: M, 8k
⤷ summary:
At a routine dental check up, Dr. Scott Hunter thinks the bruising in Shane Hollander’s throat is most likely some kind of eating disorder.
Ilya would place his bets elsewhere.
⤷ tags + warnings:
au, dental assistant ilya / hockey player shane, crack, getting together
that's all for this one! see you all for the next one! x
From Harrison’s version of “All The Things She Said” at the heartbreaking club scene, to Wolf Parade’s “I’ll Believe in Anything” at the Skip kiss, Heated Rivalry has brought us so many needle drop moments. Just like many other aspects of the show, the soundtrack helps tell the story of Shane and Ilya.
This deep dive is written in collaboration with u/SoftSeagulls on Reddit. A big thank you to their incredible research and for allowing me to adapt their original Reddit post 🫶🏼
These insufferable buff men have me hooked. I've been tearing through fic like an insane person, staying up till 2am and neglecting my life duties in pursuit of that sweet hockey porn. Enjoy this curated list, I like my men to be suffering, in love, and horny. All of these fics are explicit because thats the way I roll.
This is a general list of bangers that I am obsessed with so far, but I think I will be doing a Part 2 of BDSM recs!
advice from fools
After Sochi, Shane starts sleeping with another man. After Vegas, he picks back up with Ilya, too.
Notes: This fic really destroyed me. It has Shane/OMC but I promise you Shane is thinking of Ilya the whole time. It kind of ripped my heart out, stomped on it, and then put it back together.
Ripe by @saltandbyrne
Ilya spits, and Ilya swallows.
Notes: Ahhhhh!!!!! Ok, so I have followed this author through the SPN fandom, and everything they write is A+. I jumped up and down when I was reading this, holy shit. So hot and sexy and visceral its truly one of a kind.
Sleepover by @ladybundle
Shane is starting to get the impression that when he asked him to stay, he meant the whole night. But Shane doesn’t have a toothbrush. An alternate look at the tuna melt scene and beyond.
Notes: So hot, so tender, so cute. Shane is so soft and Ilya knows him so well. Reading this is just like a cozy read with some emotional damage on the side.
slash and burn by @eleadore
Shane had everything he'd ever wanted, plus a girlfriend. Ilya Rozanov was not his problem.
Notes: Fun fact about me: One Direction is my fandom roots (I am not new to RPF). I have been following eleadore's writing for 10+ years, and they never disappoint. This might be my favorite HR fic so far! Amazing dialogue, unique premise. It takes you through all the emotions: excited, turned on, sad... I wish I could read it for the first time again!
Haunting Your City by mightydolphin
Ilya gets traded to Montreal in October 2014. He's lonely, and angry, and he misses Boston. He doesn't know if it helps that Hollander is there or not.
Notes: Look, a fic that isn't 90% porn! (Please be proud of me) Great writing that keeps me hooked. Love Ilya's POV.
I. ONE LITTLE GOD FALLING OVER ANOTHER by @yiiiiiiiikes25
Lily, 9:19 a.m.
i mean they were right just early. we hadnt won our cups yet but yes cocksucking faggots took over the major.
Ilya knows what he wants; he can wait out a year.
Notes: I'm so obsessed with this fic! Pulls in the disturbing themes of hazing and sexual assault that happens in the hockey world (consider this a content warning). Not only have I enjoyed the story but I've learned a lot. Such a unique and interesting way of storytelling that pulls you in. Check out the Appendix chapter.
Good Losing by @rozzed
“Happy winner,” Rozanov says, kissing Shane’s hip. “How does it feel? Good, yes? Such a strong alpha.” Despite the teasing lilt, a soft, rolling r in strong, Shane can tell that Rozanov is being sincere. He has never gotten the impression that Rozanov uses it as an insult with him—unlike every time he whips it out mid-game to taunt an opponent, or to provoke someone in an interview. Shane blinks down at him, and is reminded of what this is. Of why, in every way, they are implausible Rozanov adds, “What?” “You just never call me that,” Shane says. His grip on Rozanov’s shoulder tightens.
Notes: I read this fic like a mad man on a bender. Some real Alpha 4 Alpha smut, which I had never read before! Love the ideas on power dynamics and how Shane wants to be treated.
it's like you never had wings by @creamsiclemelt
No, Ilya isn’t a martyr, but he isn’t selfish either. Tonight he wants to be selfish. Ilya wants to use Shane. He wants to use his willingness, his body, his everything to make himself feel better. It’s a truth. Maybe an ugly one, but one that he owes to both himself and to Shane to accept. Tonight will be about him. And Shane, for his part, is a willing participant in it all. ‘I want to be useful,’ he had said.
Notes: Good ol' fashioned dom/sub and orgasm denial! So, so hot and nails their dynamic perfectly. Ilya is such a mean nice dom.
Geryone by @agoodsoldier
Ilya is a young man in America. Here he is in the off hours.
Notes: Beautiful vignettes of Shane and Ilya together, and Ilya is a Consent King. 🖤
me, in shapes to make you pleased by eternalbrook
“Oh, so is my fault I am big strong top with giant Russian dick and all little bitch boys want to bend over for me? No one cares about my prostate?" They fuck around. Then they find out.
Notes: Ok, this fic is very near and dear to me! Dom Ilya is my jam, and having him flip the script on Shane is so much fun. There's a scene in here where Shane is about to get fucked, and then when Ilya proposes something he becomes the *shocked Pikachu* meme.
like one of your girls by @creamsiclemelt
Rozanov posts on Instagram a lot. Not on his feed, but his stories. Every time he lands in a city, he posts a story. Usually it's just back of his seat, or sometimes the view out the window—on the tarmac, never anything exciting, one of just many cities their lives are broken up into—and a location tag. Low effort. It’s pretty obvious what it is. Guys laugh about it, call it Rozanov’s Fuck Signal. The easiest way to get the hot girls who follow him to slide into his DMs. Easy pussy.
Notes: I'm pretty sure most of you have read this one because its a certified banger, but in case not, here it is. Ugh, Shane bottling up all his emotions and tracking every move Ilya makes is torture! At least it always pays off for him...
and i want what i want by @ahotknife
“Hollander. Relax. So you lost one game,” Ilya said. “Big deal. Win next time.” “It is a big deal,” Shane said. His hands were clenched tightly into fists. “It’s not just the game. You know I can’t afford to fuck up like this, not this close to playoffs. It’s a pretty big deal. Fuck. And it’s my fault. I wasn’t focused. I can play better than that, and I just… didn’t.” “Okay, your fault, so what?” Ilya shrugged. “You think you should be punished for this?”
Notes: Daddy Dom Ilya knows how to take care of business. Featuring Shane's self-hatred complex. And spanking.
Lavender by @iffervescent
Shane goes for a massage.
Notes: A stuttering, unsure Shane is confronted with master masseuse Ilya and its delicious. Best use of the tag Magic Healing Cock for real.
hello and welcome to my hollanov fic rec list! not only is it extensive, it’s also overly detailed—like shane, i exhibit various undiagnosed autistic tendencies and therefore have a need to organize things in a way that only i truly understand lmao. in order to keep it all in one place, i’m putting everything under a read more so that i can add to it whenever i want! this is my roman empire.
all fics listed below are complete, though some may be part of a series that the author could potentially add to in the future. i’ve organized this list into three categories: canon-compliant/adjacent, canon-divergent, and alternate universe (fics are ordered from longest to shortest per each section). also, each category comes with a little descriptor, mainly just to loosely define what i consider canon-adjacent vs. canon-divergent, etc. lastly, i’ve included some tags underneath every fic for context, such as pov, timeline, and content warnings—however, these tags are not exhaustive; i’m really only tagging things in order to differentiate between fics in my mind. for example, i’m not going to be tagging homophobia/internalized homophobia, the reality of inherent racism in predominantly white sports, or shane’s autism (diagnosed or otherwise), because that should just be implied lmao. we all watched and/or read the same story.
[notes: this category might better be described as canon-compliant + canon-adjacent. for me, this includes fics that either fit right into canon with little-to-no adjustments, or fics with very minor diversions from canon in terms of timeline/plot beats/etc. that don’t really alter the trajectory of the story. if a fic takes place during hr/s1: as long as the story will still conceivably lead to the cottage and all that entails, it’s part of this category. if a fic takes place after hr/s1 (in the period before tlg): as long as the story will eventually lead into tlg with no major changes, i’ve included it here. lastly, i consider any fic which takes place after tlg to be canon compliant, considering unrivaled is not yet out. until it is, post-tlg canon is our sandbox!]
“Your team psychologist prescribed these to you?” Shane asks.
“No. He sent me to another.”
“And you went?”
“I went.”
“For what?” Shane asks, even more confused about this whole thing than he was before. It’s feigning ignorance, maybe. Maybe because he doesn’t want this to be happening, maybe because he wants Ilya to just tell him himself, without Shane having to guess and infer.
“They looked for CTE. Put my head in the machine. They found nothing. They say maybe it’s genetic. So they gave me this.”
“They put your head in a fucking machine? When? What?”
“I said there was nothing.”
“I just... I don’t understand why you wouldn’t tell me any of this, after all this time. I was right here—”
“You don’t want depressed fucking loser, okay? No one does.”
Shane Hollander is worried about everyone and everything. Ilya Rozanov is mostly just sick of air travel. (Or: Shane and Ilya are having trouble balancing their very private relationship and their very public lives.)
✧₊⊹ like a bright new dream ‘series by moonsock – explicit / 39.3k
# shane pov, post-tlg, slice-of-life, honeymoon, the ottawa centaurs ensemble, depression, jealousy, unprotected sex.
“It’s been a hard year.”
A good year, undoubtedly—he got married, honeymooned, joined the same team as his husband. And beating Montreal is… God, it’s the best fucking ‘I told you so’ there is. But also—he’d thought he was going to retire there. He used to picture his jersey in the rafters.
Shane and Ilya’s life after The Long Game, through Shane’s eyes.
✧₊⊹ continuity errors/tuesday again by anonymous – mature / 32.9k
# ilya pov, post-finale, pre-tlg, slice-of-life, depression, miscommunication, metaphorical time loops.
It’s not depression, because he remembers what depression looks like. He remembers his mother’s smiles and the way the edges of them were always a little sad. He remembers the way her body looked in her bed before it became her deathbed, when she’d retire there eary in the afternoon and stay there beneath the covers through the night. He remembers her hair dulling, falling out in long strands he’d find on the pillowcase, in the hallway—the way it lost its shine, turned from spun gold into something mousy and pale.
His hair is still soft, clean, and curly. Golden. Shane likes running his fingers through it, likes pushing it out of Ilya’s eyes and tucking it behind his ears even though it’s short enough that it never stays there for long.
The point is that whatever has broken within Ilya is not depression, because he knows what that looks like. He knows all the warning signs or symptoms or whatever they’re called.
This is not that. This is just—Tuesday, over and over and over and over again.
The first thing you should know about time loops is that they’re really fucking hard to break. The second thing is that you can never break one in such a way that it is incapable of returning.
✧₊⊹ slash and burn by eleadore – explicit / 29.6k
# shane pov, hook-up era, episode: 1x04, unknown drugs, dubious consent, jealousy, infidelity (not between shane/ilya).
He didn’t look right. Rozanov’s tendency to lock on Shane was the worst thing about him, hands down, but his eyes slid right past Shane now, unfocused. Shane found himself cataloguing the rest as if he had Rozanov on a slide: his lax mouth and set of his shoulders, how fast he was breathing. No way to know in this light if he’d paled, but he was shiny with sweat, so much that curls had matted to his forehead and the nape of his neck, and the hollow there of his clavicle gleamed. Was his chest flushed? Shane couldn’t tell. Everything was bright fucking pink.
Rozanov was grinding against the guy’s hip with sloppy, urgent rolls of his body. He was still looking at Shane.
Shane had everything he’d ever wanted, plus a girlfriend. Ilya Rozanov was not his problem.
✧₊⊹ tongues a-wagging by anonymous – teen / 29k
# dual pov, outsider pov (epilogue), hook-up era, original side character, social media, jealousy, miscommunication.
Shane’s never been straightforward with his emotions, his preferences. Ilya’s just spent many, many years learning them. Paying attention. So when a stranger sneaks into the peripherals of Shane’s texts, Ilya notices. When the I’s become we’s, Ilya notices. When Ilya gets a text from Jane in the evening on the West coast, asking if it’s true that in Russia, you don’t cross your heart when you tell the truth, you promise to give someone a tooth, Ilya fucking notices.
Dovonchezky is everywhere in Shane’s life, insidious and unshakable, and Ilya would cut off his own hands if it meant he could stop keeping score on his fingers.
Barstool Sports Canada reports that Montreal Metros captain Shane Hollander has started learning Russian from new teammate and Russian rookie Sergei Dovonchezky. Ilya has some thoughts. None of them are particularly kind.
✧₊⊹ bull in the heather by garagepaperback – explicit / 28.3k
# shane pov, hook-up era, post-tlg, gambling (kind of), texting, jealousy, miscommunication, unprotected sex, original child character (epilogue).
Shane tells himself: it’s a few hundred bucks. Shane tells himself later that it’s fine because he only does it the one time, and unlike the other thing he’s told himself that about, over and over and over—unlike that, it is actually just the one time. Mostly.
Really, he was fucked the second he opened the text thread. He’s not great at self-preservation when his dick is hard, and he gets a little thicker just from the shape of Rozanov’s not-even-real name on his phone.
Shane never had any vices until he met Ilya Rozanov.
✧₊⊹ careful all the time by anonymous – mature / 24.4k
# shane pov, brief svetlana pov, post-finale, pre-tlg, slice-of-life.
“I was thinking about the honeymoon phase thing.”
“Yes?” Ilya said.
“I think it’s different for us. I don’t want us to be all blissful and then only start fighting when we’re back to barely seeing each other. I think it’s good if we figure things out now, when we have the time. Whatever needs figuring out. So we have a solid foundation going into the season. Sort of like training camp.”
“So this means you will keep getting mad at me for things,” Ilya said.
Shane smiled, rolled his eyes. “Yeah, exactly,” he said.
“Good, I find it very hot,” Ilya said, and kissed him.
An insecure over-thinker and a self-destructive thrill-seeker walk into a relationship.
✧₊⊹ for a split sec, i was a train wreck by anonymous – explicit / 18.9k
# ilya pov, hook-up era, injuries, boredom, texting, phone sex.
Never mind the next two weeks, the next eight hours stretched endlessly in front of him. He had no idea how to occupy his time. His house was basically empty, which sounded sad but was really a good thing, evidence he’d built himself the life he wanted—where he always had something to do, outside and with other people. Ilya had been restless for as long as he could remember, had never been able to sit still. He’d gotten in trouble for it as a kid at the dinner table and he got in trouble for it as a full grown man on the team bus. He’d gotten in trouble for it when the doctors had been trying to take the x-ray, his leg jumping without his permission.
Ilya gets injured, stops leaving the house, loses his mind, learns to read tarot, and sends Shane Hollander a lot of photos.
✧₊⊹ free rein by eleadore – explicit / 18.3k
# ilya pov, hook-up era, under-negotiated kink, consensual non-consent, feminization.
“Stop asking me if it’s okay. If I want it. You’re always, like—whatever. I’m not one of your fucking girls, okay? If I don’t like it, I’ll stop you. I can make you stop.”
Ilya dutifully navigating the steel-trap of Shane’s mind.
✧₊⊹ another uninnocent, elegant fall by anonymous – explicit / 17k
# ilya pov, hook-up era, post-finale, mentions of ilya/others, public sex, getting caught, blackmail.
“We shouldn’t talk about that. About anyone knowing. Please.”
“Okay,” Ilya said. He wasn’t sure it scared him the way it scared Shane, the idea of people knowing, and that made him feel guilty and a little ashamed. It should scare him. Logically. He had as much to lose as Shane—probably more, considering the Russia of it all. And he obviously didn’t want it to get out, but he wasn’t scared of it to the degree he couldn’t even entertain it as dirty talk. Ilya wondered what it’d be like moving through life with that much fear in him. He thought maybe it would be nicer. Clarifying.
Seven scandals in the life of Ilya Rozanov.
✧₊⊹ real love makes your lungs black by anonymous – explicit / 16.6k
# dual pov, hook-up era, post-finale, addiction, smoking, jealousy.
If Shane had had a good, close friend, a confidante, somebody he could talk to about whatever was happening between him and Ilya Rozanov, and that good close friend got it in their head that maybe Shane liked Ilya, had feelings for him, one of the first things Shane would say to refute it would be: but he smokes.
Shane, Ilya, cigarettes—a love triangle for the ages.
“Drink,” says Ilya. His tone is light, but it’s firm. It’s not a suggestion.
Shane lifts the glass to his lips and takes a sip.
“All of it,” Ilya says. The fingers of his left hand, resting lightly on the edge of the counter, are beginning to drum against the marble.
Shane takes one gulp, and then another. He drinks steadily, until the glass is empty. Then he sets it down on the counter, breathing harder now, and stares at Ilya.
Ilya’s fingers are still tapping that same steady beat on the counter. He says, “You listen when I tell you what to do.”
Shane swallows. His mouth is still wet. It seems entirely pointless to deny it. “Yes.”
Shane finds getting himself off boring. At least, he used to. Before Ilya Rozanov got involved.
✧₊⊹ and i want what i want by thesehands – explicit / 14.2k
# ilya pov, hook-up era, under-negotiated kink, pain play, spanking, shower sex.
“Hollander. Relax. So you lost one game,” Ilya said. “Big deal. Win next time.”
“It is a big deal,” Shane said. His hands were clenched tightly into fists. “It’s not just the game. You know I can’t afford to fuck up like this, not this close to playoffs. It’s a pretty big deal. Fuck. And it’s my fault. I wasn’t focused. I can play better than that, and I just… didn’t.”
“Okay, your fault, so what?” Ilya shrugged. “You think you should be punished for this?”
Shane plays badly. Ilya thinks he can beat the guilt out of him.
✧₊⊹ this ache of mine by owshampooinmyeyes – mature / 13.5k
# ilya pov, hook-up era, post-finale, childhood flashbacks, brief ilya/svetlana, depression, grief, homesickness.
“Do I dream?” Hollander repeats. When Ilya nods, he says, “Yes? Why?” His eyebrows bunch together. “Wait, you’re not—do you mean in like, a sex way?”
“No,” Ilya says, watching that flush spread. “But I like your idea better. What do I do in these dreams?”
Choking, Hollander says, “Fuck off.”
He is his mother’s son.
✧₊⊹ and he spoke the bridegroom fair by laundry (lovesjar) – explicit / 12.5k
# shane pov, hook-up era, shane’s ambiguous eating disorder (brief mention), marriage roleplay, feminization, unprotected sex, semi-public sex, car sex.
The world did not work like this, with him under Rozanov, with Rozanov fucking him for the first time in his life and then again and again and again. It did not work like hiding his whole life, the important parts of it, from his parents. But also, it did. And fuck if Shane was going to give it all up because he was scared.
‘Do you want something,’ Ilya had asked. The answer was, as it always was, yes. But that had not been the question.
Shame and Desire—the Shane Hollander thesis.
✧₊⊹ stickhandling by moonlitgarden – explicit / 11.9k
# shane pov, hook-up era, body image issues, phone sex.
Women flock to Rozanov; he’s the gravitational centre in every room. Shane gets it. He’s felt it, the shark pull of his orbit. He’s been swallowed up into the belly of desire. What he doesn’t get is how easy it is for Rozanov. Even with Shane’s teammates pooled around him on the dance floor, his hands get clammy when a girl in a sequined skirt makes a move on him. Shane used to think maybe he was just awkward; maybe he needed a couple of beers in him to loosen up, but he couldn’t do that during the season.
Then Ilya Rozanov kissed him and the craving was so clear in Shane’s mind he was able to visualise every sharp edge of it, and he knew he wanted to be on his knees.
2013. It’s been two years since he and Rozanov hooked up in Nashville and exchanged phone numbers. It’s a month till Boston comes to Montreal and Rozanov’s promise of ‘next time’ could go into fulfilment. Shane Hollander wants to play hockey. He wants to play it well. The other thing is a thing he cannot allow himself to want.
✧₊⊹ oh, the lips that tell me lies and i can’t wait to kiss by jewelledfoxes – explicit / 10.6k
# ilya pov, post-finale, pre-tlg, under-negotiated kink, mildly dubious consent, unprotected sex, light feminization.
His mouth parts. A hint of his soft, wet tongue as it swipes briefly across his lower lip. A second passes. A hesitation. Then, “You’ll make a mess.”
Ilya has learned that when it comes to Shane, sometimes “no” really just means “convince me.”
✧₊⊹ the night shift by thecouchsofa – explicit / 10.4k
# ilya pov, hook-up era, under-negotiated kink, cock-warming, orgasm control.
Hollander is always a bit like that, in increments. He takes every loss personally—every missed shot, every empty netter, every failed pass. He could stand to get out of his head for a while.
It would be good, Ilya thinks, for him to calm down.
To sit and relax, maybe.
Montreal loses to Boston. Ilya manages to get Shane out of his own head for a while.
✧₊⊹ i was raised out in the cold by lavenderprose – explicit / 10k
# shane pov, hook-up era, long-distance booty calls, semi-public sex, car sex, getting caught (kind of), panic attacks.
He crowds Shane into the hood of the car, hands up under his shirt and jacket again. October is getting cold; nights are getting colder. The places where Ilya is touching him are the only parts of Shane’s body that are warm right now. Maybe that’s why he wraps his arms around Ilya’s neck and clings to him, though he doesn’t necessarily surprise himself with it. They don’t even kiss for a moment. Ilya busies himself breathing into the crook of Shane’s neck, trying to regain control. Shane opens his eyes and gazes over Ilya’s shoulder at the dark field and realizes that an utterly foreign feeling has risen up in him. It’s Ilya’s broad shoulders and beautiful hair between Shane and the world and he feels—small. Protected.
“Oh my God,” Shane whispers, completely ashamed of the feeling and hungry for it. It curls warm in his stomach. His toes arch inside his shoes. Something about being so close to this man, something about Ilya putting himself between Shane and—the world. Whatever lurks in the deep night. It’s a feeling like a ghost, something that Shane isn’t allowed to look directly at except for moments like these. Quiet and dark.
Shane, Ilya, Vermont. Meeting in the middle.
✧₊⊹ cottaging by gone_girl – explicit / 9.7k
# ilya pov, post-finale, pre-tlg, working out together, under-negotiated kink, orgasm control, light feminization, unprotected sex.
Ilya loved to watch Shane do yoga. Ilya loved watching Shane do anything in the gym. He loved to watch him in the gym and on the ice and during sex, because these were the only times that Shane ever appeared genuinely comfortable in his body. It used to practically get him drunk, watching the tension start to melt from Shane with a single word from Ilya. It made his stomach hurt and his dick twitch, after, watching Shane knit back up tight again when they were done.
Ilya was good at noticing things about people, and he was good at understanding them. Shane was not. That was okay. Shane had developed his own way of getting to know Ilya. It involved a lot of inane questions and, more importantly, no longer involved condoms.
“If you don’t come here, I will come to you.”
“Rozanov.”
“I will drive,” Ilya tells him without sympathy. “Park illegally in my big muscle car. Everyone will notice. Lots of photos, probably.”
Shane rubs his forehead. He gets to his feet and glances at his bag, still packed, on the hotel dresser.
“I hate your car,” he says, at last.
“Yes, I know,” Ilya says. It sounds like he’s smiling.
The excruciating ordeal of asking for what you want.
✧₊⊹ drop the gloves by mcshrug – explicit / 8.4k
# shane pov, hook-up era, on-ice fighting, under-negotiated kink, pain play, unprotected sex.
Jesus, the smell of him. Something about it makes Shane’s thoughts grind to a halt. It makes him feel less like someone who just lost the biggest game of his career and more like an animal, wanting to bite into the meat of Rozanov, wanting to fuck against the warm bulk of him until he comes and comes and comes.
Shane has been trying to figure out how to ask Ilya to stop using condoms. He finally works up the courage the night Boston eliminates Montreal from the playoffs.
✧₊⊹ magnetic fields by thecouchsofa – explicit / 8.3k
# shane pov, hook-up era, under-negotiated kink, multiple orgasms, overstimulation.
‘How many times can you come in an hour?’
Shane doesn’t know. But he’s happy to test it.
Shane and Ilya conducting very serious experiments.
✧₊⊹ tape to tape by mcshrug – explicit / 8.2k
# ilya pov, hook-up era, original side character, jealousy, injuries, marking, hickeys.
He manages to make himself relax enough to loosen his jaw, but not enough to stop himself from saying, “Are you happy?”
Shane hesitates. Ilya hates the way Shane so visibly thinks through what he’s going to say before he says it to Ilya, sometimes, like he’s trying to figure out how best to tiptoe around a subject without hurting Ilya’s feelings.
Ilya knows it’s his own fault, for not being able to handle heavier steps.
Shane Hollander has chemistry with his new American linemate. Montreal fans are thrilled. Ilya Rozanov is not.
The Raiders beat the Sharks 6-1 and Rozanov gets three points and the first star of the game and there’s no text waiting for Shane about how Shane should be planning the way he’s gonna reward Rozanov the next time they see each other.
It’s fine. It’s only been a week—nine days—and it’s not like they were frequent texters before. Rozanov was always the one to initiate their exchanges, so Shane is doing well to follow his lead and not be like that girl who hooked up with J.J. and couldn’t catch a hint afterwards, increasingly desperate texts being passed around the Metros locker room until finally someone suggested he block the crazy bitch.
Shane processes his first time with Rozanov.
✧₊⊹ heaven can wait by garagepaperback – explicit / 7.7k
# shane pov, hook-up era, jealousy, tattoos, injuries, unprotected sex.
The tattoo is so big. Shane doesn’t know if he likes it or not, is only just beginning to understand that this means forever.
Yearning with your eyes fully squeezed shut.
✧₊⊹ running down the hills by hockeyfinches – explicit / 7.1k
# ilya pov, hook-up era, injuries, wound care, erectile dysfunction (due to alcohol).
“You are…” Ilya licked his bloodied teeth and tried to remember the word. “Squeamish?”
“No,” Hollander said. His eyes were still so wide, tracing over Ilya’s bruised face like searchlights. “Fuck. Just—”
He stepped back, stumbling a little on socked feet, and jerked his head at the doorway. Get in.
Lovesickness is real and Ilya has it. (Or: the Tuna Melt Prologue.)
Ilya definitely went through more trouble to fuck Shane than he did most other hook-ups, and going back to the same person over and over wasn’t his usual approach, information Shane had deduced and latched onto from some fucked out pillow talk six months prior. It was an impossibly low bar, but among Ilya’s sexual partners maybe Shane was special. And Shane didn’t want to try to put a number on how many people had slept with Ilya, but there had to be hundreds if not thousands more who had wanted to, who had imagined it but would never get to have it, would never know what it was like, and by this impossibly low bar Shane was special too.
Ilya fucks a girl in a Hollander jersey. Word gets back to Shane.
✧₊⊹ yes, i come back ‘series by naokime – explicit / 6.2k
# dual pov, hook-up era, body image issues, under-negotiated kink, pain play, face-slapping.
His body is good for two things: hockey and sex—even then, the latter comes with an asterisk. He’s good at being available for sex, he supposes, and that is a thought he cannot afford to entertain.
Shane versus his body.
✧₊⊹ like one of your girls by creamsicle_melt – explicit / 5.7k
# shane pov, hook-up era, post-finale, jealousy, under-negotiated kink, feminization.
Rozanov posts on Instagram a lot. Not on his feed, but his stories.
Every time he lands in a city, he posts a story. Usually it’s just back of his seat, or sometimes the view out the window—on the tarmac, never anything exciting, one of just many cities their lives are broken up into—and a location tag. Low effort.
It’s pretty obvious what it is. Guys laugh about it, call it Rozanov’s Fuck Signal. The easiest way to get the hot girls who follow him to slide into his DMs.
Easy pussy.
Shane wants to be special. He hates himself for it.
✧₊⊹ car wash redhead, tube top r.e.m. concert, juror #6 by rockbound – explicit / 2.8k
# ilya pov, hook-up era, post-finale, financial management, rabies as a love language.
When Ilya sees someone he knows what they have and how to ask for it in a way where it will be given. Ilya did this to Shane himself, intuitively. The only trick is to have no fear, and even less fear than that the more trouble one is in. He cannot teach that to a man who has directed his energies into becoming, not like a saint, but like a painting of a saint, all dripping in symbolism: the way the robe drapes here, yes, that is on purpose, and the angle of the light, the patron’s face in the crowd, the instrument of the martyrdom in his hand and the fruit in the bowl on the table, all arranged except when—
What is a real person? Can it learn to be loved?
✧₊⊹ six-seven-eight, triple nine, eight-two-one-two by insatiablegaydesire – teen / 2.7k
# shane pov, the era between hook-ups, episode: 1x02, texting, flirting.
It starts, like any good small talk does, about the weather.
‘Jane. I am dying.’
Shane is still in bed, spending his last hour before practice clicking endlessly through YouTube when he gets the notification. With no one there to see, he lets the smile settle comfortably as it spreads, and switches apps. He’s about to shoot down Ilya’s latest attempt at desperate seduction when another text arrives.
‘I will play next game with no feet because cold took them.’
This... was new.
Shane expects texts from Ilya to bring him to his knees. They do, but in another way instead.
[notes: this category is for fics that, you guessed it, diverge from canon in a significant way. basically, stories that take a sharp turn away from canon at one point or another, thus changing the trajectory of the original plot. that change could happen very early on (like, literally before the 2009 draft even happens), or could occur much later in the timeline—the fic simply has to be set in canon to begin with in order to be included in this section.]
✧₊⊹ something you can fix ‘series by some1_around – mature / 134.7k
# shane pov, ilya pov (missing scenes), episode: 1x05 divergent, public outing, panic attacks, dissociation, contract trades, shane leaves montreal.
Maybe if the video ended there, Shane thought, it would be okay. Okay-ish. Still incriminating. Still a fucking disaster. Still embarrassing, to have his breakup with this beautiful actress filmed and disseminated on Reddit of all fucking places, but not a nail in his coffin, burying him alive. But the video didn’t end there.
Shane’s conversation with Rose is secretly recorded. Months later, after the All-Star game and Ilya’s confession in Russian, the video gets leaked online. Shane is outed to the world while Ilya is in Russia, and must now finish the 2016-2017 season with the entire world in on his secret.
✧₊⊹ winners ‘series by pressuretoparty – explicit / 80.9k
# dual pov, post-finale, not tlg-compliant, jealousy, depression, suicidal thoughts, erectile dysfunction (due to medication), gambling, injuries, medical negligence, under-negotiated kink, pain play, unprotected sex, car sex, public coming out.
Their rivalry, as history has written it, has finally come to an end.
“I won,” Shane breathes, and the smile, the smile that’s been plastered on his face since he scored, grows wider.
He doesn’t care how close he is to Ilya on the ice right now. He doesn’t care that people might see and think he looks gay. He lifts one hand, still shaky with adrenaline, and claps it onto Ilya’s helmet, dragging their faces together. Ilya starts, and in his surprise, lets himself get pulled forward.
He wants Ilya to hear him say these next words.
“I beat you,” he whispers, awed.
Since he was seventeen, all Shane Hollander has done is chase after Ilya Rozanov. He’s chased after him on the ice. He’s chased him in the rankings, in cup victories. He’s chased after Ilya into hotel rooms, into stolen moments on gala balconies and gym staircases.
It’s true. Ilya ruined him.
Shane’s grip on Ilya’s helmet tightens.
And now, Shane’s finally beaten him.
Ilya stills, only for a moment, before his smile returns. “Do not worry, Hollander,” Ilya leans in close, too close, arguably, for plausible deniability. But Shane can’t even stop him, even if he tries. Shane is completely helpless, to the intensity of his gaze, to the possessive lilt to his lips.
Ilya hisses this next part, just for Shane to hear. “I am not that easy.”
Shane and Ilya try this dating thing for real.
✧₊⊹ and i spit out the seeds by linearity – explicit / 24.2k
# ilya pov, episode: 1x05 divergent, leaked sex tape, public outing, impromptu road trip, unprotected sex.
The video takes a few seconds to get going. It’s fuzzy, hard to make out, warm-lit and dim. Sheets rustle. Ilya lifts his eyes, shooting Cliff a look that means, ‘What am I supposed to be watching?’
And then the footage becomes clear. Ilya drops the phone.
But the video keeps playing. Now, Ilya understands the noises he’d been hearing before.
White noise. A ringing in his ears. Tinnitus. Ilya feels bile rise up his throat.
“What the fuck?”
A video of Shane sucking Ilya’s dick is leaked. Over the next twenty-four hours, Ilya goes on an odyssey.
✧₊⊹ play destroy by kneeinjury – explicit / 11.7k
# shane pov, episode: 1x01 divergent, infidelity (not between shane/ilya), jealousy, unprotected sex, feminization.
Shane is silent for so long that Rozanov leans, slouching against the doorframe, and raises his eyebrows at him expectantly. “Yes? You are selling bibles?”
“You fucked my girlfriend.” It tears out of him.
“Ah,” Rozanov drawls, as if the thought is just now occurring to him, “yes. I did.”
No one knocks and no one opens. Not until years later.
[notes: basically what it says on the tin. i don’t read nearly as many au fics for hollanov because i’m a canon-universe whore, but there are definitely some amazing ones out there that i’ve enjoyed and had to include. also! just because it’s au, doesn’t mean there’s no hockey lol. sometimes it’s just hockey in a slightly different font, if you will. what can i say? hockey is so fucking baked into the narrative of these boys and their relationship—it’s rare for me to branch out lmao.]
✧₊⊹ apogee by opalapparition – explicit / 50.4k
# shane pov, astronaut au, international space station, forced proximity, near-death experience, panic attacks, jealousy, unprotected sex, zero-gravity sex.
Shane Hollander is the youngest Commander in ISS history; straight-backed, closeted, and so tightly on his own leash that seven months in orbit with Ilya Rozanov have not produced a single crack in his composure.
Ilya Rozanov is the Russian cosmonaut who should have had his job, won’t stop bouncing a tennis ball off the walls, and is still looking for a fissure. Thankfully, a solar storm finds it for him.
Near-death, zero gravity, and the wrong man’s hands in exactly the right places.
✧₊⊹ a world brought together as one ‘series by tofuflower – explicit / 14.2k
# shane pov, a/b/o au, alpha ilya rozanov, beta shane hollander, jealousy, miscommunication, scent marking, sex toys, masturbation, knotting.
Being a beta has always meant safety for Shane Hollander. No expectations, no instincts, no distractions from hockey.
Unfortunately, he meets Ilya Rozanov.
Heated Rivalry, but make it omegaverse. Even still, their relationship is unconventional—for multiple reasons.
This is an ongoing list that will be updated as I read more !!
🏒 Baby, I’m Yours | 2.3k
Ilya soft doms Shane into subspace and makes him feel better after a bad game
🏒 Comfort Weight | 2.3k
Shane refuses to sit on Ilya's face and Ilya takes personal offense to it
🏒 Free Shot | 3.1k
“Sex,” Shane says. He keeps his volume level, resists the urge to drop into a whisper. It feels so wrong to say this sort of stuff with the sunlight on his back. “I want you to use me for sex.”
🏒 Drop Your Gloves (Then Your Pants) | 5.2k
Ilya spanks Shane for the first time for fighting, then has to leave, causing Shane to experience subdrop for the first time.
🏒 Vibrate | 6.6k
One day, Shane will learn not to take the “you are scared.” bait from Ilya. Today is not that day.
🏒 I’m Gonna Get You Back | 7.5k
When Ilya shows up unexpectedly at his door, Shane finally gets sweet revenge for Las Vegas. They didn’t even kiss, and Shane takes that personally.
🏒 Forever Is A Feeling (And I Know It Well) | 7.5k
Shane and Ilya celebrate Valentine’s Day together
🏒 It’s More Than A Dream, It’s More Than Desire | 8.3k
Ilya had another day left in Moscow. Shane couldn’t stop thinking about him. (Or, oddly enough, Wayne Gretzky.)
🏒 Such A Pretty Crier | 10.3k
Shane tries to starve himself as punishment for losing, Ilya tries to feed him, and it turns into a very soft night of pampering because Ilya is legally incapable of staying angry at a crying Shane.
🏒 Collared | 10.6k
One comment about a collar is all it takes for Shane’s wedding reception—and his sanity—to completely derail.
🏒 Jane | 17.2k
Shane wears Ilya’s jersey....and Ilya? Ilya short-circuits so hard he nearly forgets how to stand
🏒 Fluent in What We Never Named | 31.0k
Shane realizes that he and Ilya are in a very under negotiated D/s relationship
no one is asking for this but i have to make my one million hours on ao3 mean something
the texture of memory: to write a silly blurb would do it a disservice i think, but just read it i am so serious, completed
your presence has gone through me (like needle through a thread): ilya gets a family and i cry one million tears of joy, wip
the anatomy of a bird heart in slow decay: an impossible love story and meditation on grief, mothers and sons, and survival. featuring ghosts in the literal sense. completed
fall in love again and again: the classic tuna-melt groundhog day, with a house of leaves flavour, completed
Jessica: teenaged shane as seen through his relationship with his high school girlfriend, i love them both so unbearably much, completed
home economics: nhl lockout leads to hollanov living together in the situationship era-there's no way this could go wrong! completed
Route 96 Kanata: shane suffers a career ending injury before meeting ilya but where there's a will there's a tortured hollanov situationship nonetheless. full of fantastic ottawan idiosyncrasies. wip
World on Your Shoulders: what if shane had a queer rookie while deep in the midst of his internalized homophobia "i'm not gay" era? fascinating and wonderfully pessimistic characterization, this whole series is a dark comedy that i want to swallow whole, completed
wunderkind: breathtaking look into yuna hollander's inner world but everyone really shines through wonderfully here (ilya my heart i love you so much), completed
I have only two emotions (careful fear and dead devotion): shane disappears from hockey post prospect cup and hollanov meets again much farther down the road, gorgeous tender slow burn, wip
we'll make a home on the cracks: journalist shane fights his way out of an ethics torment nexus and finds true love <3 cute hollanov & fun shane characterization, wip
car wash redhead, tube top R.E.M. concert, juror #6: hollanov character study, power and love, i adore those freaks so much <3, completed
frequently, secretly fond of each other: boston! shane, you know it you love it, wip
some pacific wind: the pains of being asian in a nearly all-white sport and having to communicate to the world exclusively in your second language: a hollanov conversation, completed
side note: all of satorussuguru's heated rivalry fics are fantastic and are on here in spirit if not in actual text
It had to be you, Wonderful you: transmasc ilya you are soooo dear to me, completed
Offside: coach/player forbidden hollanov but it's sweeter than you would expect. wip
Honey, you're familiar like my mirror years ago: climbing inside your soulmates body is a thing that is both normal to want and possible to have (ft. painful but warming version of shane's life post. career ending injury), wip
dark out and still thirty degrees: one of the only a/b/o fics i've ever enjoyed (sorry), dives into the misogyny in the bones of the genre in a way that's very cathartic for me. ft. a fascinating trans shane journey. completed
head and body to you: tortured self-destructive shane character study, toxic? situationship hollanov, canon-typical emotion development through the lens of sex, completed
the soviet montage: obviously already popular but i had to, cold-war era hollanov post. ilya's defection from the soviet union, completed
i've been waiting my whole life to know i wanted you: deep dive into shane's militant self denial that also fleshes out a much more culturally-connected japanese-canadian experience for him. #lifegetsbetter(eventually), completed
pronoms possessifs: shane writes a love letter, just wonderful completed
Home Ice Advantage: another boston! shane but diving more deeply into how being traded would impact the hockey of it all, very perfectionism torment nexus, completed (with wip sequel)
Blizost: what if you could climb inside your lover and share one body between two souls?, wip
Mama's Boy, Mama's Boy: shane hollander's journey if the whole time he was also haunted by his situationship's dead mom, fantastic irina characterization, completed
cracked plexiglass: canon rewrite that fleshes out a version of shane's pre-NHL hockey career that's more realistic to the actual environment of high level Canadian juniors, very very good, wip
i know where to draw the line: older captain shane and younger teammate ilya, super cute, completed
Overlay: very well written, read the authors note in the beginning before starting, completed
one of your eyes is always half-shut (something happened when you were a kid): it's GivingAlexeiDimensionality2026 !! such a gut punch to read as an older sibling, completed
Plexiglass Box: what if hollanov met as teens in Moscow? (ilya x coach's son but it was shane the whole time), Excellent tension, completed (sequel incoming hopefully)
but what if I need you in my darkest hour? : our favorite hockey players plane crash Bad on the way to 2017 All Stars, painful in all the ways, completed
always, sun: canon,,,,,,,divergence?? magical realism, gorgeous and vaguely terrifying, completed
I. ONE LITTLE GOD FALLING OVER ANOTHER: the last year in boston, has hardly begun but the mixed media format is so good and the tension is so thick,,,,,pit in my stomach as i eagerly await the rest, wip
nothing makes me feel as good: shane character study through jj's eyes, god im so obsessed with this crazy crazy man, completed
Hello From Moscow, Goodbye from Montreal: canon divergence circa 2012 where ilya calls shane drunk one night, and keeps calling after that, equally funny and devastating, wip
there are like millions more that i will add once i remember them
i like: conflict, kink, thoughtful things. i don't like: straight fluff. there are several fics w a third party on this list, but theyr all very shane/ilya about it.
world enough and time by jtimu (nc-17, 2.8k)
post cottage, est rel
“What would you do if we had more time?”
the formless being by anonymous (nc-17, 3k) ♥️
ep 1, character study
Ilya is at the door.
sublineation by dinosaur (nc-17, 3k)
est rel, D/s, tattoos
Ilya has an idea of what Shane can carry with him after their time at the cottage ends, to keep Ilya close.
do unto others by maplesalad (nc-17, 3.6k) ♥️
ep 2, coercion, scott hunter
Clean hands, that’s him. All-American, good mentor, generous, easy with the rookies, liked by the vets, great in the room.
destroyer by animcompletelist (nc-17, 3.7k) ♥️
ep 2, D/s
“And if you win?” Hollander asks.
Ilya could not possibly fit all that he wants into neat, nice syllables, so he grabs Hollander by the jaw and kisses him instead.
If he wins, he thinks, and even if he fucking doesn’t, what he wants most is to ruin Hollander so much that no one else will ever do. He also needs a fucking cigarette.
There’s an idea.
let's make a team by a_good_soldier (nc-17, 4.4k)
threesome, double penetration
At the 2021 All-Star Games in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Ilya comes to Scott with a proposition.
man of the hour by chaentics (t, 5.6k) ♥️
ep 1
The draft scene but what if they met up during it and drank champagne
sweet inside by destielpasta (nc-17, 5.8k)
hookup era, sexting
Shane is all alone in his time of need. He learns about sexting and trying not to sext, and what can happen to a mind left alone to wander until the real thing is in front of you.
yes, i come back by naokime (nc-17, 6.2k)
hookup era, painplay
His body is good for two things: hockey and sex—even then, the latter comes with an asterisk. He’s good at being available for sex, he supposes, and that is a thought he cannot afford to entertain.
rook by catalpawaltz (nc-17, 6.8k) ♥️
minor shane/scott, ilya haunts the narrative
Simulacrum (n.) /sɪm yəˈleɪ krəm/ "an object possessing merely the form or appearance of a certain thing, without possessing its substance or proper qualities; a specious imitation or likeness.”
Or, Ilya finds out.
in the clutch by mcshrug (nc-17, 8k)
hookup era, D/s, orgasm denial
Ilya is in charge of when Shane gets off. Shane is testing the limits of that deal.
is it a video by garagepaperback (nc-17, 8k)
hookup era, assplay
Shane lowers his voice. “I didn’t think you were serious about that.”
“Yes, you did.” Rozanov has a way of talking that makes it feel like he has more teeth than a normal person. How a shark has two rows so that a second always snags you, scrapes off the perfect amount to swallow you whole just when you think you’ve survived the first. “When am I not serious about you, Hollander?”
crossfire by makemegentle (nc-17, 9.6k)
threesome, double penetration, feminization
In 2014, Ilya and Marleau went to Paris on a girl to celebrate the Stanley Cup win. Ten years later, on a balmy evening spent in the Hollander-Rozanov Ottawa home, Marleau reminisces and, courtesy of Shane and Ilya, re-enacts.
la petit mort by anincompletelist (nc-17, 9.6k)
hookup era, orgasm denial
Shane’s steps for hockey success are clean cut, precise, and scientific, easy to give in a tidy, pre-packaged answer: a tried and true fitness plan, a macrobiotic diet and meal prep, yoga for relaxation, and a disciplined bedtime routine—yes, even on the weekends and the off-season.
And also celibacy. But that one he usually leaves out during interviews.
heated rivalry fics that are well researched / generally clever / conceptually smart. or all of the above
some of my favorites. im missing tons i need more recs
sleeping with the lights on - Shaylinne
(ilya gets thrown in jail. non linear narrative . politics, lawyers, journalism, svetlana!!!!
quote from me: “this fic to me is like the syllabus of a course taught by a crazy educated professor that is a blessing upon the college”)
summary: “”If hockey was that important for geopolitics,” María deadpans, leaning across the table to stab another pelmeni with her fork. “The Chinese would’ve gotten into it by now. The Russians want international concessions, and this is a cheap trick to get it. To be completely honest—”
She dunks the pelmeni into her bowl. It almost looks like she’s drowning it when she twists the fork, coating it in fragrant orange soup. It almost looks like it’s a thrashing animal.
“—it’s really annoying me. From a purely tradecraft perspective, from one lawyer to another, it’s a cheap trick,” María continues, pelmeni between her teeth. “Canada isn’t even the country who’s detaining Russian arms dealers. That’s US shit. It’s fucking annoying.”
Shane doesn’t say anything. Shane’s looking at the pictures splayed across the table, face-up, and thinking about how if this all ends here, all Shane will have to show people when they ask about Ilya are six mugshots from when he was transferred from the Moscow jail to the Siberian penal colony, where his cheeks are hollowed out and his eyes are vacant.”
Drag Hunt - R_Knight
(fantastic characterization and concept, beautiful prose but never flowery. an au which is completely believable)
ch1 authors note: “I read a non-fiction book a few years back called ‘Running Free’ – about the author’s experiences with running in nature. This story is, in a sense, RPF of one particular chapter of that book. I don’t know how to explain to you the way I felt reading what could be re-written as a 24/7 BDSM hunter/prey relationship, relayed to the reader like it was a relatively normal occurrence, except maybe by writing it out in this fic.”
I. ONE LITTLE GOD FALLING OVER ANOTHER - toyourdetriment
(this fic (and any of toyourdetriment’s writing) truly exudes cleverness and is sooo Alive. mixed media story - mixture of news reports, text messages, jackie pike blunt, text threads, call logs, actual receipts, tweets and more. very meta about communication and secrecy.)
ch1 excerpt:
“Saturday, October 15, 2016, 11:43 p.m.
From: [email protected]
To: [email protected], [email protected]
Fwd: MLH Murmurs Friday Rollup — New team could land in Calgary or Seattle, Vrelsky out in Columbus…
Looks like an expansion draft for a new team in a couple years. Anybody you’d banish to purgatory?
xx
Mom”
If it wasn’t for that meddling kid - ARustySpork
(the hockey in this is written so well it makes me craaave a hockey game. author has a bottomless pit of hockey knowledge and picks the Perfect references to history and various plays to include. and includes a critical lens of the hockey world. this fic has Substance)
Summary: ““I feel really good about this kid, I think he could be great on your wing, he just needs some help settling in. Someone to show him the ropes.”
“Yes.”
The line went silent for a moment. Ilya wasn’t really sure why his coach felt the need to run this by him.
“Rozanov,” his coach said at last. “I want him to live with you.”
Ilya blinked, then nearly shouted into the phone. “What?”
* * *
or, Ilya stays in Boston, gets a rookie, and tries to figure out how to make a secret long distance relationship work while there's a Russian teenager in his house”
There’s a Line in the Sand (I’m Crossing with Both Hands) - Eddywow
(this person Knows and Gets shane. amazing characterization and prose and concept…epistolary #Myshane work.)
summary: “”You know you chew on your pen a lot?” She asked, jaw slipping against her palm as she tried to keep herself awake. Again. Fair. “Like, a lot.”
(Shane has an oral fixation and it’s ruining his life.)”
Dig Two Graves - devovitsuasuartes
(i Love this fic it builds and builds tension and is exciting and harrowing and truly digs its fingers into the wound in an adrenaline inducing way. it’s controversial because of how minimally tagged it is .& i love a polarizing piece of writing.)
summary: “The Montreal Voyageurs won't stop slinging mud at Shane in the press, so Shane and Ilya decide to get revenge the best way they know how.”
and i’ll show you fearless - irreverents
(it’s porn. it’s incredible prose. the specific kink is fitting for hollanov. and ilya is mean! and the author is confident and earnest which transfers to the reader.)
summary:
Ilya likes the chase, and the chase loves him back. Talking shit at Hollander is a pastime he’d wait months to indulge in. Hollander’s more than happy to greet him head-on.
The difference is that Hollander likes being caught too.
or: Ilya seeks in Hollander a consolation prize. It takes ten years for him to obtain something more.
anybody like you - plonk
(this is just so good. another tangible au. the worldbuilding is really immersive and it’s like one big shane character study sandwich but it feels Sooo natural.)
summary: “"Hey, are parties just… like that, for you?" Shane asks. "Like the figure skating kickbacks were in Sochi?"
"What do you mean? Like what?" Joe asks.
"Like. I don't know. Fun?"
"Yeah? Do you go to a lot of bad parties?"
"I don't know." Shane stuffs some kale in his mouth.
"So yes."
It gets lonely at the top. In Sochi, unrivaled generational hockey talent Shane Hollander reconnects with his old skate training buddy, Joe.”
tape 1 - unseemlydisturbed
(awesome. invigorating.)
summary: “[NSFW] [DISTURBING] Video circulating on several gore sites, believed to show Shane Hollander, 24, captain of the Montreal Voyageurs, who was reported missing last Tuesday. Second individual in the video appears to be Ilya Rozanov, 24, of the Boston Bears. Link in thread. DO NOT WATCH IF SENSITIVE. Mods, please don't take this down.
in no particular order. again not listing trigger warnings but u can inbox me if u wanna know something specific.
sympathy fuck by lustmord (the hypersexuality fic)
the weather of your youth by anonymous (the flushing your pills on facetime fic)
wait for a different ending by garagepaperback (the fic that almost was my undoing and i had to put myself to bed and return another day. aka the rat dog fic.)
luchik, darling by chaentics (when u tag something 'immigration and emigration' i am there)
geryon by agoodsoldier (that's my baby child... that's my boy...)
another uninnocent, inelegant fall by anonymous (that's my BOY lmaoooo)
slash and burn by eleadore (i just like it when shane gets to be morally dubious)
like thieves in the night by providing_leverage (ilya playing dead on the bed is such a visual)
back in the country, back on my bullshit, some fic recs
on ilya
sympathy fuck by lustmord (E | 10463 | Shane/Ilya, Ilya/others)
We won’t release a statement right away, someone from the front office said, but if you’re missing a couple games there’s going to be questions. What are we going to call it? A family emergency?
Ilya had almost laughed. What emergency? His father is already fucking dead.
car wash redhead, tube top R.E.M. concert, juror #6 by rockbound (E | 2832 | Shane/Ilya)
The only trick is to have no fear, and even less fear than that the more trouble one is in. Ilya cannot teach that to a man who has directed his energies into becoming, not like a saint, but like a painting of a saint, all dripping in symbolism: the way the robe drapes here, yes, that is on purpose, and the angle of the light, the patron’s face in the crowd, the instrument of the martyrdom in his hand and the fruit in the bowl on the table, all arranged except when—
on the mlh
Teeth I barely knew I had by distressednoise (T | 3970 | Ilya-centric)
Ilya wrings out his shirt and tries to swallow the humilation burning at the back of his throat. "It is very funny," he says, flatly. "I am enjoying these jokes. I love to pay damages at every hotel. Is good for your poor sad American economy."
"They do it to everyone," Price repeats, as if Ilya is just anybody and that makes it ok.
Or: Ilya's rookie season costs more than expected.
some pacific wind by satorussuguru (G | 8792 | Shane/Ilya)
Someone’s posted a shaky video from the stands, just behind the whole altercation. It’s close enough to catch the snarl on Rozanov’s face as he charges up the steps. He’s so pretty, Shane thinks faintly. The video starts too late to show what set him off, but it catches the tail end of what the man is yelling, the things he's saying about Shane, before pivoting to calling Rozanov a cunt and bitch and a pussy instead.
//
Rozanov drops his gloves for Shane. He wishes he could just be grateful, but it feels a little bit like the end of the world.
fucking ilya rozanov
possibilities by anonymous (E | 6941 | Shane/Ilya)
Shane didn't fuck him, and that’s the part that’s really fucking Ilya over.
reciprocation by watchriverdale (E | 3137 | Shane/Ilya)
It’s not that he thinks Rozanov’s unsatisfied, exactly. But. Maybe that’s because he only sees Shane a handful of times a year. If it were more often, if they had a more regular schedule, maybe Roz’s curiosity would have run out by now. It did before, and Shane has been so fucking careful, not to repeat those mistakes, so if this is a problem, well. Shane can be interesting.
me, in shapes to make you pleased by eternalbrook (E | 1889 | Shane/Ilya)
“Oh, so is my fault I am big strong top with giant Russian dick and all little bitch boys want to bend over for me? No one cares about my prostate?”
the eroticism of a lens
So Take my Picture, Picture, Picture by TroubleIWant (E | 4431 | Shane/Ilya)
Ilya has some fun ideas about how to show Shane exactly how good he looks getting fucked.
OR
“Is Polaroid,” Ilya clarifies. “No files, no sharing… very private.”
Hollander swallows, stares a beat longer, and then aggressively doesn’t look anywhere near the camera or Ilya. “Okay. So?”
Ilya thinks, it’s always this. Hollander feints towards something he wants, and Ilya gets it for him, and he offers it up like a toy for a cat. Not too needy, not too blasé, he must twitch it at just the right pace. Here, kitty kitty.
“I would like to take some, see how you look,” Ilya offers oh so casually. “It’s just for fun. You can keep all of them, after. Put them through the shredder. I don’t care.” He cares. The things he’d do to keep one of those photos.
Hollander wets his lips, glances back at the camera, flushes. Then the pounce: “You can leave it on the nightstand.”
See you at the Melting Point by DeclaredDove (E | 1509 | Shane/Ilya)
Hollander has a lot of commercials. Ilya has favorites. For normal reasons.
-- --
OR Ilya wants. It’s a problem.
the invention of kink
Buzzer Beater by mcshrug (E | 8257 | Shane/Ilya, but crucially Shane/his own hand)
Shane finds getting himself off boring.
At least, he used to. Before Ilya Rozanov got involved.
Downy by anonymous (M | 3184 | Shane/Ilya)
Ilya blames it on Shane. Only because it is objectively Shane’s fault.
The thing is that Shane likes systems. Schedules. Processes. And Ilya couldn’t care less except that Shane has ruined that, too.
And he never had any intention of admitting it. It was his dirty secret that Shane never needed to know about at all. And if he connected the desperation of Ilya’s want every Sunday after the dryer dinged and he dumped laundry into a hamper to then fold on their bed–and if Ilya would slink into the room and situate himself against the headboard or on the floor against their dresser and just watch, well, objectively, very often Ilya liked to watch Shane.
//
or, Ilya Rozanov has a laundry kink and he's not proud of it.
Sunday Blue by chaentics (E | 9150 | Shane/Ilya)
This is the deal: Ilya and Shane don't know each other. Shane’s there to relax. He’s there to grab a beer and watch whatever’s on the bar TV and speak to no one. Ilya might approach him, or might not. It’s not up to Shane. If he has to wait, he waits. No questions once they’re in it, but there will be nothing unsafe, no doing anything that’d show up on a medical. Shane’s job is to trust—to believe a little.
Again, this is the deal: Shane takes what he’s given.
wips i feel like i'm missing a kidney about
home economics by anonymous (M | Shane/Ilya | 19.7k in 2/3 chs)
The Swiss National League doesn’t care about the legendary Hollander-Rozanov rivalry. When the MLH can’t negotiate with the Hockey Players’ Union in time to prevent a hockey lockout at the start of the 2015 season, the Zürich Lions jump at the chance to sign both Shane and Ilya to short-term contracts. For four months in Switzerland, they share a team, a line, a house, and a bed.
Then the lockout ends in January, and it’s time to go back. Back to different countries, cities, lives. Beds.
i like: conflict, kink, thoughtful things. i don't like: straight fluff
naked, dressed in my pride by hedgerose (nc-17, 3k)
winner's room
"No," Drapeau is saying. "Hollander's a rookie. Off-limits."
call me back someday by hockeyfinches (t, 3k)
ep 4, panic attack
“Why did you even come here?”
“I came to get laid,” Ilya says honestly. “But my friend is not well, so.”
Shane jerks his chin towards the door.
“Still time,” he mutters.
buckle by isozyme (nc-17, 4k) ♥️
ep 4, winner's room
After the club encounter, Shane picks Ilya for the winner’s room. To talk, not anything else.
your best american girl by running_like_a_plover (nc-17, 4k)
ep 4, jealousy
Ilya Rozanov likes blondes. This is a known fact. It makes things easier somehow—safer. Like math. Girls Ilya likes = blonde. Shane = not blonde. So Shane goes a little bit insane after seeing photos of Ilya on a date with a mystery brunette, and Ilya shows him why it's not an issue.
get good by whatimages (nc-17, 5k)
ep 4 divergent, D/s, S&M
Ankle sprain at fifteen, broken ribs and another lost tooth at sixteen. At seventeen, a hairline clavicle fracture that almost cost him his spot at Juniors. Shane's a good patient. Quiet, says please and thank you to the nurses, always does his physio. Never, ever complains.
And then he gets his first concussion.
slow days, fast company by babyteeth (m, 7k) ♥️
shane-centric, ilya haunts the narrative
After his second Cup win, Shane had stared down the gaping maw of August stretched open before him and, for the first time, the thought of spending it fishing and birding at his cottage, alone, without anyone to make him a sandwich or press his head into the space beneath their chin, was unbearable.
Thus, Los Angeles.
close your eyes until the logic's gone by shakebabyshake (nc-17, 7k)
trans shane, wip
"So fucking pretty," Ilya says, talking more to himself than Shane. He rubs his cock through the mess on his face and then taps it softly against Shane's cheek. "Like a girl."
english as a second language by idday (nc-17, 7k)
post-cottage, established relationship
Shane's been fucking Ilya Rozanov for a decade and yet somehow the more time they spend together the more he realizes how little he actually knows about Ilya, like, as a person. As a partner.
Again, he wishes he spoke Russian. That they had any shared native language besides sex and hockey.
slow show by hockeyfinches (nc-17, 8k)
post-cottage, D/s
“If you don’t come here, I will come to you.”
“Rozanov.”
“I will drive,” Ilya tells him without sympathy. “Park illegally in my big muscle car. Everyone will notice. Lots of photos, probably.”
Shane rubs his forehead. He gets to his feet and glances at his bag, still packed, on the hotel dresser.
“I hate your car,” he says, at last.
“Yes, I know,” Ilya says. It sounds like he’s smiling.
do it scared by lark_ral (t, 8k) ♥️
ep 5, internalized homophobia
Shane Hollander's five rules of how to not look gay (and how he breaks them for Ilya Rozanov) + one time he doesn't have to.
this ache of mine by owshampooinmyeyes (m, 13k)
ep 5, ilya-centric, homesickness
feeling soooooo ill, fronds. what goodnesses are in the world, what trials and tribulations and tenderness are we putting hollanov through, what fics are eating your souls for dindin
(And FUCK ICE, y’all. Not because this is some cute trope, but because let’s write about how awful it is. I’ve been in those detention centers.)
For example (timeline vague lol):
~~~~~
It's such a dumb fucking mistake, is the thing. Ilya is tired and hungover and grumpy about having to shove some girl out the door and REALLY grumpy that it isn't Shane--won't ever be Shane again--Shane who is like nine seconds away from marrying RoseFuckingLandry, according to People--and so he packs for America too fast. Throws everything in a couple giant duffels, checks them. Figures he'll do laundry when he's back in Boston. Gets on the plane and spends the entire flight across the Atlantic staring out the window, wondering what the hell he's going to do this year.
It turns out his mental whole calendar revolved around Hollander. Three weeks until we play Montreal, he's said to himself every year. Two weeks. Ten days. We have to beat San Jose so that we play Montreal. The season stretches out before him, pointless and boring. Not boring like Shane doing yoga at his stupid cottage--the kind of boring he could sink into forever. Boring like what's the point?
He doesn't realize, until the drug dog alerts in Boston Logan customs, that he's left his vape pen in the pocket of his sweats, weed cartridge still in it.
