@ballet-and-sugartea - Tumblr Blog

rosentryst

so embarrassing when I like a mainstream song. i thought I was more fucked up than this

Who said no???

White People.

Wait, remember what? The band? Of course. And I’m white. But… was it something else?

kimreesesdaughter

occupy-democrats

Imagine wanting to spend billions on something so easily circumvented.

mstar1960

I guess lefties think that illegal aliens can walk on water.

occupy-democrats

Wow, you’re right. There’s a huge flaw in my post, I forgot that humans have no way to get across water. Thanks for pointing that out, I’ll get right on deleting this.

doomy

jibany-deactivated20200526

babyanimalgifs

He got surprised 😹

Video by @misscleolovesyou

cheese24k

Mama cat encourages her kitten to escape

thotwing-deactivated20190613

THE MAMA CAT IS SO PROUD OF HER KITTEN

bunjywunjy

encourage your children to be criminals

spudsexuall

My boyfriend talks in his sleep and because he’s bilingual, he says some hilarious/weird/sometimes creepy shit. I ask him every morning if he remembers saying this stuff and he has no idea about any of it.

Here are some of my favorites:

-”Babe, can you please turn down the brightness of your skin” -After stealing all of the blankets: “This is my right as a human” -After I take the blankets back: “I don’t want your freedom, America. Just blanket” -Sometimes he just says “Hello?” as if he’s answering a phone call -One night he just said “Cabbage” which is weird because he doesn’t know the english word for that when he’s awake. -After spooning me: “You have a nice butt” -”Who is that in the corner?” (terrifying) -”Watch out for the red lady” (even more terrifying) -Sometimes he will say things in German and it sounds like he’s speaking Parseltongue -One time I actually think he said something in Parseltongue -One time he talked about buying a ticket to “everywhere” and then just said “hello?” after two minutes of silence -And my all time favorite: ”This is MY yogurt, Satan”

alwaysbewoke

these are the days i remember why i love the internet hahaha

marlbororeds100s-deactivated202

in case u wanna see samuel l jackson’s response

filmnoirsbian

Is there rly any softer scene than when o'malley sees duchess and falls in love with her at first sight in the aristocats, complimenting her at every turn and climbing into a cherry blossom tree to make the flower petals snow gracefully down on her? How dreamy 🥀💕

filmnoirsbian

This Is Love 😍😍

phantoms-lair

Not to mention when he found she had kids, he was thrown for a second, then proceeded to not only still help her, but dote on them too.

pitviperofdoom

“Not all men” you’re right, Abraham DeLacey Giuseppe Casey Thomas O’Malley would never.

kids have no concept of anything. i walked into my kindergarten class and one kid asked me what my name was. when i said miss jones, he said “i like that name. did you know i’m in love with you”

letthemountainsmoveyou-deactiva

i asked my four year old cousin how old he thought i was going to be at my next birthday and he said 8. im 23

roonilwazlip-deactivated2022021

once i told a 6 year old that i had finished school and was doing “more school” [university] and she asked “why haven’t you found anyone to marry then”

byeeyeslikeacat-deactivated2019

We were at a museum and I was asking for the student discount and my nine year old cousin looks up at me with his eyes wide and says “wait you’re a STUDENT??”

meelothemanly

I used to babysit these three kids and the eldest who was around 11 at the time was talking about how adults are boring and when I told him I was an adult he said, “That’s not true, you’re my age”

cractasticdispatches

our aunt teaches and she has this story about a little girl who really was always pretty quiet in class and then on the final day of kindergarten she just up and stated ‘i’m all teached now. i don’t need to be teached anymore. i’m done of being teached.’

diamondelight92

once when i was 19, I told my little cousin that i was 19 and she looked up at me with huge eyes and went, “Does that mean you don’t have to bring an adult with you to the pool?”

maraudersvibes

My 6 year old cousin saw me driving for the first time, looked up at him mom and said “does that mean she is married now?”

standard-fiend

I watched my dad and my niece (3 at the time) arguing over a pair of pants and whether or not they were also a dress. My neice’s argument was that they were, in fact, also a dress because they were blue.

loveyoutothem00n

I asked the kids in my daycare class what they thought I should be for Halloween and this little boy goes, “ooh I know! A pickle! You’d be such a good pickle”

aimmyarrowshigh

On the first day of class with my favorite student of all time, I said, “Are you okay? You look like you have a question.” And she looked me right in the eyes and said, tremulously,

“Can a piranha eat a stapler?”

manic-kin

One time I was working with a kid and he looked up at me and asked “Do you have a boy?” I had no idea what he was talking about, but I told him that I did not have any boys. He looked shocked and then deeply concerned and said “Well, you better hurry up and shave your arms so you can get married; August is next month!”

dinovia-grant

I was sitting on the floor with my 3yo niece and we were playing with her younger brother’s alphabet blocks and the O had an octopus on it. So I picked it up and asked her what it was.

“Octopus,” she said, all curls and smiles.

“And what kind of animal is an octopus?” I asked. I was looking for “fish” or “sea creature” but I would have accepted almost anything–”weird,” “gross,” even “slimy.” “Underwater” or “it lives in the ocean” would have also been acceptable.

She looks me right in the eye and says, happy as a clam, “It’s a cephalopod.”

I haven’t been the same since.

sandandglass

President Obama tries to get a driver’s license

emotions-are-dangerous

this is funny

king-emare

his face in the last one 😭😭😭

bestnatesmithever

I don’t care about your political beliefs, but just compare Obama’s sense of humor to Trump’s fat shaming and jokes about disabled people and goddamn I miss Obama.