[cottagehillsunset]

Ilya who, whenever Jurrasic Park or any sort of dinosaur movie is on, takes a picture of the TV and sends it to Scott Hunter with a "good game" or "did not kow you were playing tonight".

Scott just lets out a long sigh everytime and counts to ten in his head.

He ends up on the same flight to New York as Shane after an away game in Ottawa, with Scott going back home and Shane travelling for the launch of a new Rebook store in New York.

And Scott can't help but laugh when he sees what the in flight movie options are. At Shane's curious look he waves at the small tv screen and explains the bit Ilya has going on. And Shane, just for a second, gets this weird glint in his eyes before offering Scott one of his earbuds with a smile.

"Want to rewatch the game with me instead?", he asks, holding up his IPad. And, why the hell not, Scott thinks, there are worse things than reviewing their game with Shane (even though he doubts Shane will share any of his strategical thoughts with him).

So, Scott takes the earbud and settles into his seat. Only to be hit with the opening notes of Jurrasic Park five seconds in.

[ilyannarozanova]

Baby Ilya crashing out on the ice because his mom says it's time to go to bed (it is incredibly late even by adult standards) while on the other side of the world baby Shane is jumping on his parents' bed at 5am sharp demanding that they drive him to the rink the second it opens. Many such cases.

[laurens-german]

fictional men written by women we love you. OFF CAMPUS (2026—)

[scunthotter]

Tuna melt au where Shane starts freaking out and so to distract him Ilya is like "I got the marble imported from Turkey, custom cut by a local contractor here in Boston" and Shane wants to have a freak out but he's always wondered about the quality of marble from Turkey, he got his counters from Italy and China but he saw options from Turkey and Brazil and wondered. He really should go, but now he's wondering if Ilya will answer his other questions like who was the architect that built this house and where did ilya find that tile that's in his guest bathroom. Basically Ilya using Shane's real estate fetish to keep him from running out during the tuna meltdown.

[amygdalae]

As a bisexual person I'm keenly aware of how such stereotypes are inevitably harmful to us, but unfortunately when I see bisexuals in fiction who are Evil and stylish and fuck like champions I can't help but go "oh work" for a sec. It's a difficult conundrum

[behold-nonsense]

"I know the average joe is using this as a reason to hate us but god I wish that were me"

[amygdalae]

As a bisexual person I'm keenly aware of how such stereotypes are inevitably harmful to us, but unfortunately when I see bisexuals in fiction who are Evil and stylish and fuck like champions I can't help but go "oh work" for a sec. It's a difficult conundrum

[behold-nonsense]

"I know the average joe is using this as a reason to hate us but god I wish that were me"

[vesnuszki]

Shane’s head smashing into the headboards and he’s yelling fuck Ilya harder!!! Meanwhile Ilya’s heart rate is 182bpm and he’s like fuck Shane I have a cramppp

[vesnuszki]

[gimmiekiss1221]

trophy room scene this, "hold onto something rozanov" that THIS IS THE PART I DESPERATELY WANT TO SEE ON SCREEN:

[mymoonandmyshane]

another incredibly tragic thing shane just drops casually happens when he and ilya do a house tour for gq or some shit. the interviewer asks something like “whats the biggest change in your living space since coming out and moving in together” and shane goes “honestly just being able to comfortably live with each other. for a long time we were erasing every tiny detail of ourselves so we wouldnt be caught. but now we can have our wedding pictures on the mantel :)” and everyone dies

[thisfeebleheart]

heads thrown back in pleasure parallel (insp. by @crossnecklace's tags on this post)

[toasted-rivalry]

Ilya and Shane, but it’s just them seeing each other as a version of their husband no one else understands them seeing.

To Ilya, Shane is the funniest, sexiest, bitchiest and downright FREAKIEST person he knows. He tells everyone he knows this, yet for some reason no one seems to believe him. His husband is such an asshole, and Ilya loves him for it.

While to Shane, Ilya is his soft and most precious baby. A heart of gold and with feelings so wide and deep he is breathless at just how much he CARES. Sunshine itself. Shane laughs at how people describe his ‘scary, no-smiling Slavic nightmare of a husband.’ See Ilya! He DOES get sarcasm (he does not.)

[andr0mache-deactivated20170706]

I just want to be financially stable and having really good sex.

[jewelcoatfish]

drunk shane burying himself in the crook of ilya’s neck whispering “i love you, i never loved anyone like i love you, i love you so much, i’m so happy you’re the first person i see every morning and the last person i see at night. i miss you all the time when we’re not together. i love you.” and ilya covering his mouth with his hand to stop the sniffles coming out and scaring shane

[pics-that-make-you-go-hmm]

[dreams85andmore]

[gusilux]

[hr-rep]

Shane getting criticized for not using pride tape and he’s caught on a mic later that week saying I didn’t realize it wasn’t the sucking dick that made me gay but the rainbow . Which is how he comes out.

[hr-rep]

@persimmony-snicket EXACTLYYYY

[cliff-marleaus-left-toe]

I have this headcanon where in an alternative universe Ilya had a moment of insight at the beginning of their hookups so when The Raiders asked where he was going instead of saying he was gonna see Montreal Jane he was like 'I am gonna see my close personal friend Shane Hollander we are gonna eat takeout and play videogames in his house he is my best friend actually.' And the Raiders were like, 'Yeah, right.' But he kept the bit, and every time they were in Montreal, he told the Raiders he was meeting Shane, and the rivalry was just league PR bullshit. They never truly believed him, but it didn't really matter at the time. And When they were eventually at the cottage and Shane told Ilya his plan Ilya was like 'Do not be mad but I have been telling Raiders you are my best friend and every time we play monteral I come to see you to play videogames and eat takeout for years and they never belived me so there is still plusably denibility but if you wanna launch a friendship we dont have to wait or built up I already laid the groundwork.' And Shane is in his head like 'I am gonna marry this man.' So they announce the charity the same summer and the raiders are like 'well shit he was telling the truth.' And since Ilya did lay the groundwork, when the media asks them about Ilya and Shane's 'have been friends the whole time' narrative, the Raiders are like, 'Yeah, he told us they were friends; we just didn't believe him.' Which makes the public opinion on their friendship largely positive but doesn't really change the overall timeline all that much just gives them some room to be publicly affectionate and kind of takes the heat off the fanmail gate bc instead of the public thinking it was an enemies-to-lovers hot sex in hotel rooms 9-year situationship with messy breakups and hookups in between they think it was a slow-burn friends-to-lovers situation filled with yearning and Queer self discovery which is more palatable to the public.

[jewelcoatfish]

shane (a little tipsy) being cornered by a few fans at a bar one night and they ask him what’s the best thing about coming out, expecting him to say something motivating like self-expression and liberation and shane just goes

“i don’t know, probably that i can have ilya’s photos on my phone now :).”

and the whole of non bigot hockey twt just fucking crash out and montreal metros and crowell gets burned at the stake

[toapoet]

These tags are my fave