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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
YOU ARE THE REASON
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cherry valley forever
#extradirty
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@bellawrites
The sun sank from the sky, taking the light away with it. Darkness answered, taking its place in the streets and homes of the city. As the concerns of dwindling resources gripped the populace they either congregated around the great bonfires in the city center or let go of the light entirely and slept.
listen. i know jk rowling knows absolutely nothing about america but for the entire country to only have a single wizarding school there must be either 200 professors working at this place or you get to your first potions class and it’s held in a fucking baseball stadium.
#[megaphone voice] and now-now-now put your hands together for the DRAUGHT OF LIVING DEATH-eath-eath#[sound of a crowd screaming]#[fireworks]#[indistinct question from the eighty-third row]#[megaphone voice] YES THIS WILL BE ON THE TEST (via transhansolo)
SO A FRIEND AND I ACTUALLY JUST DID THE MATH ON THIS.
Between 1972-1979 there were 5,802,282 live births in the United Kingdom. These live births account for the roughly 600 Hogwarts students during Harry’s first year, and would make the birth rate of Wizards approximately 0.01% of the population.
The population of the United States in 2014 was 318.9 million - 23.1% of which were children 0-17. That would mean there were 73,665,900 children in 2014. Checking live births from a time period of 1997-2003 (which would account for children aged 11-17) gives us 27,978,287 children. If 0.01% of them were magical, we’re left with 27,978 school age magical children in the United States in 2014.
If we wanted school sizes similar to Hogwarts - 600 children to a school - we would need at minimum 47 magical schools. If we wanted it more comparable to our own schooling - with an average student body size of roughly 1,430 students combined between middle school and high school during the 2009-2010 school years - we’re down to a minimum of 20 magical schools.
So, long story short. It is statistically impossible for there to be a single magical school in the United States.
It’s far more likely there is at least one school in each state, possibly more than one in much larger states like Alaska, Texas, and California while a single school could feasibly serve the clustered smaller states like Rhode Island, Massachusetts, and Connecticut.
whoa.
Okay but like…there are closer to 280 students at Hogwarts at any given time. Like I know that isn’t what JK said, but that’s what she’s shown us. An average of 10 students per house per year (five boys and five girls), four houses (40 students per year), seven years (280 students). We could argue that there would be less students in Harry’s year than usual because there was a war going when he was born, but the only other year we can compare it to is Harry’s dad’s year, when the Gryffindor boys only had four students.
Which means the US school would have 100 times as many students as Hogwarts.
#I think we can all agree to ignore ilivernoy or whatever the fuck it’s called#for a number of reasons
tbh the tumblr series of Wizardins schools Around the World is what i consider canon
@phoenixwrites WE WERE RIGHT AND MATH SAYS SO
So if “The Devil Went Down to Georgia” is be believed, you can fiddle duel the devil for your soul. My question is, does it only work with fiddles, or any contest? Saxophone duel? Guitar shred-off? Can you challenge the devil to a rap battle when he comes for you?
Even though I play piano I want to see someone fight for their soul with the tuba.
The Devil went back to Georgia and his thoughts were dark and cold That Johnny kid had screwed him and he still needed a soul. When he came across this young man blowin’ on a tuba and playin’ hits And the devil took one look and said “You know what? Fuck this shit.”
“Kid, I know you won’t believe this, but I play the tuba too “And if you wanna wager, well I’ve got a deal for you “If I’m the better tubist, then I get to take your soul “If you’re the best, you get this horn here, made from solid gold.”
The boy replied, “My name is Hans, and though it may be wrong, “Your bet’s pretty intriguing, so I guess I’ll play along”
Hans, clean out your spit valves, and get ready for a show, Two tubas feudin’ face to face; pick up your horn and blow. ‘Cause if you win, you get a brand new tuba made of gold, And if you lose the Devil gets your soul!
(Oompah music intensifies)
The Devil opened up his case and said, “I’ll start, I guess.” And fire puffed out from the bell as on the valves he pressed He raised the mouthpiece to his lips, it made a wicked BLART And a band of lederhosen demons joined in with him to start
(Roll Out the Barrel plays with extended tuba solo)
Hans looked the Devil in the eye, once he finished his piece, Said “That’s okay, old man, but just you get a load of this!”
(http://youtu.be/zmFYgc-Emmc and skip to 2:20)
The Devil bowed his head, because he knew he can’t compete. He dragged that heavy tuba down; it crashed by Hans’s feet. He turned away from Hans and as he retreated he said, “Forget this crap. I’m gonna try telemarketing instead.”
(Tuba outro)
@hamstergal you are amazing and owe me 1 clean monitor.
:(((
Fiddles are historically associated with the devil not through any Christian imagery, but because older European folk tradition held that several uber powerful water demons, known as nock, nikyr, necks, etc, were insanely good fiddle players.
In Norway, for example, the violin known as the Hardanger fiddle was played initially by the creepy otherwordly beings, like the hulderfolk, the trolls, as well as the nock. There are equivalents in other European cultures.
These beings were known as preternaturally skilled fiddle players, the nocks above all others. So some people would make a deal to learn the fiddle from the nock, or have their children trained. The only problem being nocks usually needed life or blood sacrifices to learn their skills.
So as Christianity was introduced, the water demon nock was conflated with the devil. Because other stories of nykyrs, nocks, etc were generally sacrificing a human to appease treacherous tides, which was the pinnacle of terror.
The devil knows the fiddle, because the ancient tradition is that if you can win your freedom from the nocks, they will honor this pact.
this post is the perfect mix of creativity, historical facts, and folklore/mythology, and above all shitposting.
This right here is the kind of content I want on my dash.
(Oompah music intensifies) (OOMPAH MUSIC INTENSIFIES)
confession
Really really honored to have done the Google Doodle today for one of my animation heroes Lotte Reiniger! She made the oldest surviving feature length animation, and created the predecessor to the multiplane camera, predating disney. Her films still hold up as extremely beautiful and witty fairy tales.
I’m really thankful to my team, who trusted me when I said I was going to build my own rig and puppets and film a 90 second short in a few months.
Check it out [here] if you have a minute!
Bonus: Some of my puppets! Silhouette animation is amazing and very forgiving in some senses.
4 Ways to Ground Your Fantasy Novel
Writers often dabble in the surreal, especially when writing fantasy or science fiction. We asked a few writers to share how they approach creating magical worlds. Today, Zanzibar 7, writer and participant, shares four tips to ground your flights of fancy:
Writing fantasy should be the easiest of all genres. You can write almost anything and it can be believed—simply because you wrote it. But there can be a line between believable fantasy and fantasy that is too absurd for belief.
The late, amazing Sir Terry Pratchett wrote about a world in the shape of a disc, carried on the back of four elephants who are carried on the back of a giant turtle. It’s absurd in the highest, but Pratchett turns this mytheme on its head by using odd twists to somehow make the entire premise more believable, not less.
So what is it that takes something absurd and surreal and makes it believable? When I’m writing humor, I do the following:
Keep reading
“When nothing keeps me up all hours, it’s something,” Fancy said. “Sometimes it’s something with the name of my ex-husband.”
“Of course not,” Fancy said. “It’s short hand. I won’t give that bitch the satisfaction of learning her name.”
“Hot chocolate,” Fancy said, “I’ve found it’s a pretty good cure-all for an injured heart. Come on, I’m buying.”
Reblog if you’re taking part in NaNoWriMo 2015
I’ll be following all of you
/cracks knuckles/ Let’s do this.
7 Things about me as a Writer
Seven things about me as a writer. Tagged a billion years ago on this one.
1. Whenever possible, I prefer to write by hand. I enjoy the feeling of the words carved into the page. (This adoration of mine is why I did not try NaNo until 2013. I couldn't see writing 50K in a month and then typing it in a week.)
2. I may be incapable of writing one thing at a time.
3. I believe in the power of sticky note editing. I color-code my note sets sometimes. My favorite set of sticky notes remains unopened.
4. I don't do much pre-writing, which may have to do with the sticky note bit. Mid-story I will synopsize, throw out chapters, make wall (and floor) diagrams and do all the things that should come before it, but in general I do those things as needed.
5. I have written novels, comic books, and plays. Only one novel, one comic, and one play have been released to the world.
6. I have made up a language to use in a story. Grammar, tenses, and conjugation. (It involved a lot of apostrophes.)
7. I enjoy finding small connections and "aha!" moments in my work. Who in Book 0 is related to who in Book 2, what someone did previously and how it stabs them in the kidneys later. It does, however, mean that occasionally things get lost. (I still can't find the bear wrestling!) Some things also happen away from the eyes of the story.
Statement of Intent
I’m putting this up here just so that I keep track of the fact that I have set a goal! I’m going to try to get to end of act 2 of Book 0 (which is not tracked in either chapters or word count because I am writing it by hand at present) by June 30th! I want to go back to finishing up Mistress, Transgression for the July Camp NaNo session.
–|| Excerpt, Book 0 ||–
(I was challenged to the 777 by James Stanley of http://parttimeshuffle.tumblr.com/ and this was the result.)
–|| Excerpt, Book 0 ||–
In a single gulp, Aullen finished his drink. Kamreide winced to see it. His cousin’s next words held all the wisdom of the spirits he had imbibed, which is to say that they were slurred and made little sense.
--|| Mistress: Transgression, excerpt ||--
"She has tolerated your habits, but I should not expect it to extend to your hypocrisy, were I you.”
--|| Mistress: Transgression, excerpt ||--
It would be both inaccurate and accurate, and vastly unkind, to say that the palace was gloomy in the wake of the Relighting. It was inaccurate because the lights were kept high in all the rooms and hallways as a show of the light kept within. It was accurate because the inhabitants of the palace were, themselves, gloomy. For some of the older servants, those who had served the family before the Queen had come, it was understandable. Some of them had been with the King when he was a boy, and had helped to raise the serious little boy along with the generals. For other, newer servants, the grief was more of a show presented for and to those who truly felt the loss.
--|| Mistress: Transgression, excerpt ||--
