Chapter 2: Tests of Worth and Virtue, is up!
Featuring:
- an inventory of a storeroom
-a sword fight
-an engagement party
-two men figuring out they are HOT for each other and also TOO SCARED to do anything about that.
-Ilya clocking everyone’s shit
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@blergherator
Chapter 2: Tests of Worth and Virtue, is up!
Featuring:
- an inventory of a storeroom
-a sword fight
-an engagement party
-two men figuring out they are HOT for each other and also TOO SCARED to do anything about that.
-Ilya clocking everyone’s shit
coming sooooooon to an ao3 near you
Kyle’s a centuries old demigod. He runs the Kingfisher, an inn and tavern that can go wherever it’s wanted or needed. His friends are tired of him moaning about his one night stands with inappropriate men and want him to find someone who’s devoted to him.
Eric’s a knight. He’s recently divorced and convinced he’s incapable of true passion, but he wants companionship. His secret solution? Become a monk. Even though he’s an atheist- at least he’ll be of service and living with likeminded people. He’ll tell his friends Scott and Kip right after their marriage.
Kyle offers Eric a chance to test whether or not he’s capable of passion. In bed.
It’s no big deal: someone like Eric would never want a life with Kyle, but at least he won’t go to a monastery. And Eric’s glad and a little nervous to have the attention what he assumes is a much younger man, even if he only wants a fling.
That’s until they unleash an ancient magic that will change them both forever.
And maybe they’ll figure out they’re exactly what the other one wants and needs.
First chapter is here!
One Knight Only
enjoy!!!!!!
coming sooooooon to an ao3 near you
Kyle’s a centuries old demigod. He runs the Kingfisher, an inn and tavern that can go wherever it’s wanted or needed. His friends are tired of him moaning about his one night stands with inappropriate men and want him to find someone who’s devoted to him.
Eric’s a knight. He’s recently divorced and convinced he’s incapable of true passion, but he wants companionship. His secret solution? Become a monk. Even though he’s an atheist- at least he’ll be of service and living with likeminded people. He’ll tell his friends Scott and Kip right after their marriage.
Kyle offers Eric a chance to test whether or not he’s capable of passion. In bed.
It’s no big deal: someone like Eric would never want a life with Kyle, but at least he won’t go to a monastery. And Eric’s glad and a little nervous to have the attention what he assumes is a much younger man, even if he only wants a fling.
That’s until they unleash an ancient magic that will change them both forever.
And maybe they’ll figure out they’re exactly what the other one wants and needs.
none pizza with left beef
It should be a rule of Tumblr to always reblog none pizza with left beef
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Sometimes I think about every Wholigan (listeners of Who? Weekly) in the Heated Rivalry universe seeing Shane and Ilya’s fan mail outing kiss and being like:
“The guy who did the White Russian Dunkin Macchiatto and Friendly’s Fribble crossover promo and with the man who did the most boring and unintentionally hilarious Architectural Digest tour video…. Are fucking? Good for them!!!!!”
Every few months from then on Bobby and Lindsay do a segment called H E DOUBLE HOCKEY STICKS where they discuss what Brands Ilya and Shane are doing SponCon for, but never actually discuss their play or what’s going on in the league. They also do a trenchant analysis of Hayden’s fanmails.
Harris is a long time listener, long time caller btw but never about Shane or Ilya or Troy, duh. He only calls in to comment on Starbucks cake pops or when a celeb does something insane involving a farm.
Y'all, writing a slowburn fanfic is wild. I have written 11k words. They have not kissed. I have some fun sex scenes planned, but damn if these two want to like, know each other before they start banging??????
Crazy. What is this. My second chance Hollanov boys were doing BJs in a barn by chapter four.
excellent news we’re like 14k in and they’ve separately made a plan to seduce the other one (respectfully).
update, 16k and they kissed.
this will all change in the final draft.
Y'all, writing a slowburn fanfic is wild. I have written 11k words. They have not kissed. I have some fun sex scenes planned, but damn if these two want to like, know each other before they start banging??????
Crazy. What is this. My second chance Hollanov boys were doing BJs in a barn by chapter four.
excellent news we’re like 14k in and they’ve separately made a plan to seduce the other one (respectfully).
a little obsessed with the story of how giacomo casanova was sharing a gondola with this random guy who suddenly started having a seizure, and casanova had some medical training so he stabilized the guy until the guy’s physician could be called. and then the physician bled the guy and put mercury ointment on him, which caused everything to get worse to the point that a priest was called to administer the guy’s last rites, but then casanova stepped in and washed off the mercury ointment despite the doctor yelling at him not to. and the guy recovered and turned out to be super rich and powerful and in gratitude bankrolled casanova’s debauchery for years until casanova got himself sentenced to five years in jail for blasphemy. also at one point he got shot through the hand in a duel and doctors wanted to amputate it but he said no it’ll be fine and it Was
so what i’m saying is a medical procedural show where the main character is giacomo casanova and he doesn’t want to be solving these medical mysteries but goddamn if he isn’t the only fucker in this room who knows how to not kill the patient. so i guess my date with this prussian chick will just have to wait
this pitch would have absolutely killed at the bbc between 1991 and 2005 btw
Y'all, writing a slowburn fanfic is wild. I have written 11k words. They have not kissed. I have some fun sex scenes planned, but damn if these two want to like, know each other before they start banging??????
Crazy. What is this. My second chance Hollanov boys were doing BJs in a barn by chapter four.
excellent news we’re like 14k in and they’ve separately made a plan to seduce the other one (respectfully).
The Fall and Rise of Reggie Dinkins Dr. Watson's Dad (1.06)
Y'all, writing a slowburn fanfic is wild. I have written 11k words. They have not kissed. I have some fun sex scenes planned, but damn if these two want to like, know each other before they start banging??????
Crazy. What is this. My second chance Hollanov boys were doing BJs in a barn by chapter four.
in reference to the garbles the clown post are you aware there’s a small section of the fandom that headcannons that Shane (similar to pork the hairless cat) has a childhood pet snake named spaghetti?!?! bc I was introduced to it via a they do fuck in the showers after the photoshoot fic and um… guys you cant drop a Shane has a baby cornsnake with ZERO CONTEXT and expect me to know wtf is happening lmao
I feel like this kinda implies that spaghetti was in the shower watching them and I’m here for that lmao
Really though, I love the Shane with a random pet agenda! It especially makes sense to me in fics where Shane and Ilya never dated. Not to make it…depressing, but I really could see a single deeply closeted late 20s Shane being like “No no, loved ones, you don’t have to worry about me. Not when I have…a cat!”
firm believer that while shane has his endorsements and is the face of every commercial, ilya is making a cameo in every action movie that'll have him. im talking fast and furious, mad max, pacific rim. he's a background character in a casino scene for one of the james bond movies. he's in fucking john wick. kingsman. godzilla. you name it. and he is proud of it, calls himself a movie star, "in more movies than rose landry!" just to get a rise out of shane. he's already ripped as fuck, anyway, he fits right in.
*this post brought to you by me specifically wanting ilya to have channing tatum's cameo in bullet train as "guy on the train who thinks the illegal crime dealings is a sex thing and wants to participate". i see that for him i really do. and then he'd get to meet benito, too.
I'm surprised the knight kink crowd hasn't picked up on the fact that historical knights had a habit of capturing each other for ransom. What do you mean you don't see the sexual tension in rivals seeking each other out in battle or through ambush, deliberately avoiding harming their target so they may be taken back to the attacker's castle, either held as a prisoner or as a honored "guest" as the case may be, until they are redeemed by their friends and allies?
@tenderheartedbrat
enemies to lovers arc where a knight takes a rival prisoner and then the captive's awful relatives just don't pay the ransom.
a while ago i saw someone say that Shane and Ilya are NOT mom/dad, they’re the gay uncles. Wyatt Hayes and Zane Boodram are however, mom and dad and i can’t unsee it now.