HELLO IM YOUR NEW FRIEND…I won’t tell you my name, that’s not important. Go on though, invite me in. Don’t ignore me, because of how dangerous I feel, I am your new friend. I bring a great profoundness amidst the recoil of my arrival. I fancy making things heavy. You know I am here to create a vulnerability, making you feel regret, pain & discomfort. Just a mere mentioning, of exactly who I am, will cause error. As you fill with confusion, you will beg me to leave, to stop making you feel misguided & misunderstood. I can’t stop being your friend though, you invited me here. I have to make you feel, the waves of shame & guilt when you think of me, because I have big plans for you. My friendship, guarantees, you won’t forget how difficult things felt for you. Some people fail to recollect after meeting me, foolishly thinking they can ignore all the things I did for them. I will stay, until you surrender, to the faults you made knowingly, damn well, I would show up at the door. This wasn’t a mess up, you messed up & I’m the only one who can leave you feeling so beautifully exposed. I will come for you, as you lie unarmed, open, leaking out your thoughts, memories & all the emotions that you put away so neatly enfolded. See now you can’t hide, I’m the best seeker. It’s cute you tried.
YOU CAN’T AVOID IT…
I know by now you are eager to know my name. By now you’re wondering why you would want a friend like me. Why would you want a friend with such a force? A friend able to erect such emotion inside of you. As terrible as I am capable of making you feel, I’m just as good at bringing success to your life & I want only the best for you only if you, will have it. I will be encouraging you to find accountability, from the regret I make you feel, my friendship doesn’t have to hold you prisoner to the past forever. You have free will to make this all better. When I am fully revealed I don’t want to make the mistake of thinking, that you can outrun me or that you can fix this yourself. Don’t delay the inevitable, I won’t ever be that friend, who takes away from the procession of meeting each step fully. I must take a moment to brag to make clear, of who I am. I am one of life’s most valuable teachers & now I am your friend. It won’t be long until you keep avoiding all of the feelings & the emotions that swiftly arrive, after I have whispered directly into your heart, leaving a powerful impression.
GET THROUGH THE GUILT...
I will make you feel all the big things when I am your friend, like the emotionally volatile jolts that hit right on time, every time, into the pit of your stomach. I know that this shitty feeling come from me, but I only do it to keep pushing you. This isn’t just to make you feel repugnant & never redeeming. I mean you got me invited me here! I do have madness to my method & from the beginning I was honest about having two sides to my friendship. I want you to know the side of me you can grow from, to learn from & this jolt I bring, is to awaken you. My forceful alarm, sounding in pandemonium, to WATCH, LISTEN, FEEL, HEAR. Its telling you everything you need to know. I am begging you to shut up, enlighten yourself before the guilt becomes too heavy to bear, leaving you to believe, because of me, you will forever be amiss. The longer I am here, without getting know both sides to me, you will begin to feel far from benevolent & too far to forgive yourself. You will grow to bitter, from the shame, to come back home, inwardly abandoning yourself. I am here, until you’re ready to stop bypassing, a truth that is wrapped in a deep discomfort. I know you’re scared, but in the end, I will save you.
(A good example of truth wrapped in discomfort Have you ever ate candied warheads? Eat one ever? They are SOUR & CONFUSING in the beginning & when you ate it, you didn’t know better, you hadn’t experience it yourself and now you want to figure it out on your own…BAM! SOUR SOUR!! Right as you are about to give up on this experience, you become calmer, the warhead is sweet and even chewy, you sat with it long enough to show you goods in this experience.)
FIND UNDERSTANDING...
There won’t be a lesson right away. You may not even know I am there, but if you should decide that pain is your company, you can count on me. You won’t like it when I get there, even refusing to show face, to what you have done. You will probably cry for hours & scream until you feel like you have come undone & free. You will convince yourself you are an innocent as you try your very best to convince the others around you. When I show up, to be your friend, others always finding out, adding their own perspective on things, creating even more of a burden for you. Though I am by your side, you still refuse me, adding to the pain instead of the learning. It’s difficult to see this now, but I have wanted to see you grow from the moment we met, to find true healing in what lay beyond, the pain of our friendship. I don’t want to see you, forever hate yourself, for my existence, before even getting to know me. Ignoring any of this, won’t draw inference, you can’t mask what is.
TAKE RESPONSIBILITY...
I won’t be offended if you try avoiding me, I will try to persuade you, to move closer to the healing, that waits for you. I will have your back, through all your regrets & your avoidance's. You & I both know, at this point, there needs to be culmination, a time to find proof in my promises. I am here so that you can find fullness out of all the suffering my friendship brings into your life, the lessons you will learn as long as your willing to have the courage to size up in the upswing of taking accountability. My hope is never to stay longer than needed & I want to be a reminder of why we must learn from things we screwed up on. Your next step is to, find expansion from my existence, becoming mindfully aware of what went wrong & officially taking your role in this difficulty. You found entry into recognizing the ongoing flow of slip ups & hassles that will always be in this forever moving world of ours.
ACCEPTANCE...
At last, on behalf of our friendship, you have found acceptance. You are ready to master all that comes with, knowing better, despite the curve-some, that I bring into your days. You no longer have a need to ignore the process of growth because you have found change! Benefits from change are, useful in helping us to minimize unnecessary or extra oopsies. The promise of safety is here, as you take responsibility & no longer fighting your reality. Handling the events of a mishap, tend to get much easier, when we voluntarily realign for our future, leaving behind, illusions of uncertainty. You have found stability within your new wisdom. You are ready to flourish, making sure, to act on self-discipline, whenever you think of seeing me again, building it slowly like a muscle so that you may have fewer and fewer mistakes.
I would like to reveal myself to you now. “It’s nice to meet you finally, my name is MISTAKE.”
WHERE THERE IS DARK THERE IS LIGHT...
Your mistakes don’t define you. You are in no way a, mess up, confused or a bad guy. Mistakes are very human of us, they better allow us to understand, when we do wrong cultivating self forgiveness. Forgiveness is a vital tool, for checking on ourselves & to take a closer look at our limits. We must be patient in the darkest of experiences, so we can feel the warmth of light, when things look brighter. We must walk towards our mistake so we find a connection that begins informing & reestablishing our values. Making mistakes shakes us into doing more for others & ourselves. Our many mistakes are there to remind us, the value of forgiveness & promoting compassion for others.
-Jordan
