Blogging Akymbo

Love coffee, dogs, and dismantling the patriarchy. Sometimes I make a funny. (tumblr c.2009)

[theonion]

As public schools across the country increasingly face budget shortfalls, educators like Patricia Harper, a fifth-grade teacher in Baltimore, have reportedly found it more necessary than ever to provide their own salaries. “I’m committed to coming into this classroom every day and helping my students learn, but in order to do this, I’m now required to dip into my own pocket to cover my annual income,” said the 10-year veteran of Baltimore City Public Schools, a district with more than 5,000 teachers who together would need to come up with an estimated $340 million to meet their annual salary requirements.

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[redstonedust]

being too warm during the day: well, this sucks, but this temperature makes sense because the sun is up, and the sun is making me warm. i am unhappy but logically i can deal with it for now.

being too warm at night: what if i kill everybody.

[docrobinavitch]

i fear that some of you take yourselves far too seriously for adults who log into tumblr every day

[oxypill]

another week of whatever the fuck this shit is

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[le-jardin-inculte]

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

[shithowdy]

at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.

[whitachi]

at some point in your life you will be adding a small pasta to a soup and you will think "that is not enough small pasta." this is the devil talking. the pasta will absorb the stock and expand. this is how you end up with a soup that is a solid mass of soggy ditalini.

[araceil]

At some point in your life you will be adding garlic to a dish and you will think "that is not enough garlic." These are angels speaking. They are correct. Add more garlic.

[probuccalfat]

the goal is get so secure and confident that i’m 7th grade weird again

[wizardnaturalist]

a book should be $5 a little drink should be $2 and museum access should be free and all hours

[theonion]

Saying the nation had enjoyed a perfectly adequate amount of dribbling, passing, and loud chanting, a new report published Tuesday confirmed that was enough soccer for now. “Welp, that was fun, but we’ve got our fill,” the report read in part, adding that after a couple weeks of watching men from places like Italy, Bulgaria, or wherever kick the ball back and forth, Americans were ready to thank everyone involved and move on to something else.

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[montereybayaquarium]

Harmful changes to Endangered Species Act

Now, more changes to the Endangered Species Act by the current administration continue to attack crucial parts of the law to protect habitat and newly listed species.

These changes prioritize harmful development over science-based management and make it harder to put species on a path to recovery.

A healthy marine ecosystem is essential to support biodiversity and save endangered species. We need an Endangered Species Act and management guided by science and expertise that puts the environment first.

Sign up for ocean action emails to learn more about what you can do to support endangered species:

Sign up for ocean action emails

Get the latest ocean news, sustainable living tips, and simple ways to take action for a healthier ocean.

And read our statement here:

Monterey Bay Aquarium denounces Trump-Vance administration weakening…

New regulations undo core elements crucial for protecting vulnerable species and their habitats.

[nevver]

The Diaries of Franz Kafka

[parkayquarts]

so many amazing words in the english language. you have clandestine and precarious and serendipity and iconoclast and then you also have staunch and sludge and slurp and smudge

[therustyskull]

I feel like this photo implies that somehow the Canada geese are involved in this.

[nevver]

The New Yorker, Sofia Warren

[swagophile]

important reminder that most people you follow online are significantly lamer than you think they are including me. and if you feel insecure comparing yourself to someone online: DON'T. theyre probably also lame and weird. most people on the internet are

[most-sane-classicist]

reblog if you're also lame and weird.

[noah-wyles]

this is such a fantastic and reassuring response

[probablily]

sometimes i agree with a post but i dont like your attitude

[theonion]