you're supposed to title these things???

...

[girlballs]

my crinkling scrinklet

[girlballs]

no it's good for her

[quietwingsinthesky]

noncon romance. is this anything.

[quietwingsinthesky]

Confessions on the brink of death a character accepts out of kindness because it won’t matter soon anyway, but then the other person doesn’t die, the other person expects them to carry through on their promise to love them and gets angry when they try to back out. Blackmail held over someone’s head just to force them to flirt and make romantic advances on another person, so it looks like they wanted this relationship. Talks about marriage and happily ever afters together as a threat. “I love you, I love you, I love you” as a violation that you’re expected to smile at and be grateful for, because you’re supposed to want to be loved. noncon romance.

[quietwingsinthesky]

adding to this: feeling love against your will. love forced on you by some power beyond you. love that you know you wouldn’t feel if you weren’t blessed (cursed) by it. love that you don’t want and is ruining you and that everyone keeps praising you for feeling. love that everyone around you gets mad at you for rejecting anyway. love that’s made so overpowering that it wipes out any semblance of “you” that there is to make way for a thing that will love someone back.

[quietwingsinthesky]

funniest part of this post is how many people reblog it tagged something like “this sounds aromantic” or “op not to derail but aromanticism” and like well guys you’re never going to believe why i find forced romance such a horrifying concept-

[valtsv]

can't stop thinking about how hysterical project hail mary would be from rocky's pov when you consider that, by eridian standards, basic human functioning is simultaneously an incredibly hostile and violently perverted body horror fetish nightmare. imagine you make first contact with an alien and it's an apex predator with an obscene number of orifices, made up mostly of toxic substances that it oozes constantly from said orifices, thrives in an unforgivingly cold and suffocating atmosphere, is highly motivated by searching for its next meal + consumes its food publicly in violation of your society's main taboo, and is capable of rapidly transitioning from vulnerable in sleep to alert and in full possession of its faculties at the slightest change in stimuli. grace is in a heartwarming scifi buddy comedy and meanwhile rocky is bonded with and planning on bringing home his species' equivalent of the xenomorph.

[valtsv]

POV you're welcoming home your planet's heroic saviours

[valtsv]

can't stop thinking about how hysterical project hail mary would be from rocky's pov when you consider that, by eridian standards, basic human functioning is simultaneously an incredibly hostile and violently perverted body horror fetish nightmare. imagine you make first contact with an alien and it's an apex predator with an obscene number of orifices, made up mostly of toxic substances that it oozes constantly from said orifices, thrives in an unforgivingly cold and suffocating atmosphere, is highly motivated by searching for its next meal + consumes its food publicly in violation of your society's main taboo, and is capable of rapidly transitioning from vulnerable in sleep to alert and in full possession of its faculties at the slightest change in stimuli. grace is in a heartwarming scifi buddy comedy and meanwhile rocky is bonded with and planning on bringing home his species' equivalent of the xenomorph.

[valtsv]

POV you're welcoming home your planet's heroic saviours

[snarling-through-our-smiles]

[hypokeimena]

image description: tweet by olayemi olurin @/msolurin, reading: There's no high like making a successful hail mary argument. A prosecutor once asked for bail on my client because he had like 63 convictions and I was like judge... 63 convictions sounds like a man who showed up to court at least 63 times. And the judge was like yea you right /end description

[cattycattitude]

[girldraki]

[leavethepuddle]

@sarumans

[what-even-is-thiss]

“Your pets only love you because you feed them”

Yeah well that’s also how your relationship with your parents starts out but more stuff happens after that doesn’t it

[aberrantemotion]

i never fed my parents as a baby though.

[s-t-a-r-c-o]

im reading discworld and im on the third book and i only just realized they arent arranged like this

[sator-the-wanderer]

I raise it to

[sandpancakecat]

My mom thought it was an elephant standing on four turtles

[calamity-corner]

new chess piece called the jester which can move anywhere on the board but can't capture anything. it just gets in the way to annoy your opponent

[calamity-corner]

hold on let me look something up

what yhe hell

[not100bees]

The thing about Miss Piggy is that she kind of has a Roger Rabbit comedy superpower where she wins nearly any conceivable fight she's in. But unlike other characters of which that's true, like say, Bugs Bunny, who tend to win because they make the opponent play the game with their rules, Miss Piggy wins because the joke is that she can beat the shit out of literally anybody.

[not100bees]

Bugs Bunny beats Thanos by setting up an airport and making him take off the Infinity Gauntlet to go through the metal detector.

Miss Piggy beats Thanos by karate chopping him in the face and sending him flying.

[animedads-deactivated20210108]

[gilkenansmonsterhouse2006-deact]

i have not seen this meme in so long im loving it

[adulthoodisokay]

one of the reasons i love tumblr is that occasionally classic memes like this show up on my dashboard

[catgirlforeskin]

It’s like reaching into the cupboard for food and accidentally finding a 19 year old can of soup that you’ve kept for sentimental reasons

[clementine-kesh]

network effect is really good because to amena murderbot is basically just a babysitter with guns but to everyone from the corporate rim it’s like seeing a teen hanging out with a grizzly bear and when they’re like what the hell she’s just like yeah that’s my mom’s friend it’s lame as fuckkkk

[marlynnofmany]

"It scared away a creepy guy who was into me; that was super embarrassing."

"'Embarrassing' is what you got out of that? And it scared him away alive??"

"Duh, of course. It was rude about it, though."

[dasloddl]

op disabled reblogs but I think the point still stands

[prokopetz]

Flavours of unreliable narrator:

Lying to the reader

Lying to themselves

Simply misinformed

Not paying attention

Has weird priorities

Assumed you knew

Hates you personally

Bad at communicating

Easily sidetracked

Will believe anything

Has weird prejudices

Just kind of dumb

[razielim]

*sound of murderbot getting bingo in the distance as it checks off each one*

*immediately followed by sound of ratthi arguing with it about point 12*

[seeingteacupsindragons]

”Ryland Grace’s life was valued less because he was single,” is such a weird take because it depends entirely on the idea that Eva Stratt might have hesitated if he weren’t.

Eva. Stratt. Eva Stratt is a bulldozer who takes out Antarctica and the Sahara and commanders an entire Chinese naval aircraft carrier.

Eva Stratt would have thrown his ass on that rocket if he had ten wives.

[seeingteacupsindragons]

[beatlesweatles]

Evil Shakespeare be like: MacDeath

[beatlesweatles]

[windsandstar]

ive got a scary math joke but im 2² to say it