hello world i am 15 minutes old
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
occasionally subtle
Not today Justin
Game of Thrones Daily
Monterey Bay Aquarium

ellievsbear
d e v o n
YOU ARE THE REASON
No title available
hello vonnie

gracie abrams
Stranger Things
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

Origami Around

oozey mess
RMH

No title available

@theartofmadeline
Xuebing Du

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@chronic-catposting
hello world i am 15 minutes old
Look I love unconditional devotion love stories as much as the next person, but there's really something so deliciously raw about conditional devotion.
I have served you and I have loved you for decades, but I will not give up my principles for you. You cut out part of my heart and took it with you down that path that you insist on walking, but you walk it alone. Even when the bleeding, gaping hole you left in my chest kills me, I will not follow you.
me everytime one of my seemingly non-specific homoerotic text posts breaks containment
Zillow house listings
>go right
>go left instead (looks nice and fun!)
>…go back to the right
Go left
Go forward
Go right ->
Open the door! :3c
I wanna see what’s inside!
Congratulations! You Have Made It To The Ping Pong Chamber!
Do you know how hard it is to live with a cat that has the intelligence level of literally like a 3 year old but the pure chaos of a high ranking demon?
He’s learned to open the lazy Susan and won’t stop clawing open the flour and rolling in it like a little chinchilla
Criminal charges
Hey hey hey HEY
He’s been CRAWLING INTO THE BOTTOM CABINETS to TEAR OPEN THE INSTANT POTATOES and EAT BAGS AND BAGS OF THEM I’m livid but also impressed.
Do you have anything with that kind of texture that he can safely play with? This sounds like an understimulation issue.
He’s not playing with it
He’s eating it.
I can tell because the bags are nearly empty except for a few small clumps.
I knew he loves mashed potatoes. I just didn’t know the extent he’d go to to get them.
We had him tested and in the course of that vet visit he stole
6 tips
3 of the ear light cover things
Our other cats collar
the ear bud of the vets stethoscope 
several hearts
a plastic glove
the vet techs hair tie
Also yeah he’s fine he just likes to steal
Not guilty by reason of deficiency of other people’s stuff
This is his ledge
His ledge is taller then my husband who is 6’2”
I am 5’5”
I have to get the step ladder out once a week and see what Orange Sherbert has taken to his ledge for safe keeping. It’s usually the remote.
Narratively speaking, ending this saga with the reveal that his name is Orange Sherbert was a masterstroke.
... how many hearts are in the vet office
ive always been extremely Orange
reblog to give a trans woman a yummy burger
glad i reached my target audience of ppl showing love to their trans gfs/wives through the power of burger
okay so since making this post i've become the target audience
as you may know, ive been studying mandarin for about a year now. i just got this new tattoo that says "peace and love" :)
girl got the shrimps is bugs tattoo 笑死了
okay
Donkey heaven is the same as Ocnus hell it’s very efficient
Donkey heaven is
the same as Ocnus hell it’s
very efficient
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
REMEMEBER IF HARD WATER IS CAUSING CALCIUM BUILDUP IN YOUR BONG, JUST LET SOME WHITE VINEGAR SIT IN THAT THING FOR A FEW MINUTES AND SHE'LL BE LOOKIN BRAND NEW. JUST DONT SMOKE WEED WOTH THE VINEGAR INSIDE PLEASE
I am not nearly advanced enough to come away from such a maneuver unscathed
So I just simultaneously did, and possibly didn't lose my job today :)
Very much did in the sense that I literally do not know where my job is at the moment. But, for the time being I haven't been let go because nobody else including the store owner knows where it is either.
So, I don't wanna risk doxxing myself by posting pictures but goddamn am I tempted because this is not a believable event. This is a cartoon problem. For looneytoons.
But yeah, so, I work(ed?) at a kiosk selling boba tea, right? Freestanding kiosk in the mall with full water and electrical hookups and multiple fridges and sinks and a mini kitchen and the works. Fully functional tea shop. Very important to note that it was there last night, The work chat was discussing another issue last night at closing time. I'll get back to this.
It's been showing signs of being on the way out with how business is being handled lately and I've been considering other options, which is probably why I'm not as torn up about this as I should be, but maybe it just hasn't set in yet, but that's not the point. The point is there's been a lot of shit breaking and not being replaced and nobody mentioning anything about it until I walk into work in the morning and have to figure out why shit like the fucking cash register isn't there today. So I'm kinda used to having to ask questions about big things that nobody bothered to update me on. I was out for two weeks recovering from a surgery, so I came to work this morning assuming there'd be some kind of bullshit, yeah?
So, the question I had to ask the chat this morning was:
Not a text I ever thought I'd have to send in sincerity, but there it is. Because what I found instead was a fenced off patch of discolored tiles and a few holes in the floor where my entire place of employment used to be.
And the answer? Nobody knows! It was there last night when the mall closed, and every single trace of the structure and all its contents including drink making supplies and our safe and cashbox was gone when it opened again. And when I say nobody knows, I mean everyone from last night's closers to the actual (former?) owner of the store jad no fucking clue about this until getting that text from me this morning. For once I am actually the first to know. 🎉.
So. I guess I didn't so much lose my job as had it stolen. Not by AI, but good old fashioned hands-on human beings picking it up and carrying it away somehow. All mall security would tell me was that they were instructed not to tell me anything and have us contact our management. Who also don't know anything. And later on I came across some construction workers around the gravesite of the kiosk discussing filling in the holes, asked them about it, and was told that they "weren't at liberty to say".
So, not only is my job gone in the most literal physical sense of the word, but it was taken in some kind of super secret kiosk extraction in the dead of night without any warning or witnesses and nobody is allowed to speak of it. The store owner said she was gonna figure it out 10 hours ago and still no word back.
I don't know what else to say aside from I've been laughing all day and I'm gonna have a hell of a time explaining Schrodinger's Unemployment to the benefits office.
Update that is not an update because I'm basically certain this isn't what actually happened:
My mother in law thinks the FBI took it.
Not any of the other stores around the state. Just the one little kiosk.
Why? Because she loves a conspiracy and is just a little bit extra.
Also because she was around for the massive crackdown on Yakuza-owned businesses in Waikiki (in her homestate) that did actually involve the FBI seizing stores (no confirmation of making kiosks cleanly disappear in the middle of the night though).
Still no word from my job on what's actually going on, but the most likely theory so far is that maybe the kiosk was on lease and got repossessed? The mystery continues
(also shout out to the person who proposed Carmen Sandiego)
ACTUAL (partial) UPDATE:
According to the owner, based on what she's been able to find out, the kiosk was not removed legally and they're starting a potentially long process of legal action. I hope she gets to sue the shit out of whoever did it but for now at least I know for sure I'm unemployed.
Really hoping for more details in terms of who/why/how, so I'll keep updating if I learn anything.
For now the summary is: An unnamed entity that is most likely mall management (on account of mall security cooperating with them) stole an entire kiosk and all the contents including money and machinery with barely a trace in the middle of the night grinch-style, with zero warning or explanation, and ensured the silence of both security and the construction crew, in an action that was definitely preplanned and illegal, and as far as I know nobody knows its whereabouts.
So now I'm officially out of a job. Because my workplace was literally stolen in the night.
Actually fuck it let's share some photos cause I wouldn't be inclined to believe this myself. It's not like anyone can stalk me at my job now and I'm not gonna have to see any coworkers that might find my tumblr.
Enjoy the unintentionally funniest text I've ever sent in my life
Aaand a close-up:
The last remains of a once Very Much Solid And Immobile Workplace
HEY HI HELLO THIS ONE'S MY FAVORITE
via @kagaminilen
[cut to a kiosk on legs, sipping a boba, while wandering into the nearest forest on chicken legs]
Here you go @a-bit-too-dyscrasic
Oh my goodness you're my hero this is so beautiful
Holy fuck my job got fan art
hey. is this yours?
HOLY SHIT
edit: I should clarify this isn't my kiosk. my kiosk was probably taken out in pieces and most likely by mall management. but it's an extremely funny coincidence
SMALL UPDATE
Still haven't heard back from the unemployment office, but a few days ago I ended up telling this to the SNAP caseworker, who absolutely lost her shit and then put everything on hold to go investigate this herself out of a sense of justice and Needing To Know More. World's most nosy angel who helped me out a lot in general (in case she ends up seeing this: I appreciate her so much).
While she didn't find a facebook listing for a used kiosk (yes, that post is just a coincidence, I'm sorry), what she did find was the actual kiosk for sale. By the owner. On a reputable website.
Now, there are a lot of funny conclusions to be drawn from this, but I'm afraid it's not quite that wild. I asked a friend in management about it and turns out the listing is from months before the disappearance, it wasn't kept a secret, it just wasn't relevant. She had been trying to sell it for a while without much luck, wasn't selling the entire business, but just the kiosk with that branch included (the listing advertised that it would include the equipment and drink recipes and retain the current staff). It also said the lease with the mall was active until some time in 2027.
So, no, as funny as that would be, the owner did not heist her own kiosk. However, what this does tell us is:
She must have owned the kiosk outright, so the only way this could be a repossession is if she had a mortgage on it? I guess?
It definitely isn't about the lease being up. So any eviction would legally require like 30-days notice and, presumably, a valid reason like a violation of the terms. (this is how it works with renting homes in my country, and I've never rented a business location, so I can only guess that it's similar)
The store was not financially beneficial enough to keep. This could just mean that she was focusing on other ventures like she says in the listing, but it could really also mean that she was having money trouble and couldn't afford to keep the location.
SO. This leaves the most likely scenario being that the owner was behind on rent, and the mall manager (who has a history of being outta control and pulling shit like this, as well as harassing asian businesses and our shop specifically) decided to illegally remove the entire kiosk about it.
Still no confirmation at all about anything, but I remembered the listing today and realized it gave some additional clues.
Also, sorry to go asking, but I'm gonna slip my ko-fi link in here because both final checks and unemployment are taking much longer than expected, and I had to move apartments very suddenly (like found out the day after losing my job kine sudden), which is burning through my savings too. The job market in my region is absolute dogshit right now and I'm partially disabled so I'm kinda freaking out. Everyone's struggling right now so if you're enjoying the story but can't donate please don't feel guilty, I also like sharing the laughs.
More of a status update than a kiosk update:
Still no updates from the boss.
Most of my coworkers have been paid, but she hasn't responded to any of my messages so I'm probably gonna have to call her. I did go to BOLI about it, but they're backlogged for the next six months lmao.
Got approved for unemployment, who will be paying me less than my rent each month but at least it's something. Working on finding a new job.
We got a new apartment and are in the process of moving in, and trying to contest a lease break fee on account of the old place becoming unlivable.
Got a crack in the car windshield as soon as things started looking up because the universe Is Not Having That.
My partner got me a novelty dishtowel to commemorate the incident
(I love him)
source
something I really enjoy is that I've now seen like 4 or 5 variations of roughly this same video, all slightly different in their angles and timing while obviously being the exact same bunny and room, implying that this is a consistent and frequent behavior for this bunny instead of just a funny thing it did once that got caught on camera. I wish I could have as much raw unfiltered enthusiasm for anything as this little rabbit has for its dinnertime
I quote this and laugh to myself very, very often.
What would you do if you were scrolling through recommended tumblr posts and one was from someone you don't know and it was just a picture of your dad captioned "fucking hate this guy" and it had hundreds of notes
reblog it
Uncles and Nephews can perform especially powerful attacks together. Experiment with different uncles and nephews to discover their unique abilities.
this is what LMFAO did with party rock anthem
huh
I took my little brother (autistic, mostly non verbal) out and he was using his voice keyboard to tell me something, and this little boy (maybe 4 or 5?) heard him and asked me "Is he a robot??" I tried to explain to him that no, he isn't a robot, he just communicates differently, but my darling brother was in the background max volume "I am robot I am robot I am robot I am robot"
My little brother insisted if I was going to post about him, he wanted a cut of the "profits". When I explained to him that Tumblr isn't monetized, and is pretty pointless, he and my older brother pointed out that he'd still be bringing me "fame and notoriety" if the post got "big". So we agreed, if the post hit 10k notes, which seemed extremely farfetched and silly at the time, I'd take my little brother out for sushi (his favorite food) and let him eat as much as he wants.
I guess God wanted the little robot to enjoy some sushi 🍣 🥲
they're designed to be a subversion of the living weapon shtick like bro is chilling. living the best life. perfect for em. they just dont show it on their face much